I originally posted the story below in 2006 on the death of my Father.
I’ve been blogging since 2005. I’ve covered IBM, Analyst Relations, Covid-19, humor, pets, sarcasm, and introverts.
Unfortunately, my medical condition has worsened, and I can’t keep up with both dying and blogging.
A few people have extended their best wishes. Some posted what they liked about it, which I found interesting. Some found themselves (those who didn’t know they were introverts).
If you could, leave a comment as to what you liked, or if by chance I helped educate you on something.
I’ve enjoyed it, but all things come to an end, and so this is it for Delusions of Adequacy. Thank you all for reading.
I’m leaving the blog open because there is a lot of educational subjects, probably 10,000 memes and some stuff that made it to the top of Google for a while.
I’ve had fun, but since I’m not having much fun with my chemo, something had to give. Actually, a lot of things had to give.
Original post
My Father passed away today and I won’t be posting for a while. I’ll leave you with this story.
The Wooden Bowl
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.
The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about Grandfather,” said the son. I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather’s direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.” The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening, the husband took Grandfather’s hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I’ve learned that, no matter what happens or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I’ve learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents; you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life.
I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as making a “life.”
I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.
I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.
I’ve learned that every day; you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch – holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.
The World Cup is More like the WWE than a sport. I’ve haven’t watched that much, but I saw a guy go down in agony with a real injury, 30 second later he was setting a record for sprinting to get the ball. It’s getting bush league
In good news Fisherman rescues 220-pound sea turtle tangled in thick ropes. (More here)
Death by Socialized Medicine – Let the Europeans brag about their substandard healthcare they get for free. They pay for it in taxes and in the long waits for bad service.
The Left’s Deep Hatred of America as We Celebrate the 250th Anniversary – they also hate God. Let’s be real clear that Democratic Socialism, what they claim they are now is the same term Germany used for being a Nazi. While the Left were so busy calling everyone a Nazi, they were the actual ones.
How short life is. It seems long, like in 3rd grade when I was waiting for school to end.
I’m at what will be my end in a few months. I’ve lived for decades and 2 different centuries, but like my Father told me on his 75th birthday, how did it go by so fast. I’ll never see that birthday number.
Since I’m saved, I’m not stressing over it, other than for my pets. I have family that will take care of my dog in case I go first. He’s starting to limp and might also be on his last couple of years.
I’d like to say something that would help others, but it’s going to be the same for everyone. You live, then you die, then you go to Heaven or Hell depending on your decision on forgiveness of sin.
As for me, anytime I feel something funny, like last night, I wonder how much time is left here. My time is all but over.
The cancer that is going to get me was completely a surprise, as was discovering it. That was an accident also.
Enjoy your family on this Holiday weekend. You never know when it’s your last. I do. I’m not going to see the next 4th of July, but at least I got to see the 250th Anniversary of our Country
The 4th of July for most on Earth is another day in the week, month year. Independence Day is when the greatest country was started.
For the readers of this blog, my medical diagnosis says that this will be my last one to celebrate.
I don’t want to get into it with internet pukes because what really matters is that it’s my Mom’s Birthday and the Day She died, July 4th. I’m also patriotic so I got lucky to grow up and live in the USA.
My mom was a patriot for God, but loved the USA. We were middle class and no more growing up. She lived through the depression so a dollar stretched to about $4.50 for our family. She had a masters degree in Education and Music, but chose to be a homemaker and a mother. That’s how I’ll remember her on this day.
Back to the original premise, we might have never made it to the moon, or invented air conditioning, cars, planes, trains and numerous medical advancements that have helped the world for the last 250 years.
I know haters shoot at #1, so it’s the Democrats who hate the good in our country. Hating America: The Hollywood Left’s Worst Anti-American Outbursts. You can see from the World Cup that the rest of the world woke up to the fact that the media lies about the good that the USA does for people primarily because of Trump (current excuse). The media are liars vying for power by means of thought and word, but they have been against anything that is right for the country and serve their leader, the devil.
Trump will go down as either good or bad, loved or hated or how ever he goes down in history, but he’s just a piece of the last 250 years of making the world better.
I stopped going to see my wife’s relatives in Europe because they just spout the media talking points about how bad we are. I was tired of their ignorance and prejudice as the Euro press possibly hates the US more than the Democrats. I don’t have to listen to it this way. I can read the European press and find out what her family would say to me. I have very little time left on Earth, I’m not going to waste it on people who are ignorant.
Europe is a museum now of what used to be great. The USA has been the leader in most things for decades. I bet the rest of the world gets tired of hearing the Star Spangled Banner every day at the Olympics or other global sporting events (I think soccer is a 2nd tier sport despite what the rest of the world tries to tell us).
So Happy Birthday Mom, and the rest of the world should be happy that we made it as a country, especially Europe around 1917 and 1940-45. It would be one big Germany otherwise. (She’s been gone 20 years now).
No country has invented more or helped more people medically, socially and historically. I’ll give you that the art from hundreds of years ago is better and looks good in the European museums, but they are static. People are working to invent new ways of doing things and curing illness (except Covid, that was a lie we told).
No other country has a hot dog eating contest on the 4th either.
Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a disgrace to any people. — Proverbs 14:34
The scientific case against scratching mosquito bites. – grow up in Central Florida without bug spray and play outside. They don’t come near me now. They want new blood, not from a guy who spent his childhood getting bit. Also, cut down the alcohol and they hit the next person.
