sayings

Murphy’s Mother’s Laws

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Another long lost post.

Murphy’s mothers laws

  • Mothers only offer advice on two occasions: when you want it and when you don’t..
  • A mother’s love is a better cure than chicken soup, but chicken soup is cheaper.
  • Your mother is the only person that knows more about you than you know about yourself.
  • Any time you are unable to solve a problem, ask your mother. She probably won’t know either, but she will fake it.
  • Maternal instinct is stronger than any force known except an IRS collection agent.
  • The more you try to stay on your mother’s good side the harder it will be to figure out which side this is.
  • The nicer a mother is, the greater the probability that her kids are rotten.
  • If you can’t remember whether or not you called your mother, you didn’t.
  • The motherly advice you ignore will always turn out to be the best advice she ever gave you.
  • If you forget, mom will remind you of all your mistakes so you don’t repeat them.
  • Anything you do can be criticized by your mother – even doing nothing.
  • Never criticize your mother’s cooking if you expect to get any more of it.
  • If you think you have any secrets from your mother, remember who has changed your diapers.
  • You can’t “out mother” your mother. Don’t even try.
  • Never lie to your mother. And if you do, never think you got away with it.
  • The harder you try to hide something from your mother, the more she resembles a webcam.
  • The older you are, the more you feel like a child around your mother.
  • All mother’s have a “How To” manual. That’s because they wrote the book.
  • Mother’s way is best. If you don’t believe it, ask her.
  • Everything is a good idea till you mother finds out and tells you why it isn’t.
  • One mother is company, two is a psychic reading, three is a hen party, four is a bridge club.
  • If you don’t have time to study the drivers’ manual, drive your mother somewhere and get a quick refresher course.
  • When you are broke, ask mom for a loan. She will help you remember what you wasted all your money on.
  • The more expensive the gift you give your mother, the longer she will “save” it before she uses it.
  • No matter how wrong you are, your mother will not hold it against you. She may remind you a number of times, but she will not hold it against you.
  • No matter how much you eat, you can never get so fat that mother will not offer you more food.
  • If a mother does not have an item, she will have the recipe or the directions.
  • The more times mother reminds you to take an umbrella, the greater the probability of rain.
  • Accomplishments are made possible by your mother – failures are your own fault.
  • Never forget who rocked you as a baby. That’s something else you will never be able to repay her for.
  • Mother can always tell you a better way to do something after you’ve already done it.
  • The longer it’s been since you cleaned house, the more likely it is that mother will visit.
  • No matter how small your mom is, she will always be bigger than you are.
  • The more you detest an item that belongs to your mother, the more likely it is that she will try to give it to you.
  • If you do it yourself, mom could have done it better. If mom does it, you should have done it yourself.
  • You never are as good as other people’s children. You are never as bad as mom imagines.
  • The only thing more accurate than a mother’s advice is her memory of the times you didn’t take it.
  • The funnier the joke is, the more likely mom will think it is dirty.
  • Never tell your mother you have nothing to do. She can always find something.
  • If the job of a mother is going smoothly, she thinks she isn’t doing it well.
  • There are always two sides to a story – the way it really happened and the way mother remembers it.
  • Mothers always “know.” We don’t know how – they just do.
  • Murphy’s mother told him so.

This article was written by Sheila Moss, from Humor Columnist.Com and copied with her permission.
Copyright 2001 Sheila Moss

  • a child will never ask Mom to get something until she sits down.
    Corollary – a child will only ask for a glass of milk after you put the milk carton back in the refrigerator.
    Sent by Lexia Gibson
  • Call your Mom
    Sent by Nikki Hubbell-VanHoosear
  • If your kid grows up to be like you its an insult, not to you, to the kid
    Sent by Mohammed Ram jackson
  • You can fool some people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, but you can’t fool Mum
    Sent by Meself
  • Small, teething children will chew on the most valuable thing within reach. The same goes for puppies and juvenile tigers, bears, or crocodiles.
    Sent by -?Anonymous!
  • If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.

An Introvert On Arguing

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The biggest problem I have in my arguments is timing. I get out talked by people who tend to be wrong. Only later does the truth come out or I can express myself, but no one (except me) cares by then.

Like most introverts, I think things through, throw out the things that are wrong, then come up with a salient and correct argument. All of this is well after the discussion took place.

LESSONS LEARNED

While being pressured to get the jab during Covid, I knew it was wrong and listened to everyone regurgitating the media and government lies (paid for by the Big Pharma companies). Since I was an island, it was everyone against me. There was nothing I could say that anyone would listen to other than my black friends. They remembered Tuskegee like I did.

The lesson? Stop trying to be right, learn patience for the facts to come out. They are coming out now.

