Category: introverts

Well, since my kids are gone and I retired 15 years ago, demanding takes on a new meaning.

It’s usually a medical issue for me now as I’m going through several things that don’t get fixed overnight.

I know I harp on it a lot, but being introverted means I unwind and recharge my battery by being alone.

I read a lot of books, exercise a lot, and write constantly. I have 25 times as much in my private diary as gets posted here.

Demanding Days for me are doctor appointments or social engagements. If I can avoid those, my need to unwind is much less than it used to be.

How Do You Use Social Media?

Daily writing prompt

How do you use social media?

(Here’s one way to move beyond small talk quicker if you’re an introvert who hates it.)

I avoid it now.

I was one of the first Facebook accounts. When I figured out it was people putting on a false face to show you how good their life is was a lie, I had my doubts. When people whom I thought I’d gotten out of my life wanted to reconnect, I eliminated it. Now, I don’t have to be reminded of birthdays, wasted time online, and have re-disconnected with those I don’t want to talk to. There are people in my family I don’t want to see anymore, either in person or online.

I had Twitter (X) until it became a time suck, and I also retired and didn’t need it. I quit before Musk bought it when it was a cesspool of hate and censorship.

So mostly, I stay away from it to make my life better, free up my time, and keep my past in the past.

I worked in the tech industry for 3.5 decades, and I know how bad Meta, Google, Microsoft, and the rest of them are. My life is immensely better without that distraction. I knew those people, and I knew they were bad actors. I know how much they sell your personal life if you are on these platforms, so my spam is way down.

I use my blog as my social media outreach. Some read it, most don’t. I put a lot of stuff about my life on these pages about who I am, and that is enough.

For me, being an introvert, it has been a blessing. Unwanted people are out of my life digitally, and I don’t have to think about those who I thought I’d parted ways with once already.

I makes me happier to live this way. YMMV

For Introverts, How to Feel Less Exhausted by Group Conversations

If you’re introverted or neurodivergent, it means your brain is processing more during group conversations than other people realize.

I could feel myself disappearing into the background.

I was sitting at a table with six other adults in a noisy coffee shop. We were all strangers, meeting for a book club for the first time.

I had joined the group because I love reading, but also because I wanted to make a few new friends. As an introvert, I don’t always make friends easily, so I thought it would help to have a built-in topic to talk about — the book.

But suddenly, I was back in a familiar introvert struggle that had been with me my whole life: a group conversation.

The conversation moved fast, bouncing from person to person with no structure. Even when I had something meaningful to say, I couldn’t get my thoughts out quickly enough before someone else started talking. When I did speak, someone often interrupted me before I was finished, and I felt pressure to rush just to get my words out.

All around me, other people were talking and laughing. Coffee machines hissed. Orders were being called out. Sometimes I couldn’t hear well, but more than that, as a highly sensitive person, I could feel my mind getting overstimulated. I started mentally checking out.

If you’ve had a similar experience, you’re not alone. Group conversations aren’t always easy for introverts, highly sensitive people, or neurodivergent people. Since that book club, I’ve learned a few things about group conversations that make them a little easier. They might help you, too.

Why Group Conversations Are Draining

If group conversations feel harder than one-on-one conversations, you’re not imagining it. Group conversations are a different social task altogether. They aren’t just one-on-one conversations with more people added.

The more people in the conversation, the harder it becomes to follow what’s happening, know when to jump in, and get a fair share of speaking time. Research on conversation shows that human turn-taking is extremely fast. Usually, there are only a few hundred milliseconds between when one person stops talking and another person begins.

(Fun fact: In one study, Danish speakers had the longest average gap between turns, which I find interesting because Danish culture is supposedly very introvert-friendly.)

All of this adds to something called cognitive load. When you have to deal with multiple speakers at once, or keep switching your attention from one speaker to another, you listen more slowly and less accurately. That higher listening demand makes it even harder to know when to speak.

In other words, big groups place more demands on your attention, memory, and energy than one-on-one conversations do.

And it doesn’t help if you’re in a noisy public place, with other sounds and sights competing for your attention, like I was at that book club.

If you’re introverted, sensitive, or neurodivergent, it doesn’t mean you have nothing to say. It means your brain is taking in and processing more stimuli than other people often realize.

How to Make Group Conversations Easier

Whenever possible, I try to socialize one-on-one or in small groups. It lowers my cognitive load and helps me protect my energy as an introvert.

But sometimes that’s just not possible. You may also have to deal with group conversations at work, at networking events, or at family gatherings.

So here are a few ways to make them a little easier:

1. Jump in early.

Research shows that as groups get bigger, it gets harder for everyone to participate equally. Often, one or two people end up dominating the conversation. That was definitely true at my book club. One man seemed to think he was the main character.

Making a comment early helps in two ways. First, it removes the pressure of trying to find the perfect moment later. Second, it makes it easier for other people to bring you back into the conversation as things go on.

It can also reflect well on you. Speaking early can make you seem confident, even if you feel anything but confident inside.

And your comment doesn’t have to be brilliant. It can be tiny, like an interesting observation, a moment of agreement, or a clarifying question.

Another reason to speak early is your social battery. As the event goes on, you may lose steam, and group conversations can drain your energy even faster. Even if it goes against your quiet nature, talking early lets you contribute while your energy is still at its highest.

Once the introvert hangover starts to set in, it gets harder to think clearly, listen well, and put your thoughts into words.

2. Use follow-up questions as your entry point.

Not sure how to jump in? Ask a question right after someone finishes talking. Follow-up questions are easier than coming up with a completely new topic under pressure.

Good examples are:

“What happened next?”
“How did you feel about it?”
“Was that what you expected?”
“Would you do it again?”
“What did you learn?”

In a group, follow-up questions do double duty. They lower your cognitive load, and they make the speaker feel heard.

Research has also found that people like you more when you ask follow-up questions, because it shows that you’re interested in them. In one study, people who asked more follow-up questions during speed dating were more likely to get asked on second dates.

This approach also plays to a natural introvert strength. One of our conversational superpowers is helping a discussion go one layer deeper instead of jumping from topic to topic. Introverts are often the ones who move beyond small talk and into more interesting, meaningful territory. And the science supports that instinct: People often expect deeper conversations to feel awkward, but they actually leave people feeling more connected.

Just make sure to read the room. If the group is joking around or rushing with excited energy, a deep question can feel a little out of place. For example, a group that’s quickly swapping travel stories probably won’t want to pause for a deep question about how childhood shaped the way someone experiences adventure.

3. Switch to listening mode when your social battery runs low.

It happens to all of us introverts at some point: You just run out of social energy.

When that happens, it may be time to leave. But if you can’t get away just yet, switch into listening mode. This can help you conserve energy without fully checking out.

Even if it’s obvious you’ve gotten quieter, you don’t want to give the impression that you’re uninterested. Use visible listening cues. Look at the speaker. Nod. Briefly reflect back a phrase. Offer a short verbal cue like, “That makes sense.”

In groups, not everyone talks all the time. Being visibly attentive is still a way of participating.

And if someone points out that you’ve gotten quieter, remember that the strongest response is usually the least dramatic one. Be comfortable with who you are, acknowledge the comment, and then move on.

As I share in my 30-page guide, Confident Introvert Scripts, you could say:

“I’m more of a listener.”
“I’m just taking things in.”
“To be honest, I’m more of an internal processor.”
“I’m just not a big chatter, but I’m enjoying listening.”
“I get that question a lot, but I’m actually very comfortable.”
“I’m honestly more interested in hearing from you.”
“I tend to speak up once I’ve fully formed my thoughts.”

When the social event is over, plan for some extra “me time.” Because of everything going on, group conversations can be overstimulating, even when you enjoy the people you’re with. There’s nothing wrong with needing a breather afterward, or going home and planning no other social activities for the rest of the day.

Here’s my 2 cents: don’t go to these things. It’s never worth it, and halfway through, you want to leave and realize you don’t want to be there.

The Science Behind Why Introverts Need Alone Time

I know that if I have the chance, I’m going to either be alone or with my dog.

ByJenn Granneman April 6, 2026

The next time an introvert in your life needs alone time, remember it’s not personal. They need solitude because that’s how they’re wired.

I love spending time alone. There’s nothing better than being at home in my comfy clothes, reading a good book, or watching a show while munching on snacks. This doesn’t mean I don’t crave time with “my people” — those I laugh with and share my day with. But when I don’t get enough alone time, I start to feel tired, cranky, and overstimulated, even if I’ve enjoyed being with the people I love.

I show all the classic signs of being an introvert.

Sometimes when I need alone time, the people in my life feel hurt. They feel rejected, but that’s not what it means. I need little periods of solitude to recharge my energy and feel like myself again.

Why do introverts need alone time? Why does socializing exhaust us, even when we’re having fun? Recent research offers some interesting insights. I delve deeper into these findings in my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts.

The Curious Connection Between Introverts and Rewards

When writing my book, I spoke with Colin DeYoung, a psychology professor at the University of Minnesota who had published a paper on introversion. He explained that one reason introverts need alone time is related to how we respond to rewards.

No, I’m not talking about the gold stars you might have earned in grade school (though it could be argued that stickers are indeed a reward for kids). For adults, rewards can be things like money, social status, social connections, food, and even sex. When you get promoted at work or convince an attractive stranger to give you their phone number, you’re receiving a reward. Hurray!

Of course, introverts also value things like money, relationships, and food. However, researchers believe that introverts are wired to respond differently to rewards than extroverts. Compared to our more outgoing counterparts, we “quiet ones” are simply less motivated and energized by these same rewards. It’s as if extroverts see big, juicy steaks everywhere, while introverts see overcooked hamburgers.

In fact, as any introvert can confirm, sometimes those “rewards” aren’t just less appealing — they can actually be tiring and annoying, like a big party. This brings me to another reason why introverts need alone time: We react differently to stimulation.

An Extrovert and an Introvert Go to a Party

Take, for example, two friends at a house party — one an extrovert, the other an introvert. They’re crammed into a crowded room where loud music blares from huge speakers. Everyone is practically shouting to be heard over the din. There are a dozen conversations happening simultaneously, with just as many things demanding their attention.

For the extrovert, this level of stimulation might feel just right. He sees potential rewards everywhere — an attractive stranger across the room, opportunities to deepen old relationships, and the chance to make new friends. Most importantly, tonight offers a chance to boost his social status within his friend group, especially if he plays his cards right.

So, the extrovert feels energized and excited to be at the party. In fact, he’s so motivated that he stays late into the night. He’s exhausted the next day and needs time to recover — after all, partying is hard work. But to him, the energy spent was well worth it.

Now, back to our introvert. See him over there, hunkered down in the corner? For him, the environment feels overwhelming. It’s too loud, there are too many things happening at once, and the crowd creates a dizzying buzz of activity. Sure, he wants to make friends, fit in, and be liked, but these rewards just aren’t as tantalizing to him. It feels like he would have to expend a lot of energy for something he’s only mildly interested in to begin with.

So, the introvert heads home early to watch a movie with his roommate. In his own apartment, with just one other person, the level of stimulation feels just right. He exchanges some texts with a woman he met a few weeks ago in one of his classes. Like the extrovert, he too wants friends and a romantic partner. However, he finds it too tiring to deal with the noise and socializing at a big party to make those connections.

The Dopamine Difference

Chemically, there’s a good reason the introvert in the above scenario feels overwhelmed, and it relates to a neurotransmitter called dopamine. This chemical, found in the brain, is often referred to as the “feel good” chemical because it regulates our pleasure and reward centers.

One of its roles is to make us notice potential rewards and motivate us to pursue them. For example, dopamine alerts the extrovert to the attractive stranger at the party and fuels his motivation to come up with a cheesy pick-up line.

Another important function of dopamine is reducing our cost of effort. Socializing requires energy because it involves paying attention, listening, thinking, speaking, and moderating our emotional reactions. Technically, socializing is tiring for everyone, including extroverts. However, dopamine helps make it less exhausting for them.

According to DeYoung, extroverts have a more active dopamine reward system. As a result, they can better tolerate — and often push through — the tiredness that inevitably comes with socializing. Much of the time, they don’t experience the same level of mental and physical fatigue that introverts do, thanks to dopamine.

It’s called the “introvert” hangover, not the “extrovert” hangover for a reason.

A New Theory of Introverts and Dopamine

In her 2002 book, The Introvert Advantage, Dr. Marti Olsen Laney speculated that introverts may be more sensitive to dopamine. In other words, we “quiet ones” might need less of it to feel good. Too much, she wrote, could leave us feeling overstimulated.

Science has come a long way since then. When I caught up with DeYoung again, he told me that theory had since been disproven. In fact, scientists now think it’s the opposite.

In fact, DeYoung told me, extroverts are the ones who are more sensitive to dopamine. For example, if introverts and extroverts are given the same drug that affects dopamine, extroverts tend to have a stronger response and become more motivated by similar stimuli later on.

It’s not that dopamine itself makes introverts feel overstimulated. Rather, when introverts do overstimulating things, like going to a party, they may not get as much dopamine release. Extroverts, on the other hand, may get a much bigger dopamine hit from those same activities.

“Without the sense of reward, the extra focus, and the sense of being ‘worth the effort’ that dopamine initiates,” DeYoung told me, “the introverts simply find the activities overwhelming and/or tiring instead.”

Extroverts Place More Significance on People

Finally, a study found that extroverts might simply find humans more interesting than introverts do. This finding aligns with the idea that introverts are less motivated to seek social rewards.

In this study, researchers observed a diverse group of individuals and recorded their brain’s electrical activity using an EEG. As participants were shown pictures of both objects and people, the researchers measured their brains’ P300 activity. This activity happens quickly in response to sudden changes around us and gets its name because it occurs within 300 milliseconds.

Interestingly, researchers found that extroverts showed the P300 response primarily when viewing images of faces, whereas introverts only exhibited this response after viewing objects. Essentially, extroverts’ brains became more active when looking at people.

This doesn’t mean that introverts hate people (though, admittedly, the human race can get on my nerves occasionally). Researchers still don’t fully understand introversion. However, these findings suggest that extroverts might simply place more importance on social interactions than introverts do.

So, the next time an introvert in your life needs alone time, remember that it’s not personal. Introverts need alone time because their brains are wired that way. It isn’t necessarily a reflection of how they feel about you or your relationship.

As for me, you can find me at home tonight. Preferably with the whole place to myself, that is.

Describe Something you Learned In High School

Daily writing prompt

Describe something you learned in high school.

That people were shallow. That people would peak at different times in their lives. For some, the peak was high school.

I learned that I had to try harder to be more successful than those I went to school with. To not stand still at that point in life, but to learn and grow and to unlock my fullest potential. I set my standards to be better than those I went to school with. That came to fruition.

Mostly, I learned to never look back. I closed that chapter in my life, and the best thing about it was leaving. I needed to move on in life and do more.

Introvert Memes

What Animals Make the best/worst pets?

Daily writing prompt

What animals make the best/worst pets?

Walking Speed May Predict Lifespan Better Than Blood Pressure, Study Finds

Let’s see, I’m not having any lions, badgers, monkeys, gorillas, any animals from the weasel family, skunks, pigs, chickens, and I could go on. I think you get the picture.

I’ve had cats and dogs, but I’m down to dogs now. It’s the typical Ford/Chevrolet debate over which is better. Since this is about me, the answer is dogs.

They love you, are more loyal, and learn to obey better. They get you out to walk so that you get exercise and are happy to see you, whether you’be been gone all day, or to get the mail.

Pick your own and don’t criticize mine. I like animals better than people, but that is the introvert in me. I love my dog, and still love the dogs that have been in my life.

Different News Than You Normally Read: Americans Reject Covid Shot; How Long You Gonna Live? Check Your Walking Speed; 5 Most Likely Disasters Ignored Until It’s Too Late; Biondi 86’d by Trump; Scientists Find Out about the Fight or Flight Part Of The Brain; What Americans find most (and least) immoral; Why Travel Still Sucks; Young Man Saves Great White Shark; Doordash Ripoff……and more

What’s Your Lifespan?

When It’s Too Late

The 5 Most Likely Disasters That Will Be Widely Ignored Until It’s Too Late

Americans Finally Wised Up About the Covid Jab

Big Pharma Giants Pfizer and BioNTech Forced to Shut Down COVID-19 Booster Shot Trials After Americans Refuse to Be Guinea Pigs – Yes, but 80% of them lined up like sheep and got it the first go round. There is no getting un-jabbed

They got covid 100% wrong

Repeated Covid-19 Boosters Linked to Renal Flare in IgA Nephropathy Case

Cars

Chevy Built a Corvette ZR1X to Celebrate America’s 250th Birthday

Never send a girl to do a Man’s job

President Donald Trump fired Attorney General Pam Bondi

Brain – Fight or Flight

Oxford scientists uncover how the brain resolves emotional ambiguity – discovering more about the amygdala

Morals

What Americans find most (and least) immoral.

Travel

Miami Airport Police Enforce Security, Remove 3 Women

‘Both Rows Were Completely Empty’: Woman Boards Southwest Flight From Houston To California. Then a Flight Attendant Threatens To Kick Her Off The Plane Because She Switched Seats

Sharks

Young Man Strips Down to His Undies, Saves Juvenile Great White Shark in the California Surf

Doordash Won’t Deliver Bribe

Woman Orders Food From DoorDash. The Driver Holds It Hostage Until She Adds An Extra Tip

Which Aspects do you think Make A Person Unique?

Daily writing prompt

Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?

The real answer is almost everything. From the minute you are born, you live a different life from everyone else.

So the real answer is life. It shapes everyone differently, from the experiences to how we handle them. Even Identical twins have separate lives.