Well, it certainly didn’t help as the hype machine kicked in that Supergirl star Milly Alcock — who has all the charisma of a sidewalk and the body of a 14-year-old boy — started opening her mouth about how she’s a victim of sexism and Supergirl is queer.
And so, under the guidance of James Gunn, DC’s “new direction” is looking like quite the failure. Last year’s Superman barely broke even (if that), and now Supergirl is a notorious flop. Girls aren’t Superheros. They copy the men’s story and emasculate the men. Thats’ why men don’t go. It’s not even a believable fantasy. Most men can kick ass on them even with superpowers
Germany 1930 Repeats itself
The DSA Takes Over The Democrat Party – The first Democratic Socialists that accomplished anything were the Nazis. I wonder if the pukes at the press pool will have the guts to print that
Europe Discovers The 20th century
Did The World Cup Just Start A War In Europe Over Air Conditioning? It was a big thing in the 1950’s and 60’s here. That’s why I just SMH at Europeans who trash Americans. Their answer is that is what they read. Also a reason not to trust the media to be fair and unbiased.
When the PC was invented, I saw the future in front of me. Opportunity knocked and I answered. I did every job you could do on them.
The head of our DP department said we would have no need for any PC’s. It was as clear to me then as the PC you have for your everyday use (or more than 1) that this was going to be the future. I got in very early to the phenomenon and a decision that early in a career was very fortunate.
I retired early because of that decision and where it took me.
Over the years, countless critics have pointed out the errors both in Gore’s film and in his ensuing personal crusade as, like Don Quixote, he continues tilting at windmills (while ironically advocating for their proliferation).
I could type pages on this one, but I’ll spare the readers. Most write better than I do anyway so I’m interested in their thoughts.
As for me, as soon as we meet, I throw up a wall until I can trust whomever you say you are. I also look for clues as to who they really are, not who they say they are.
For girls, I look for red flags like hair dyed in an unnatural color, excessive piercings (or one in the nose), too many tattoos (more than one hidden one. Most of all, check her friends and family. Crazy girlfriends means your petite petunia is likely been run through by a lot of dudes. Body count matters a lot too. No matter what, even if you are a way better guy, you are compared to the past.
For Guys, there is a line between confidence and cockiness. It can be smudged at first, but it shows itself. I don’t mind an Alpha male, as long as he’s decent to others. There is always a bigger fish.
Being an introvert, anyone who talks too much small talk instead of substantive conversation is kept on the sidelines. I just can’t listen to drivel for the sake of talking. Introverts will understand this.
The first line to break a relationship for me isn’t lying, everyone does that. It’s loyalty. That is like virginity, you can only lose it once. Once it is gone, our relationship is stalled probably where it started. So far, no one has gotten a second chance. I’ll never really trust you again, despite my best efforts.
The biggest thing I learned was to not talk back immediately, say no early and often to most things, and don’t commit to doing things you know you don’t want to do. That has saved me more time from the suck portion of life than almost anything.
Like I said, I can go on, and on, but that would just be a continuation of the life of an introvert.
The World Cup and Climate Change together on a solution they’ll never find. Don Quixote-ville. Two subect that can go fake and are boring to watch and listen to
World Cup Fever Not Expected to Be Growth Driver. It’s not going to be the big event it would be in other countries, soccer, or your footbal is 4th or 5th at best in US. South America will have to hold up the Americans who care
The ‘Pride Month’ Pendulum Is Swinging – I think more people are being honest that they don’t support it like they said they did. They cried wolf too many times and brought debauchery where they went.
There are times that I need to brake on some topics The chemo has me feeling almost sea sick. I still have some humor, life experience and every day stuff.
So unless I fall into the well of yo momma memes, this is the last post on this subject.. Steal them as I need to clear cloud storage space. They are high on my list to remove for the space in my cloud storage
I lose more readers on this category than any other I post about. Try to get that it’s a joke and doesn’t represent who I am, other than I thought some were perfect.
It used to be getting a fast car or a bigger house. The signs are always there. When you make money, you spend it just as easily.
Some want to be a Rocket Builder as a side job and is pulling off stuff NASA would only now be in planning meetings for.
Other, with a Musk type mood and wanting to have a dick measuring contest to see who makes that better rocket.
In this case, it’s one to Musk just for not doing this now. I know some or his blew up in the past, but this race to the moon is a new (actual) line of news and gets going before I’m gone.
Bezos can just blow up many millions of rocket pieces for nothing and build another one. That is called F/U Money, when there ain’t nothing left to spend it on.
Anywho: Here’s and Excerpt:
OAN Staff Lillian Mann 2:10 PM – Friday, May 29, 2026
Jeff Bezos’s “Blue Origin” rocket erupted in a massive explosion during a launchpad test after a hot-fire test went wrong, sending smoke flames and debris soaring miles into the sky.
Nearby homes shook as a bright orange plume erupted above the launch pad, billowing into the night sky over Cape Canaveral, Florida, on Thursday.
Bezos’s aerospace company, Blue Origin, was conducting a routine prelaunch static fire test when the vehicle exploded.
The heavy-lift New Glenn rocket was reportedly being prepared for its fourth overall flight in early June, which was scheduled to deploy a batch of 48 Amazon Project Kuiper low Earth orbit (LEO) internet satellites.
