And You Thought You Might Have Delusions of Grandeur?

“Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself.” – Jane Wagner

It turns out that Jane was a comedy writer for Lily Tomlin. I sort of thought it was a joke but it had so much to do with the name of my blog, I’ve even put this statement in the sub-title.

I’ll stick with my title, it seems a better fit for most of the stuff that has been going on recently.

Friday Stupid Saying – About The Incompetent

“The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.” – Lawrence J. Peter

I know this is not all that witty but bear with me. The reason it is there other than it is true is that in all of my posts, I have one entitled Euphamisms for Stupid, which has been in the top 5 for Google since 2006 worldwide. It is pages and pages of these. Go get one and use it at a meeting today:

Like a pair of children’s scissors, bright and colorful, but not too sharp
Million dollar body and a 2 dollar engine.
Mind is in neutral, body is in gear
Mind like a rubber bear trap.
Needing a few screws tightened
Not firing with all spark plugs
Not the brightest light in the harbor
Not the brightest light on the Christmas tree
Not the sharpest hook in the tackle box.
Not the sharpest pencil in the box
Off his rocker
On/off switch is broken in the off position
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl
One neuron short of a synapse
One taco short of a combination plate
One turbine short of an airplane
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests
Prime candidate for natural deselection
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
Requires directions to lay sod
Room temperature IQ
Running about a quart low
Running on empty
Sets the lowest possible goals, and consistently fails to achieve them.
Sharp as a bowling ball.
She is so dumb, she couldn’t tell which way an elevator was going if she
had two guesses.

I wish I had written something of extreme intelligence that changed the course of history, but it looks like laughing at ways to say someone ain’t that bright is what it is for now.

Note: to the SJW, this post as with most of mine is made in jest. Try to have fun and not ruin the day for others.

In Honor of My 600th Post, Here Is My To Do List

WordPress says this is my 600th post, but I know I lost the year 2007 when I switched from Blogger to WordPress because I avoid Google whenever possible.  I likely passed it a while back, but they are gone forever now.

I post a lot about IQ, intelligence, Introverts, tech and a lot of subjects that would provide a platform to post something meaningful, deep in meaning , intelligent, well thought out and well written.  As they say, the road to hell….

In that spirit, I give you a to do list that is sarcastic, funny to me and given the mood I’m in as I write this and very appropriate especially since my last name is Simonds (see number 8).

When You Are A Lame Duck, You Are A Delusion of Adequacy

I originally named this blog Delusions of Adequacy after a political campaign that described themselves as not having delusions of grandeur.  I have decided (for now) to write about people, places and things that are delusional as a category.  I borrowed the idea from F1Rejects, although my writings will not be about rejects, just those who don’t realize that they fall short in others eyes.

So when do you have only delusions of adequacy?

LAME DUCKS

I read this story in the WSJ about those who were retiring/resigning and were they lame ducks.  Having witnessed it throughout my career in business and socially on a constant basis, I realized that the minute you have announced your intention to move on the perception of reality is that you are a lame duck.  Additionally, when you are not effective in others eyes, again you are a lame duck or just perhaps lame.

The article states:
despicable me photo: Despicable Me despicable-me-header.jpg

Steve Ballmer above.

Steve Ballmer tried hard to show he was no lame duck after announcing last summer that he would step down as Microsoft Corp.’s MSFT -0.59% chief executive within a year.

“If you are a lame duck, your company is not moving forward,” he said in a March 17 interview. “You don’t want to get into an inaction period.”

Amid a spate of executive departures announced many months in advance, top bosses at big companies are figuring out how to stay in charge during their long goodbyes. These lengthy lead times give boards extra time to find replacements, but they also create uncertainty within a company as workers wonder who is actually in charge and would-be successors publicly jockey for attention.

Regardless of what he says, people are sucking up to the new leader and don’t care nearly as much about Steve the minute he said he’s leaving.  Folks I know at Microsoft couldn’t wait for him to go, not to mention a good portion of the tech industry.

NOT EVEN THE PRESIDENT IS EXEMPT

Except for the liberal portion of the Democrat party, people are backing away from Obama. Those running for election, most notably Kay Hagen and Hillary Clinton who can’t get far enough away from him to get elected.

As far as getting any legislation he wants passed, the opposition controls only 1/2 of 1/3rd of the power yet he can’t get anything accomplished since his re-election.  Most presidents are lame ducks only after an election that he doesn’t win or can’t run for, but he was labeled a lame duck almost as soon as the 2012 election was complete.

Leaders around the world, most notably Iran President Rohani and Vladimir Putin aren’t showing any respect with nuclear proliferation and the Crimea respectively.  Even smaller countries like Belgium are making fun of him.  Putin has a 35 point advantage in approval and he is a criminal.

Remember the red line in Syria?  He refused to back it up.  Now leaders and terrorist factions know he is all talk.  That is an example of lame duck actions.  It also could be interpreted as all talk no action, but that is a road I don’t want to go down in this post.  Let the reader decide for themselves.

CONCLUSION

As stated by many, perception is reality.  When there is any doubt that you are a lame duck, you are.  It undermines your ability to lead and be respected.  Sometimes you announce that you are leaving, sometimes it happens because you are ineffective.  Either way, it is real.

TOP POSTS OF 2013, DEWALT AIR GUN ASSAULT RIFLE, EUPHEMISMS FOR STUPID

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 35,000 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 13 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

In 2013, there were 51 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 460 posts. There were 24 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 1 MB. That’s about 2 pictures per month.

The busiest day of the year was February 25th with 1,894 views. The most popular post that day was

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 35,000 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 13 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

In 2013, there were 51 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 460 posts. There were 24 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 1 MB. That’s about 2 pictures per month.

The busiest day of the year was February 25th with 1,894 views. The most popular post that day was:

Here is the post, click on this link

Views: 1,894?
Visitors: 1,545

Views per Visitor: 1.23

Next was WD-40  interesting facts

9/11 facts and pictures was next most popular

How to be happy

 

My all time number one hit though in any search engine, especially Google is:

Euphemisms for Stupid, because it is funny and witty.