Unless you could do everything at the same time with the same person and have the same response, you are different.

That is comforting to me, because I don’t want what anyone else has. My life is mine.

On a side note, have you ever looked at a group of people together? How is it that we have that many people and not a one of them is the same? Different eyes, nose, ears, chin, size, shape, coloring, and the list goes on.

I could bring God into this conversation, but I know a lot of you have different views, so I’ll just leave it at this. Go ahead and try to find 2 people who are the same, or even close.

If You Could Have Something Named After You, What Would It Be?

Daily writing prompt

If you could have something named after you, what would it be?

Either a mountain or a church. I’m most at home when I”m in the mountains, which is strange since I grew up at the beach. Tourists ruined that for me.

I long for the quiet and peacefulness, and the weather in the summer.

No one is going to remember me for anything, so a church might want them to consider eternity and make a decision to dedicate their life to God instead of ruin it like most do.

What’s Something Most People Don’t Understand?

Daily writing prompt

What’s something most people don’t understand?

Aside from the fact that there is a God, this is an easy one.

No one gives a shit about you, really. Not long after you die, people don’t even think of you, other than in a story. Two generations after you die, virtually no one remembers you or anything you did.

Think of all the people who have come and gone in your life. You don’t think about 90% of them. Who remembers every kid in elementary school? How about the kids on the street you grew up on. When did you speak with them last? Did they initiate the conversation?

Most people overestimate their importance, especially to others. Your spouse will likely even get remarried if you die.

This works for me on a lot of levels, though. I have eliminated a lot of people from my life who weren’t making it any better. That’s a thing that is best for introverts, though.

This fact has been my best friend in a lot of instances. I even got rid of Facebook because too many people wanted back in my life that I thought I’d gotten rid of.

Introvert Memes

How Often Do You Say No To Things That Would Interfere With Your Goals?

Daily writing prompt

How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?

The answer is not enough, but it’s changing.

I used to worry about other people’s feelings, and I wound up doing a lot of stuff that I didn’t want to do. I found out later that they didn’t really care and felt expendable. They would have been ok if I was there or not, so I wasted a lot of time.

Now, I’ll make exceptions for some of my family, but I say no a lot. Sometimes, my goal is that I just don’t want to do what they want to. When I found out they didn’t really care, and I wasn’t hurting anyone’s feelings, I am just fine saying no to almost anything and everything.

My goal is to avoid crowds and people whenever possible now

What’s a secret skill or ability you have or wish you had?

Daily writing prompt

What’s a secret skill or ability you have or wish you had?

One I have. Say no to a social event. My introversion is complete that way.

What do I wish I had? Be able to breathe underwater.

Introvert Memes

What is the one question you hate to be asked?

Daily writing prompt

What is one question you hate to be asked? Explain.

Smoothie King Employees Who Discriminated Against MAGA Customers Get Canned

Tell me more about yourself, or show me what you learned recently (speak in a foreign language). It is especially painful in a social icebreaker. I know they don’t really care.

I feel like I’m a trained monkey on display when I get this question. Most people get nothing really. Tell me what you’ve been up to? Do a trick for me. Entertain me with what you can do. That’s when I change the subject

If I know the person, I might share something I’ve done, but without details. Most people bore you with details that aren’t significant to the story. Only my inner circle will get to know my feelings or what I really do.

I also tend to listen more to men. Females have a hard time telling a story without adding details that aren’t relevant and distract from the story. It’s why male comedians are funnier. Listen to Richard Pryor or Robin Williams. They are always funnier than, say Amy Schumer or any of her ilk.

Introvert Memes

Better Headlines to Read Than The Usual Stuff; Smoothie King Employees Who Discriminated Against MAGA Customers Get Canned; You cannot hate the media enough; Dining Alone Increasing; 2023 Dodge Charger King Daytona – 25 Miles, Supercharged 6.2L/807 HP V-8, 1 of 300 Produced; Florida man who went missing on Valentine’s Day rescued after being stuck in ‘quick sand’ mud for days…..and more

FAFO

Phasers on Destroy

Watch: Israel Neutralizes Hezbollah Missiles With Game-Changing “Iron Beam”

Why They Went After Iran rather than waiting

Netanyahu: If We Didn’t Hit Iran Now, We Couldn’t in Future, They Were Building New Missile, Nuke Sites That Would Be ‘Immune’ from Strikes – if those MF got nukes, they’d use them. They want to die for Allah and take as many with them as possible

NFL Combine

Where Did The 40-Yard Dash Actually Come From And Why Do Players Run It At The NFL Scouting Combine? – from one of the best coaches ever

Media

You cannot hate the media enough: Links 1 for March 2nd, 2026

Dining

Solo Dining Is Exploding in America. But the ‘Me-Me-Me’ Economy Comes With a Cost… – I’ve been doing it for decades. It saves a ton of small talk

Energy

All-Hands-on-Deck Energy Policy – drill, baby, drill. The last administration did everything they could to choke off our energy. Unleashe it and it unleashes the economy

Cars

2023 Dodge Charger King Daytona

25 Miles, Supercharged 6.2L/807 HP V-8, 1 of 300 Produced

Stuck in Quicksand

Florida man who went missing on Valentine’s Day rescued after being stuck in ‘quick sand’ mud for days – can’t believe he made it

What bores you?

What bores you?

Small talk, boastful people, extroverts who can’t stop talking.

Waiting in a long line, either inside or in traffic.

Family get-togethers with people I don’t know very well. Hotel rooms, Meetings,

Celebrity opinions, reality TV shows, and almost any movie they put out today

Woke stuff

Basketball, soccer, women’s sports (except Katy Ledecky and Caitlin Clark)

Social Gatherings with icebreakers.

Democrats lying about Trump. The news. Rap music, going to plays.

Being stuck in a room full of people I don’t know.

Low-IQ women who won’t let you alone. Ex-girlfriends.

I could go on, but what bores you more than this?

What advice would you give to your teenage self?

What advice would you give to your teenage self?

Stand up for yourself and don’t try to make everybody happy, you can’t.

Not everyone is your friend, no matter what they say or do.

Don’t be afraid to hurt somebody else’s feelings if you have to sacrifice yourself.

Realize that you are introverted and that not doing a bunch of stupid stuff because the crowd wants to is not a good enough reason to do it.

Take your time and enjoy what you are doing. It will go by too quickly. You don’t have to do everything right away. Life will let you get the experience if you give it time.

I have a couple of readers (you know who you are) who give way better answers than I do because they’ve had different experiences than I have. I wonder what they will say?

Mid Week Meme Dump

11 the 80’s were better

Introvert Memes

5 – I’m not even sure about the family part

15 Things You Should Never Do to Your Introverted Partner

1. Don’t force them to socialize beyond their comfort level.

Introverts need downtime to recharge their energy. Forcing them to socialize beyond what feels comfortable for them can leave them feeling drained and exhausted. For example, if you guilt-trip your introverted partner into attending two big events in one weekend, they might end up feeling tired and stressed.

So, respect their boundaries and give them the time and space they need to recharge their energy. Maybe the two of you agree to drive separately so your partner can leave when their social battery is reaching empty. Or maybe they’ll sit this event out, but go to another one in the future that’s more important to you.

2. Don’t make them feel guilty for wanting to spend time alone.

Everyone needs downtime to recharge their energy and process their thoughts and emotions — especially introverts. When they want to be alone, it’s not about you. Introverts are simply wired differently than extroverts; you can read the science behind why introverts love alone time here.

Sometimes extroverts make off-hand comments that make introverts feel guilty: “Don’t you enjoy spending time with me?” or “I never have a problem hanging out with you, why is it so hard for you to do the same?” They don’t realize that saying these things can hurt their relationship.

If you find yourself doing this, try to understand your partner’s need for solitude and support them. If the two of you live together, you could help them create an “introvert zen zone” or sanctuary in your home — a place that they can retreat to as needed.

3. Give them space when they’re in the middle of a task.

When introverts are working on a task, like looking up information or meticulously planning the meals for the week, they tend to focus deeply. And many of them thrive when doing this deep work. Interrupting them when they’re in the middle of something can be frustrating for them. So, be patient and wait for a time when they’re more available. Or wait until they take a break and seek you out.

4. Don’t push them to be more talkative or expressive.

Introverts tend to express themselves a little differently than extroverts. For example, they might prefer writing a thoughtful text over having a face-to-face conversation about serious topics. They might be quiet in large groups, especially when they’re around people who they don’t know well (like a gathering of your extended relatives).

So, don’t push your partner to be more talkative or expressive than they’re comfortable with. Don’t say things like, “Why are you so quiet?” or “Come on, join the conversation, everyone’s waiting to hear from you.” Believe me, they’ll talk when they’re ready. Usually, this will happen around close friends and loved ones.

5. Don’t assume they’re not interested in spending time with you just because they enjoy different activities.

Introverts often prefer spending time alone or with small groups rather than with many people at once. But… they are still interested in spending time with you. Otherwise, they would not be with you!

Keep in mind that they may enjoy more low-key introvert-friendly activities, such as walking, watching a movie, or having a quiet dinner together vs. checking out the bustling new restaurant. Please don’t take their preference for more peaceful activities as a lack of interest in spending time with you.

6. Don’t criticize them for not being more outgoing.

Similar to #4, criticizing your introverted partner for not being more social can be hurtful and make them feel inadequate. Introversion is a healthy personality trait that cannot be changed. Yes, your partner can grow and learn — perhaps they need to learn to communicate better — but introversion is in their DNA, so they’ll always have a general preference for quiet and calm. Expecting someone to act against their true nature is unfair.

Instead of criticizing them, appreciate them for who they are. You fell in love with them for a reason, right?

7. Don’t assume their quietness means they’re mad or bored.

For some people, sitting quietly side by side might seem boring or uncomfortable. However, for introverts, this situation often has a different feel. Silence doesn’t necessarily signify discomfort or boredom; rather, it’s a space where introverts feel at ease. Allow your introverted partner to just be, to relax quietly in your company. It’s a meaningful way to connect and show understanding of their needs.

8. Don’t assume they’re not enjoying themselves just because they’re not showing it outwardly.

Similar to the point above, don’t assume your introverted partner is not having a good time just because they’re not expressing it as much as you may be. They just might prefer to express themselves in quieter, more subtle ways.

9. Don’t expect them to be the life of the party.

Introverts might be uncomfortable being the center of attention and entertaining others. Don’t expect them to be the life of the party or continuously make small talk, if you, say, have guests in your shared home or go away with friends for the weekend. Instead, appreciate their presence and the contributions they make in their own way. If you have a dinner party, for instance, they might be great at listening attentively to guests and making sure everyone is comfortable.

10. Don’t assume they’re not interested in making friends or meeting new people.

Just because someone is an introvert doesn’t mean they don’t want to make friends or meet new people. They just might prefer to do so in smaller settings or through shared interests rather than in large social gatherings. Introverts don’t consider everyone to be their friend (as extroverts might), and that’s okay!

11. Don’t make them feel abnormal for being an introvert.

Introversion is not weird or abnormal. Plus, 30 to 50 percent of the population may be introverted, so it’s hardly rare!

Think about the strengths your introverted partner brings to your relationship. For example, they might be excellent listeners, offering you their undivided attention when you talk about your day. They often think deeply before speaking, which means their words and advice are usually well-considered and insightful. Introverts also tend to enjoy meaningful one-on-one conversations, which can strengthen the emotional connection in your relationship. And, their love of quiet, low-key environments can create a peaceful, calming atmosphere at home.

12. Don’t guilt them into participating in activities that require a lot of small talk.

Making introverts participate in activities that require a lot of small talk can be overwhelming and exhausting for them. Allow them to join in their own way or for them to opt-out altogether. Respect their boundaries and preferences. After all, you two can find other activities that appeal to both of you. And the two of you do not have to do everything together.

13. Don’t expect them to be as spontaneous as you might be.

Introverts may not be as spontaneous as extroverts, and that’s perfectly fine. They may prefer to plan activities (they’re great planners!) and take time to thoroughly consider all the options. Don’t expect them to be more spontaneous than they’re comfortable with. That can be your department.

14. Don’t assume they’re not good communicators just because they’re introverted.

Introverts may not communicate in the same way as extroverts, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t good communicators. In fact, they can be pros at reading body language, noticing subtle changes in someone’s facial expression or tone of voice, which helps them understand unspoken feelings or concerns. Introverts are also typically good at written communication; they may craft you well-articulated texts or love letters.

15. Don’t judge them if they need to be alone after a social event.

After social events, introverts might need to be alone to recharge their batteries. So, don’t expect them to be up for another social event immediately after a big party or gathering. Or, they might not want to go out for dinner right after a day filled with meetings and socializing at work.

Again, don’t take their need for alone time as a sign of rejection or disinterest. Instead, give them this time, and know they’ll have more energy afterwards.

Introvert Memes

Introvert Memes

Best Of Introvert Meme’s – Part 6

Here are some of the posts that got a lot of clicks. Some are funny, all are true, and every introvert will look at it and say yep. I see myself in most of these

Introvert Meme’s – Good One’s Today

‘Not A Nice Lady’: New York Woman Waits 2 Hours For Martha Stewart To Sign Her Book. Then She Gets To The Front

Introvert Memes

Mid Week Meme Dump

15 Signs of High Intelligence

Sounds a lot like common sense that most don’t have. Many have these qualities yet don’t possess high IQ’s. It’s a good start, though. It sounds a lot like introverts to me.

Different Headlines: Martha Stewart Is A Cnut; How much College Bowl Games Pay; 63 Split Window Vette; Great Engine For RAM Trucks; Cities For Introverts To Avoid; What Was Up With The Fat Commercial Duriing the Sugar Bowl?;….and more

Martha Stewart Is Still a Cnut

Bowl Game Payouts

College Football’s 9 Oldest Bowl Games And How Much They Pay Out To Participants

Cars

Ram Finally Gives the Power Wagon the One Thing It Always Needed – finally, a real engine that a truck can use and needs

1963 Chevrolet Corvette Split Window Coupe

6.2L LT4 V-8, 6-Speed – a really nice split window vette. It should go for a lot

It’s OK to be fat now?

What the Hell Was That Pro-Obesity Commercial During Rose Bowl Game? – I wondered what it was about also. It’s the leading killer of people, more than smoking. Sorry fella, lose some weight. You’re trying to tell us it’s ok to commit suicide slowly and live a tough life while doing it?

German Online Streamer walks Streets of Cologne to prove it’s safe, Gets attacked

German Streamer Walks the “Safe” Streets of Cologne and Gets Stoned – Look, you let in the Muslims, you got what everyone gets that does that

Cities For Introverts to Avoid

These Are the World’s 5 Largest Megacities

Funny New Years Resolutions

Hard Truths To Carry Into 2026 Because ‘New Year, New Me’ Is A Lie – some funny stuff here

FAFO

Applebee’s Server Says Woman With Two Children Dined And Dashed On $120 Meal. Then He Sees What She Left Behind: ‘That’s Karma Right There’

How to pour a tough drink

‘What In The Probation Era’: Utah Bartender Shows What It Takes To Pour A Customer A Drink—It’s Not Easy

NY Mayor

Zohran Mamdani fans disappointed by disastrous ‘block party’ with no food or bathrooms – They’re about to be disappointed by a lot more things going wrong in the city. When it happens, bitch at the liberal white women who voted his ass in

Not the Shores of Tripoli

US-based Somali pirates are panicking and making laughable rookie mistakes…I read they have a double digit IQ. It’s starting to show

Quote Of The Day

“The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.” – Alfred Adler

Appropriate, given this is World Introvert Day.

12 Reasons to Celebrate Introverts on World Introvert Day (Jan. 2)

Why We Should Celebrate Introverts By Jenn Granneman

1. Introverts really know their stuff.

I have an introverted friend who is basically a walking encyclopedia of Celtic myth. For example, if you ask him about the hero Cú Chulainn, he can not only tell you how he died, but also what kind of chariot he drove around in. Listening to him talk, I’ve found myself thinking, “Wow, he really knows his stuff!”

That’s because many introverts love learning and adding to their vast stores of specialized knowledge. It’s no surprise they often become experts in their field.

2. Introverts are problem-solvers and idea generators.

Introverts tend to gravitate toward working alone. Rather than chatting in the break room, we’re often the ones sitting at our desks, quietly turning ideas over and over in our minds. And there’s a big benefit to this. When you’re with other people, your brain is forced to multitask. Even if you’re not talking with someone, part of your attention is occupied just by their mere presence, research suggests.

When you’re alone, you can clear your mind and focus your thoughts. All this deep, concentrated thinking can lead to novel solutions and brilliant ideas. Working alone can even lead to more ideas. “Decades of research have consistently shown that brainstorming groups think of far fewer ideas than the same number of people who work alone and later pool their ideas,” according to psychologist Keith Sawyer.

So forget the brainstorming group. Take a cue from introverts and spend some time in solitude.

3. Give up? Not yet.

Speaking of problem-solving, introverts tend to stick with problems longer — well past when everyone else has moved on to another topic or gone home for the day. Albert Einstein, the world-renowned physicist who developed the theory of relativity, was probably an introvert. He said, “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”

4. Introverts make better team players than extroverts over the long run.

Corinne Bendersky and her colleagues found that while extroverts make great first impressions, they may disappoint us over time when they’re part of a team. Their “value and reputation at work diminish over time,” explains Bendersky. “On a team, you’re expected to work hard and contribute a lot. But they’re often poor listeners, and they don’t collaborate.”

Ouch.

Introverts, on the other hand, may work harder on a team because they tend to be conscientious; they don’t want to be seen as not pulling their weight. So, while companies may initially be attracted to extroverts, bosses should remember that introverts pack a powerful (yet understated) punch.