An un-crewed Blue Origin New Glenn rocket exploded on a Florida launchpad during a test, erupting into a massive fireball.
“All personnel are accounted for and safe,” Bezos said on X. “It’s too early to know the root cause but we’re already working to find it. Very rough day, but we’ll rebuild whatever needs rebuilding and get back to flying. It’s worth it.”
The satellites are designed to compete with billionaire Elon Musk’s Starlink network — by providing high-speed, space-based internet service to users around the world, according to Reuters.
The 322-foot-tall New Glenn rocket has launched three times previously and is classified as a heavy-lift launch vehicle, capable of carrying massive payloads typically ranging between 20 and 50 metric tons, as Blue Origin aims to compete with SpaceX’s Falcon 9 and Falcon Heavy rockets.
All personnel are accounted for and safe. It’s too early to know the root cause but we’re already working to find it. Very rough day, but we’ll rebuild whatever needs rebuilding and get back to flying. It’s worth it. — Jeff Bezos (@JeffBezos) May 29, 2026
I spent most of my life prior to the Internet. I worked in the tech industry so I was able to get on it earlier than most, but that didn’t change my regular life.
I never had to worry about social media either. You could just not Answer the phone, or call someone back. When you broke up, it was over.
I could get to anywhere I wanted with a piece of paper with instructions on it, and a (dime)/quarter to call a home phone since we didn’t have cell phones. All my friends could get there too, and we all got there on time, and at the same time. 
That means I also write in cursive, and can drive stick. The first car I had was so old I had to learn how to double clutch to downshift.
We learned to read the weather by observing the wind, the sun, the title patterns, and observe nature.
I had to look up stuff in an encyclopedia, or find a book using the card catalogue system to write term papers.
So if they drop EMP, I’ll be just fine. As for Gen X, why, Z, millennials, and the rest of the people after boomers, they’re effed.
The post-conversation spiral happens when you leave a social interaction and can’t stop overthinking whether you totally screwed it up.
My brain was doing it again.
I’d had a lovely time getting to know a potential new friend. We had a lot in common. We were both single moms, both about the same age, and both working in mental health careers. She got my references. She seemed to understand my life. And the dinner meetup was, well, fun.
So why was my brain picking apart every little thing I had said and done?
You idiot. I can’t believe you said that.
Why did I share that story? Did I trauma dump?
She said she wanted to hang out again… but she was probably just being polite.
Even though I make my living writing about introversion, social anxiety, and socializing, I had fallen headlong into a common pitfall: the dreaded post-conversation spiral.
What Is the Post-Conversation Spiral?
You might think the social anxiety problem ends when the conversation ends. But for a lot of people, that’s when the second half begins: the mental replay, the shame, the “evidence gathering,” and the imagined judgment.
Psychologists call this post-event rumination or post-event processing. It’s when you replay a social situation in your mind, focusing on what you think you did wrong. Instead of remembering the interaction as a whole, your mind zooms in on a sentence you wish you had phrased differently, a pause that felt too long, or a facial expression you couldn’t quite interpret.
Research has found that the more socially anxious someone is, the more likely they are to ruminate after a social event. In other words, the post-conversation spiral is not just a bad habit or a personal weakness. It’s a real part of the social anxiety cycle.
And unfortunately, it makes anxiety worse.
Why Your Brain Does This
Social anxiety makes you focus on yourself. Instead of simply being present and enjoying another person’s company, part of your attention turns inward.
Then, when you replay the conversation through the lens of fear, you’re not reviewing it neutrally. You’re acting like a detective searching for clues that confirm your anxiety while overlooking the evidence that everything went fine. A small awkward moment starts to feel like proof that the whole interaction went terribly.
This is one reason the spiral feels so convincing. It seems like you’re gathering facts, but really, you’re gathering anxious interpretations.
And even if you would never be diagnosed with an official social anxiety disorder, you may still know the feeling of coming home from an otherwise pleasant interaction and suddenly wondering whether you totally screwed it all up.
Why ‘Just Stop Thinking About It’ Doesn’t Work
If you’ve ever tried to force yourself to stop replaying a conversation, you already know that doesn’t work. Sometimes the harder you try not to think about something, the louder it becomes. You tell yourself, “Stop thinking about that weird thing you said,” and now the weird thing you said is the only thing available for your brain to think about.
A better approach is not to fight the anxious thoughts, but to change how you respond to them.
The goal is not to convince yourself that every conversation went perfectly. That would be unrealistic, and your brain probably wouldn’t believe it anyway. The goal is to become a little more balanced and a little less self-punishing.
How to Stop the Post-Conversation Spiral
Here are six science-backed things that can help:
1. Name what’s happening.
The first step is to recognize the spiral for what it is. You might say to yourself, “This is post-event rumination,” or, “My brain is replaying the conversation because I feel socially anxious right now.”
That creates some distance. Instead of treating every thought as a proven fact, you take a step back and begin to see it as part of an anxiety pattern.
There’s a difference between “She thought I was weird” and “I’m having the thought that she thought I was weird.” The second version does not make the worry completely disappear, but it does give you more room to question it.
2. Pinpoint the specific moment you’re stuck on.
Ask yourself: What moment keeps coming back to me? Once you identify the specific worry, it becomes easier to examine.
“The whole night was terrible” is hard to work with. “I’m worried I talked too much about my divorce” is something you can actually think through.
