I see this as a good thing. Store bought boobs never really looked that great. You can always tell, clothed or not. They even feel wrong.
Here’s the deal. Everyone, especially straight guys will look at any boobs. If there is about to be a fight and some girl takes off her top, the fight stops.
In reality, girls tell me they dress up for other girls. Guys don’t care that much. There is a joke that we’d be happier if you showed up naked with a 6 pack. We’re just happy to have some boobs around.
I’ve talked to girls about them and even they like boobs. They may judge each other and must have some reason like insecurity or to show off to get augmented, but that is a personal decision.
I am happy for those who get re-construction after a mastectomy, but that is not what store bought fake boobs when you have perfectly good ones is about.
Finally, here are songs that tells you we like them no matter what shape, size or age they are.
I have nothing against them, except they always tell you they are vegan. I feel sorry that they don’t get to enjoy the bacon cheeseburger that I’m having tonight.
Oh, I won’t be telling anyone I’m not vegan. They don’t want to know that either.
I swear I wrote this in my journal this morning. I was grateful that I got rid of that ball and chain a long time ago. I busted ass for a long time to be in this position and it is worth it, I Gar-un-tee it!
Sure I’m older now and don’t have as many years left, but Sunday night doesn’t suck as much knowing that if it’s a bad one, I don’t have to hate the next 24 hours.
When I watched the NFL before it went woke, I used to go to Monday Night Football and get home late and not sober. How I made it to work the next day and was able to get through it is beyond me now. I guess I was young and it didn’t affect me like it does now, even though I gave up all my bad habits.
Just not being able to sleep, which happens a lot now can ruin the next day.
This is Jo Siffert at Daytona in 1970 in a Gulf Porsche 917. Out of all of the versions of this dominating car, this was both my favorite and my first encounter with it. He was my favorite driver and died too young.
It was the first time I’d seen a car go over 200 MPH in person. I was young, so it was impressive.
I was already a Porschefile by this point, but that day cemented it home.
I’ve seen them race many times, but I was with my Dad that day and it still is memorable for me.
Later, the car was the star of the movie Le Mans. Steve McQueen was in the movie, the king of cool, but the car outshone him.
Some call it the greatest sports car ever, and for those of us who have seen it race, we understand why.
After all…..this is the greatest line ever in a car movie.
They sang 2 songs last Sunday, posing as National Anthems I read (because I didn’t watch). The Star Spangled Banner and Lift up your voice and sing (I think that is the name).
The ratings are down, they are bleeding fans because of Covid and being Woke. Did they not look at the Olympics ratings and why people didn’t watch?
I have always worked with the famous, the rich and the empowered, something I’m not proud of, but it came with the territory of my career. They were always tedious, demanding and self-entitled. I was always glad to be done with them when the job was over. Their entourage’s were even worse, with no real reason other than they thought they were meaningful because of who they worked for.
The rabid fans will stay I suppose, except those with a mind and a conscience. The rest will get fed up and bail.
I have been a season ticket holder to a team that has won multiple Super Bowls and has many players in Canton. I can’t take the kneeling and the other crap that is dividing our country and has nothing to do with sports.
These are the best paid in the country for playing a kids game, yet they feel entitled to tell us what to do and how to think. It’s the same for hollywood and the celebtards. They need to realize that watching sports is for fun and to get away from all the political crap. Instead, they choose to cut their throats even further.
Those with a brain are finding something else to do.
They are being stupid and should just play the game.
Some kids pranked a school board in Virginia with oldies like Wayne Kerr (Wanker), Don Kideck (donkey dick) and so forth. It’s going around but here it is. This guy had no idea he was being used like toilet paper, classic.
Some kids pranked a school board meeting on some Bart Simpson shit and I am crying!! 😭😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/c9fX3GbejA
In one of my auditorium classes (that held 250) students, we had a test and then were having the lecture. Back then it was 35 mm slides. My cousin was taking a photography class and I had her make me a whole roll of nudes.
While people were turning in their tests, I had my friends block the view between the teacher and me. There were slots open starting at the 7th slide. We anxiously waited that slide and he kept teaching because the screen was behind him. It was a shot of Marilyn Monroe from Playboy to start out. He took it well.