This would have also helped me a lot earlier in life if I’d have known. I didn’t understand that I was an introvert though and thought I could go toe to toe with extrovert talkers not afraid to be wrong. I lost a debate to an imbecile in 8th grade when I clearly had the facts. He had the class popularity and the class went with him as he made up stuff.

It was similar in politics. The 2016 election won me a $100 bet, not that anyone cared. The 45th President continues to be right, so they just throw dirty underwear against the wall until something sticks. He is the comeback champion in rhetoric though so I stopped talking about that also. I was an island politically also. I lost every discussion on that one also even though my facts were proven right over time.

I found out that a lot of people don’t have a sense of history or really understand anything other than reading and repeating talking points they are told to think. Social media is making idiots out of the next generations. Knowing how to find information is not the same thing as understanding why things are the way they are.

I was already recognizing the pattern of facts that led to the truth, just not when I wanted it. I’d never make it as a lawyer or politician.

Maybe that’s why I write about this. It gets my thoughts (mostly cogently) in order and documents my position. It’s all I have sometimes. Since the internet is forever, here you go in the future if you read this.

Very rarely in my life do I have the proper comeback. It’s not satisfying when I do compared to the frustration of not being drop quick witted and precise information when needed.

So, I just have decided to let some stuff pass. It gets me out of talking to the under educated anyway.

The other lesson?

“Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

― Mark Twain

Red Pilling Socialism

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Every election cycle, politicians become Santa Claus and promise free stuff. That is what caused the inflation we are in.

A lot of the truth is they never delivered on the promises, but kept the voting block on the plantation hoping for handouts. Covid let them get more free money than some could by going back to work.

The bill comes due. Those in DC, Davos and other nefarious places want a monarchy, a dictatorship, socialism where they decide how much you will be given by how well you obey.

Russia, China, North Korea, Cuba, Venezuela all went down the path the current administration is on, and is backed up by the squad, pocahontas, Bernie, California/Oregan/Washington…..need I go on?

Don’t put on the handcuffs of promises of free. Nothing is free.

Freedom is especially not free.

Don’t choose government handouts that will cost our country. It’s already taxed the middle class through inflation.

Euphemisms for Stupid

/ John / 4 Comments

This is the first update in a while, but it was well worth it.  If I missed one, please comment and I’ll include it.

 

If one of these offends you, take the complaints elsewhere, I’m the one that got dissed here.

A beer short of a six pack
A brick short of a load
A couple of eggs shy of a dozen
A couple of gallons short of a full tank
A few ants short of a picnic
A few beers short of a six-pack
A few bricks short of a pile
A few bricks short of a wall
A few cards short of a deck
A few clowns short of a circus.
A few feathers short of a whole duck
A few fries short of a Happy Meal
A few peas short of a casserole
A few tomatoes short of a good thick sauce

A few soldier short of a squad
A few trucks short of a convoy
A fortune cookie short of a Chinese dinner
A pepperoni short of a pizza
A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on
A sandwich short of a picnic
A train short of a full service?
About as bright as a burnt out 20 watt light bulb.
About as useful as a chocolate fireguard
Ah say, that boy reminds me of Paul Revere’s ride; a little light in the
belfry
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity
An intellect rivalled only by garden tools
As much use as a hedgehog in a condom factory
As much use as an ashtray on a motorcycle
As quick as a tortoise on Prozac
As smart as bait

As smart as Joe Biden
As useful as a screen door on a submarine
As useful as a wooden frying pan
As useful as tits on a bull
Body by God, Mind by Mattel.
Bright as Alaska in December
Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel

Could screw up a one car funeral
Doesn’t have both oars in the water
Doesn’t have all his corn flakes in one box
Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash
Doesn’t have all the dots on his dice
Donated his body to science before he was done using it
Dumb as a corn cob.
Dumb as a stump.
Dumber than a bag of hammers.
Dumber than a bag of rocks

Dumber than a lobotomized rock

Elevator don’t quiet make the top floor
Fell out of the family tree
Forgot to pay his brain bill
Goes surfing in Nebraska
Golf bag doesn’t have a full set of irons
Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together
Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn’t watching
Gross ignoramus — 144 times worse than a normal ignoramus
Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt

This is the one —> Has delusions of adequacy.