3. Ask what evidence you actually have.
This is where cognitive restructuring can help. Cognitive restructuring is a technique often used in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) that helps you examine whether your thoughts are accurate, exaggerated, or incomplete.
Ask yourself:
What evidence do I have that my worry is true?
What evidence do I have that it might not be true?
Is there another possible explanation?
What would I think if a friend told me they had done the same thing?
For example, maybe your new friend got quiet after you told a personal story about your divorce. Your anxious brain decides, “She was uncomfortable and now she regrets meeting me.”
But there are other possibilities. Maybe she was thinking about what you said. Maybe she related to it. Maybe she was tired. Maybe she didn’t know how to respond in the moment. Maybe the pause felt much longer to you than it did to her.
The point is not to force a positive interpretation. The point is to stop treating the most painful interpretation as the only one.
4. Check your expectations.
If you’re socially anxious, you probably hold yourself to a standard you would never apply to anyone else. You expect yourself to be warm, interesting, funny, appropriate, relaxed, responsive, emotionally available, and perfectly articulate all at once. No awkward pauses, no clumsy wording, and no signs of nervousness.
People say odd things. They interrupt without meaning to. They tell stories that don’t land exactly the way they hoped.
A more realistic standard might sound like:
Did I show up?
Was I kind?
Did I listen?
Did I make an effort to connect?
Did the other person seem comfortable overall?
If the answer is mostly yes, the conversation does not need to be put on trial.
5. Make a plan only if a plan is needed.
Sometimes rumination is trying to point you toward something useful. Maybe you want to send a simple text saying, “I had a nice time tonight.” Maybe you genuinely said something that came out wrong and you want to clarify it. In those cases, take one concrete action.
But notice the difference between action and rumination. Action sounds like, “I’ll text her and say I enjoyed dinner.” Rumination sounds like, “What if she thought I was desperate when I said we should hang out again, and maybe I should wait three days, but what if waiting three days seems cold, and what if she only said yes because she felt sorry for me?”
When there is something to do, do it. When there is nothing to do, the task is learning to sit with the uncertainty without feeding it.
6. Use mindfulness as a way to return to your life.
Mindfulness does not mean you have to become perfectly calm. It can be as simple as noticing the replay and gently returning to what is happening right now.
Imagine the rumination as background noise. It can be there without getting all of your attention. You can be washing dishes and notice, “There’s that thought again.” You can be reading in bed and notice, “My brain is replaying dinner again.”
Then bring your attention back to the dish, the book, the room you’re in, or the next small thing you need to do.
Let the Conversation Be Good Enough
I’m trying to remind myself that maybe I did say something imperfectly at dinner. Maybe there was a moment or two that felt awkward. Maybe I could have asked a better question or not overexplained so much.
But maybe that’s also just what happens when two humans are getting to know each other.
The post-conversation spiral wants us to believe we have to perform perfectly in order for someone to like us. We must never be awkward, never overshare, never be too quiet, and never say the wrong thing.
But real relationships don’t work that way. People usually don’t decide whether they like you based on one sentence or one clumsy moment.
So the next time your brain starts obsessively replaying a conversation, you don’t have to fight it. You also don’t have to believe everything it says. Pause and ask, “Am I reflecting, or am I ruminating?”
I’ll put a portion of the article right below this with a full link if you care to read.
Marvel was great because it was good guys beating the bad guys. It wasn’t a dissertation on how to be woke, queer, tranny or any other thing but a hero.
They got into a situation that seemed unwinnable and create a solution to overcome the evil of the world or universe and win.
It started out with defeating the Nazi’s. Who doesn’t like that story? The real heroes were men who overcame. That is what life is about, not seeing how woke you can be.
The audience were a bunch of geeky white guys in their parents basements believing they could be Ironman or Captain America, not BLM, flaming fags, and for sure they know there is no girl who is going to kick ass on a bad guy. It is fantasy where you imagine you are saving the world, not trying to make it gay. This is just a different them on the Bud Light story
Now, the story:
(ZeroHedge)—The saga of woke comics is the saga of woke America. Much like video games, comics and superhero movies were ignored by conservative movements as “meaningless kids stuff” until recently, which is part of the reason why those industries were so easily invaded by leftists and used to indoctrinate millions of children and teens a decade ago.
Culture is more important than politics. This is obvious. It’s a fact that leftists have understood for generations and one that conservatives have foolishly dismissed. Only in the past few years has there been a shift; at least, the progressive rampage through America’s various media institutions has been stalled and slightly reversed.
But, the most captured platforms are not going to change anytime soon, even in the face of financial decline and mass layoffs.
Disney and Marvel have recently announced a shake-up of the comics division, with over a thousand layoffs this year (after moderate layoffs over the past few years), and new executive leadership. Far-left DEI advocate Dan Buckley is on the way out. This change is being presented as a retirement, though some skeptics argue he is being forced out as part of the company’s restructuring.
Buckley replacement is not much better, however. TV Chief Brad Winderbaum is taking over as Marvel President and his track record on Marvel TV series includes some of the biggest woke failures in streaming history – Ms. Marvel (Muslim Pakistani representation), She-Hulk: Attorney at Law (feminist/meta take, which he defends as a strong performer despite critical failure), Ironheart (feminism and BLM propaganda), Echo, Agatha All Along, Wonder Man (prominent LGBT elements).