5. Introverts are capable of incredible depth and intimacy in their relationships.

We “quiet ones” have a penchant for quality, one-on-one time and deep conversations. Instead of talking about the weather or what you did this weekend, we want to peek into your inner world. What have you learned lately? How are your ideas evolving? How are you really? When you have an introvert in your life, you may experience emotional intimacy like never before.

6. Introverts know the power of words.

As the nickname suggests, we “quiet ones” tend to listen more than we talk and think carefully before we speak. We try to choose our words thoughtfully because we understand that once said, words can’t be retracted or easily forgotten.

7. Introverts are low maintenance.

You can leave an introvert alone for hours (or even days!), and we’ll be content to do our own thing. No need to constantly text us, check in on us, or “babysit” us.

Why? Because introverts tend to be self-starters, and many of us are drawn to working quietly and steadily on our own. In fact, you’ll probably only hear from us if we have a problem we can’t fix (and believe me, we’ve tried solving it a dozen times before coming to you). Similarly, we don’t need constant praise, gold stars, and shoutouts in the company newsletter (although sure, those things are appreciated). If we’re working hard, we’re likely drawing motivation from within.

8. Introverts can be the calm in the center of the storm.

Reserved and often self-contained, introverts are known for exuding calm — even when there’s a storm raging inside us. We’re often the ones quietly creating an action plan while everyone else is stressing over the company’s latest policy change. And in this way, our methodical approach to chaos benefits everyone.

9. Introverts “get” you.

Although it may seem counterintuitive, solitude can actually help you connect better with others. Why? Because spending time alone — which introverts love — may enhance our empathy, especially for people outside our typical social group, according to research. Being alone often involves reflecting on our actions, beliefs, and experiences, which helps us develop a deeper understanding and stronger empathy for others.

10. Introverts look before they leap.

Compared to extroverts, introverts generally prefer a slower, more deliberate pace of life, and this difference stems from the way our brains are wired. Many of us hate rushing into things; whenever possible, we take time to consider all potential outcomes before making a decision. This applies to our careers, personal lives, and relationships.

For example, one study found that extroverts may jump into a new relationship more quickly than introverts. An Katrien Sodermans and her colleagues revealed that divorced extroverts were more likely than divorced introverts to remarry quickly. While this isn’t always the case, hastily made decisions — such as committing to a new relationship before fully healing from the last one — can sometimes lead to regret later on.

11. Introverts create worlds inside their heads — and help create the world we live in.

Introverts are artists, actors, musicians, entertainers, writers, and more. Famous creative introverts include Lady Gaga (she has said, “I generally really keep to myself and I am focused on my music.”), Bob Dylan, Meryl Streep, Lorde, Audrey Hepburn, and more. David Bowie is also thought to have been an introvert; experts believe he coped with his anxiety and introverted nature by developing various stage personas. Even the “King of Rock and Roll,” Elvis Presley, was described by his friends as a “loner” and “introverted.”

There are so many famous creative introverts that it’s impossible to name them all here! Just a few more examples include Steven Spielberg, Shonda Rhimes, David Letterman, Harrison Ford, Gwyneth Paltrow, Elton John, Emma Watson, and Tom Hanks… the list could go on.

12. Who runs the world? Introverts.

When we think of leadership, especially in the corporate world, words like “bold,” “overconfident,” and “selfish” may come to mind. But there’s a different kind of leader emerging: the quiet one. Today, about 40 percent of executives describe themselves as introverts, including Microsoft’s Bill Gates.

Gates believes that introverts can make great leaders because they know the value of being alone and focusing deeply. Speaking at an event in 2013, he said, “I think introverts can do quite well. If you’re clever you can learn to get the benefits of being an introvert, which might be, say, being willing to go off for a few days and think about a tough problem, read everything you can, push yourself very hard to think out on the edge of that area.”

Other introverted leaders include Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King Jr., Barack Obama, Jill Biden, Eleanor Roosevelt, Abraham Lincoln — and many others — as well as many of our greatest U.S. presidents.

Yes, introverts may be the quiet ones who eat lunch alone. They may also be the ones curled up at home with a good book, avoiding the party. But introverts are so much more than that. They are artists, visionaries, and leaders who bring quiet strength and understand the power of the inner journey.

Today — and every day — they deserve to be celebrated.

Man Appears to Kick Himself in the Crotch Using a Robot, Which Has to Be a First

So everyone celebrate together, separately, and alone. I disagree that Jill Biden and Barack Obama were leaders. They were power hungry people who shouldn’t be celebrated.

Different Headlines: It’s World Introvert Day; Scientists Identify Clock that can turn back the Cellular Clock; 69 Yenko Camaro, prototype model; Islam and Child Brides; Europe/EU/Nato Can Protect Themselves…..and more

Diet

The Methylation Switch: Scientists Identify a Diet That Can Turn Back the Cellular Clock – It makes no money for Big Pharma, and it’s not about better living through chemistry.

Why?

U.N. to Cut 2,900 Jobs, $570 Million in Budget Following U.S. Scrutiny – Kill it completely, It’s a useless organization unless you hate Israel and Jews.

Cars

Ford Recalled More Cars Than the Next 9 Brands Combined This Year

1969 Chevrolet Yenko Camaro Prototype

The First 1969 Yenko Camaro Prototype Pilot Test Car, L72 427/425 HP V-8, Featured in Super Stock and Drag Illustrated in 1969

EU/NATO/Europe

‘Who Needs the Americans?’: The Future Is a European Army – good luck with that one, your track record isn’t so good over the centuries.

Islam And Child Brides

Baghdad Bridal Market Booms With Legalization of Child Marriage – These are some sick people. Enjoy hell and your 72 virgins or whatever you think you get

Media

“Biased, Boring, and Bad”: U.S. Teens Say American News Media Is Deceptive, Fake, Misleading, and Untrustworthy – Maybe there is some hope for the future

Sort of New Years Resolutions

Stop Apologizing for Being Yourself in 2026

Happy Introverted New Years

Like my birthday, it’s just another day,

Introvert Meme’s

Are you a good judge of character?

Are you a good judge of character?

I’m an introvert. I read body language better than most people because I’m not talking. I’m listening and observing. I’m rarely trying to impress anyone, so I’m usually sizing them up as to their intentions towards me.

I’ve had people do me favors and fuck me over. I’ve studied martial arts for years and had to anticipate my opponent’s intentions.

Working for years for both the best and the worst has taught me to read people. Here’s how I dealt with Executive Egos

Most of all, I’ve been married for decades and have kids. I’ve never been more surprised by that than anything.

So yes, I’m a good judge of character because I’m patient and won’t jump to conclusions.

Once I’ve decided who you are, though, it’s hard to move me off of that position, especially if I think you are an asshole. This includes family. I can spot a fake like a Jedi.

5 Survival Tips For Introverts Attending Large Events (plus my bonus)

5 Survival Tips for Introverts Attending Big, Crowded Events

ByEllie Matama December 19, 2025

An introvert walks through a crowded event

Big events or parties can become overwhelming for us introverts, so look for little ways to maintain your energy.

I have no problem socializing with my family or close friends. I am comfortable doing so because I have known them for a long time, and I interact with them just a few at a time. There’s no having-to-get-to-know-you period.

But it’s an entirely different matter to attend big, crowded gatherings where almost everyone is a stranger (hello, holiday parties or awkward job-related networking events). Sure, for a short amount of time, I can make small talk. Of course, I need to recharge my energy afterward.

Yet, in everyday life, social interactions are required. The good news is there are plenty of things you can do to maintain your energy as an introvert when you have to attend a crowded event.

How Introverts Can Survive Crowded Events

1. Arrive early so you can pick the best spot.

One study found that about 20 percent of employees regularly arrive late to work. If you are an introvert, you can’t afford to be late for an event because people will notice your tardiness (hello, suddenly being the center of attention!). In addition, you may have to engage in unnecessary awkward interactions as you make your way to an available seat. Plus, you may have to explain your lateness later, which will further drain whatever energy you have left.

So arrive early and be prepared to stay for a while. When you arrive early, you can choose the best seat or standing spot for your needs. That way, you can still be alone among the crowd.

For example, find a seat or table on the fringes or near the back, which will enable you to move freely without having to ask people to move whenever you need to get out (i.e., escape to the bathroom). You could also choose a spot near the exit for the same purpose.

2. Go with a “human shield,” a.k.a. your favorite extrovert or outgoing introvert.

As an introvert, you may find it challenging to interact with many people at once. But some people you know may actually like doing so. Your family members, friends, or your significant other may be more outgoing — and they may thrive in crowded situations. See if they’re willing to go to the event with you. This will enable you to talk less, since they will happily do most of the talking for you.

Or, you can go to the event with a colleague who enjoys socializing. There’s no shame in using them as a “human shield” while representing your company or department. While they schmooze with everyone, you can thoughtfully listen and pick up points for discussion later on (i.e., at the next company meeting).

And, speaking of talking less…

3. Embrace your listening skills.

Remember: As an introvert, listening is one of your superpowers. We speak about 125 to 175 words a minute, but we’re able to listen to about 450 words a minute. Therefore, you’ll learn more by listening than by talking a lot. Also, when you aren’t talking, you can pay more attention to people’s body language, which can offer more information about their state of mind than what they actually say.

Plus, people feel understood and cared for when someone listens to them. So you may make a great first impression just by listening!

Once you’ve absorbed everything they’ve said, take the time to process it before adding your thoughts. That way, you’ll have something valuable to say based on all your gathered information.

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

4. Look for small groups talking about topics you care about.

Even at the most crowded events, small groups tend to form because people with similar interests gravitate toward one another. That’s great news for introverts, as you’ll feel more at home if the topic is one you’re passionate about. Even if the group is talking about something similar to a topic you want to bring up, now’s your chance to change the subject to that one instead. And, when interacting in a small group, you won’t get socially burned out as quickly.

5. Block out the noise.

As an introvert, there may be times when you can’t take all the noise, small talk, or all the people anymore. But you also can’t leave the event… yet. In that case, you need a way to block out the noise.

You can do this in many ways: Listen to music or an audiobook (or just put on your earbuds to make it look like you’re listening to something or on a call; they’ll still help tune out some of the noise!); make an actual call; or excuse yourself to “step outside for a moment.” If you’re worried that these things will make you seem aloof or antisocial, remember that most people aren’t looking at you, anyway, and won’t even notice.

Yes, I know, having to attend crowded events and make small talk can be a nightmare for introverts. However, the more prepared you are, the more you’ll preserve your energy.

Here’s my bonus: say no and don’t go. You won’t miss much, and your life will be better for it

Introvert Meme’s

Name your top three pet peeves.

Name your top three pet peeves.

Unless you are new here, you know I’m an introvert. That puts small talk at the top of the list. It’s usually meaningless and content free. It’s irritating to listen to. Talk to me about something deep that stirs my intelligence and/or emotions, or has great content, then I’ll want to engage.

Next, big crowds. I usually avoid it unless it’s impossible. Sometimes a small crowd is big if they are people I don’t want to be around (like family gatherings).

I look for the first excuse to not go, or leave early if I have to. If I’m stuck in an auditorium, I’m by the exit so I can leave.

Finally, internet arguments. You can be the top expert in a field, write a thoughtful piece that is fully documented with facts, and the first comment is: bullshit. You can say almost anything, and people will find a way to argue about it. See a few posts below on commenting.

Regarding Commenting

First of all, I love the comments. Some of you guys are very interesting and funny. I write to different groups, including introverts, the intelligentsia, political individuals, car people, and others. I’m getting to know you all more closely from the stuff you write.

I even connected with one reader who knew Denny from Grouchy Old Cripple, but neither of us knew it until I started AOTW in Denny’s honor.

I wrote about Stupid Things Smart People Do a long time ago. One of them is arguing on the internet.

I’m likely to post about anything these days. A lot of posts get tumbleweeds for comments. I think I’m all clever, and then crickets.

Occasionally, I’ll be content-free in my head and post something meaningless, and it’s a barrage of comments, like What’s it like to have an extremely high IQ.

Once in a while, I get off the wall comments that are out of left field. I saw this meme and thought about it.

I can write some offensive stuff and know it. Hell, I do it on purpose sometimes. I don’t care if you disagree with me, but keep it civil when you write back. My favorite are people who outthink me and write clever stuff.

I also ask questions that are set up by WordPress and answer them as honestly as I can. I love it when people answer them also (Bocopro is a great writer)

I have it set up to approve all comments, and if it gets too out of hand, I’m not going to let it on the page. It just starts a fight I don’t want to see happen and piss off others. If it’s spicy and will start a discussion, I’ll let it go. I also am not going to let people post their blogs that have nothing to do with my post. They have their own blog, and I read it there.

All I ask is that you be civil. I know that the people on the left hate my ass by now, but I don’t care. They aren’t smart and write childish things. I brush that off and move along, which is what they should have done to begin with.

So keep up the commentary. Many of you are better writers than I am. I enjoy reading your stuff.

Introvert Meme’s

7 This one reminds me of my college girlfriend

23 Little Things Introverts Are Thankful for Anytime of the Year

“Waking up early or staying up late, when no one else is around. Peace. Silence. Bliss.”

Turkey. Pumpkin pie. Awkwardly chatting with Great Aunt Gladys. If you live in the U.S., you’re probably celebrating Thanksgiving. Inevitably, at some point, you’ll be asked to name something you’re thankful for. With that spirit in mind, here are 23 things introverts are generally thankful for — anytime of the year. What would you add to this list?

1. Coming home and finding the house unexpectedly empty. There’s nothing better than sneaking in a few hours (or even minutes) of unexpected solitude. Time to relax. Time to decompress. No obligatory, “How was your day?” Just space and freedom to be yourself. Ahhhh…

2. When your friend cancels on you at the last minute, and you kind of wanted to stay home anyway. This is just like #1: unexpected solitude.

3. Getting a Saturday afternoon to yourself. Perhaps even better than a few moments of unexpected solitude is knowing that you have hours and hours of alone time ahead of you.

4. Finding out that the party/event/meeting is ending earlier than you thought. Sure, introverts can socialize and even be leaders in the workplace. But for many of us, those things don’t come naturally. “Peopling” is a skill we’ve had to learn — kind of like learning a foreign language. And we all know how mentally exhausting it can be to speak a language you’re not entirely comfortable with. Any time spent away from the group (and in our natural inward “habitat”) is something we’re thankful for.

5. Discovering a good book that you can’t put down. Books (along with movies, music, and art) transport introverts to the place we love the most: the energizing world of ideas and imagination.

6. Having a meaningful conversation. How are you a different person today than you were five years ago? What’s on your mind lately? Do aliens exist? In our fast-paced society that values polite chitchat over substance, deep conversations don’t happen often. Yet it’s these meaningful interactions that nourish introverts and provide us with an antidote to social burnout. Something to be thankful for, indeed.

7. Meeting a fellow introvert who “gets” it. Or an extrovert who “gets” it by respecting your need for space and solitude. Feeling understood by another human being is about as magical as it gets.

8. When there’s a dog or cat at the party. Saved! (From small talk with humans, that is.)

9. Headphones. Pop on a pair when you’re in a public space — like a bus, airplane, coffee shop, or at your desk — and you signal to others that you’re not in the mood to chat. Hallelujah!

10. Arriving on your own to a party so you can leave whenever you want. For introverts, hell is being trapped somewhere surrounded by noise and people. Having an escape mechanism is key.

11. When someone says, “How are you?” and really means it. See #6.

12. When you don’t have to make awkward small talk. For some reason, people find silence awkward. So we strike up conversations about the weather with strangers in elevators. Or we erupt with a cheery, “How’s it going?” when we pass someone we barely know in the hallway at work. When introverts can get through the day with minimal chitchat, we’re thankful.

13. Waking up early or staying up late, when no one else is around. Peace. Silence. Bliss.

14. Downtime after a busy day. Socializing isn’t the only thing that drains introverts. Any kind of incoming stimulation, such as noise, time pressure, or activity, gets tiring. After a busy day, when we don’t have to do one more thing, we’re thankful.

15. A weekend with no social plans. But that doesn’t mean we won’t be doing anything. We’ll make our own plans. Introvert plans. Plans to read in bed. To binge watch our favorite show. To lounge around the house.

16. Self-checkout lanes, drive-throughs, food delivery, and online shopping. No, introverts don’t hate people. But we do try to minimize our “people” intake, because each interaction drains our limited social energy — especially the kind of surface-level interactions that usually take place in restaurants and stores.

17. Having to go to a store but unexpectedly finding it not busy. If you can’t do #16, this is the next best thing.

18. Time to think before responding. Many introverts struggle with word retrieval, because our brains may rely more on long-term memory than short-term memory (extroverts do the opposite). For this reason, we may have a hard time putting our thoughts into words, especially when we’re put on the spot in a meeting, on a first date, or when called on in class. We’re thankful for people who give us a few pressure-free moments to collect our thoughts before demanding an answer.

19. Texting. Similar to #18, introverts tend to feel more comfortable expressing themselves in writing than speaking. That’s because writing uses different pathways in the brain, which seem to flow more fluently for introverts. We’re thankful for every time we can send a text message instead of making a phone call.

20. Public spaces that are actually quiet. When parks, restaurants, coffee shops, bars, buses, and trains are chill, we’re thankful.

21. When you get to do your thing, uninterrupted. Alone time isn’t just about being alone. For many introverts, it’s a way to reconnect with our passions, hobbies, and artistic pursuits. It’s when we do deep, concentrated work. When our alone time is fragmented by other obligations (or interruptions from loved ones), introverts can get stressed. A long stretch of unbroken time to do our thing is something we’re immensely thankful for.