This was in the Animal House days. By the time the movie came out, we’d already done everything in the movie except the horse. We weren’t on double secret probation because we never got caught. We also stole the right test and got A’s in the class.
Now, here are the names you can use that weren’t called out in the prank. Some below were used in the prank above.
It’s almost as good as Euphemisms for Stupid, one of my top 2 posts ever. Someone reads that every day from around the world still. Hats off to the Bob and Tom Show (Paging Richard Smoker) and SNL for these. The clips are out there somewhere still.
Seymour Butts
Dick Beater
Richard Smoker (big dick smoker)
Jack N Off
Harry Balls(ack) – 2 for 1 here
Harry Beaver
Peter Stroker
Mr. Baiter
Haywood U Blowme
BJ Hunter
Peter Wanker
Woody Spanker
Sharon Peter
Stu Pedaso
Iwana Wiener
haid d’salaami hous bin pharteen
Ive bin pharteen
jenna t’alia
jack izdikov (off)
justin detoush
suq madiq
usuqa m’diq
i’lik madiq
liqa madiq
yuliqa m’diq
u’wana m’diq
munchma quchi (coochie)
grabbir boubi
i-sheet m’drurz
shaif herboush
mustaf herod apyur poupr (up your pooper)
awan afuqya
yul strokheet al-wautch
apul madeek-aou
t
And, who can make a list and not include:
Mike Hunt
One of the tech support guys called the receptionist and had her page Mike at least twice over the loudspeaker to an entire warehouse. It was childish, but then so am I and I laughed as loud as everyone.
If it can be aimed at, we give it a go. Piscuits are low hanging fruit. A moving bug is much more challenging. It also guarantee’s a mess, but we take the shot anyway. We also play peeing for distance and other childish games.
I’m sure girls think we are silly, but when a group of them were asked what they’d do if they had a dick, they said aim it when they piss. (guys said they’d feel their boobs if they had them and shoot milk at each other like a squirt gun, still a dick thing).
When there is a stain on the bowl, we won’t clean it if we can knock it off with a stream. Yes, we write whatever we can on the sidewalk and in the snow. The ones that say they don’t are lying, but a few do need their man card revoked. We don’t even have to be taught this trick. It’s instinctive to try it.
Why do we do it? Because we can. Sure, our equipment isn’t as pretty as females, but it is useful and a built in play toy. Why do you think we hold on to it so much?
Best of all, the whole world is our urinal if needed.
I even broke up with a girlfriend who got mad at me when I had to take a leak by the side of the road because she was worried what people would think of her. They wouldn’t ever look at her for laughing at me. I knew she wasn’t a keeper at that point. Every thing was a joke to me and she couldn’t take a joke. The woman I married knew how immature I can be and ignores it most of the time.
More specifically, researchers found that consuming one 85-gram serving of chicken wings translated to 3.3 minutes of life lost, owing to sodium and harmful trans fatty acids, while a beef hot dog on a bun resulted in some 36 minutes lost “largely due to the detrimental effect of processed meat,” study authors wrote.
Joey Chestnut is about dead. He knocked back 75 dogs this year to win the contest. He looks pretty healthy to me. Badlands Booker on the other hand better prepare his will.
The good news is that a PB&J sandwich adds 33 minutes to your life. I’m going to be about 3000 years old given that I’ve lived on it for 5 or more decades.
I used to read the paper there. Now I read the phone. I still say I have to go read the sports page to be nice about dropping a deuce.
Don’t forget that if by chance you use the talking to another person feature on your phone, that you can be heard making bodily noises, or at least the echo that everyone recognizes.
Owning one of these is the only time I’d want to live in Oregon, Washington (either one), California or New York. Let’s not forget that the same people have invaded Florida.
Actually, I should be banned from having one. I’d be in jail within minutes of buying it.
Oh, I’d write a lot of other stuff too. Imagine if an ex came in or a celebtard whining about their $20 million Disney contract? No telling what I’d write, but it would be good.
I know doctors pride themselves on straight lines when operating. They told me.
Just like the anti-matter a few posts below, there are some things I should be banned from doing. This would be close to the top of the list.