Has two brains, one’s lost and the other is out looking for it
Having an intelligence rivalled only by garden tools.
He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down
He had a little too much chlorine in his gene pool.
He is so dumb, he would look for a wishbone in a soft-boiled egg.
He is so dumb, the only thing he ever read was an eye-chart.
He played too much without a helmet
He’s got a mind like a steel trap, rusted shut
He’s got a leak in his think-tank
He’s got a mind like a steel sieve
He’s got his feet firmly planted 3 feet above the ground
He’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer
He’s so dense light bends around him
He’s so dumb he couldn’t pour the water out of a boot if the instructions
were on the heel
His belt doesn’t go through all the loops
His cheese has slipped off his cracker

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork
His porch light ain’t on
I say, that boy is about as sharp as a sack of wet mice
If brains were chocolate – he wouldn’t have enough to fill an M&M
If brains were dynamite – he wouldn’t have enough to blow his nose
If brains were dynamite, he wouldn’t have enough to blow his hat off
If brains were gasoline, he couldn’t ride a moped around a fruit loop
If brains were taxed, he’d get a rebate
If he had a brain, he’d be dangerous
If he had another brain, it would be lonely
If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week
If stupid were a talent, he would be considered gifted

If stupid could fly, you’d be a jet.
If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change back
If you stand close enough to him you can hear the ocean
Isn’t firing on all 6 cylinders
Isn’t firing on all thrusters
Its hard to believe that he beat out half a billion other sperm

If I wanted to kill myself I’d climb your ego and jump to your IQ
Kangaroo loose in the top paddock
Like a pair of children’s scissors, bright and colorful, but not too sharp
Million dollar body and a 2 dollar engine.
Mind is in neutral, body is in gear
Mind like a rubber bear trap.
Needing a few screws tightened
Not firing with all spark plugs
Not the brightest light in the harbor
Not the brightest light on the Christmas tree
Not the sharpest hook in the tackle box.
Not the sharpest pencil in the box
Off his rocker
On/off switch is broken in the off position
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl
One neuron short of a synapse
One taco short of a combination plate
One turbine short of an airplane
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests
Prime candidate for natural deselection
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
Requires directions to lay sod
Room temperature IQ
Running about a quart low
Running on empty
Sets the lowest possible goals, and consistently fails to achieve them.
Sharp as a bowling ball.
She is so dumb, she couldn’t tell which way an elevator was going if she
had two guesses.
She is so dumb, when I asked her to pass the plate, she said: “Upper or
lower?”
She’s not tied too tight to the pier
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled
Strong like bear, smart like tractor.
Takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch 60 minutes
The elevator is stuck between floors.
The lights are flashing, the gate is down, but the train isn’t coming
The lights are on, but nobody is home.
The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead
Too dumb to pull his head in before he shuts the window
Too many yards between the goal posts
Two hub caps short of a Buick.
Warning – Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear
Was left on the tilt-a-whirl too long as a baby
Would be out of her depth in a mud puddle.
Your the flower of my life (you blooming idiot)
You can’t call him an idiot, you’ll insult all the idiots in the world.

Your mouth is writing checks that your intellect cannot cash

One of my favorite Far Side Cartoon’s ever

Midvale School for the Gifted: Today's Government | Trade the Tape

Now That I’m Grown, What Did I Get For What I Wished For?

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I’ve been reminiscing about when I was young. I’d flit from one thing to the next, never worrying about what was around the next corner. I didn’t plan for tomorrow unless it included fun or something for me to do that wouldn’t affect my retirement.

Now, I can’t take a dump without working out what I’m going to do next and plan my time around it.

My kids are grown now, but I told them to not grow up too fast. They all have mortgages, plus pets and kids that rely on them, like they did on me.

I hurt a lot more now. I’m sore from my first round of golf of the year yesterday, and I didn’t even go at it that hard.

Life.

This Happens To Me A Lot

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Being an introvert, I get along well with pets, especially dogs, and surprisingly little kids.

The kids thing is they haven’t been ruined by adults yet, and are sort of like pets.

It’s people I have the most trouble with. Most of that trouble is just not wanting to be around them or small talk if I don’t have to.

Pets are great and we understand each other.

Introvert Stuff – Blaise Pascal On Being Alone

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“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone,” Blaise Pascal wrote in the 17th century.

I like others and have socialized for many decades, but given the choice I’d rather be alone.

I watch people who don’t know what to do with themselves if they are alone. Now, a lot of people don’t know what to do with themselves without a phone.

Instead of looking at it as withdrawing from others, I view it as learning to enjoy the time alone and discover the real me.

Writing has been invaluable to me. I write here, but my diaries are hundreds of thousands of words that are how I find out who I am and how to cope with the day to day issues. It helps me put my thoughts together before I have to face people because most can out talk me before I can put my thoughts together cogently.

Once you have mastered the ability to be alone, you have freed yourself from the bonds of others to live life on your own terms.

Why I’m Suspicious When Things Go Right Too Often – AKA The Fuckening

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My Mom said that life is about overcoming obstacles, climbing mountains and clearing hurdles. You are either in a crisis, just finished with one or about to start another.