22. Your favorite beverage, a cozy blanket, and your favorite show. Alone.

23. “Me” time. Doing whatever relaxes you, energizes you, and brings you joy.

Introvert Meme’s

Introvert Thanksgiving Nightmare

Introverts hate being put on the spot, icebreakers, and networking events. My Brother in law (who I nicknamed Flounder from Animal House) did this to me on one of the 2 worst Thanksgivings I’ve had. He was at the other one also. I mumbled some answer when I should have just passed and felt awkward the whole meal.

You Get More Introverted With Age, According to Science

We all become more introverted as we get older, even the most extroverted among us. Of course we do

I’m a classic introvert, but in my teens and twenties, it was normal for me to spend almost every weekend with friends. Now, in my thirties, the perfect weekend is one with zero social plans.

And I’m not the only one socializing less these days. My extroverted friend, for example, used to run through her entire contact list, calling friends whenever she was alone in the car. She told me she hated the quiet, the emptiness, because being alone felt boring.

You know, for the whole 10–15 minutes it took to drive to the grocery store. Oh, the horror.

These days, I can rarely get her out for brunch or coffee. She’s content spending most nights at home with her husband and two kids. And I haven’t gotten one of her infamous calls in years.

So, what gives? Do we get more introverted as we get older?

Probably, says Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking — and this is actually a good thing. Let me explain.

Why We Become More Introverted With Age

In a post on Quiet Revolution, Susan Cain confirmed my suspicions: We tend to act more introverted as we get older. Psychologists call this “intrinsic maturation.” It means our personalities become more balanced, “like a kind of fine wine that mellows with age,” writes Cain.

Research also shows that our personalities do indeed change over time — and usually for the better. For instance, we become more emotionally stable, agreeable, and conscientious as we grow, with the largest change in agreeableness happening during our thirties and continuing to improve into our sixties. “Agreeableness” is one of the traits measured by the Big Five personality scale, and people high in this trait are warm, friendly, and optimistic.

We also become quieter and more self-contained, needing less “people time” and excitement to feel a sense of happiness.

Psychologists have observed intrinsic maturation in people worldwide, from Germany to the UK, Spain, the Czech Republic, and Turkey. And it’s not just humans; they’ve observed it in chimps and monkeys, too.

This shift is why we slow down as we get older and begin enjoying a quieter, calmer life — and yes, it happens to both introverts and extroverts.

Becoming More Introverted Is a Good Thing

From an evolutionary standpoint, becoming more introverted as we age makes sense — and it’s probably a good thing.

“High levels of extroversion probably help with mating, which is why most of us are at our most sociable during our teenage and young adult years,” writes Susan Cain.

In other words, being more extroverted when you’re young might help you form important social connections and, ultimately, find a life partner. (Cue the flashbacks to awkward high school dances and “welcome week” in college.)

Then, at least in theory, by the time we reach our 30s, we’ve committed to a life path and a long-term relationship. We may have kids, a job, a spouse, and a mortgage — our lives are stable. So it becomes less important to constantly branch out in new directions and meet new people.

(Note that I said “in theory.” In my 30s, I still don’t have kids, a mortgage, or a wedding ring. These days, we have the luxury of not following evolution’s “script.”)

“If the task of the first half of life is to put yourself out there, the task of the second half is to make sense of where you’ve been,” explains Cain.

During the married-with-children years, think of how difficult it would be to raise a family and nurture close relationships if you were constantly popping into the next party. Even if you don’t marry or have kids, it would be hard to focus on your career, health, and life goals if you were always hanging out with friends like you did in your teens and twenties.

Once an Introvert, Always an Introvert

But there’s a catch: Our personalities only change so much.

In my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts, I like to say that our personalities may evolve, but our temperaments remain constant.

This means that if you’re an introvert, you’ll always be an introvert, even at 90. And if you’re an extrovert — though you may slow down with age — you’ll always be an extrovert.

I’m talking big-picture here: who you are at your core.

Research supports this idea. In 2004, Harvard psychologists Jerome Kagan and Nancy Snidman studied individuals from infancy into adulthood. In one study, they exposed babies to unfamiliar stimuli and recorded their reactions. Some babies got upset, crying and flailing their arms and legs; these were labeled “highly reactive” to their environment.

Other babies remained calm around the new stimuli; they were the “low-reactive” ones.

When Kagan and Snidman checked in with these individuals later, they found that the “highly reactive” babies often grew up to be more cautious and reserved, while the “low-reactive” babies tended to stay sociable and daring as adults.

The bottom line? Our core temperament — whether cautious or sociable, introverted or extroverted — doesn’t change dramatically with age.

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

An Example: Your High School Reunion

Consider, for instance, your high school reunion.

Let’s say you were very introverted in high school — perhaps the third-most introverted person in your graduating class. Over the years, you’ve grown more confident, agreeable, and comfortable in your own skin, but you’ve also become a bit more introverted. If you enjoyed hanging out with friends once a week in high school, maybe now in your thirties, you’re content with seeing them only once a month.

At your ten-year high school reunion, you notice everyone has slowed down a bit, enjoying a calmer, more stable life. But those who were very extroverted in high school are still much more extroverted than you.

You’re still approximately the third-most introverted person in your class — but now the whole group has shifted slightly toward the introverted side.

And that’s not a bad thing. In fact, it might be exactly what we need to flourish as adults. If there’s one thing we introverts understand, it’s the deep satisfaction of a quiet life.

Serial Urinator Kicked Out Of Baylor After Filming Himself Peeing On The Football Field And Other Landmarks

My take, I just had my 50th high school reunion. I never even considered going. I enjoyed it immensely.

Different Headlines: Enhanced Games, How Fast Can They Run On Drugs?;

Enhanced Games

Enhanced Games Suffers Major Legal Setback; $800 Million Lawsuit Dismissed By Judge – We get to see how fast and strong they are on drugs. People will watch that.

How Brutal Communism is

Holodomor Memorial Day – Killing fields, Stalin’s purges, the truth about Socialism the left is trying to hide. It just shows how stupid the liberal women in NY were to vote in their own demise.

Miss Universe

Miss Jamaica Recovering After Faceplanting Off Stage, Being Carted Away On Stretcher During Miss Universe Pageant – She’s got some good ganga mon.

Piss off

Bartenders

‘Shut Up And Drink Your Beer’: Texas Bartender Shares The Single Worst Thing You Can Tell A Bartender—Especially If You’re A Regular – Obviously an introvert. Small talk sucks.

Basketball

9 Richest Head Coaches In College Basketball – John Wooden is turning over in his grave

Nature

12-Foot Burmese Python Caught In SW Florida Makes Kaa From ‘The Jungle Book’ Look Like A Tiny Worm – Big ass snake

“He Was Running for His Life”: 11 Injured When Grizzly Attacks School Children, Teachers

Football

The 11 College Football Teams That Have Won The Most Conference Championships

Rice University Asks For Trouble With Dangerous (And Awesome) Student Beer Promotion – This won’t turn out well. Hold my beer.

Vaccines

Pfizer’s Promising mRNA Flu Shot vs. Americans’ Bad Memories – Don’t be a dumbass, stay away from this, very far away.

Climate Hoax (COP30)

US & Qatar Force EU Climate Policy U-Turn – End of the ESG Era? – ‘The beginning of the end of European climate socialism’ – The damage is done in the EU, though. They are now behind the rest of the world in energy for a lie.

Fraud

Lindsey Halligan reveals a ton of new evidence relating to Letitia James’s alleged mortgage fraud… – NBADJT, all the cases were attempts to get him not to run and to cause interference. He swatted them away and now all the prosecutors are in legal hot water.

Rapper Gets 14 Years in Prison for Funneling Millions of Dollars in Illegal Campaign Contributions to Obama in 2012 – so Obama cheated, who’s shocked?

Soros

Musk Calls Out Soros’ Radical Son: ‘Can You Stop Trying to Destroy Civilization?’ – Hungary banned them, why can’t we?

5th Column

127 Democrats Refuse to Vote to Condemn ‘Horrors of Socialism’ – America is the only country that can destroy America, and some are trying hard.

Minnesota Somalis Are Funding Terrorists – get rid of traitors

Sec. Marco Rubio makes profoundly important statement and policy move concerning the threat to the West that mass-Migration is causing

Liberal Women Role Play as Illegal Immigrants and Teach Volunteers How to Resist ICE – liberal white women, the scourge of the country right now.

Climate Scam

Hurricane season has just 2 weeks remaining, but so far, for the first time in a decade:
ZERO hurricanes made US landfall
ZERO Gulf hurricanes pic.twitter.com/ljt5TGr7UO
— Patrick De Haan (@GasBuddyGuy) November 18, 2025

so another lie debunked. I wonder what emergency scare they’ll come up now that the climate hoax is falling apart?

Google Spying on you

IMPORTANT message for everyone using Gmail.
You have been automatically OPTED IN to allow Gmail to access all your private messages & attachments to train AI models.
You have to manually turn off Smart Features in the Setting menu in TWO locations.

Retweet so every is aware. pic.twitter.com/54FKcr4jO2
— Dave Jones (@eevblog) November 19, 2025

Gmail is spying on you, like Google hasn’t been for years anyway.

Masculinity

Actor Anthony Mackie: “We’ve Been Living Through Death of American Male for Twenty Years” – The world needs men, real men who act like men. The downfall started with Metrosexuals, or as I call them, pussies. Act like men. If woke women don’t want that, they can have the weak beta males who will disappoint them the rest of their lives, or until they breakup, whichever comes first.

Air Travel (sucks)

FAA Reports 400% Surge of In-Flight Outbursts, DoT Launches Civility Campaign – why I hate traveling. People being assholes

Cars

Revology 1969 Boss 429 Mustang Is a Frankensteinian Work of Art – one of the best Mustangs (not counting specials like Rousch or Shelby). My ex-brother-in-law was able to burn rubber in 4th gear in his. He had to put in a slower transmission as the speed scared him so much.

Christmas Shooting In Concord NC

Almost 30K kids skipped school because they were illegals and got tipped off in next door Charlotte. Criminals are not going to be afraid of those fat donut eating girl cops. No wonder they picked this place to strike.

Insurance

Obamacare Is a Disaster, Just as Expected – not affordable, not any thing they promised and you didn’t get to keep your doctor or your existing plan. One of the biggest lies ever told.

What’s your favorite month of the year? Why?

What’s your favorite month of the year? Why?

January, actually December 26th. That’s when the world goes back to normal, and they stop playing all the same songs I’ve been hearing in the stores since October.

You can have too much of a good thing, and that is what they’ve done to Christmas, overdone it. I’m for the real meaning of our Savior being born, but people who don’t even care about that go overboard. It started in September with the Christmas decorations at the Home Improvement stores, and they are already up. Thanksgiving is next week.

It’s hard for introverts to process all the attention. We also know that for most people, it is fake. They act all happy and joyful, then get in their cars and cut you off and give you the finger.

All the production around it excites some, but drains introverted people. By the time we get to Christmas, our social battery is dead, and it’s hard to function. Look at the post a few below this on introvert hangovers, and that is what I’m talking about.

The holiday season is tough for some. Fake joy doesn’t make up for it. Too many people takes it out of me and I can’t wait for it to be over.

Feeling Drained? Here Are 12 Signs You Have an Introvert Hangover

An introvert hangover can leave you feeling exhausted, making you want nothing more than to escape to a quiet place alone.

Does this sound familiar?

You’ve spent the whole day with your friends or family. You’ve had a great time eating, playing games, and catching up. But now, you’re so exhausted you can barely see straight, while everyone else seems as energetic as ever. In fact, they’re already setting up the next game as you’re wondering how you can slip out the door.

The next day, after the event is over, is no better. You might have a headache, and your body may feel sore and drained, almost like the onset of the flu. You’re tired — so very tired.

If this resonates with you, you might be experiencing something we call an “introvert hangover.”

What Is the Introvert Hangover?

Introvert, Dear writer Shawna Courter coined the term “introvert hangover” in this article to describe the exhaustion she felt after celebrating Christmas with her in-laws. She writes:

“An introvert hangover is a pretty terrible thing to experience. It starts with an actual physical reaction to overstimulation. Your ears might ring, your eyes start to blur, and you feel like you’re going to hyperventilate. Maybe your palms sweat. And then your mind feels like it kind of shuts down, building barriers around itself as if you had been driving on a wide open road, and now you’re suddenly driving in a narrow tunnel. All you want is to be at home, alone, where it’s quiet.”

Yes, the introvert hangover is real. It’s a funny term that describes the serious social burnout many introverts experience, marked by significant mental and physical fatigue.

Here are 12 signs that you might have an introvert hangover, which I discuss in more detail in my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts. You don’t need to experience all these symptoms to have one, and your symptoms might vary.

Signs of an Introvert Hangover

1. Every little thing gets on your nerves.

When you have an introvert hangover, even small annoyances can overwhelm you. Normally, you might brush off a sarcastic comment from your partner or stay calm when you misplace your keys — but not in this state. An introvert hangover can make it feel as though your head is so full it might burst, leaving no room for even the smallest extra bit of information. Because you’re so tired, you may find it hard to control your emotions.

2. You struggle to make decisions.

Even small decisions become difficult. Paper or plastic? Pumpkin pie or cherry? Normally, these choices wouldn’t be hard, but when you have an introvert hangover, your brain is so tired that it doesn’t function properly. For bigger issues, you might find yourself obsessively thinking about the situation to the point of frustration. You’re searching for that one piece of information that will show the right way forward, but because you’re so exhausted, your mind can’t focus enough to find it.

3. You can’t think clearly.

Similar to the previous point, you’re so tired that it feels like your mind is processing everything in slow motion. You might struggle to recall details of things you should easily know, like your daily schedule, where you left your phone, or even common passwords.

4. Your speech changes.

You might speak slower, with unusually long pauses between your words. Sometimes, you might use words that are close to what you mean but not quite right — for instance, “dessert” becomes “candy” and “where’s my coat” becomes just a vague gesture. You might even seem a bit intoxicated, even if you haven’t had much or any alcohol. You might slur your words together, mispronounce them, or both.

5. You feel physically unwell.

Some introverts report experiencing headaches, muscle aches, upset stomachs, or other physical symptoms.

6. You’re tired.

Like, really tired. It feels like you’ve just finished an intense workout at the gym. If someone offered you a quiet spot to nap, you’d accept it immediately. After the social event, you find yourself collapsing on the couch, skipping your usual evening routine, or heading straight to bed.

7. You’re zoning out.

You find it hard to focus. Someone might be speaking, but you’re not absorbing their words. Your expression may appear blank, sad, or even angry, but you’re not necessarily upset. Your mind is simply wandering, perhaps lost in thought or daydreaming.

8. You feel anxious.

For some, an introvert hangover can intensify their anxiety. In social situations, they might feel particularly nervous, worried about how others perceive them and concerned they might say or do the wrong thing. They may also find themselves overthinking a particular decision, unable to escape an anxious thought spiral due to their fatigue.

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

9. You feel depressed.

An introvert hangover can also trigger feelings of depression. You might find yourself overwhelmed by pessimism and cynicism, questioning past decisions, and experiencing dark thoughts. Everything in life may seem bleak or not okay.

10. You’re not acting like yourself.

You might be quieter or not as cheerful as usual. Something seems off, and those close to you are likely to pick up on it.

11. You can’t handle small talk anymore.

When you’re experiencing an introvert hangover at a social event, you might find it hard to keep up with conversations. You’ve run out of small talk. Your mind is just too tired to think of anything polite or interesting to say.

12. You have an intense desire to be alone.

When you’re dealing with an introvert hangover, all you crave is solitude. Whether it’s sneaking off to the bathroom during a social gathering or cozying up in your pajamas afterward, you just need some time for yourself. For introverts, there’s nothing quite like the comfort of being alone after a hectic day or social gathering.

What Causes an Introvert Hangover?

Research shows that everyone eventually gets tired from socializing, including extroverts. Socializing requires energy, and after a while, everyone reaches their limit. However, introverts experience social burnout more quickly and intensely.

Why is this the case? Introverts are generally more sensitive to noise and other forms of stimulation compared to extroverts. Their dopamine systems are less active, meaning that an overload of dopamine — the “feel good” neurotransmitter — can leave them feeling tired and overstimulated. In contrast, extroverts often feel energized by the same levels of dopamine, which can help them push past social fatigue.

To learn more about why introverts need time alone and why they get easily drained from socializing, click here.

The Cure for an Introvert Hangover

The best way to recover from an introvert hangover is to spend time alone in a peaceful, quiet environment. Do your favorite self-care activities or hobbies — anything that helps uplift your mood and energy. For introverts, solitude is as essential as food and water.

If you can’t be completely alone, look for small ways to take a break. You could listen to soothing music with headphones, go for a walk, or find a quiet corner to read. Even short breaks can make a difference.

As introverts, we might feel pressured to fit into a society that often values extroverted behavior. You might worry that prioritizing your needs could inconvenience others or hurt their feelings. This pressure can lead you to hide or deny what you really need, causing more stress.

Remember that your needs as an introvert are valid. It’s perfectly okay to leave a party early or to spend time alone. Your needs are real and deserve respect.

‘I Would Die’: Florida Woman Borrows Her Dad’s Shirt, Starts Getting Compliments From ‘Old Men.’ Then She Reads The Back Of It

The holiday season is here. It’s the worst 2 months of the year for me. What is telling is that as soon as the presents are opened, people go right back to the other 10 months of the year.

I cringed when I saw the decorations for sale in September, and they started going up 50 days before Christmas near me. My energy started draining on the spot

What book are you reading right now?

What book are you reading right now?

The Hobbit, American gangster, and other tales of New York, and the Bible. It’s the start of the Lord of the Rings series I’ve wanted to read.