Not a chance I wouldn’t play with these and laugh my ass off. I’d also be reported to HR within minutes for some inappropriate joke. It would be worth it.
I wonder if these ladies take work home with them?
Now, there is this one on Mother’s milk. It’s almost as creative and funny as the engineer.
The teacher has a sense of humor. I have no idea what number 7 really is, but the answer is good enough for me. I thought he was going to mention play toys at first.
Note: I have nothing against them, except they always tell you and complain about what I’m eating. I never mention how they are missing out on the joy of bacon.
By far, my most popular posts are What’s it like to have a high IQ and this one, Euphemisms for Stupid. For a decade, this post was #1 worldwide in Google on how to call someone stupid.
More people have re-used content on this post around the world than some marketing campaigns by Facebook, and that is where a lot of it wound up it seemed (and I still have a happy life after I fired them).
To honor that post, I updated it today (there are almost a hundred creative ways to say someone fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down or that they couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel) with this one:
Enjoy, and if you want to find out a way to say someone is stupid that you’ve never heard of, go get you some at the link above.
I’m like Jeff Foxworthy. I grew up getting the Sears catalog in the mail. Those were the only girls in underwear you would see, until Victoria’s Secret gave us the catalog of dreams.
They put beautiful women in underwear for men and women to admire. Good art in any form is beautiful (the Sears models reminded Jeff of the lunch lady at the school cafeteria). It’s why there are so many naked statues. It was the concept of art to an artist. That they lasted longer than a catalog has so far so that also says something.
Victoria’s Secret has chosen going full woke over earning a profit, succumbing to the hypersensitivities on the left to embark on a major rebranding.
Even the standard size 32B mannequins on display in their stores didn’t make the cut, as the forms representing the female figure will now come in new shapes and sizes.
The paper said the company has been “scrutinized heavily in recent years for its owner’s relationship with the late sex offender Jeffrey Epstein and revelations about a misogynistic corporate culture that trafficked in sexism, sizeism and ageism.”
OK, back to my observation.
I’m not sure what is more stupid. Is it the marketing decision to lose this much money, goodwill and customers or to think that most people wanted to look or what make it hugely successful. Do they think that this is more beautiful than Giselle Bünchen in angel wings?
I’m sure there is a small portion of the population who identifies with this and good for them. The problem is it is ruining the beauty that was the draw for the other 98%.
I know this type of display is inclusive or is progressive or something politically correct in the eyes of the PC and SJW police, but I (and see below or read the article above for how many others) still think they are ruining a good thing.
All of this has come together to ruin another concept that has been around since whenever man showed up, women are beautiful. Both males and females think that the fairer sex is a work of beauty. For example, everyone thinks a naked woman is something beautiful to look at. I’m willing to bet that there are a lot more people (even females in beards) that find them better to look at than most men naked. There aren’t that many Chip n Dales guys just walking around. And let’s face it. Other than a few people who can ruin anything by being mean and nasty, almost all women are beautiful in their own way.
If there are 330 million people in the US (a low guess) and throw out the old and the young, you would still have a few hundred million just in the USA who liked the older style catalog and their models a lot more. VS is big all over the world so even the PC people like to look at the real catalog, not the travesty that is this year’s.
I don’t care how many likes they got in social media. Most people go along with the crowd in public and social media is a bunch of pretend anyway.
Get woke go broke they say. I doubt it for VS, but it hasn’t helped the bottom lines of Nickelodeon Channel, Gillette, Coke, the NBA, MLB, NFL and other companies.
It looks like I’m not alone. I’ll put up some links that have something to do with it in whatever way that is interesting.
First, you have to know what brrrrttttt is. It is the sound the 30 MM cannon makes from an A-10. If you don’t know the sound or are female and want to know what the big deal is (read, how childish men can be at any age) it is very important to know the sound to actually get the meme.
It will help you understand your man though as this stuff goes through our heads, its only 37 seconds.
For those who know the sound and are a guy, enjoy and I hope you laugh. Get you some.
I wonder if this is going to offend hillbillies? I wonder if that name is a cultural appropriation? What if it is a racist name?
Fear not, I have a strain in my family as southern as turnip greens.