Marvel Comics, a subsidiary of Disney, has been at the forefront of far-left propaganda in content for many years, and their woke concepts are usually ported directly into Disney’s movies and streaming series. Everything from gay and trans X-Men to black Spider-Man, to female gender swaps of popular male characters have become the norm. And, books sales have flatlined in response.
Don’t get me started on Darwin vs Creationism. These guys don’t even know who is alive or extinct. It’s why I have problems with The Origin of the Species being believable
Two marsupial species scientists believed had vanished more than 6,000 years ago have been discovered alive in the remote rainforests of Western New Guinea.
The discovery was detailed in studies published in Records of the Australian Museum, according to a March 6 press release from the museum obtained by PEOPLE. Researchers identified living pygmy long-fingered possums (Dactylonax kambuayai) and the ring-tailed glider (Tous ayamaruensis) in the rainforests on the Vogelkop Peninsula of New Guinea. The animals are now considered Lazarus species, or part of the Lazarus taxon, a group of animals that have been found living after they were thought extinct and previously known only from fossils.
“The discovery of one Lazarus taxon, even if thought to have become extinct recently, is an exceptional discovery,” said lead researcher Professor Tim Flannery, an Australian Museum Distinguished Visiting Fellow. “The discovery of two species, thought to have been extinct for thousands of years, is remarkable.”
The newly released novel, Yesteryear, by Caro Claire Burke, features a tradwife who gets transported back to the 19th century to live a truly trad life. Deeply humbled by her experience, the tradwife desires to return to the present day, replete with the luxuries afforded to her by the feminists she disdains. Already a New York Times bestseller, the novel is set to be adapted for film by Anne Hathaway.
It takes little imagination to anticipate how the film adaptation will go: Much like the dystopian vision of The Handmaid’s Tale, it will amount to a scolding for those lacking gratitude for feminism. The implicit message is exactly what feminists have always insisted: conservative women who embrace domesticity are either frauds, victims, or too dim to know the difference.
I’ve been writing about feminism for more than a decade. The main opposition is almost always the same: tedious clichés and skimpy narratives. I’m told that I want women to be subjected to vile men with no way to escape or that I don’t think women should work or vote. And then, there is some effort to remind me how I have personally benefited from feminism — usually because of my doctorate, or public voice. These tired arguments, gracing comment boxes, social media, and a wide array of publications, are repetitive, unthinking, self-righteous.
Few realize that these exhausted sound bites were established decades ago to protect feminism from criticism. Media, academia, and vocal influencers pushed these talking points deeply into the culture. They’ve become so entrenched that they’ve scarcely needed adjusting from outside pressure and remain so dominant that Hollywood can bank on them. This novel and soon-to-be-movie will follow the same playbook.
What is not generally grasped is that, despite its self-assured bravado, feminism is actually a fragile ideology. Because it is not based on a solid foundation of truth, it can only survive through power, so it relies on perception, PR, and political force. In the face of decades of its corrosive effects, it can’t draw from scientific studies or even principled arguments to defend itself. All it has is a broad defensive perimeter of clichés and a tidy narrative of protection. Western women and men have been unwittingly supplying it for decades, allowing feminism to expand unchecked.
The effect has been that most people genuinely believe they are protecting something good, buying into the largely fictional narrative that feminism “is just about helping women.” Few realize its connection to the havoc now on display in the culture.
What Is Feminism?
In its simplest form, feminism is the belief in two things: Men are contemptible, and women should be just like them.
This definition isn’t a one-off found in some obscure, unknown feminist. Rather, it can be seen in the work of every major feminist leader for the last 200 years: Mary Wollstonecraft, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Simone de Beauvoir, Betty Friedan, Kate Millett, and Gloria Steinem. What is their biggest enemy? The patriarchy. And what do they want? To have the power they believe the patriarchy has.
These two ideas — men are contemptible, and women should be just like them — have been cemented together to form the bedrock of western women’s views on sex and marriage, resulting in highly destructive consequences: an ever-widening gap between men and women and steep decline in marriages, women’s battle with their fertility and bodies, increased abortions, the birth dearth, the push for same-sex marriage, surrogacy, gender fluidity and the trans movement, and the rise of anxiety and depression.
Between 5 different doctors appointments, 2 procedures under anesthesia and so many blood draws that they used all my veins on both arms, I gathered these for those who care.
Profiles of Valor: Armed Forces Day – I always thank anyone in uniform or that has a hat from a previous war (especially Viet Nam) for their services. I include the Police, firemen, EMS, ICE, and anyone who thanklessly helps the public, especially liberals who hate them (and don’t know why, other than they were told to)
Honda reported its first annual loss since becoming a publicly listed company in 1957. The $2.7B drop comes months after the Japanese carmaker scaled back its electric vehicle plans in the US. (See the scrapped models.) – no free government handout, no one buys them. Gas price goes up, people buy Hemi’s
(Note: this is an update. Will B. Done pointed out that the links didn’t work, so I fixed them so you can click and enjoy)
I’ve written this blog since August of 2005. It was originally meant for my job in analyst relations, but took a turn when I retired in 2011. It’s morphed into any number of things from humor, sarcasm, anti-Covid Jab and my ramblings on life.
I start Chemotherapy next week, so it’s going to slow down considerably, although I’ll post from time to time. I’ve scheduled some posts so it will look like I’m continuing as I suffer through the poison they will be putting in me. You’ll read something every day this week, but I’m not collecting headlines. I hope to be back, I just know I won’t have any energy
I want to say that I’ve enjoyed the 10’s of thousands of comments, and different groups of readers.