It keeps your mind sharp. I’ve noticed a pattern between people who are smarter and more interesting and those who read.

I just finished Martin Luther by Eric Metaxis.

I always have more than one book going

Different Headline: 5 Descendents of Di Vinci Did Extrordinary Things; Diet Coke Addiction Worse Than Imagined; Cadillac or Rolls Royce For The Same Price?; Marrying An AI Husband; Master Internet Trolling…..and more

Food Addiction

‘As A Former Diet Coke Aholic, It Is So Hard To Give It Up’: Delta Flight Attendant Says First-Class Passenger Asked For Strange Request. So She Complied—And Got $35 For It – That stuff is poison

Dad Humor

Introverts

‘Do They Know Introverts Exist???’: New York Man Chooses To Enjoy His Lunch Alone Instead Of With Co-Workers. He Didn’t Expect It To Cost Him His Job – What a crappy company

Covid PPP Fraud

Democrat Ex-Lawmaker Who Heckled Trump Convicted in Covid Fraud Scheme – Stupid is as stupid does. Can’t keep his trap shut

Cars

Would You Rather Spend Over $400K on a Cadillac Celestiq or a Rolls-Royce Ghost? – I wouldn’t spend $8 on a Cadilac.

Internet Master Trolling.

Dana Perino Lets Commiela Harris Know What Game She Was Really Playing Against Trump (Not ‘3-D Chess’) – I wonder if Kamala even knew she got trolled

Artificial Intelligence

People Are Now Having AI “Children” With Their AI Partners – It’s best this way. People like this don’t need to bring real children into the world

Euginics

Silicon Valley Elites Pump Cash into Banned Genetically Modified Babies Research

Didn’t they try this in the 1930’s in Germany? Stop trying to play God.

Racism

Michelle Obama’s Bigoted Book Tour – She lived the privileged life while lying, whining and hating white people. She drank top shelf booze and wasted millions of taxpayer money on her vacations that she took friends and family on. What and ungrateful and bigoted bitch. She picked the most dumbassed topic to harp on. No one really cares about her, nor do they care about her looks.

DNA

Five Men Spent Their Lives Doing Extraordinary Things… Turns Out They Were Da Vinci’s Secret Descendants… – It was the Y Chromosome passed down.

Marrying an AI Husband

Bride weds AI-groom she created using ChatGPT in dual real-life and virtual reality ceremony – psycho-chicks. Men are better off if she stays with the fake husband instead of ruining the life of a real life man.

Cars

Locked Out: How Big Auto Could Destroy the Used-Car Market – The stakes are enormous: 273,000 repair shops, 900,000 technicians, and 293 million vehicles could be affected.

Islam

The European Tragedy Comes to America – It’s the same war that’s been fought since 610. They ruin every country they invade, either by immigration or war.

Covid and Wuhan Labs

U.S. Spy Agencies Had Ties to Wuhan Scientists Years before 2020 Covid Pandemic Began

What was your favorite subject in school?

What was your favorite subject in school?

I’d like to say that I was dedicated to a job goal in school, but I just tried to get good grades, like it or not. I was only interested in either getting into college or getting a job, but there wasn’t any subject that blew wind up my skirt.

I was small and the youngest kid in my class due to the birthday cut off, but I enjoyed PE class because it was a break from studying. It’s tough being the youngest and usually the smallest. Once I caught up to the other kids, I held my own and even kept up with the team athletes at the end.

It was the break from the monotony of class that made me enjoy it.

The valedictorian and salutatorian were in my chemistry class. They ruined the curve for everyone. The kids always messed with their experiments, and they could never figure out why they didn’t get the results that they were supposed to, although their write ups got them the A’s they strove for. Neither went anywhere in life.

The real smartest kid placed 3rd behind these two shrimp girls because he took weightlifting in PE and got a B, his only one ever. I give him credit for sticking his neck out in life. Straight A’s got a lot of people nowhere, but life lessons did.

Which brings me to my greatest learning in school. I had to try harder in everything. I was so young that social things, intuitive to others, were a hard learned lesson for me. It was tenacity over talent in everything. If I’d known that I was an introvert, I could have used my observation skills even more. What I did was just intuition back then.

So while it was the toughest subject for me, life was the class I studied the most. I had to figure everything out without someone to show me how. Like the Bob Seger song, I was working on mysteries without any clues. It was the best lesson I learned.

I wound up playing Tennis for my college, the only sport I made the team on. I was president of my fraternity and dated a cheerleader. None of that really mattered to me then. I expected it after all that I’d been through. I worked hard enough to get the job that opened doors to people and travel, and the success I’d defined for myself.

As it turns out, my 50th reunion was last weekend. I didn’t go because I never related to the other kids, or wanted to. They were just people I learned from, mostly what not to do or how to act.

At high school graduation, I vowed that I’d be more successful by any measurement. A few became actors, pro sports athletes, or a doctors here and there. As I’d come across their stories before I ditched Facebook, the pinnacle of life was high school for them. It was all downhill from there. I was just starting, but the seeds of motivation to succeed were planted and fertilized. I’d met my goal set way back in high school.

Life was the best class. It had nothing to do with the classroom.

I will say that my German teacher was hot and not that much older than me. Why didn’t they throw a high schooler a break like they do now?

13 Things Introverts Find ‘Horrifying’

1. When people call — and a text or email would have been more than sufficient.

As an introvert, I am frightened by people who call when a text or email would be more than sufficient. There is a certain anxiety that comes with an open-ended conversation, since phone conversations are expected to take longer than the 10 seconds necessary to transmit the information. This anxiety is compounded by the lack of visual cues during a phone call that are vital to us introverts, but are often summarily ignored by extroverts.

–Steve

2. Not being able to exit an intense social setting.

The thing that horrifies me the most is not being able to exit an intense social setting. If I am somewhere and don’t have an out, my stress level skyrockets. I need to know that I have a way to step out or leave so I can recharge.

–Lou

3. Networking events. Period.

Networking events are made for extroverts who gain energy by being around people and engaging with them. However, for most introverts, networking events are generally uncomfortable and terrifying — we find it hard to be open and let strangers into our lives. We are atrocious at small talk, and it is challenging to establish rapport with new people. For us, networking is definitely out of our comfort zone and ranks as one the top scary things for introverts.

–Albert

4. Being put on the spot.

My biggest fear is of being put on the spot to say something in a group or public setting when I’m not prepared. That feeling of all eyes turning to me to say something off-the-cuff really makes me uncomfortable!

–Jen

5. Two words that strike intense fear into my heart are “overnight stay.”

I may be an introvert, but I love people. I can have a great time seeing friends and family and love spending time together over a few drinks and board games. But if we need to stay overnight? That’s when anxiety sets in. Keeping up the social energy in the morning, not knowing when we’ll be able to duck out and find some respite — these thoughts embed themselves into the back of my mind, which makes socializing that much harder.

–Mike

6. First dates terrify me.

First dates terrify me because of my aversion to small talk and awkward silences. I can talk to someone online, no problem, but face-to-face? I make very weird small talk because I’m nervous. The terror is, I see the date and he’s not who I’m interested in when I meet him in person. Then I just want to leave as quickly as possible, so the small talk becomes even more painful. I just sit there, in anxious terror, and blurt out the first thing that comes into my head, whether it’s appropriate or not.

Prime example: I went out on a one-date-wonder a few years ago. We met for lunch, he didn’t appeal to me in person, awkward silence ensued. The only thing I thought to say was: “Armadillos are the only other mammal that contract leprosy from humans.” (I learned that factoid in fifth grade and who would have thought it’d stick with me 35 years later?!) He looked at me in horror and I fled. I never heard from him again — whew!

–Lisa

7. Public speaking scares me to death.

Any sort of public speaking scares me to death as someone who is basically a career introvert. It doesn’t matter if I’m leading a meeting of three participants or speaking to a larger audience, the thought of being the center of attention in any way, shape, or form truly terrifies me. It’s kind of like a fear of heights — you don’t understand it truly unless you suffer from it. All of the workarounds don’t seem to work, and I just manage it by avoiding it as much as possible.

–David

8. Getting trapped in a social commitment that goes on for hours.

There’s nothing more frightening than getting trapped in a social commitment that can prolong for hours (like public speaking or large parties). I prefer shorter engagements when my energy levels are higher, but once things drag on, it becomes impossible to focus and incredibly uncomfortable!

–Sara

9. Having roommates — thus having to be social all the time — is an introvert’s worst nightmare.

The one thing that scares me a lot is living with my friends permanently. While I enjoy socializing, after a while, I am mentally drained and need time to recharge. If I had to live with friends, I’d feel obligated to be social all the time and that would be mentally stressful for me as an introvert because I wouldn’t have “space” to get away from them. You’re stuck living in the same place, and I feel that would be pretty unbearable.

–Roger

10. My biggest fear is being embarrassed.

As an introvert who avoids social interaction at nearly all costs, my biggest fear is being embarrassed. When I’m in public, I usually become solely focused on how I look to other people, what others think of me, and the assumptions they make of me. In the past, it’s affected everything from the way that I walk to the comments I make to even the tone of my voice. It can be kind of brutal, but it’s something I’ve learned to deal with. Staying out of the public eye seems to help with that.

–Mike

11. I feel my introversion can scare off a romantic partner.

One thing that scares me is that being introverted and very independent could cause damage to my relationship or scare them off.

–Lauren

12. I fear being alone forever because of my introversion.

We all need love and companionship, but as an introvert, I don’t like feeling like I have to compete for “airtime” in social gatherings. I love my alone time, but still want a solid group of loved ones.

–Tolu

13. I find it horrifying when my work manager announces, “Let’s have a team-building exercise today.”

I call myself an introvert, as I am someone who enjoys alone time, would rather stay home than go to a party on weekends, and I regain energy by spending time away from people.

The one thing that terrifies me is when my work manager announces, “Let’s have a team-building exercise today.” Though we introverts tend to be team players — as we are all about deep work and being invested in the goals of the group — when it comes to group or team activities, it scares us. Team-building exercises involve interacting with people, small talk, and, in some cases, having the spotlight on you alone. These are all things my introverted self dreads and runs away from.

12 doesn’t bother me, and I pretty much have gotten over being embarrassed, but the rest are true. I have to face number 5 on Thanksgiving with a houseful of extroverts.

I got told that I have to take care of some adolescents that I’m related to next summer and the anxiety has already set in.

Introvert Meme’s

The Science Behind Why Socializing Drains Introverts

To the extroverts, please read this. Introverts will read this and say this is me.

ByJenn Granneman

If you’ve ever felt exhausted from socializing, there’s a very real reason — it has to do with our unique wiring as introverts.

An extrovert and an introvert walk into a bar. It’s a Saturday night, so the place is buzzing with energy. A cover band croons away on stage while groups of people stand around, clutching drinks and nearly shouting to be heard.

The extrovert takes in the scene and feels a surge of excitement. He sees social opportunities everywhere — an attractive woman at the bar, friends to chat with, and the chance to cut loose and have fun. He walks straight up to his group of friends, gives one of them a hearty slap on the back, and orders a beer.

The introvert experiences the situation differently. He hangs back for a moment, surveying the scene and taking everything in. Then, he quietly joins his friends. He feels a bit overwhelmed, drowning in the noise and activity, but he tells himself to relax — this is supposed to be fun, after all.

And for a while, the introvert does have fun. But it doesn’t last.

Soon, the introvert starts to feel tired. Really tired. Not only does his body feel physically fatigued, but his mind becomes foggy and slow (and not just from the drinks). He desperately wants to head home — or at least step outside — where it’s quiet and calm, and he can be alone. He’s already getting an introvert hangover.

He glances over at the extrovert, who’s still chatting away with friends. The extrovert doesn’t show any signs of slowing down. In fact, he looks even more energized than when they arrived.

Sound familiar?

If you’ve ever felt exhausted from socializing, there’s a very real reason. Here’s the science behind why socializing can be draining for us “quiet ones” — it has to do with our unique wiring as introverts.

Socializing Can Be Draining for Everyone

First, let’s clear a few things up. The scenario above is just an example and a generalization. Not every extrovert spends their weekends partying, and sometimes, we introverts live it up, too. We all exhibit introverted behavior at times and extroverted behavior at others. According to the famed Carl Jung, the founder of analytical psychology, there’s no such thing as a “pure” introvert or extrovert. We all fall somewhere on the spectrum that defines introversion and extroversion.

Another point to consider: Socializing is actually draining for everyone eventually. A 2016 study from the University of Helsinki found that participants reported higher levels of fatigue three hours after socializing — whether they were introverts or extroverts. How tired they felt depended on several factors: how many people they’d met, the intensity of the interaction, and whether they had a specific goal in mind.

It makes sense that both introverts and extroverts would feel tired after socializing, as it expends energy. You have to talk, listen, and process what’s being said, among other things.

However, there are some very real differences between introverts and extroverts.

Introverts, Extroverts, and Rewards

These differences stem from how we respond to rewards. Rewards can be things like getting the phone number of an attractive stranger, getting promoted at work, or enjoying a delicious meal.

We all enjoy rewards, and we all desire them. But introverts and extroverts react differently to them.

To understand why socializing can quickly wear out introverts, I spoke with Colin DeYoung, a psychology professor at the University of Minnesota, who recently published a paper on introversion. I was conducting research for my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts. DeYoung, like other experts, believes that extroverts have a more activated dopamine system than introverts.

What Is Dopamine?

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that plays a crucial role in the body’s communication system, helping to control various functions by sending signals between the brain and the body. Often referred to as the “feel-good hormone,” it’s associated with positive emotions like bliss, euphoria, and concentration. Dopamine is vital for a wide range of bodily functions, from movement to sleep to mood regulation. When you experience pleasure — such as eating your favorite foods or during sex — your brain releases dopamine.

However, there can be a dark side to dopamine. It’s strongly linked to addiction. Some recreational drugs, for example, stimulate the release of dopamine and increase its levels in the brain, leading to dependency. That’s how powerful dopamine can be.

Social media platforms tap into the power of dopamine, giving you a boost of it when you watch a funny video or receive likes on your post. This is what keeps you scrolling, even when you know you have better things to do than stare at your phone. In this way, dopamine can keep us hooked on endless scrolling.

Extroverts Have a More Active Dopamine System

So, what does this have to do with socializing?

Because extroverts have a more active dopamine system, they get more excited by the possibility of reward. Dopamine energizes them to strike up a conversation with a stranger or stay at the bar until last call. Even though these activities can be tiring, dopamine reduces the cost of effort, much like getting a shot of espresso before running a race.

Dopamine even explains why extroverts might talk louder, faster, and with more confidence. These behaviors draw more attention to themselves and increase their chances of gaining social rewards.

Introverts have dopamine, too, but our dopamine system isn’t as “turned up” as that of an extrovert. We’re simply not as driven to pursue the same rewards that extroverts chase.

Having a less active dopamine system also means that introverts may find certain levels of stimulation — like loud noise and lots of activity — to be overwhelming, annoying, and exhausting. This explains why the introvert in the bar scenario was ready to leave after a while.

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

The Introvert’s Superpower

Introverts don’t seek rewards to the same degree that extroverts do. Is this a bad thing? In my opinion, no. It’s actually the introvert’s superpower.

We all know that one friend who partied too hard and paid the price, or the workaholic who compromised her health and relationships. These are people who chased rewards — hard.

Instead of seeking external validation, introverts tend to turn inward. They might research topics simply for the joy of learning something new. In their careers, they seek a calling that’s more than just a paycheck. They desire depth and intimacy in their relationships — a connection that is mind-to-mind and heart-to-heart — rather than an abundance of casual acquaintances.

I’m not suggesting that all extroverts are shallow and all introverts are deep. That’s simply not true. Sometimes extroverts pursue quiet, intrinsically rewarding activities; sometimes introverts seek status and other external rewards. A healthy, successful life for anyone should include a mix of both.

When writing my book, I asked introverts to share what motivates and energizes them. They all mentioned low-key activities, like a solo shopping trip, a meaningful conversation with a friend, finishing a good book, or expressing themselves through art. If it weren’t for the introvert’s less active dopamine system, they might not engage in these activities as much. The introvert’s way isn’t about chasing rewards but rather about seeking meaning.

8 Confessions of an Extreme Introvert

By Delilah Ho

If I come across as rude, it’s not that I don’t like you. As a very introverted person, I’m probably just uncomfortable.

It’s difficult being an introvert in a world that only works smoothly if you’re an extrovert. You’re expected to perform well in large groups, socialize often, speak up loudly, and be outgoing. As a highly introverted person, I get mentally and physically fatigued doing all of those things on a daily basis.

Here are eight things I wish people knew about me as an extreme introvert who also experiences social anxiety. Fellow “quiet ones,” can you relate?

Confessions of an Extreme Introvert

1. If I come across as rude, it’s not that I don’t like you. I’m probably just uncomfortable.

Some assume that I don’t like people because I don’t talk or smile much when I first meet them. It’s never my intention to be rude or cold, it’s just that there are a thousand things running through my head at the moment: “What should I say?” “What do you think of me?” and “Do I look like a hot mess right now?” And so on.

I’m quiet around the people I don’t know well, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I don’t like them. As an extreme introvert, I’m just uncomfortable when meeting new people. Honestly, sometimes just being around new people overwhelms me and I freeze up.

It’s easy for my extroverted friends to chat with strangers and make new friends at practically a moment’s notice. But for me, it’s like I need a month in advance to mentally prepare! And even if I did get that advanced notice, when the day arrived, I probably still would not feel ready.

