Category: self-help

Foreign Languages and Klingon’s, Why Posting Has Been Light

Being a person of a certain age, I need to exercise my brain, body and even spirit. You stay in balance that way.

I’ve been using Duolingo to learn Italian for a couple of years. I would have picked French but the wife speaks every language in Europe it seems except Italian. Those are the two best sounding languages so it’s been the one I chose first when exercising my mind.

See my travails below how I turned it into a competition to beat others and dominate.

Over the last couple of years, I’ve meandered my way from rookie to the Diamond league, where most people who stick with it will stay with it and work hard, just because of human desire I suppose. The reward for that is that everyone studies hard and you need to do more to stay in the league.

HOW IT WORKS

Of course you learn, but you can use it on your computer or mobile device. Each is different. On the phone, you have 5 hearts (tries) before you fail a lesson. On the computer you can keep going, but get a continuously lower score.

There is a 15 minute double points score available as a bonus for finishing each round of lessons. If you do a practice on a finished lesson you can get max points with no hearts loss. Sure, this is sounding like a video game but everything is a competition to me. I’m a man and it was born in me. I can’t help it and I don’t apologize. I accepted it and use it to fuel my desire to learn.

There is more, but that gives you an outline of how to game it, but this blog is about how I got wrapped up in something else instead of blogging. Oh, and how I slayed the competition.

THE PLAYERS

As I stated, by the time you get to the diamond league, you are pretty well committed. Some are learning because they are in a new country. Some took languages in school. Others are near borders and naturally speak the language. Most have a reason to be in that league.

I’d taken German in high school so I added that language a few months back. It is good to learn Spanish because of the makeup of the country so I then added that. Just because I couldn’t stand not being able to do it, I picked up French. I’d already started Danish because of some in-laws so add that to the mix.

There is a pay version of the app and you can get points a lot easier and never run out of hearts (like having unlimited outs in baseball). It’s an unfair advantage to the free players but they paid so good for them. They can get points at twice the rate of us plebs, but it’s where I am at now. It makes winning that much sweeter.

There is always some inspired player who wants to win the league for the week and to do so you have to commit to really working. Sometimes it is a horse race.

HOW MY WEEK DEVELOPED

I always like to start out the week with a big score by doing the 20 point doubles. You can cruise the rest of the week and score enough to not get bumped down to a lower league. I then watch who is going to go for it during the week. Sometimes it’s early and sometimes people wait and put on the full court press at the end.

I noticed a trend a while back (read about me, I see patterns and trends in everything) that even though someone might want to compete, you can suck the will to win out of most if you put it out of their reach. They’ll fight for first loser (2nd place).

I did my usual big total on Monday and was in the top 3, but that isn’t unusual as I turn it to cruise mode once someone takes off. By Tuesday, I noticed the makeup of the group were people who weren’t aggressive and just did the same number of points a day.

THE PERFECT STORM

Once I put it together, I knew this was my week to give it a shot. I threw up 1000 points on Tuesday to see who the real players were going to be. Nothing happened. I tried it again on Wednesday. There was no response. I knew right then that if I killed it a couple of more days, it would be over. I didn’t see anyone willing to make it a race so I made it a run away.

THE ATTACK OF THE KLINGON’S

Early in the week, one of my relatives told me that Klingon was a language. I’m a huge Trekkie/trekker so I said why not. Points are free and easy at the beginning of every language to keep you going because it is a beta language. That means no penalty for missing. It’s like you paid for the pro version of the game. Free points just lit up in my eyes, plus I can say stuff in Klingon, only not yet.

By now, I was committed. As they say in Klingon, today is a good day to die (I haven’t learned it in Klingon yet and won’t put it through a translator, but watch any Klingon episode of Star Trek). I went for it and quickly stayed the week at double the score.

WHAT HAPPENED ALONG THE WAY.

For one thing, I didn’t blog much. I did learn a lot of Spanish, German, Italian and especially French. I learned a little Danish and some Klingon. I understood a lot of what happens in grammar, sentence structure and everyday conversation. I can ask for the bathroom in some languages and order a complete meal or talk about the house in others.