That’s why I’ve learned that when too many things are going good, then this:

I used to live in bliss and then get blindsided as to how things can go wrong. When I was dating, there were times that I had a different girl for every day of the week and said no to others. Not long after that, it seems that even the professionals wouldn’t take my money.

I’d have 3 job offers waiting for me while I loved the job I was at, or I hated my job and no one would even give me an interview.

Now, when I’m feeling on top of the world, I start to prepare for what might be around the corner.

It sounds pessimistic, but I’ve realized that my Mom was right. Just wait long enough and you’ll have a challenge to overcome.

Sunday Sayings

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I’ve written these down on Sunday’s, obviously from portions of sermons, but they have a lot to do with a meaningful life.

Don’t be rich in the world and poor towards God.

It is only by thinking clearly about the future that you will live wisely in the present.

You are not defined by your sin when forgiven.

God’s purposes doesn’t depend on our preferences.

Worry – placing faith in the worst outcome.

Finding a solution is different than solving the problem.

Some gifts are valuable because of the good they can do in the world. Others are valuable for the statement they make about the heart of the giver and worth of God for whom they are given.

Sometimes you miss the most obvious things because your heart isn’t tuned to it.

Thinking about Jesus doesn’t mean you know him or the bible.

If you look for Jesus he will show himself to you and give you life, peace and hope.

On Turning The Clocks Back Soon

/ John / 1 Comment

I’m smart enough to never have listened to a song by her (that I’m aware of). The drugs affected John and her by then and there wasn’t much to listen to. He was better with the Beatles. She was never good.

It doesn’t affect me as much anymore because my age gets me up whenever it feels like it. I (for the most part) don’t have to get up for anything. I agreed with my golfing partner not to get up too early for a tee time next round. Not being rushed is a great thing at this point in life.

I don’t miss early meetings, e-mail road rage or having to get the kids ready for school. That is for young people.

Here is a guide on how to set each of your devices for DST. You’ve been warned if you click on it. You’ll get another dose of sarcasm.

It’s Not Friday, Three horrible Facts, And a Silver Lining

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Three Horrible Facts 1 Today Is Not Friday 2 Tomorrow Is ...

But, I’m retired so everyday is Saturday for me. I don’t have deadlines or conference calls or personnel issues today. Man I don’t miss work.

I don’t miss Facebook that went down yesterday. I didn’t even know it until I read about it. I’m glad to have that ball and chain out of my life also.

I have a brother-in-Law who is retired not by choice, but defined his life by his job. He doesn’t know what to do. I feel sorry for him. Life is much greater than your job.

For now, I’ll pet my dog and enjoy what comes next.

Random Funny Thoughts

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I had amnesia once — or twice.

*****

Protons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

*****

I am neither for nor against apathy.

*****

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.

*****

If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.

*****

What is a “free” gift? Aren’t all gifts free?

*****

They told me I was gullible and I believed them.

*****

Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home, and when he grows up, he’ll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.

******

Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.

*****

One nice thing about egotists … they don’t talk about other people.

*****

My weight is perfect for my height … which varies.

*****

I used to be indecisive. Now, I’m not sure.

*****

The cost of living hasn’t affected its popularity.

*****

How can there be self-help groups

*****

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants off.

*****

Is it just me, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

Tuesday Saying, Who Are The Normal People – Joe Ancis

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“The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.”

I swear this is true. I’ve found that everyone has a story. Some people call it skeletons, but when you hear about their lives, it weaves together who they really are. Pretty soon, you have to decide if they are worth it.

There are generally patterns to people and they repeat them, almost predictably. The more you find out, the less you want to do with them, except certain activities you can stand to do together.

There are some that overlook a lot of stuff because they wish to be with someone. That’s why people flock to celebtards for example.

I had to deal with a lot of famous people in my life. After spending only a little time with them, I couldn’t wait to get away.

Fortunately, there are a few people who truly who have a list of qualities that are better than their bad ones. I hope you can find a few.

The rest are people who are people. They show themselves to be who they are. You just learn about it over time. You have to decide if you will be putting up with or they need to be eliminated from your life to avoid being poisoned.

Then there is Mauerbauertraurigheit, or pulling away from groups that just need cleansing from your life.

Finally, examine yourself. You probably are that person to others. I guess try not to be, but don’t fake it, be yourself. If you don’t belong, don’t. If one of you is not normal and it’s not the other person, it’s you.

Will Rogers On Ingorance

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“You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.”

We all are smart at something (the converse is true about the other things). For that we grant ourselves superiority status that bleeds to other things that aren’t always our best subjects.

That led to the next saying. “Here, hold my beer”. We all know how that turns out.

It’s ok to say you don’t know about something. It ends some conversations based on competing knowledge, some of which could actually be true.