2. I love being alone but I hate the loneliness.

As an introvert, I enjoy doing things by myself. I go shopping on my own. I go to coffee shops on my own. I go to the movies on my own — and I absolutely love it. I don’t feel awkward or uncomfortable being alone in public. Honestly, it’s my preferred state. I love watching everything going on around me and being alone with my own thoughts.

However, as much as I relish being alone, there are times when I crave the love, company, and affection of other human beings. Although I say that I don’t mind doing things alone, sometimes I wish I had someone to do those things with me.

You know, doing what friends do.

You see, no one likes being lonely, even if they’re extremely introverted. We “quiet ones” need close relationships and strong connections in our life, too.

3. Small talk makes me nervous.

I despise small talk because I don’t know how to act around small talk. Usually, when people engage me in chitchat, I give short answers like “oh” and “yeah.” As a result, I think I unintentionally come across as aloof or rude.

Little by little, I’m getting better at making conversation, because it can be a joy to talk with someone who “gets” me. But to be completely honest, I still get nervous chatting about the weather or my weekend plans. It makes my heart beat fast, and later, I think about how I acted in the conversation. Sometimes I beat myself up for not knowing what to say or do. I know not every introvert experiences social anxiety, but it’s my reality every day.

I actually prefer deep conversations straight away.

Ask me what I think of the latest news. Ask me what I think of Freud. Ask me what I think about global warming. Oddly, I can answer those questions without feeling the least bit awkward.

4. I wish I had more close friends.

I have a small group of good friends. They are people who I feel comfortable being around, so I almost always hang out exclusively with them. But if I’m being honest, I wish I had more people that I could hang out with. Yet this goes back to #1 — I feel uncomfortable meeting new people.

Honestly, there are times when I wish people would approach me instead of me having to approach them. That may seem like a strange thing for an extreme introvert to say, but it’s easier for me when other people take the lead in social situations.

Because of this challenge, I finished four years of college with hardly any friends. I may say that, as an extreme introvert, I’m fine with it, but I actually regret not making more of an effort to meet people. Again, it’s a skill I’m working to improve, but like any new skill, it takes time.

5. Even though I love him, dealing with my extroverted boyfriend can be stressful.

I love my extroverted boyfriend but sometimes it drains me to be with him.

He often wants to do things that I would not do in a million years, and he struggles to understand why I’d rather stay home than go out and “explore,” as he calls it. He wants me to meet his friends and family, but I get extremely anxious just thinking about doing that. Sometimes he tells me about social plans last minute, which gives me little time to mentally prepare.

Pet Meme’s To Share, Some People Are Animals

Personally, I don’t agree with number 4. I’m good with what I have. I weed out the insincere ones and my friends are my true friends, few as they are

Sto Viaggiando. Sono Un Tifoso Questo Fine Settimana – So Marriage Monday Meme’s Next Week

I went to see the F1 race in Austin. You can read the results online, but I’m a Ferrari fan, and they finished 3rd and 4th.

I got to spend time with my son, and at my age, I won’t have many of those opportunities again.

I write about how much I hate traveling and crowds, but to spend time with your kids because they want to be with you is priceless.

There may be some random posts, but I didn’t schedule my favorite, Marriage Monday Meme’s.

Best Of Pet Meme’s – Part 1

This will be an intermittent series. It’s a happy post while I’m out. Don’t forget, pets are an Introvert’s best friend, and the first thing we look for when stuck with people

Pet Meme’s And Stuff

Pet Meme’s

These Are the 19 Most Stressful Experiences an Introvert Can Have

ByJenn Grannema

Introverts’ brains are wired a little differently than extroverts’ brains, so everyday experiences can become stressful for us “quiet ones.”

Let’s face it, life is stressful, whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert. But if you’re introverted, like 30-50 percent of the population, certain situations that seem easy for others can become very stressful for you. That’s because introverts’ brains are wired somewhat differently than those of extroverts, making them more prone to burnout, exhaustion, and overwhelm.

What Stresses Out Introverts

1. Talking to people

“Even though I’m a singer in a band and a fairly confident person overall, sometimes it can be so hard for me to talk to people or to ask for what I want.”

2. Being put on the spot, especially at work

“I can usually write a wonderful response if I’m given a bit of time, and I’m even pretty good at giving a spoken response if I’m prepared. But when a coworker or my boss demand I answer right now, my mind goes blank under the pressure, even if I’d otherwise know the answer.”

3. Making small talk with strangers or acquaintances

“My brain shuts off and I can’t think of anything to say.”

4. Job interviews

“All the attention is on you. I also hate a lot of the general questions and really hate having to answer what my best qualities are or what makes me the best person for the job. You’re put on the spot with a question and don’t have time to think about your answer — and introverts need that processing time!”

5. Phone calls… to anyone about anything

“I tend to either over-explain myself in hopes of avoiding miscommunication (one of my biggest anxiety triggers), or I’m forced into silence the majority of the time because the person on the other end is a talker. So I feel awkward. Silence over the phone is waaayyy more awkward than in-person silence (which I love).”

6. Meeting new people, especially when the first impression really counts

“I have a few good friends, and they easily see the real me. But as an introvert, it takes a while for my real personality to come out around people I don’t know well. When I meet someone new, I inadvertently come across as closed off, distant, or even stuck up — and this really sucks, especially when you’re trying to make a good impression! Because I know I do this, I put extra pressure on myself, and even then, I finding myself overthinking about the interaction afterward.”

7. Having to deal with people when you haven’t had time to decompress

“When I work long stretches in a row and have to deal with coworkers and customers while running on fumes, it becomes incredibly stressful.”

8. People who drop by unannounced

“Even though I may enjoy that person’s company, I still need time to mentally prepare to be ‘on’ to socialize. Please give me a heads up before you come to my home or drop by my office. I promise you’ll get a better interaction out of me because I won’t be so flustered.”

9. When people ask very direct personal questions

“I know that some mean well, but it feels like interrogating, plus I find it hard to express myself verbally to certain people.”

10. Group projects and all the drama associated with them

“So many times I’ve asked to do it myself instead.”

11. Speaking in front of a large group

“My mind goes blank, I stumble over my words, and I hate having so many eyes looking at me.”

12. Having to give someone negative feedback

“As a highly sensitive introvert, my empathy kicks in and prevents the words from coming out. It feels entirely unnatural and requires a titanic amount of effort. I want to make sure I’ve considered every angle, that I’m being fair and considerate. Speaking feels premature, even after weeks of preparation or contemplation.”

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

13. Staff meetings

“I feel like I know what I need to do and I don’t need a staff meeting to do my job. As awful as it sounds, I can only take so much of other people’s opinions and direction. I find I just want to do things my own way.”

14. Leading a meeting or discussion…

“…especially with students or other folks with little incentive to talk. As an introvert, I won’t talk just to fill the silence, so if no one else is talking, we all just kind of sit there and stare at each other.”

15. Working in an open office

“With so much noise and frequent interruptions, some days it can feel like the walls are closing in on you.”

16. That moment when you realize you have to head into the extroverted world

“What’s the most stressful for me? That moment after I’ve arrived at my destination 15 minutes early (gladly) and enjoyed sitting in serene silence alone — and now I’m dreading getting out of my car and being thrown into the mix of everyone in this extroverted world. And I realize that I’ll have to do more than just blend in as highly sensitive introvert — I will have to become what they need me to be. And that’s exhausting.”

17. Networking events

“You’re expected to balance food and drink, make yourself heard over the din, be enclosed by the press of bodies, filter out all the other conversations so you can focus on what’s being said — and be brilliant and sparkling! The difficulty level goes up even more when you have to introduce someone and you can’t remember their name! Names do not stick in my brain.”

18. Confrontation of any kind

“My brain kicks into overdrive, making it almost impossible for me to think clearly, which just makes the problem even worse. And then my mouth just starts saying anything, and I come off feeling foolish because I know I’m saying things that don’t make sense but I can’t stop myself. Afterward, I’ll be left thinking about the interaction for hours or days or even weeks.”

19. Dealing with people in general

“They drain me.”

Rest of the article and how to prevent this here, although I can’t prevent it.

The Courage to Stand Alone in an Age of Cowards

This happens to me a lot. Most recently, I was the only one in my family or friends who refused to get the COVID-19 jab. I was pressured on all sides, but it was wrong for me. People even told me how sorry they felt for me that I wasn’t. While I didn’t reciprocate the sentiment verbally, I was thinking how I felt sorry for them. That’s just one example, but it’s a pattern that goes through my life. I’m willing to stand up for what I believe in, even if it means facing ostracism. Inevitably, a lot of what caused my actions came true. It was worth not doing what everyone else does. In reading back that sentence to myself, I just realized that it sounds like my high school experiences.

Fortunately, my introvertedness allows me to move along and not worry if I’m the odd man out. It’s a blessing to not be in the crowd.

Now for the story:

The bravest souls are rarely the loudest in the room, but they are often the most misunderstood. In an age when conformity is dressed up as virtue and applause is the currency of self-worth, those who refuse to play by the script become lightning rods. They provoke discomfort simply by existing in truth. They trigger the insecure, unsettle the complacent, and disturb the carefully curated illusions of the fake.

We like to imagine that the pressure to conform ends with adolescence, with the awkward teenage years when belonging matters more than authenticity. But Solomon Asch’s conformity experiments in the 1950s proved otherwise. In a simple exercise—identifying which line matched another in length—he planted actors in the room to all give the same obviously wrong answer. Time and again, the lone real participant abandoned the truth they could plainly see with their own eyes and went along with the group. Three out of four conformed at least once. Not because they were fooled, but because they did not want to stand out. The fear of sticking out, of being “that person,” overpowered reality itself.

And here is the sobering part: that experiment never ended. It repeats itself every day in classrooms, workplaces, media echo chambers, and politics. People choose the safety of the crowd over the solitude of truth. They surrender what they know is real because they do not want the chill of unpopularity or the sting of rejection. The applause comes cheap, but the price of dissent feels unbearable.

Pair that with Stanley Milgram’s obedience studies in the 1960s—where 65 percent of participants willingly administered what they thought were lethal shocks to another person simply because an authority told them to—and you see the bleak pattern. Obedience to authority and conformity to the crowd are the twin forces that crush truth. And yet, every turning point in history has been authored by those who resisted both—the prophets, the dissidents, the whistleblowers, and the reformers.

To live this way is to accept loneliness as a companion. It is to endure suspicion, ridicule, and rejection, not because one is wrong but because one refuses to settle for the comforting lie. Truth costs dearly, but its reward is integrity: an internal compass that does not lose its bearing when the crowd veers off course.

Applause fades. It always does. What endures is the quiet, steady force of those who never sold out, never bent, and never exchanged their essence for acceptance. They may never be fully understood in their time, but they will always be remembered as the ones who saw clearly, stood firmly, and lived bravely.

source, except for the lead in which is my life

What Does AI Have To Say About This Blog

For kicks, I asked a couple of different engines….here you go

The blog johnsimonds.com, also known as “Delusions of Adequacy,” is written by John Simonds, a critical thinker and writer who uses sarcasm and analytical pattern recognition to explore various topics. The blog lampoons subjects like “Woke” culture, the behavior of “Karens,” hypocrites in positions of power, social media, technology, global power, and issues requiring thoughtful analysis.

Delusions is a platform where he expresses his sharp wit and critique of societal trends, often highlighting power grabs and manipulation, such as his early views on the COVID-19 vaccine narrative. His writing features a sarcastic tone combined with deep pattern recognition and analysis, aiming to reveal truths often obscured by media and political influences. Alongside societal topics, he also writes about introversion, IQ, and success strategies based on his observations and experiences.

Delusions has a background in communications and analyst relations, having worked for companies like IBM. His education includes philosophy (school of hard knocks) and business administration. The blog reflects his intellectual and somewhat contrarian perspective, mingled with a sarcastic style.

Overall, Delusions of Adequacy serves as an outlet for his critical and sometimes provocative views on contemporary cultural and political matters, as well as insights into intelligence, social behavior, and personal development.

—

Then, there’s this:

Ideological / Political Slant
The blog clearly leans strongly toward conservative / anti‑liberal, reactionary rhetoric. Some posts present critiques of “left” ideologies, social justice, or what the author perceives as overreach by government, media, or academia. The language is blunt and provocative. (got that one right)

Mix of Personal and Public
The blog seems to straddle the line between being a personal blog (writing about “My Life,” self‑help, work experiences) and being an opinion / commentary site. The author uses personal voice, “I” statements, reflections, but also publishes political and public commentary. (yep)

Content, Themes & Style

The blog has multiple categories: My Life, Self‑Help, Work, News, General / Opinion, etc.
Self‑help category includes posts about mental and physical health, learning, productivity, and life decisions.
Work category includes posts critical of meetings, on work ethic, reflections from earlier jobs, aversion to inefficiency.
News / Political / Public Commentary is present — e.g. a post about Dr. Jorge Zamora‑Quezada’s alleged medical fraud is under the “news” category.
Another post, “Why Vegans Aren’t As Smart – Your Brain Needs Meat,” uses dismissive, provocative language toward veganism, calling it a “religion” and mocking it.
The tone is partisan and loaded: for instance, in a post about Jimmy Kimmel and celebrity commentary, the author uses strong language (“celebtards,” “they are so stupid,” etc.) and frames the discussion in combative, ideological terms.
Many posts are dated and archived over the years, including ones from 2012 (e.g. “How An Average Joe Can Be A Millionaire”)

Well, it’s somewhat close. At least they got the combatative, sarcastic, blunt, provocative and celebtards right. I thought I called Kimmel an asshole.

They missed the whole Introvert thing. That’s important to me

Oh, I do mock vegans. Sorry, but not sorry.

Introvert Meme’s

8 Reasons Why Introverts Have an Incredible Sense of Humor

1. They are observant and can think outside the box.

What’s one of the biggest skills comedians have? The ability to pay attention and take notice of things other people miss. Introverts pay close attention to details so nothing escapes them.

Observational comedy is a type of humor that is based on the regular aspects of everyday life. It’s the “Have you ever noticed” kind of joke. The comedian starts with something familiar that the audience can relate to and then flips it on its head.

Another aspect of this humor, and why many introverts are so good at it, is the creativity involved. Instead of making an A-to-B connection, introverts tap into their innovative brains and make an A-to-D association — and that’s where the humor comes in. The joke goes somewhere unexpected. Introverts don’t feel pressure to think on the spot like everyone else, which gives them the freedom to try new things and create their own rules. (And, of course, they’ve prepared all their material in advance!)

2. Despite their “quiet” personalities, they can be brilliant conversationalists who know how to keep people entertained.

Introverts have interesting things to say, but they don’t need to be the ones doing all the talking all of the time. They’re great listeners, and because many of them are intelligent, they’re also able to not only hear what’s being said, but they can also comprehend the meaning behind what the person doesn’t say. This ability to “read the room” — and pick up on people’s body language — is something that comedians need to have so they can gear their material to their audience. Introverts just do this instinctually.

And introverts don’t talk only to hear their own voices. They may not be constantly talking, but when they do say something, it tends to be engaging and thought-provoking. People tend to come away from talking with an introvert as feeling seen.

3. They are often self-aware, and that awareness can lead to great comic material.

One of the best qualities a person can have is the ability not to take themselves too seriously. Most introverts know themselves well, and they’re honest about their weaknesses and their strengths. They have a deep understanding of human nature, and it’s their humanity that makes them hilarious.

Some funny people may enjoy self-deprecating humor (humor that makes fun of themselves). But introverts know a little self-deprecating humor goes a long way, and too much can come off as not funny, but pathetic.

It’s okay to make someone have sympathy for you. But if they’re too worried about your well-being, then that takes away all the humor.

Many introverts know to strike a balance between humor that’s self-aware and humor that reflects equally on all humanity. For instance, stand-up comedian Mark Normand does this well and often talks about being an introvert in his material.

As unique as introverts are, so is their humor. Some may be sarcastic or cynical, while others may have a sly wit or share their humorous side by telling personal stories with amusing vocal inflections and facial expressions.

I have a friend who doesn’t try to be funny at all, but just is funny without meaning to be. When she says something hilarious, she’s as surprised as anyone else, and that’s what makes it even funnier.

Honesty is an important element of humor, and many introverts are self-aware enough to be honest with themselves and others. There’s a comedy rule that states, “Only the truth is funny.” It doesn’t mean every single word of a funny story or joke has to be 100 percent funny. Rather, it means there has to be a kernel of truth in every bit, so the reader (or audience member or friend) has something to hang onto.

4. They love writing, which tends to be a solo act.

Any kind of writing involves sitting your butt down on a chair (or standing at a desk) and writing. You need to have focus, drive, and patience to be a good writer. Writing humor is one of the most difficult types of writing, because you have to start with a natural ability to be funny, then know when (and when not) to use the comedy rules.

While there are certainly comedy writing teams, even then, they may write separately and only come together at certain times.

I believe that introverts make the best writers, and when their comedy-writing talent is developed, their writing is masterful. They enjoy being by themselves and working alone. Any stand-up set, story in a storytelling show, or script usually needs to be written first before it’s performed — and that’s perfect for the introvert.

(Here’s the science behind why introverts love being alone.)

5. They tend to be smart and able to see the humor in situations.

Let’s look at satire, which is defined as the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices. This is particularly common in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues. You can’t make fun of something if you don’t understand it in the first place.

Some people laugh in tense situations, even when it’s not appropriate. The reason is that laughter is a stress-reliever, and it can be a coping mechanism. Yet introverts are able to go beyond the obvious and find the humor beneath the surface, which may help them deal with a stressful situation or person. (This is similar to how introverts prefer deep talk to small talk.)

Want to feel more at ease in social situations?