It was a good week. I’ll win because I never play for second. I told myself along the way it was for learning, but when the stars lined up, my inner self took over and I went hard at it. I killed any desire for the rest of the group to compete and I won’t get an opportunity to win but a few times in life. There are too many good people. I struck early and often and learned a ton along the way.

One day I’ll be fluent or can survive, at least in Europe.

Here’s a shout out to my German teacher in High School, Jane Phillips. She taught me well and was pretty hot so I liked her class.

If you look in my quote blogs, there is a lot about winning. I have a hard time sticking with anything very long before I drop it or figure out a way to the top or my desired destination.

It’s weird sometimes when you expect to win and you do, just like it is supposed to happen

Qapla’.

Mauerbauertraurigheit – Pulling Away From Groups or Others; An Introvert Issue That Others Should Respect

Here’s the definition.

Mauerbauertraurigkeit (n.) – the inexplicable urge to push people away.


This doozy of a word may add an extra dimension to our socially exhausted state. Mauerbauertraurigkeit means:
“The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like — as if all your social taste buds suddenly went numb, leaving you unable to distinguish cheap politeness from the taste of genuine affection, unable to recognize its rich and ambiguous flavors, its long and delicate maturation, or the simple fact that each tasting is double-blind.”

I’m not sure if this is a true psychological condition that is being taught or is proven like the Theory of General Relativity, but I know it is true.

Recently, it happened to me and I pulled out of some things I was doing. Partly it was Covid and partly it was Mauerbauertraurigkeit. There were different reasons, but remember I’m a patterns in life guy. I notice when it happens.

It’s happened to me all my life. I can’t stay with a group for much more than a couple of years. It depends on how obsessed I am with what I’m doing as to how much I’ll put up with before I have to go. I get socially and emotionally exhausted and my will just forced me away. It was if I was watching what was happening and couldn’t (and didn’t want to) stop it.

As it turns out, all the groups I left were for a good reason and were the right decisions in aftermath, but at the time I was mentally overwhelmed. The realization that I was free from the social obligations that kill me inside was blissfully comforting.

Normally, Covid would have been a problem as I wouldn’t have to go to groups I didn’t want to. Unfortunately, they invented Zoom and those of us who actually need body language to read people can’t.

Fortunately, I live a whole different life in my head as do most Introverts so I go there many times during Zoom. If I’m on mute, I probably muted not thinking about what was on the call.

I will say this, most extroverts are not polite about this and want to include you on all of their tedious activities, and want to know why you don’t want to do everything with everybody. They literally force me away because they want to be all up into my stuff. I suffered at work from this until I found ways to get out of social activities.

The answer and I guess the moral is when I’ve had enough, either for the day or for life, I have to get away and I can’t help it. I leave and never come back usually.

I can’t be alone on this. A lot of people are overwhelmed socially, by extroverts.

I imagine some people think they were ghosted, when in fact the person couldn’t help themself from pulling away.

I’ve never felt better about myself than when I leave, any of them at any point of my life. I don’t think that I’m missed and don’t really care if they think I’m anti-social. As long as I’m not a part of them anymore is all that matters.

Proof That Nothing Is Possible, Also Where (not when) Nothing Is the Best Place for Guys

And Now for Guys, I present the Nothing Box. Girls, you should pay attention if you really want to understand men, even though you’ll never really get it.

Also Guys, understanding why women’s minds are so busy is also explained. It’s something we’ll never get.