I look at the experts on what is happening in the world and wonder if some of these people have overstepped their boundaries…….Like this one:

Alina Chan, a biologist at the Silver lab at the Harvard School of Medicine

Chan is one of 18 scientists who finally admitted in the journal of Science last month that the Wuhan coronvirus likely originated in a Wuhan, China virology lab.

Chan says liberal scientists lied to the American public for months about their beliefs on the origination of the virus to not be associated with the President who was trying to save lives.

Story Telling, Why The Marvel Movies Were So Successful

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“It’s not enough to bash in heads. You’ve got to bash in minds.” Joss/Zack/Jed Whedon

There are really a lot of reasons it was successful, but being able to tell a story is what enthralls people. It doesn’t have to be Marvel really, it has to be a good story.

What they are referring to is anyone can make a fight scene, or imitate someone else in real life. This isn’t hard. Weaving the fight into the story arc is the art.

Not every story has a happy ending. Sometimes, a character has to die. In life, some sacrifices for the better good must be made. That could include you as the sacrifice.

It is also about hard choices that divide allegiances. It is a no win and usually a blurred line as to where the divide between right and wrong exists.

Telling the story that involves emotions is always better than just stating facts.

Friday Saying – From a Rocket Scientist

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If you stick to the convenient, you’ll never find the unexpected. – Ozan Varol

He writes well and is an incredibly interesting person and his book How to think like a rocket scientist is a good read.

Here is where he drops the hammer:

It’s only through the inconvenient and the unfashionable that you’ll find diverse inputs that will expand your thinking and spur your imagination.

Wednesday Saying – Is The USA Dying?

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It's interesting sometimes to read about the last days of past civilizations. It's hard not to notice during these readings that those last days were filled with completely irrational ideas and behaviors that could not be explained in any way outside of a mass collapse of reason. - David Horowitz

I’ve heard it said that governments based on a republic have an average life span of about 200 years throughout history. That means America is in overtime.

Other nations have been unable to unseat the USA as the de-facto world leader by force, so they are using the 5th column instead. Here is the definition of the 5th column -> Link to 5th column.

I have chosen to not be political, rather than observe patterns and history on this one.

Friday Stupid Saying – About The Incompetent

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“The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.” – Lawrence J. Peter

I know this is not all that witty but bear with me. The reason it is there other than it is true is that in all of my posts, I have one entitled Euphamisms for Stupid, which has been in the top 5 for Google since 2006 worldwide. It is pages and pages of these. Go get one and use it at a meeting today:

Like a pair of children’s scissors, bright and colorful, but not too sharp
Million dollar body and a 2 dollar engine.
Mind is in neutral, body is in gear
Mind like a rubber bear trap.
Needing a few screws tightened
Not firing with all spark plugs
Not the brightest light in the harbor
Not the brightest light on the Christmas tree
Not the sharpest hook in the tackle box.
Not the sharpest pencil in the box
Off his rocker
On/off switch is broken in the off position
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl
One neuron short of a synapse
One taco short of a combination plate
One turbine short of an airplane
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests
Prime candidate for natural deselection
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
Requires directions to lay sod
Room temperature IQ
Running about a quart low
Running on empty
Sets the lowest possible goals, and consistently fails to achieve them.
Sharp as a bowling ball.
She is so dumb, she couldn’t tell which way an elevator was going if she
had two guesses.

I wish I had written something of extreme intelligence that changed the course of history, but it looks like laughing at ways to say someone ain’t that bright is what it is for now.

Note: to the SJW, this post as with most of mine is made in jest. Try to have fun and not ruin the day for others.

After Election Saying – How To Move On

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The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next. – Mignon McLaughlin

People familiar with addiction will recognize this.  Sometimes you just have to make it to the next goal in front of you because the whole view of what is going on in life can be overwhelming at times.

You can make this little accomplishment and then the next.  You build on these small steps and you’ve made it through whatever you’re going through, even if it is the election

Monday Election Saying

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“The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away.” – Ronald Reagan

I saved this gem as election day is tomorrow. For the most part, it’s 90% true. The only difference in this election is that one of the candidates was stolen from the business world.

Monday Saying – Start Your Week By Conquering Fear

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“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” – Nelson Mandela

“Being terrified but going ahead and doing what must be done—that’s courage. The one who feels no fear is a fool, and the one who lets fear rule him is a coward.” – Piers Anthony

“A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

This says it better than I can. Everyone is afraid at some point. Learn to use fear as a fuel to fight against it and you can learn to overcome it.

Facing your fears means just that. If you run away, you will be afraid from then on until you deal with it.

Wednesday Saying – Will Rogers On The Government

/ John / 1 Comment

I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Reagan once said the nine most dangerous words in the English language are I’m from the Government and I’m here to help.

Groucho Marx said suppose I was from Congress, and suppose I was an idiot, but that would be redundant.