6. They enjoy learning new things and sharing their knowledge with others.

I had an improv teacher who insisted that improvisers not only be educated, but that they needed to be up on all current events, popular culture, and media. If you’re performing in an improv show, and another person starts a scene making a reference to something — and you don’t know what they’re talking about — it can be a problem.

Also, telling the same stale jokes over and over again, and making references to things that happened so long ago that no one remembers what you’re talking about, will remove the funny right out of them.

So, because a lot of introverts are life-long learners, they keep things fresh, and they enjoy sharing what they know with others. Sometimes the best way to get your message across is with humor.

7. They can be fantastic communicators and enjoy expressing themselves (when they are comfortable, that is).

Comedians, like any creative person, need an outlet to express themselves, and sometimes that outlet is a stand-up show. It allows introverts to reveal themselves in a safe way.

If you think about it, it’s not really so strange for an introvert to stand onstage and talk. As the aforementioned comedian Mark Normand says about why a stand-up set is so good for introverts: “[It’s a] one-sided conversation that’s been pre-written and rehearsed over and over. If one of you guys talk, you get thrown out [of the venue].” Now that sounds like heaven for an introvert, right?

8. They are born comics.

You can teach someone how to tell a joke, timing, and even do physical comedy, but having a sense of humor can’t be taught or faked.

While it may seem as if extroverts are more likely to have a fantastic sense of humor, the truth is, just as many, if not more, introverts seem to be professional comedians, stand-ups, improvisers, and comedy and humor writers.

People may have false images of introverts as humorless people who wouldn’t know a witty remark if it bit them on the nose — but they couldn’t be more wrong. Many introverts have a highly developed sense of humor, whether they use it to tell jokes on stage, at the family dinner table, or in an email to a coworker.

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Marriage Monday Meme’s

The Real Reason Introverts Hate Small Talk

Small talk is neither emotionally nor intellectually stimulating, so it can feel like a waste of an introvert’s limited social energy.

Does anyone actually enjoy chatting at length about the weather? Unless you’re a meteorologist, probably not.

More often than not, small talk becomes the go-to conversation when we’re at a loss for words. It fills awkward silences, it eases tension during initial meetings, and it can help steer clear of controversial topics.

But it gets old fast.

Introvert Small Talk

Now, if you’re an introvert like me, you might hate the small talk ritual. Jon Baker, a business coach for introverts, found that 74 percent of introverts said they dislike small talk, as opposed to only 23 percent of extroverts who said they dislike it.

Why do the majority of introverts hate small talk?

By definition, introverts are people who feel drained by socializing and recharge their energy by spending time alone. Because small talk is neither emotionally nor intellectually stimulating, it can feel like an inefficient use of their limited social energy. In other words, if introverts are going to use up their energy, they want to spend it in ways that really count.

(Not sure if you’re an introvert? Here are 21 signs that confirm you’re an introvert.)

Also introverts tend to enjoy delving deep into topics and exploring ideas on a meaningful level. It’s more energizing to talk about things that feel important and relevant to them. Small talk, by its very nature, remains at a surface level.

But those aren’t the real reasons introverts might hate small talk.

Why Introverts Hate Small Talk

It’s not that introverts hate socializing or people. Even though we’re introverts, we still need close, healthy relationships to thrive.

As my friend Dr. Laurie Helgoe points out in her fascinating book, Introvert Power, “Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.”

Small talk doesn’t bring people closer. Quite the opposite — it can create a barrier that prevents the kind of genuine, intimate connections we all crave.

Think about it. When two people get stuck in small-talk mode, discussing only “safe” and polite topics like the weather, they don’t really learn anything new about each other. They don’t get to know the other person or understand who they are. They miss discovering that their conversation partner, for example, wakes up early to go birdwatching, hates the color yellow, or grew up on a family farm.

As a result, the relationship doesn’t grow in a satisfying way. In general, introverts are interested in understanding people’s thoughts, feelings, life lessons, and experiences, which isn’t usually achieved through small talk.

The key is to transform small talk into meaningful conversation. Here are some tips from my upcoming course, Easy Conversation, designed to help introverts and those who are shy or socially anxious feel at ease in social situations and enjoy more fun, meaningful conversations.

Small Talk Tips for Introverts

Small talk has its place. Patrick King, in his book Better Small Talk, explains that socializing and cultivating relationships happen by degrees, not all at once. “Zoom out, and you can see where small talk fits in and why it’s so important — it’s the first of many steps in closing the distance between you and another person,” he writes. Small talk allows us to warm up to each other, but it’s not where we want to stay.

The secret to not just surviving, but also enjoying small talk, lies in transforming it into a meaningful conversation. If you’re an introvert, meaningful conversation will give you a much-needed energy boost. When you’re immersed in an interesting or thoughtful conversation, you might just end up chatting the night away!

So, here are four tips to turn small talk into more meaningful conversations.

1. Invite the other person to tell a story.

One powerful tool to make conversations more meaningful is to encourage the other person to share a story. To do this, avoid closed-ended questions, those that can be answered with a simple yes or no, or just a few words. Closed-ended questions like, “How are you?” or “Did you have a good day?” limit the depth of the response and can often end the conversation before it even starts.

Instead, ask open-ended questions. For example, instead of asking, “How was your day?,” try, “What was something interesting that happened today?” or “What did you do today that made you feel accomplished?” Questions like these invite the other person to tell a story.

Here are more ideas from Chris Colin and Rob Baedeker, authors of What to Talk About:

Instead of…

“What line of work are you in?”
“How was your weekend?”
“What’s up?”
“How long have you been living here?”

Try…

“How’d you end up in your line of work?”
“What was the best part of your weekend?”
“What are you looking forward to this week?”
“What’s a strange detail about where you grew up?”

2. Ask why instead of what.

Here’s a twist on asking open-ended questions: Instead of asking only about the facts, the what, probe deeper into the why. This strategy, suggested by The Date Report, pushes the conversation beyond surface-level information and delves into the person’s motivations and values.

For example, after asking, “What college did you go to?,” ask a follow-up question like, “Why did you choose that college?” The second question will reveal much more about the person. Their answer might shed light on their passions, their decision-making process, or even their personal history.

Similarly, if someone shares that they recently watched a particular movie, rather than just asking, “What was the movie about?,” you could ask, “Why did you pick that movie?” or “What about that movie appealed to you?” You might get some insight into their taste in cinema, their interests, or what kind of narratives or themes resonate with them.

In essence, asking why nudges the person to share more personal information, which can lead to a more meaningful conversation.

3. Share a few details and see what sticks.

This can be a hard one for us introverts, because we tend to dislike talking about ourselves. It places the spotlight directly on us, which might make us feel vulnerable and exposed. As a result, we may not open up for people unless we know them well. Unfortunately, this tendency can lead to a repetitive cycle of tedious small talk.

As I explain in my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts, a good strategy to break out of this cycle is to sprinkle a few personal details into your conversations and observe what resonates with the other person. For example, when faced with routine questions like, “How’s it going?” or “How are you?,” instead of responding with the standard, “I’m fine, how are you?,” try to expand on your answer by sharing a bit about your day. You could say, “I’m doing great! I woke up early this morning to jog along my favorite trail. It really invigorated me!” Or, “I’m feeling tired because my two-year-old woke me up in the middle of the night, and I couldn’t fall back asleep.”

When you share details about yourself, notice how the other person reacts. Do they show genuine interest and continue the conversation with a follow-up question like, “That sounds great! Where’s your favorite trail?” Or do they give a disinterested nod? If the other person doesn’t seem interested, try revealing another detail about yourself until you hit on a topic that gets the two of you talking.

This strategy is like throwing a few conversational lines into the water and waiting to see what bites. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but with practice, it can become a natural and effective way to transform small talk into meaningful conversations. Remember, it’s not just about finding common ground; it’s about revealing the unique layers of your personality and allowing others to connect with you on a deeper level.

And, if you’re an introvert, this approach allows you to control the depth of self-disclosure, making the whole interaction more enjoyable.

4. Dare to be honest.

We often sacrifice expressing our true thoughts and feelings for the sake of politeness. But there’s something very authentic — and surprisingly charming — about being completely honest. In her book, The Irresistible Introvert, Michaela Chung encourages us to elevate conversations by voicing our honest feelings and thoughts, which can be surprisingly captivating. For instance, instead of nodding along and pretending to agree, try saying things like:

“To be honest, I don’t go to parties very much. I feel pretty overwhelmed being here.”
“I’m not a big talker, but I like listening.”
“I don’t like camping. Like, at all.”
“I’m really proud of that.”
“This feels awkward.”
“That hurt my feelings.”
“No. I don’t want to go. I’d rather stay home and have some me time.”

Such candid admissions might seem intimidating to share, but when done tactfully, it strengthens the bond between you and the other person. By sharing your preferences, feelings, and thoughts directly, you give the other person a chance to know you better. It also signals that you trust them enough to share your true feelings, which can make them feel more comfortable doing the same.

Remember, honesty isn’t about being blunt or rude; it’s about expressing your authentic self in a respectful manner. For introverts, these honest exchanges can make socializing more enjoyable and less draining, because they transform superficial small talk into meaningful, authentic conversation.

In social settings, the introvert brain is busy processing every word and detail, which explains why it can feel so exhausting.

If you’re an introvert like me, the idea of being around a large group of people can feel overwhelming in a way that extroverts just don’t understand. If you get anxious just thinking about concerts, networking events, or even holiday parties, you’re not alone.

Spending too much time around people can lead to what’s called an “introvert hangover.” I’ve experienced this many times myself, but over the years, I’ve learned how to recognize the signs —

7 Signs Your Social Battery Is Running Low

1. You just don’t feel like talking.

Even if it’s someone you normally enjoy chatting with, when you just don’t feel like engaging in conversation, it may be a sign that you need alone time ASAP.

The introverted brain processes information more deeply, which means socializing can take more mental energy than it does for extroverts.

When we’re in a social setting, our brain is working overtime to take in all the conversations, stimuli, and dynamics happening around us. It’s no wonder this can be exhausting.

That’s why introverts need time alone to recharge our batteries and regain the energy drained during social interactions. Without it, we simply won’t feel like chatting!

2. You second-guess everything you say.

When you try to engage in conversation but feel like your words are coming out all wrong, it may be a sign that your brain is running on empty and needs some downtime to recharge.

When you’re constantly second-guessing yourself or worrying about how you’re being perceived, it adds even more strain to your mental reserves.

Bottom line: For introverts, processing information and managing our own thoughts and feelings at the same time can lead to decision fatigue.

3. The thought of being around people makes you anxious.

If the idea of interacting with others makes your palms sweat and your stomach churn, it’s a clear sign you may need to take a break from socializing until your energy levels return.

For introverts, being around people can be mentally exhausting, especially if we feel like we have to be “on” or put on a persona that doesn’t feel natural.

We also tend to prefer meaningful, one-on-one conversations over small talk or large group interactions, which can quickly drain our social battery.

4. You start zoning out during conversations.

Do your eyes glaze over when someone starts talking? That could be a sign your brain has reached its limit for social interaction and is craving peace and quiet.

Because social interaction consumes energy, the constant pressure to stay engaged, think of responses, and keep up with conversations can quickly become overwhelming. Eventually, the mental fatigue catches up, and we just zone out.

5. Your temper is shorter than usual.

It’s hard not to snap at people when all you really want is some quiet time to yourself. This can happen before you even realize your brain and body are overdue for a break.

For introverts, socializing can be stressful. As a result, our patience runs thin, and we may become easily frustrated or irritated. Suddenly, it feels like everyone and everything is getting under our skin.

6. You have trouble sleeping.

When our brains are overstimulated, it can keep us awake at night with racing thoughts.

Of course, difficulty sleeping can be caused by many things — from medical conditions to hormonal changes — but it can also be a sign of an introvert hangover.

Since we introverts burn through more energy while socializing, the aftermath can leave us feeling wired but tired. That “buzzed” feeling makes it harder to settle down and drift off.

If this sounds familiar, try carving out some extra downtime before bed — like reading a good book, journaling, or taking a warm bath — to help calm your mind. The key to healing your overstimulated brain is to get those zzz’s back on track.

7. You crave alone time.

This one comes as no surprise! If all you want is to escape the constant chatter and noise, chances are an introvert hangover is on its way.

While society often stigmatizes spending time alone, for introverts it’s a natural and necessary part of life. Alone time helps us recharge, feel refreshed, and show up as our best selves.

So take a look at your calendar and schedule solo time like it’s a non-negotiable appointment. It could be as simple as going for a walk, meditating, or journaling — whatever helps you reset.

Marriage Meme’s

How do you practice self-care?

How do you practice self-care?

Set boundaries

I had to learn that lesson the hard way. If it meant my sanity or a friendship, I’ve gone both ways, but I’m protecting my ass from now on.

I’ve done too much stuff that when in the middle of doing said stuff I thought, “I really don’t want to be here or doing this”. I don’t do that shit anymore. If it looks like a suck now, I bail early.

I also don’t let people run over me. It’s not that I was a dormat, I just didn’t understand that some people would use you and take you for granted. It never had occurred to me until it happened to my ass over and over again. I didn’t even know at first you could say no and not hurt someone’s feelings.

Well, no more. I draw the line. I’ve seen it upset people, only to find the people not being upset or even thinking of me shortly thereafter.

It’s made my life a lot better because I’m not in situations that I don’t want to be in.

You’d think it would have taken me less time to figure this out, but no.

Introvert Meme’s – Good One’s Today

What do you enjoy most about writing?

What do you enjoy most about writing?

What I like best about writing is it forces me to slow down and makes me think about what I’m saying. Grammatically, I think my writing is a disaster sometimes, but many times I’ve been able to deal with a situation in my head through unspoken words only to me. When the time came for the conflict or resolution, I was practiced and ready.

Anybody who reads my blog knows that you’re gonna get a lot of introvert information from me. When I write, I’m not talking, and since 90 % of talking is small talk, it has reduced value for me.

Best Of Introvert Meme’s – Part 5

Thursday’s Introvert Meme’s

Thursday’s Introvert Meme’s (different from above)

America’s Economic Engines: The Biggest Industry In Every State

Ever wondered what fuels each state’s economy? In most cases, the biggest industry is either real estate or manufacturing.

This Markets in a Minute graphic, via Visual Capitalist’s Jenna Ross, in partnership with Terzo, highlights the industry contributing the most to GDP in every state.

The Biggest Industry Ranking

Real estate powers the economy in over half of states. This is largely because the Bureau of Economic Analysis treats homeowners as landlords renting to themselves, and includes the rental value in GDP. If economists did not include this value, a jump in the homeownership rate would cause GDP to drop.

On top of this, the real estate industry includes rent paid by renters, property taxes, construction, remodeling, and brokers’ fees.

State/District	Biggest Industry
Alabama	Manufacturing
Alaska	Transportation & Warehousing
Arizona	Real Estate
Arkansas	Manufacturing
California	Real Estate
Colorado	Real Estate
Connecticut	Real Estate
Delaware	Finance & Insurance
District of Columbia	Government
Florida	Real Estate
Georgia	Real Estate
Hawaii	Real Estate
Idaho	Real Estate
Illinois	Real Estate
Indiana	Manufacturing
Iowa	Manufacturing
Kansas	Manufacturing
Kentucky	Manufacturing
Louisiana	Manufacturing
Maine	Real Estate
Maryland	Real Estate
Massachusetts	Professional & Technical Services
Michigan	Manufacturing
Minnesota	Real Estate
Mississippi	Manufacturing
Missouri	Real Estate
Montana	Real Estate
Nebraska	Finance & Insurance
Nevada	Real Estate
New Hampshire	Real Estate
New Jersey	Real Estate
New Mexico	Real Estate
New York	Finance & Insurance
North Carolina	Manufacturing
North Dakota	Mining, Oil & Gas
Ohio	Manufacturing
Oklahoma	Government
Oregon	Real Estate
Pennsylvania	Real Estate
Rhode Island	Real Estate
South Carolina	Real Estate
South Dakota	Finance & Insurance
Tennessee	Manufacturing
Texas	Real Estate
Utah	Real Estate
Vermont	Real Estate
Virginia	Real Estate
Washington	Information
West Virginia	Mining, Oil & Gas
Wisconsin	Manufacturing
Wyoming	Mining, Oil & Gas

Source: U.S. Bureau of Economic Analysis. Data for the 2024 calendar year. Some industry names have been shortened including real estate and rental and leasing; mining, quarrying, and oil and gas extraction; federal civilian and state and local government; and professional, scientific, and technical services.

In second place, manufacturing is the biggest industry in 13 states. Its prominence is heavily concentrated in the Midwest and the South thanks to the long history of the sector in some states, large plots of available land, and government support.

Rare Economic Leaders

Outside of real estate and manufacturing, some industries are the top GDP driver in a much smaller number of states.

For instance, finance and insurance is the biggest industry in New York, Delaware, Nebraska, and South Dakota. Over half of publicly-traded U.S. companies incorporate in Delaware thanks to balanced and flexible corporate laws, a business-friendly environment, and a respected legal community. In South Dakota, financial services are drawn to the state’s business-friendly taxes and trust laws that can shield families from inheritance taxes indefinitely.

Mining and oil and gas creates the biggest economic output in three states. North Dakota is the third-largest crude oil producer in the country, while Wyoming and West Virginia are America’s top two coal producers.

The government is the biggest GDP driver in D.C. and Oklahoma. Lastly, professional and technical services (Massachusetts), information (Washington), and transportation and warehousing (Alaska) were the top industry in one state each.

Marriage Monday Meme’s

he Science Behind Why Introverts Need Alone Time

The same things that motivate and energize extroverts can feel tiring and annoying to introverts, such as a big party.