What is so funny to me is that every time I try to explain it to a girl, she can’t understand it or wants to get into my nothing box. They never understand that if you got into my nothing box, it would be a different box (see at 8:15 where nothing is something). Watch and see:

Rules For How To Be Successful At What You Do

  1. Pursue what you love. Passion is an incredible motivator. It fuels focus, resilience, and perseverance.
  2. Do the hardest work first. We all move instinctively toward pleasure and away from pain. Most great performers, Ericsson and others have found, delay gratification and take on the difficult work of practice in the mornings, before they do anything else. That’s when most of us have the most energy and the fewest distractions.
  3. Practice intensely, without interruption for short periods of no longer than 90 minutes and then take a break. Ninety minutes appears to be the maximum amount of time that we can bring the highest level of focus to any given activity. The evidence is equally strong that great performers practice no more than 4 ½ hours a day.
  4. Seek expert feedback, in intermittent doses. The simpler and more precise the feedback, the more equipped you are to make adjustments. Too much feedback, too continuously can create cognitive overload, increase anxiety, and interfere with learning.
  5. Take regular renewal breaks. Relaxing after intense effort not only provides an opportunity to rejuvenate, but also to metabolize and embed learning. It’s also during rest that the right hemisphere becomes more dominant, which can lead to creative breakthroughs.
  6. Ritualize practice. Will and discipline are wildly overrated. As the researcher Roy Baumeister has found, none of us have very much of it. The best way to insure you’ll take on difficult tasks is to build rituals — specific, inviolable times at which you do them, so that over time you do them without having to squander energy thinking about them.

Introverted Social Media

It doesn’t take many posts for you to see that I think Fake book and Twatter are the cesspools of the Internet. More hate is spilled there than Iran towards Israel and the USA.

I happily quit both. My life is better and while I didn’t waste a lot of time on them, it still was mostly useless.

I always hated those friend recommendations because I’m sure they were on the other side also. My rule was if you aren’t my friend then you aren’t worth being my fake book friend either. I happily forgot most of the people I grew up with and didn’t want to find them again, let alone reconnect.

It’s as bad as a phone call for an introvert without first warning that you are about to intrude on my life. There was an introvert on the team that invented texting to avoid that phone call.

When I saw this one, I realized that it was time to dump fake book. I also can’t stand that they are the arbiters of free speech and who is allowed on, so I made the decision for them. I don’t want to be in a place of hate or that has special rules for people who they don’t agree with personally, and went to other platforms that don’t suggest people I’d rather not see or hear from again in life.

Being Offended On The Internet

Just go away if you are offended (not by me, but by anything and then I have to hear about it). Here’s a clue, don’t read what offends you. Here’s a 2nd clue, just move along if it does. No one cares whether you get offended or not anymore. Everyone is offended, so why should we? More time is wasted arguing on the internet or arguing about topics that are….well see above.

I read that it must be tough to grow up with such a thin skin that words can hurt you so badly.

Go away and leave me alone.

Why You Should Ask Older People For Advice

If you want to know the road ahead, ask someone who has been there.

Throughout my life, I’ve always asked people for what advice helped them the most, either good or bad. Sometimes, knowing what to avoid is just as, if not more helpful. I stumbled on this by accident when I realized that I didn’t know everything there was to know as an adolescent, even though I thought I did.

Not knowing the outcome is good if you don’t want to spoil a surprise. Knowing the right path in life to take is never a bad thing.

One thing I’ve learned is that most wise people have also learned that a lot of people don’t listen, so their knowledge remains with them because they are tired of offering to help, only to see it rebuffed or not taken. The same mistakes that experience already taught someone is then a lesson never learned or passed on.

It’s up to you. Ask what is the meaning of life, what helped the most, what is your biggest mistake, I have 2 paths in life to take but don’t know which to choose.

My View On What Social Media Has Become

Don’t get me wrong, there are some good things, but sooner or later it goes down the crapper when someone “offends” another. It is where you can find more bias and discrimination (against anyone and everyone) since segregation.

Twitter is probably the biggest cesspool. Since Facebook Fake Book started censoring, you can’t trust what is real or not. I also don’t care about my high school or college enough to see what they are doing. If either of us cared, we’d have stayed in contact.

The hate generated against the last President just told me the people in charge of these platforms are untrustworthy. They say one thing and do another.

Do what you want. Most are addicted to social media. The truly smart people don’t waste time trying to impress others as to how good their life is or worry about what others have.

My life is better without social media terrorists. I still get what I need to know without it being filtered by a loser in a cubicle with an axe to grind over who voted for whom. The elitist oligarch’s have told them what is allowed, then they prattle on condemning exactly what they are doing.