I shake my head as I’m making fun of woke people using hotdogs, and yet I think there might be someone ready to lead a revolution to protect hillbillies now from discrimination. On second thought, nah.
The key to getting out of these toys that you get in Cracker Jacks or the Movie Theater is to relax. How can you do that when all the blood has rushed to your head?
This is so wrong above. The rules are if there is more than two urinals, the second guy goes to the furthest one. You always look straight ahead, but if you have to, you can only look the other guy in the eye.
I have been a huge Star Trek fan since TOS. I’ve met some of the actors at conferences for work.
I went to the Star Trek Experience at the Vegas Hilton. It had all the props from all the series in timeline order. There were 3 ships hung above. One was the NCC-1701, there was either the Voyager or Excelsior and I think a Klingon Bird of Prey. No matter, the props were good enough.
I lived each episode as I went down the display case. The actual phasers, tri-corders, costumes and ample descriptions. It took me hours to get through.
Later, they added a Borg exhibit and you get to experience 4D assimilation.
I still have a Tribble at home.
If they would only give me a replicator I’d be in heaven. They probably shouldn’t give me a phaser because I couldn’t promise to keep it on stun for some people.
I know someone who just went vegan and sure enough, I get to hear all about it. I don’t really care what anyone eats other than me so I’ll skip any vegan jokes here.
I drew the line at asparagus for breakfast though. No, just no.
It was the first time the word douchebag was used on TV.
This is where I admit to having the humor of a 12 year old, but this is still funny. The off hand remarks by Lord Salisbury (steak), Lord Remington (shave), the Earl of Sandwich and Parliament being full of douchebags for centuries.
On 4/20 day, this is going to be especially funny to someone.
I’m not sure if we should blame the parents or the kids. These are time out kids, not fear of God ass whooping that kept us in line and for most of us kept us on the straight and narrow later in life.
I’m not for spanking kids here so save the hate. I am for proper discipline and letting kids grow up as kids without mind numbing drugs they give the boys.
There are a lot of comparisons and finger pointing that anyone can make here so I’ll delete the comments by jerks.
I rode in the back of a pickup in a lawn chair on the way to the beach because it was a 2 person truck with 3 people going. At 9 in the morning, someone ran up and handed me a beer to which all the nearby cars were honking in approval.
I made it to the beach safely and returned with a lot fewer IQ points due to the alcohol.
I bet I forget names as quickly as you do. There are memory aids like associating a name with an object or another person to help you, but who remembers that when you are just trying to hear their name the first time?
I gave up trying to dance around the subject and just say I’m getting old or my hearing is going (both likely to be true) and ask them to tell me again. More often than not, they forgot my name also.
Most likely, I just move along and not really care. I find that being nice and waiting to see if they will really enter your life or is it just being cordial determines if I’m going to remember their name.
Either way, it’s a conversation starter, not something for Introverts so it won’t be me unless I just want to ignore everyone.
And Now for Guys, I present the Nothing Box. Girls, you should pay attention if you really want to understand men, even though you’ll never really get it.
Also Guys, understanding why women’s minds are so busy is also explained. It’s something we’ll never get.
What is so funny to me is that every time I try to explain it to a girl, she can’t understand it or wants to get into my nothing box. They never understand that if you got into my nothing box, it would be a different box (see at 8:15 where nothing is something). Watch and see:
Lou Ottens, the former Philips engineer who gave the world its first compact cassette tape, has passed away. According to Dutch news outlet NRC Handelsblad, Ottens was 94 when he died on March 6th.
Ottens started work on the cassette tape in the early 1960s. The way NPR tells the story, he wanted to develop a way for people to listen to music that was affordable and accessible in the way that large reel-to-reel tapes at the time were not. So he first created a wooden prototype that could fit in his pocket to help guide the project. He also worked to convince Philips to license his invention to other manufacturers for free. Philips went on to introduce the first “compact cassette” in 1963, and the rest, as they say, is history. But that wasn’t the end of Ottens’ career. He went on to help Philips and Sony develop the compact disc.