I think you get the drift and incompetence is what protects us against the government right now.

Monday Saying – The Secret Of Life

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“The whole secret of life is to be interested in one thing profoundly and in a thousand things well.” – Horace Walpole

I just finished a conversation with a successfully retired executive. He told me the secret to retirement is to keep your life uncomplicated. These two are related.

If you do something really well are paid for it, you hit the lottery. If it is one of your 1000 things, you still are ok. If you are hating your job and don’t something you do well you might be a dumbass.

Life is too short to not enjoy what you are doing. Sure, we have to do things we don’t want to, but not all the time.

If you do this, your life will be a lot easier than swimming upstream doing something you don’t like and aren’t good at. There is nothing wrong with tenacity, as long as it is combined with intelligence.

The moral of the story is don’t be a dumbass.

Monday Saying – When To Shut Up

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I have noticed that nothing I never said ever did me any harm. – Calvin Coolidge

I heard another version that went never miss a good opportunity to shut up.

I liked how Coolidge spoke after he thought. That way, he didn’t have to say that much and got right to the point. Others knew he wasn’t going to waste their time with BS so when he talked, they listened.

Still, most of you, cut the crap and the small talk. It’s a waste of time and is annoying.

Friday Saying – How To Build Your Reputation

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You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.” – Henry Ford

It’s true, you can really only promise to do something once and get fully believed, unless you do what you promised.

The bane of Introverts is small talk and inevitably, during small talk comes promises or boasting of things one will absolutely do. I’m more surprised when they actually do what is promised than by the cheap words now.

Yes, you are being judged by what you do, and probably fairly. Don’t make a promise you can’t keep. Better yet, keep your mouth shut unless you’ve already delivered on the promise.

Tuesday Saying – How To Appreciate Life

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Maybe you have to know the darkness before you can appreciate the light.  – Madelline L’Engel

Some have to reach their rock bottom to recover from disease, broken heart, addiction or whatever the poison is.  Everyone has a story.

Going through it, recovering or learning how to live with the darkness is when you grow.  Admitting what is bothering you is a good first step, but we move on and deal with things our own way.

You sure appreciate how much you have when you think how little time you have to enjoy it.  Choose light and not darkness.

 

Monday Saying – Why Not To Trust Social Media

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The only source of information for most people now is a machine that is designed to partially inform people, misinform people, spread conspiracy theories, and lies faster than facts.”- Tristan Harris
The alternate view by Mark Manson is this:

Social media algorithms do not manipulate and push users into believing awful things. People already believe the awful things and social media simply spreads them more easily. Critics like Harris imply that tech companies are sitting in Silicon Valley scheming for ways to extract more ad dollars from people’s anxiety and misinformation.

Either way, it points out that there isn’t that much good to it the way it exists. At best it is a time waster for most.  At worst it is the above.

I say think for yourself and stop believing the group think on Twitter, Fakebook, Instagram and the other time suck platforms.
They could be a a useful tool for sharing pertinent information, but it just isn’t that way.   There is so much out there that spending more than 5 minuted a day on this probably isn’t helping your life.

I’ll leave you with this thought.

Thursday Saying – Success By The Author of Fight Club

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“In truth, the degree of anyone’s success depends on how often they can say the word yes and hear the word no.” – Chuck Palanuik

 

Some people stop at no.  Not me.  If you want to succeed, you have to just look at that as a stepping stone to overcome.  Life is about overcoming.  That gives us the greatest satisfaction.  It’s not likes on social media.  It’s when we dig deep, think clearly, seek help and pull ourselves up to victory from the jaws of defeat that gives us the greatest sense of accomplishment.

They’ll say yes sooner or later if you don’t take no for an answer.

Wednesday Saying – Mark Twain On What The World Owes You

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Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. – Mark Twain

 

I wasn’t sure if this should have been a sarcasm post instead of a saying.  Why?  Everyone, especially sports stars, rioters, news makers and celebrities seem to think that they are owed something.  They are like the rest of us, the world owes you nothing.

You are what you make of yourself and the sum of your choices that got you where you are.  That means the responsibility for life is yours to either buck up or suffer for not pulling your share.  The responsibility is yours and no one else’s.  Except for some circumstances that are random or uncommon, ou can take either the credit or blame for where you are in life.

My advice is to do good, stop blaming anyone else and make good choices.

Tuesday Saying – The Price You Pay For Your Profession

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“The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.” – James Baldwin

 

Someone said find your passion and you’ll never work a day in your life.  This is not true.  Sooner or later we become victims of routine or more likely other people will make your job a pain.

This is the ugly side.  At some point even Michael Jordan had to retire, but he still can’t go to a restaurant without people bothering him.