I mostly wrote it as it is my favorite form of communication. If you read anything about me, you know I’m introverted so small talk isn’t my greatest strength.
I pulled the list of top posts. It’s funny to me that my most successful post is Euphemisms for Stupid, which was number one on Google for over 10 years in that category.
As I look at the list, I see various stages of my life and different careers. I see family, pets and co-workers. I’m especially proud of My Dad. It’s the post, On Behalf of the President of the United States.
I wish you all the best and a longer life than me.
It’s not over, but for sure will not be as consistent.
If anyone wants to guest post, send it to me simonize@protonmail.com and I’ll try to put it up and give you credit.
It wouldn’t be my first choice to promote cancer awareness, but it’s quite a feat nevertheless.
ALERT: Man gets lit on fire as he pulls a police car with his pen-s in an attempt to raise awareness for prostate cancer.
John Stephenson, 50, is a strong man who, using a rope attached to his genitals, became the first person to pull a car, a 2-ton French police vehicle, with… pic.twitter.com/XgWEHFNopg
Are there more important stories we could be covering? Sure, I guess. Iran is still a thing. Trump is going to China. Democrats are being all a noun and a verb and a “raaaaaacism” over redistricting. Plus, generally speaking, when we here at the Louder with Crowder Dot Com website write about testicles, it involves a dude whipping them out in the girls’ bathroom and Democrats supporting them doing so. It’s nice to have someone put their balls to good use for a change.
John Stephenson, a 50-year-old kickboxer, shattered a glass ceiling, becoming the first bloke to pull a two-ton car with nothing but his dong WHILE set on fire. Technically, he didn’t use his entire one-eyed trouser snake, piece of pork, wife’s best friend, his Percy or his cock (he’s British, so I’m biting off of the Monty Python song). He just used his nuts. He also set himself on fire too. Why? Good question.
I’ve pulled a car with my testicles before and I’ve pulled a car on fire – so I thought why not combine the both, but this time do it with my penis.
Rest assured, everything is still intact! Stephen says that while “it did hurt quite a bit,” but he likes to set challenges and this was something no one has done before. He did the research.
“Moderate” Democrat Abigail Spanberger Considers Tax On Gym Memberships And Streaming Services, Among Other Ideas
Virginia Governor Abigail Spanberger is facing backlash after refusing to rule out new taxes on everyday services like gym memberships and streaming subscriptions, according to the Daily Mail.
During an interview with 8News, the Virginia governor was asked whether she would sign legislation expanding the state’s sales tax to cover a long list of services. Rather than rejecting the idea outright, Spanberger said any proposal that seems “reasonable” should at least be part of the conversation as lawmakers search for new sources of revenue.
Tax everything that moves and restrict people from having a life.
And then there is Zohan Mamadini. Let’s not overlook that he has a huge spread in Uganda. There is a muslim governor at the place the planes were flown into the towers 2 decades ago. Ironic, isn’t it?
Her priority is maintaining a safe space for illegal aliens and refugees. And if that interferes with the safety of vulnerable legal residents, including seniors, so be it.
None of this is a surprise. Often referred to as the Mamdani of the West during her campaign, Wilson never tried to hide her far-left world view. She once told supporters, “Yes, I am a socialist. … I’m fine with being called a socialist.”
Wilson’s indifference to the well-being of an elderly city resident reveals something about her character. Last week, she laughed at the prospect of wealthy taxpayers fleeing the city. “Bye” she said with a big grin on her face.
Seattle was already a city in decline before Wilson took office. Something tells me it’s about to get a lot worse.
Study Shows Some Humans Are Evolving To Be ‘Foxier’ – one thing is for sure, they are better than American girls in attitude alone. Feminism ruins females, and no amount of good looks makes you want to listen to them and their entitled, striving for likes online attitude.
I was one of the first Facebook accounts. When I figured out it was people putting on a false face to show you how good their life is was a lie, I had my doubts. When people whom I thought I’d gotten out of my life wanted to reconnect, I eliminated it. Now, I don’t have to be reminded of birthdays, wasted time online, and have re-disconnected with those I don’t want to talk to. There are people in my family I don’t want to see anymore, either in person or online.
I had Twitter (X) until it became a time suck, and I also retired and didn’t need it. I quit before Musk bought it when it was a cesspool of hate and censorship.
So mostly, I stay away from it to make my life better, free up my time, and keep my past in the past.
I worked in the tech industry for 3.5 decades, and I know how bad Meta, Google, Microsoft, and the rest of them are. My life is immensely better without that distraction. I knew those people, and I knew they were bad actors. I know how much they sell your personal life if you are on these platforms, so my spam is way down.
I use my blog as my social media outreach. Some read it, most don’t. I put a lot of stuff about my life on these pages about who I am, and that is enough.
For me, being an introvert, it has been a blessing. Unwanted people are out of my life digitally, and I don’t have to think about those who I thought I’d parted ways with once already.