It’s difficult to overstate the importance of cassette tapes to music culture. We wouldn’t have mixtapes and playlists without them. What’s more, they allowed people to listen to their favorite songs and albums on the go. No ads or input from a radio DJ. That’s something that has come to define how people enjoy music ever since. And for all of their flaws, in recent years, cassette tapes have enjoyed something of a resurgence in popularity. In 2016, sales of the format increased by 74 percent. Two years later, they grew another 23 percent with help from the soundtracks of Stranger Thingsand Guardians of the Galaxy.
I remember having tons of cassettes laying around and a ton of broken cases. Sometimes the cases matched the tape inside.
Does anyone remember rewinding one with a pencil eraser because it got caught?
Somehow, the portability of music got us off the sofa and out jogging or skateboarding because we could listen to tunes. I think some people just wanted to show they could play tunes.
On the bright side, this is the beginning of the end to unwanted conversations on the plane.
I’m not fazed by water. Instead, I use it to my advantage.
I’ll get a brand new ball out to hit over the water and I try to hit first. Once safely over the water hazard I tell the other players not to worry about the water. Inevitably, one of them will hit it in and be pissed at me the rest of the day. I make sure to laugh at them on purpose.
These are the head games of golf. There are many. This one is just a fun one that will put you in the head of the player who hit the water, especially on the next water hole.
Enjoy the next time you do this. Hopefully it is early in the round so you can enjoy the day.
This quote was supposed to be about grit, but the passion came in when it helps you keep going.
While Angela Duckworth separates passion and perseverance into two separate dynamics, Steven Kotler argues that passion is part of perseverance; it plays an essential role in determining how motivated you will be to keep going. “Passion doesn’t make us gritty,” he says, “Passion makes us able to tolerate all the negative emotions produced by grit.”
Anytime I wanted to get a real team together to get something done, passion was the trait i looked for in people I wanted to hire. Some have a passion just to get a job, not to do it well. You have to want to do it and want to do it well. Those are two different and distinct things.
Find your passion and you will do what you want to, probably well. That is except for golf. No one does well at golf all the time.
Oh yes, by the time Animal House was made, I’d already done everything in the movie except the horse.
When I saw this headline, my younger devious self joined with my older Celebtard loathing self and the headline was too good for me to pass up. Here’s the story:
Six people have been arrested after the iconic “Hollywood” sign was altered to spell “HOLLYBOOB.”
The group draped large tarps to the sign to change the letters, according to Sgt. Leonard Calderon of the Los Angeles Police Department’s Hollywood Station.
The letter “B” was draped over the “W,” while a white dash was placed across the “D” in order to make it appear as a “B.”
The Los Angeles Times reports that five men and one woman were seen on video surveillance altering the sign around 1:15 p.m. When An LAPD helicopter arrived at the scene, officers could see the group make their way back down the steep terrain toward the famed Mulholland Drive, where they made the arrests.
The incident cannot be classified as vandalism “because the sign wasn’t damaged,” Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) Capt. Steve Lurie, the Hollywood area commander said, per the outlet. The six will be charged with misdemeanor trespassing and released, he said.
According to Deadline, one of the arrestees told an officer the prank seems to have been an effort to create more awareness for breast cancer.
However, MTV reality star Julia Rose who was among the six arrested told DailyMail she orchestrated the LA-based stunt in protest over censorship, after her Instagram account, with five million followers, was suspended this year for nudity.
The 27 year old, who founded the website Shagmag, shared a photo of herself in front of the altered sign on Twitter, while flipping off the camera and sticking her tongue out.
“This was to show them that I still have a voice,” she told DailyMail.com. “My business for Shagmag with almost one million followers also got disabled this year due to nudity, but I’m not doing anything more than what Playboy is doing so I think they’re discriminating against my accounts.”
Police presence will be increased for several days and possibly weeks because of the incident.
I like Spike and Tyke, The Cat Concerto and many of the Hanna Barbera animations (the later ones weren’t as good). The one that won me over was Cat Fishin’ The episode is below.
“Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself.” – Jane Wagner
It turns out that Jane was a comedy writer for Lily Tomlin. I sort of thought it was a joke but it had so much to do with the name of my blog, I’ve even put this statement in the sub-title.
I’ll stick with my title, it seems a better fit for most of the stuff that has been going on recently.