Enjoy what you have and be glad you get to do it.

Friday Saying – How To Win by Paul Tournier

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Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can. – Paul Tournier

 

Rocket Scientist Ozan Varol wrote this about winning:

1. You think you can’t do something.

2. You’re forced to do it (or you’re brave enough to try).

3. You find out that you actually can.

Winning is a habit.  Seals and champions know how to win by practice and banning any thoughts of giving up.   A lot of winning (or just succeeding, which is a win for some) is beating your mind.  When you give yourself positive thoughts and remember how you’ve achieved success in the past you’ve accomplished a lot of the battle.

Life is a fight sometimes.  It is always a fight for some.  Winners don’t win by accident.  They learn how to win, but they thought they were going to win.

In an interview about being in the zone, Hall of Fame players were asked about being in the zone.  Most said it happened once in a while but couldn’t predict it.  Dan Marino said he was in the zone for 17 years because he thought he could win.

Don’t give up.  Take the challenge bit by bit and be a winner.

Tuesday Saying – Life, by Charlie Chaplin

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Charlie Chaplin lived 88 years.
He left us 4 statements:
(1) Nothing is forever in this world, not even our problems.
(2) I love walking in the rain because no one can see my tears.
(3) The most lost day in life is the day we don’t laugh.
(4) Six best doctors in the world…:
1. The sun,
2. Rest,
3. Exercise,
4. Diet,
5. Self-respect
6. Friends.
Stick to them at all stages of your life and enjoy a healthy life…
If you see the moon, you will see the beauty of God…
If you see the sun, you will see the power of God…
If you see a mirror, you will see God’s best creation. So believe it.
We are all tourists, God is our travel agent who has already identified our routes, bookings and destinations… trust him and enjoy life.
Life is just a journey! Therefore, live today!
Tomorrow may not be.

Monday Sayings – Since It’s Election Season, This Is How Politicians Do It

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If you can’t convince them, confuse them. – Harry S. Truman

Big words seldom accompany good deeds. – Charlotte Whitton

 

I put two quotes today because they represent the BS that comes from most politicians, from either party.

In reality, most of them are lawyers so they are smart enough to pass both law school and the Bar.  That means they know they are full of it and know that they are saying exactly nothing most of the time.

As with most things, actions speak louder than words.  Some politicians just talk.  A few of them actually make and keep promises.  That should help you judge who to support, regardless of your position on right or left, D or R.

As always, use your mind and make good decisions.  Don’t listen to others or the MSM/News/Social Media to tell you what to believe or how to act.

Friday Saying – Why Introspection Is So Important

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“No man remains quite what he was when he recognizes himself.” – Thomas Mann

 

Once you take your guard down and truly admit who you are, you get to see the person that is you.  It’s doubtful that you’ll ever show this person to others except on a deathbed, but once you see yourself as you view and judge others.

We think we are invincible and nearly immortal when we are young, but the scars of life take it’s toll as do the decisions we make or avoid and we aren’t who we think we are.

As we age, inside we still see ourselves as the younger version until things start breaking down, but Zoom meetings will show you that age is taking it’s toll.  Maybe that is why some hide their looks with makeup.

Great Sayings – On Why Being Prepared Affects Your Luck

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The winds and the waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators. – Edward Gibbon

 

I’ve heard a version of this that goes, “The harder I work and prepare, the luckier I am”.

Sure every pig finds an acorn once in a while, but nothing beats being prepared for most outcomes, situations and other events.  Yes, the more you do something, the more experience you have to call upon to guide you.  The only gotcha is human emotion and interaction.  That is never predictable in the outcome.

Fortunately, you can at least anticipate that this is going to happen and how you will react.

There you go.  It was 3 sayings in one for today, enjoy.

Friday Saying – John Glenn On Birthdays

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There is still no cure for the common birthday.

I’m cursed with sharing a birthday with Madonna.  If you’ve read any of my recent posts my loathing for celebrities is evident.

Elvis died on my birthday.  While the world was sorry for the loss, it saves me from the blight of the above.

Everyone shares a birthday with a lot of people.  I wonder who has the best share??

Great Sayings – Why We Strive In Life, Not For Participation Trophies

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“Don’t do what you want. Do what you don’t want. Do what you’re trained not to want. Do the things that scare you the most.” – Chuck Palahniuk, Author of “Fight Club”

 

The more difficult the struggle, the greater satisfaction from the accomplishment. That saying is from both my Mother and me.

No one gives a rats ass about a participation trophy.  We want to win.  To win you have to struggle, train, learn and fight for what you want.  Look at what athletes do to attain victory.  There is only one winner and second place is first loser.

There is only one CEO, but that person sacrificed along the way in time, travel and lack of attention to their family.