Brits poorer than Mississippians – yes, they would be the 51st state in poverty if they were part of the US. It’s stuff like this that makes my stomach turn when Europe trashes the USA. They have no idea who they really are other than the likes of the formerly Great Britain. I know this won’t stop the America bashing, but at least there are facts out there
NFL Reporter Crissy Froyd Fired From USA Today After Criticizing Dianna Russini for Mike Vrabel Photos – It’s not like we believe the sideline reporters are there for their football knowledge. Which one of them ever played the sport. They are decorations and submission to the whold equality experiment failure. Give me a guy who had to play the game and can do a better job of explaining why a team is performing or failing. If they just want to show cute girls, pan to the cheerleaders. We’ll be happy to look at them. Get rid of the catty girls and give them a different job.
New Major Study Finds Europeans Got Smarter – This explains Rome 2000 years ago vs Africa today. You have to count the USA as Europeans becuase that is where most of them came from (except the 13% from Africa)
I was working in the finance division of Burdines Department Stores when the IBM-PC was announced. I had been working with a System 34 and immediately saw my future. This was around 1981.
The head of our DP department said there would be no need for PC’s because you couldn’t do anything with them. So I left
Within months, I was working for the largest Independent PC store in the country and balls-deep into the world of PCs.
It was the biggest open door to opportunity that I’ve seen in my whole life. I knew there was a huge future, and I was about to get in on the ground floor at the very beginning. I started with CPM on Apple II and DOS 1.0 on the PC.
They weren’t ubiquitous back then. I learned more by fixing them and figuring out why they crashed than almost everyone I knew.
The other decision I view as one of my best is to not take the COVID-19 jab. While everyone pressured me to get it, I held my ground. To this day, I don’t regret it and never have to worry about what they put into it. You can never get un-jabbed.
A Fraudulent Impeachment – It’s amazing the depths the left will stoop to to smear someone who is in their way. They act like the mafia when they want to take someone out. I’m amazed that Trump was as tough as was, holding his ground and not putting up with their shit. They did everything possible to destroy him, but failed. (note: this link got taken down. Some funny business is going on, so you know it’s true)
Golf
Do White People Even Play Golf? – It’s the same shit as regular advertising. You’d think there were no white husbands anymore either. Fortunately, this one is a get woke, go broke FAFO that’s not going well for Nike.
Well, right now, the Middle East is off my list. I think the reason why is obvious.
After reading the stories of Chris Kyle (An American Sniper) and Lone Survivor, I’m not too hip on Afghanistan. The amenities there seem a bit lacking, as is the hospitality of the tribesmen.
On a more serious note, I don’t really want to go back to Europe. I traveled there on business and vacation for decades. I’m married to a Scandinavian, so I’ve been there more times than I wanted to go.
Travel used to be a lot more fun and good until about 9/11. After that, going through airports sucks.
When I used to go to an office in Paris, London, Milan, or Cannes (and many other cities, depending on the job), the people were a lot nicer. Now, the American bashing has taken its toll on me.
Even my wife is tired of her relatives talking so much shit about the US and the American people. She doesn’t go as much as she’s fed up also, just not as much as me.
The next time an introvert in your life needs alone time, remember it’s not personal. They need solitude because that’s how they’re wired.
I love spending time alone. There’s nothing better than being at home in my comfy clothes, reading a good book, or watching a show while munching on snacks. This doesn’t mean I don’t crave time with “my people” — those I laugh with and share my day with. But when I don’t get enough alone time, I start to feel tired, cranky, and overstimulated, even if I’ve enjoyed being with the people I love.
Sometimes when I need alone time, the people in my life feel hurt. They feel rejected, but that’s not what it means. I need little periods of solitude to recharge my energy and feel like myself again.
Why do introverts need alone time? Why does socializing exhaust us, even when we’re having fun? Recent research offers some interesting insights. I delve deeper into these findings in my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts.
The Curious Connection Between Introverts and Rewards
When writing my book, I spoke with Colin DeYoung, a psychology professor at the University of Minnesota who had published a paper on introversion. He explained that one reason introverts need alone time is related to how we respond to rewards.
No, I’m not talking about the gold stars you might have earned in grade school (though it could be argued that stickers are indeed a reward for kids). For adults, rewards can be things like money, social status, social connections, food, and even sex. When you get promoted at work or convince an attractive stranger to give you their phone number, you’re receiving a reward. Hurray!
Of course, introverts also value things like money, relationships, and food. However, researchers believe that introverts are wired to respond differently to rewards than extroverts. Compared to our more outgoing counterparts, we “quiet ones” are simply less motivated and energized by these same rewards. It’s as if extroverts see big, juicy steaks everywhere, while introverts see overcooked hamburgers.
In fact, as any introvert can confirm, sometimes those “rewards” aren’t just less appealing — they can actually be tiring and annoying, like a big party. This brings me to another reason why introverts need alone time: We react differently to stimulation.
An Extrovert and an Introvert Go to a Party
Take, for example, two friends at a house party — one an extrovert, the other an introvert. They’re crammed into a crowded room where loud music blares from huge speakers. Everyone is practically shouting to be heard over the din. There are a dozen conversations happening simultaneously, with just as many things demanding their attention.
For the extrovert, this level of stimulation might feel just right. He sees potential rewards everywhere — an attractive stranger across the room, opportunities to deepen old relationships, and the chance to make new friends. Most importantly, tonight offers a chance to boost his social status within his friend group, especially if he plays his cards right.
So, the extrovert feels energized and excited to be at the party. In fact, he’s so motivated that he stays late into the night. He’s exhausted the next day and needs time to recover — after all, partying is hard work. But to him, the energy spent was well worth it.