As an introvert, I love spending time alone. There’s almost nothing better than being at home in my comfy clothes, quietly reading a good book, or watching a show while munching on snacks. This doesn’t mean I don’t crave time with “my people” — those I laugh with, learn from, and share my day with. However, without enough alone time, I start to feel tired, irritable, and overstimulated, even when I’ve enjoyed the company of those I love.

I show all the classic signs of being an introvert.

Sometimes, when I need alone time, the people in my life feel hurt. They view it as if I’m rejecting them and our relationship. But it’s not about them. I need time alone to recharge my energy and function well in my daily life.

The Curious Connection Between Introverts and Rewards

When writing my book, I spoke with Colin DeYoung, a psychology professor at the University of Minnesota who had recently published a paper on introversion. He explained that one reason introverts need alone time is related to how we respond to rewards.

No, I’m not referring to the gold foil stars you might have earned in grade school (though it could be argued that stickers are indeed a reward for kids). For adults, rewards can be things like money, social status, social connections, sex, and food. When you get promoted at work or convince an attractive stranger to give you their phone number, you’re receiving a reward. Hurray!

An Extrovert and an Introvert Go to a Party

The Dopamine Difference

It’s called the “introvert” hangover, not the “extrovert” hangover for a reason.

story

Best Of Introvert Meme’s – Part 4

Friday Introvert Meme’s

Introvert Meme’s, Because They Are True

Posting Might Be Light This Week

I’m on semi-vacation with some family. Go read my introvert posts on how well I do with that.

So I have some stuff ready, but mostly I’ll be watching my social battery drain. I went to one of the most average theme park yesterday. I mostly chased kids.

I’m already in introvert hangover

Best Of Introvert Meme’s – Part 2

I was just finding out about this but I identified with so many of them it started coming together better every time I did it (for the most part).

Introvert Meme Time

These Memes Perfectly Explain Introverts’ Thoughts at Holiday Parties

Meme’s Introverts Will Understand

There is some good stuff that you look at and say it’s both funny and true.

Best Of Introvert Meme’s – Part 2

Still in the pretty old stuff so should be better than the last one. As you can see, I was still playing around for a title. I think that is in the next round of best of.

Introvert Memes For How I Answer When I Get Invited To Something I Don’t Want To Go To

It’s Introvert Meme Time Again

Introvert Meme’s For My Introverted Readers

Why I Post Introvert Information. Hint, It’s Not Just For Introverts (plus meme’s to share), But Mostly Ranting

Big Balls Is Back, Saving Social Security This Time

On Thursday, Wired reported that ‘Big Balls’ is back and now at the Social Security Administration.

Wired reported:

Edward “Big Balls” Coristine, one of the first young technologists brought on to Elon Musk’s so-called Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), has returned to government shortly after resigning.

“Edward Coristine joined the Social Security Administration this week as a special government employee,” Stephen McGraw, an SSA spokesperson, tells WIRED. “His work will be focused on improving the functionality of the Social Security website and advancing our mission of delivering more efficient service to the American people.”

Multiple sources at the SSA tell WIRED that Coristine has appeared in person to work onsite at the agency’s Woodlawn, Maryland, headquarters. One SSA employee says they saw Coristine with DOGE engineer Aram Moghaddassi, a current X and former Neuralink employee deployed at the agency. The pair was spotted at the SSA cafeteria as recently as Monday, although it’s unclear what day this week Coristine’s employment officially began. “Coristine looked nervous, almost embarrassed,” the SSA source says. “Aram was on the phone with someone … then said, ‘Yes, I’m with him right now,’ gesturing to Big Balls.”

The Best Of Introvert Meme’s

The Walmart stuff is getting stale, plus some of the better introvert stuff was at the beginning. Enjoy.

Introvert Stuff, Depicted By Meme’s

Meme’s Introverts Will Understand

These Memes Perfectly Explain Introverts’ Thoughts at Holiday Parties

Introvert Meme’s and Cartoons, But They Say Everything Extroverts Should Know (stop trying to change us)

Introvert Meme’s, Because They Are True

What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

I’m self-entertaining. I don’t need others to do something or for motivation to get something done. I’m perfectly happy to do a task alone and would likely enjoy it more.

It has other benefits such as I don’t look to others to see what I’m going to do, like not take the Covid-19 jab.

Introvert Meme’s

Mid Week Meme Dump

Name A book You remember from childhood

Do you remember your favorite book from childhood?

Me and Caleb

Introvert Meme’s

11 Things Introverts Secretly Wish You’d Stop Doing

Our extroverted culture encourages a lot of behaviors that aren’t introvert-friendly — things that drive us up a wall.

Are you an introvert who feels like your social battery is constantly low? Do you find yourself trapped in conversations you don’t want to be in — or just feeling misunderstood?

There’s a good chance the problem isn’t you. In fact, the problem might be that our extrovert-oriented culture encourages a lot of not-so-introvert-friendly behaviors — things that drive us up a wall (or send us retreating to our quiet homes) and make us wish the world had a mute button.

Here are some things we introverts wish other people would stop doing. I can’t speak for all introverts, but I believe these 11 things are common introvert pet peeves.

11 Things Introverts Wish You’d Stop Doing

1. Talking to them when they’re reading or doing some other solitary activity

I will never, ever understand why holding an open book isn’t the universal symbol for “don’t talk to me.” To me, the mere sight of a person reading a book implies a bright, neon Shh! Quiet, please! library sign floating in the air above them.

Instead, open a book in a public place, and you can practically hear the eyes swiveling toward you as every extroverted or bored person within a mile realizes, Ooh! Someone who doesn’t have anybody to talk to! They must be waiting for me to come wow them with my brilliant repartee!

No. We’re not. We are merely — and I swear this is true, as shocking as it may seem — trying to read. Please respect that.

(That said, if you ask what book we’re reading because you can’t see the cover, that’s fine. Just please leave the ball in our court as to whether the conversation continues.)

2. Not taking the hint when they no longer want to talk

I don’t want to be rude (or even appear rude). I want to be a nice person, who has a nice exchange with you, and then we nicely wrap it up after a moment and go our separate ways.

But if you want the Nice Introvert on my end, you have to give me the Conscientious Extrovert on your end — the one who can read subtle, polite cues and body language. (No shade to my neurodivergent friends, especially those on the autism spectrum — this doesn’t apply to you!)

To spell it out: If someone is glancing back at their laptop, book, or activity that you interrupted, or toward their vehicle or the exit, or if they say, “Well…” and trail off, or say, “It was nice meeting you,” they’re nicely telling you that your time is up. Let ‘em go.

Because if you don’t, Nice Introvert has to go away — and you’re going to get Uncomfortably Direct Introvert. And yes, I will walk away in the middle of your sentence.

(Most introverts, though, will suffer in silence to be polite. And that, honestly, is an even worse outcome. Don’t make them do that.)

3. Telling them “there won’t be many people” — then inviting everyone you know

I would love to be able to follow the labyrinth trail through an extrovert’s mind that leads from “I’m only inviting a few people” to “Hello, One-Hundredth Person to Arrive, come on in, there are drinks in the kitchen — just past the people playing Who Can Yell Words the Loudest, to the left of the 8,000-Decibel Sound System from Hell. Nope, you didn’t miss the Clown Car Full of People We Don’t Know Who Will Somehow Still Be Here; they should be arriving soon!”

However it happens, please stop.

It’s totally fine if you want a big house party — but just say that. If you tell us it’ll be small, quiet, and/or that not many people will be there, please understand that we are expecting a total of four to six people (or maybe a dozen if the word “party” was involved).

Keep in mind: To introverts, once a gathering is too big for everyone to be involved in the same conversation together, it’s no longer “small” — and it won’t make us happy.

4. Making introvert jokes

Okay, pop quiz: When is an introvert joke appropriate?

Answer: When an introvert is the one making it. Period. That’s all, folks.

Look, I get it — introverts are “a thing” in pop culture now, and the jokes are usually good-natured. (“Oh, you’re an introvert? You must hate being here!” Ba-dum-dum.)

Introvert jokes are, at best, a mild annoyance. But they’re also tedious, they reinforce inaccurate ideas about introversion, and honestly, they’re overused. (You’re not the first extrovert to come up with that line, I promise.)

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5. Talking forever without asking the introvert about themselves

Just about every article about introverts says we’re “great at listening.” Are we? Or are we bored out of our minds and desperately looking for a way out while someone goes on and on about problems at their workplace — talking about people we don’t even know?

Look, I’m an introvert, and even I know that conversation is all about give and take. It’s about passing the torch. I tell a story or make a point, and then I give space for you to tell a story or make a point. We talk about my thing for a while, and then we talk about your thing. Sometimes this back-and-forth happens naturally; other times, you can prompt it by simply asking the other person a question.

But if you don’t pass the ball, the entire conversation becomes unpleasant.

The issue is, many introverts have softer voices or don’t jump in and start talking over someone else — which, to be clear, means we are being good conversation partners. But some extroverts (or clueless people of all stripes) take that to mean we’re riveted, and they just keep on going.

So stop. Ask me about myself. I promise I’ll do the same for you. (Or, at a minimum, I’ll take the opening to excuse myself and run in the opposite direction.)

6. Assuming any pause in conversation is your opening to take over

This goes hand-in-hand with the previous point. We all know pauses in conversation are natural, right?

Sure, in a large group, if one person pauses, it’s a nice chance for someone else to add something. But introverts often need a few moments to formulate their thoughts before they start talking. Unfortunately, that doesn’t jibe with our species’ rapidly shrinking attention span, and people assume they can just jump in over us.

This is especially a problem in one-on-one conversations. For introverts, these are the perfect convos — the ones where both people can go a little deeper. If you ask us a question, or we open our mouths to talk and then pause, please, give us a beat. Let a few seconds go by. I guarantee you’ll become one of the few conversations we actually enjoyed that day — and it’ll probably be more interesting for you, too.

7. Lumping all introverts together, assuming they’re all shy, quiet, or socially awkward

Yeah, I get it. Lots of introverts don’t like public speaking. Lots of introverts hate the spotlight. Lots of introverts dislike parties. And some introverts are shy, feel socially awkward, or have social anxiety.

But guess what? Not all introverts check every single one of those boxes — and some don’t check any at all.

Personally, I love being in the spotlight, and lots of introverts are performers, public speakers, or otherwise stand in front of people for a living. (Some are even A-list celebrities — including Taylor Swift!)

Likewise, although I used to be very socially awkward, I spent a lot of years practicing my social skills, and now I feel comfortable talking to strangers at parties or networking events, or making conversation overall. And I might even enjoy a party for an hour or two — just not all night.

Really, the only thing all introverts have in common is that we get tired quickly from social interactions. That’s it. Whether we’re good or bad at any particular social skill — or whether we enjoy socializing up to a certain point — varies from person to person.

So, please, stop lumping us together.

8. Putting them on the spot

Say it with me: Introverts need time to mentally prepare.

That means we do not want to be handed the mic, called out in a group, asked to perform an impromptu song, or anything else that involves being put on the spot.

Here are some things you can try saying instead:

“For the bonfire party next week, would you be willing to bring your guitar and do a few songs? It’s okay if not.”
“Hey, we’re going to do toasts after dinner, and I’d like to ask you to give one. Could you think of something by then?”
“So-and-so was supposed to do the presentation today and just messaged that they’re stuck in traffic. I know you aren’t prepared, but you helped put together the deck. If I stall with the clients to buy you 10 minutes to prepare, could you do the presentation?”

Of course, the introvert may still decline — but by giving them some time to think about it and prepare, you’ll make for a much better experience for everyone.

9. Talking during movies, shows, and other events that don’t encourage talking

Okayyyyyyy, so I don’t know when this became a thing, but it seems like people treat shows and movies as background noise now — chit-chatting instead of, I don’t know, watching the show. Is it because there are subtitles on almost everything? Is it because the endless binge of episodes isn’t very satisfying, so you need something more?

To this, I daresay most introverts are more interested in following the plotline than we are in bantering about your workday.

To be clear: Once a show or movie is turned on, you have two options — either zip it and watch, or pause the show when you have something important to say. (But don’t overuse the pausing privileges.)

10. Treating them as your personal therapist

Introverts can be deep and thoughtful. We can also come across as wise — sometimes by accident — because we think first and talk later. Despite what I said before, introverts can be attentive listeners with the right person or in the right situation.

But none of that gives us an endless well of emotional energy, and none of it makes us a trained therapist. (Except for the introverts who are, in fact, trained and licensed therapists.)

So if you’re close friends with an introvert whose opinions you respect, by all means, let them know when you’ve got something heavy on your mind and ask if you can talk to them about it. That’s what friends are for.

But that quiet, soulful, soft-spoken, patient individual you just met literally 30 seconds ago? That is not your therapist. That is a random introvert who is internally panicking at your awkward overshare while desperately trying to save even one ounce of the energy you’re sucking out of their social battery.

11. Surprising them with plans, from parties to showing up unannounced

Don’t. Just don’t.

Seriously. Don’t.

There are a lot more, I promise

Pet Meme’s

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Introverts Don’t Hate People, They Hate Shallow Socializing

When introverts socialize, they’re not looking for a way just to pass the time. They’re looking for a new person with whom they can share their inner world.

I like to make jokes about how much I hate people. As an introvert, it’s easy to do. The stereotype of the misanthropic introvert is backed by countless memes and pop culture references. Think of the animated character Daria with her oversized glasses and a book in her hand, or that catchy quote from Charles Bukowski, “I don’t hate people, I just feel better when they aren’t around.”

These memes and quotes exist for a reason. They’re funny and relatable, and I’ve enjoyed sharing them just as much as anyone else. But there’s a darker side to them. They can also serve as a coping mechanism — something to hide behind. Let me explain.

It’s the whole “I’m too cool for school” persona. It’s easy for me to say I spent the majority of the party playing with the host’s cat because the people there weren’t half as interesting as the books I have at home. It’s harder for me to admit that getting past the barrier of small talk ranges from somewhat daunting to downright terrifying. So I oversimplify and say I don’t like people, when what I actually dislike are the surface-level interactions of most social gatherings.

We’ve all been to those parties where the sole purpose of the event is for everyone to break into small groups and talk about sports, the weather, or where the host’s second cousin got her hair done. It’s moments like these when it suddenly becomes very important to find out if there’s a pet you can play with — or, when all else fails, perhaps a large potted plant to hide behind. If there’s a drink to be fetched or a bowl of chips to be refilled, this task will instantly become the sole purpose of my existence, because literally anything is better than small talk.

However, despite appearances, I don’t hate people. I just hate shallow socializing.

And therein lies the problem that has kept thousands of introverts awake until all hours of the night. Because being an introvert doesn’t mean you want to be alone all the time. But unfortunately, in order to meet people to share your inner world with, it’s necessary to go out and socialize. In order to get to those coveted discussions about life goals, creative passions, and the existence of the universe, you sometimes have to start with some small talk — no matter how painful it might be.

Sometimes You Have to Go Out to Appreciate Staying In

As an introvert, I view socializing much like I view other aspects of my life that I know are good for me in the long run but really aren’t very enjoyable in the moment. Do I really want to go to the gym when I could just go home and watch Netflix? No. Do I really want a salad for lunch when I could have a hamburger? No. Do I really want to go to a party when I could curl up in bed with a book and a cup of tea? It’s a no-brainer.

However, to reap the rewards, you have to put in the work.

It’s all about balance. Just like I might treat myself to a piece of chocolate cake as a reward for all those days at the gym last week, I’ll spend a quiet Saturday night at home because I know I already put in a night of socializing and interacting with people outside of my comfort zone on Friday.

The reward of staying in is so much sweeter when it’s saved as its own unique event to look forward to — whereas staying home with a book feels a whole lot less special when you’re doing it for the tenth night in a row. Sometimes you have to go out to fully appreciate staying in, and vice versa.

I never would’ve met some of my closest friends if I had chosen to stay home and read all the time. The relationships I have now were worth the anxiety and apprehension I felt upon venturing out of my comfort zone to establish them.

Unfortunately, finding those kinds of relationships is rare, because socializing doesn’t always have tangible rewards. Sometimes I leave an event feeling drained and wishing I’d never left the house. Other times, I might feel that it went okay, but I know the surface-level conversations I held all evening probably won’t lead to any life-altering friendships. But that’s okay, because not every conversation or evening out has to be life-altering.

For the Introvert, Socializing Isn’t Just a Way to Pass the Time

As an introvert, it’s my natural tendency to always want every interaction to be about establishing a lifelong deep connection, but I’ve learned that can put too much pressure on the average casual conversation. Sometimes it’s just about staying in practice with my (albeit limited) people skills until the day when someone suddenly wants to talk about their dreams and goals and all the things that make them tick. It’s impossible to know where a conversation will lead unless you try.

I’m aware of just how ridiculous my socializing philosophy might sound to extroverts. To them, socializing itself is the end goal. My extroverted friends are always looking for something to do on the weekend, during the holidays, and even on work nights. They pursue socializing for the in-the-moment excitement that it brings. For me, attempting to socialize is a long-term goal — one that I carefully craft and balance so I don’t get mentally or emotionally overwhelmed.

“Going out” is rarely exciting for me in the moment. But I always have hope when attending a party or trying a new networking event that I’ll make a friend who is also dying for a quiet cup of coffee while chatting about life, or who wants to take a trip to the beach just so we can lie side by side and read in complete silence.

When I socialize, I’m not looking for a way just to pass the time. I already have a full list of hobbies and interests and not enough hours in the day to enjoy them all. But I’m always looking for a new person with whom I can share my passions and my world. Sometimes meeting that one new person can be worth the agony of socializing. I like to think I’m the kind of person worth socializing for, and I know I’m not the only one of my kind.