Dedication, training and commitment to any goal is necessary to achieve and succeed.

Overcoming what you are afraid of is and equal victory.  The sense of satisfaction we get from beating our demons is as great for some as is winning a competition or succeeding in life.  We were made to overcome obstacles in life and learn from that struggle.

Don’t give up or give in.  Relish the sweet sense of victory or vanquishing what held you back.

 

Friday Saying – A Different If A Tree Falls In The Forrest Point Of View, Mensa Version

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Even if one tree falls down it wouldn’t affect the entire forest. Chen Shui-bian

 

Yes, the one we know is “If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it does it make a sound?”, but in a way the above one is more correct.

Of course it makes a sound, but unless it is a forest of one, it doesn’t affect the forest.  The reason is that life goes on.  We are all trees in the forest of life, but we are born, live and then die.  Most are forgotten, but that is the way of life.  What is it’s meaning and what is your contribution to society, family or….?

Here’s a quick test to see what you’ve done.  Write your own obituary.  You’ll see what you’ve contributed and what you have done.

Which brings me to my favorite Mensa joke.  What is the meaning of life, give 3 examples.  Those who understand it will get it.

Monday Saying – Why You Should Be Brave Enough To Say Yes or No (bonus for Introverts)

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“In truth, the degree of anyone’s success depends on how often they can say the word yes and hear the word no.” – unknown.

 

Many are afraid of what others will think if they divert from their principles and don’t give the real answer.  It would save both parties a lot of time and angst if you would just be honest.

For Introverts, this is the best conversation.  It cuts through the BS small talk about why you can or can’t do something and gives the appropriate answer.  You’ll be respected for getting to the point quickly and will feel better about yourself for being honest.

Some, albeit a few might get their feelings hurt, but it will pass once they see you have done the right thing.  Many will appreciate that you gave them a straight answer, even if it isn’t dressed up and decorated with flowers and bows before you dance around your answer.

Say it, Yes or No.  Then move on to a deeper conversation.

Friday Saying – Einstein On Success and Perserverance

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I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right.

 

Many have heard this as if at first you don’t succeed try, try again.  While this is true, it assumes that you can just force success.

As we know, Einstein could see things through his thinking that few could fathom.  This was finesse rather than force.  Nevertheless, this does show that he never gave up and continued despite setbacks.

That is the lesson, don’t give up just because you didn’t get it right the first time.  Will you come up with the Theory of Relativity?  It’s doubtful, but you just might find meaning in your life.

Thursday Quote – Nietzsche On Social Media and Peer Pressure

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The surest way to corrupt a youth is to tell them to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently.

Nietzsche hated “the Herd”. He was often writing against the ideas and ways of the masses in favor of the free thinker who has risen above them. This statement is a clear example of this worldview.

Who are the herd?  They are social media telling you what to think, say, speak and what your values should be.  They are the MSM, celebtards and sports stars who want to force their values on you because of an outdated construct that equates fame with power.

Think for yourself and don’t be afraid to say it.  Don’t be a dumb ass though and say it when you are surrounded by Antifa or the rioters.  There is no reasoning with them right now and even agreeing with them can get you an ass whooping.

Don’t take your views from the media.  Almost no entity is more biased at this point.  Don’t succumb to pressure from social media.  That is just the new high school for the in crowd.  Be your own person instead and think for yourself.

Nietzsche is not wrong about the herd.  You’ll never respect yourself if you think like the herd just to be one of them. It isn’t worth it.

It is a smart person who avoids trouble, but chooses wisely when and where to take a stand for his values.

Wednesday Saying – Nietzsche on Suffering

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What does not kill me, makes me stronger.

For Nietzsche, psychological growth is one of the most important things there is. Experiences do not have to be pleasurable to be good for us. Often it is suffering which gives meaning to our lives. By gaining experiences, good or bad, we grow as people, so long as we survive them, of course.

This quote is usually said as a quip, rather than to understand it’s true meaning.  Navy Seals fully understand this and what it takes to not give up even when you want to and it is the easy path to take.

File this under the school of hard knocks, of which I have a Ph.D.

Friday Saying – John Wooden On Life

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All of life is peaks and valleys. Don’t let the peaks get too high and the valleys too low.

John Wooden

 

Wooden was perhaps the greatest college basketball coach ever.  I think the fans at Duke, UNC and Kentucky may argue, but would still accept his legacy.

My mother told me something similar.  Life is about overcoming problems.  She said it is a series of hurdles that you have to overcome and there will always be another one.

One will always be on one of 3 sides of a situation.  You will be approaching it, enduring it or having just overcome it.  How you deal with it defines you.

With respect to Wooden, it does make life easier when you don’t go too overboard on any of the peaks and valleys.  They all pass and there will always be another one.