Now, back to our introvert. See him over there, hunkered down in the corner? For him, the environment feels overwhelming. It’s too loud, there are too many things happening at once, and the crowd creates a dizzying buzz of activity. Sure, he wants to make friends, fit in, and be liked, but these rewards just aren’t as tantalizing to him. It feels like he would have to expend a lot of energy for something he’s only mildly interested in to begin with.
So, the introvert heads home early to watch a movie with his roommate. In his own apartment, with just one other person, the level of stimulation feels just right. He exchanges some texts with a woman he met a few weeks ago in one of his classes. Like the extrovert, he too wants friends and a romantic partner. However, he finds it too tiring to deal with the noise and socializing at a big party to make those connections.
The Dopamine Difference
Chemically, there’s a good reason the introvert in the above scenario feels overwhelmed, and it relates to a neurotransmitter called dopamine. This chemical, found in the brain, is often referred to as the “feel good” chemical because it regulates our pleasure and reward centers.
One of its roles is to make us notice potential rewards and motivate us to pursue them. For example, dopamine alerts the extrovert to the attractive stranger at the party and fuels his motivation to come up with a cheesy pick-up line.
Another important function of dopamine is reducing our cost of effort. Socializing requires energy because it involves paying attention, listening, thinking, speaking, and moderating our emotional reactions. Technically, socializing is tiring for everyone, including extroverts. However, dopamine helps make it less exhausting for them.
According to DeYoung, extroverts have a more active dopamine reward system. As a result, they can better tolerate — and often push through — the tiredness that inevitably comes with socializing. Much of the time, they don’t experience the same level of mental and physical fatigue that introverts do, thanks to dopamine.
It’s called the “introvert” hangover, not the “extrovert” hangover for a reason.
A New Theory of Introverts and Dopamine
In her 2002 book, The Introvert Advantage, Dr. Marti Olsen Laney speculated that introverts may be more sensitive to dopamine. In other words, we “quiet ones” might need less of it to feel good. Too much, she wrote, could leave us feeling overstimulated.
Science has come a long way since then. When I caught up with DeYoung again, he told me that theory had since been disproven. In fact, scientists now think it’s the opposite.
In fact, DeYoung told me, extroverts are the ones who are more sensitive to dopamine. For example, if introverts and extroverts are given the same drug that affects dopamine, extroverts tend to have a stronger response and become more motivated by similar stimuli later on.
It’s not that dopamine itself makes introverts feel overstimulated. Rather, when introverts do overstimulating things, like going to a party, they may not get as much dopamine release. Extroverts, on the other hand, may get a much bigger dopamine hit from those same activities.
“Without the sense of reward, the extra focus, and the sense of being ‘worth the effort’ that dopamine initiates,” DeYoung told me, “the introverts simply find the activities overwhelming and/or tiring instead.”
Extroverts Place More Significance on People
Finally, a study found that extroverts might simply find humans more interesting than introverts do. This finding aligns with the idea that introverts are less motivated to seek social rewards.
In this study, researchers observed a diverse group of individuals and recorded their brain’s electrical activity using an EEG. As participants were shown pictures of both objects and people, the researchers measured their brains’ P300 activity. This activity happens quickly in response to sudden changes around us and gets its name because it occurs within 300 milliseconds.
Interestingly, researchers found that extroverts showed the P300 response primarily when viewing images of faces, whereas introverts only exhibited this response after viewing objects. Essentially, extroverts’ brains became more active when looking at people.
This doesn’t mean that introverts hate people (though, admittedly, the human race can get on my nerves occasionally). Researchers still don’t fully understand introversion. However, these findings suggest that extroverts might simply place more importance on social interactions than introverts do.
So, the next time an introvert in your life needs alone time, remember that it’s not personal. Introverts need alone time because their brains are wired that way. It isn’t necessarily a reflection of how they feel about you or your relationship.
As for me, you can find me at home tonight. Preferably with the whole place to myself, that is.
That people were shallow. That people would peak at different times in their lives. For some, the peak was high school.
I learned that I had to try harder to be more successful than those I went to school with. To not stand still at that point in life, but to learn and grow and to unlock my fullest potential. I set my standards to be better than those I went to school with. That came to fruition.
Mostly, I learned to never look back. I closed that chapter in my life, and the best thing about it was leaving. I needed to move on in life and do more.
What Do Americans Consider Immoral? – Republicans and Democrats differ sharply on whether abortion, homosexuality and the death penalty are morally wrong
I’ve been a huge Olympics fan since 64 in Tokyo. I suffered through John Carlos and Tommie Smith in Mexico City in 68 and the terrorists in Munich in 72. I started watching during the Cold War, so the whole US vs. the USSR was going on.
I was always a track fan, especially the sprints and hurdles. I tend to miss the field events unless there was a spectacular athlete like Duplantis in the pole vault at present. I’d pick the 200 over the 100 as there is more going on with a turn involved than who can go the fastest in a straight line.
I swim for exercise, having been on swim teams as a kid. Unlike track, I like the distance events. I never miss a chance to see Katy Ledecky swim. I know her career is coming to a close sometime soon, so seeing greatness is a pleasure.
I enjoy the other events to a varying degree, but have less patience for a lot of the events.
I watched surprisingly little of the Winter Olympics this year. While I have in the past, I lost interest this year.
Delusions of Adequacy 