As usual, I’ll just do my own thing and let others suffer who wish to read that tripe.

Today’s Most Ironic Head Line Of The Day

From the WSJ:

China Is Now Sending Twitter Users to Prison for Posts Most Chinese Can’t See

Two of the most restrictive groups censorship wise are going at each other here to ban information that was made to be published, go figure. Note: It refers to the CCP government, not the Chinese people.

Both are paranoid and neither are really helping anyone get better. My advice, leave both.

On The Ignorance Of Youth

“Nothing can be so amusingly arrogant as a young person who has just discovered an old idea and thinks it is their own.” – Sidney J. Harris

I don’t mind them going through this as a right of passage because I know I knew everything at one point. The only thing that is tough to take is someone who can look something up on a phone and thinks they know everything. That is not learning.

Learning involves a lot of failing and mistakes to hone a craft. We all learn best by learning what not to do before mastering any skill.

I make them put their phones away to prove their point and it takes all the bullets out of their guns.

Milton Friedman On Freedom and Society

Milton Friedman quote: A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that...

I like people that are informed and right most of the time. Friedman was both. He was an economist. I take it for what it is. I suppose there are political overtones if you want to read into it, but I am trying to stay out of that pool so don’t.

There is a lot of things that can hold us hostage like addiction, debt, lying….you recognize them.

When Doing Your Very Best Isn’t Trying

Only the mediocre are always at their best. - Jean Giraudoux

See a couple of posts below on office speak. I heard one that said under promise and over deliver. That will make you look good once, but if you do the job right every time, you will be far more respected and trusted.

Einstein on Comprehending The World

“The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is at all comprehensible.” – Albert Einstein

Even I have a hard time comprehending everything that is going on. We haven’t been told the truth about everything that is going on (or the full truth) from the election, to the virus to the vaccine for the virus to what China knew…..and so forth.

I like to lean on those who are more learned than me or have more experience. They can usually provide guidance to figure out what is going on or at least how to survive.

But Wait, There’s More In Life Once You’ve Just Overcome Your Obstacle

Behind the mountains are more mountains – unknown, but supposedly an old Haitian saying

My mom told me you are either facing a problem/hurdle, in the middle of it or have just overcome it. If you overcame it, there is always another mountain.

She also told me that we were made to overcome obstacles. We get the most satisfaction from solving and defeating them.

Don’t shy away. From Thinkr:

Will-strengthening obstacles are often the most painful, but the lessons they teach also go the deepest if we allow them to instruct us. To strengthen the will, we must always expect more difficult times to lie ahead.

The Changing Times, Optimists/Pessimists/Realists

The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails. – William Arthur Ward

We are in a season of change, from health issues to government changes around the world to how and where to work. It is up to each of us to adjust accordingly.

Adjust doesn’t mean changing any core values or forgetting lessons from experiences, it is applying them to the situation.

Set your sails and forget 2020 other than the lessons learned. Apply them to your future and move along, life will anyway, either with you or without you.

The Two Types Of People In Your Life

OK, except in machine level coding, nothing is that binary. It does capture a good percentage of the people you encounter however.

People don’t change, they reveal themselves to you. I try to cull the temporary people as life has taught me that lesson.

Joe Rogan On Defining Yourself by Success or Failure

“We define ourselves far too often by our past failures. That’s not you. You are this person right now. You’re the person who has learned from those failures. Build confidence and momentum with each good decision you make from here on out and choose to be inspired.” – Joe Rogan

Sometimes failures are the steppingstone to success. Lessons have to be learned so that you know which path to take and why.

We have a choice. You can wallow in the past and something you didn’t succeed, or use the gift you have been given from your experiences to be the best you for today.

I post this to show that not all actors (he’s really a stand up comedian and podcaster) are not all celebtards.

Why/When to Never Miss An Opportunity To Shut Up – On What To Do During Small Talk

“The time to stop talking is when the other person nods his head affirmatively but says nothing.” – Henry S. Haskins

Actually, this is a daily double because Mark Twain quoted the title. I can’t count the times in my life that I wish I hadn’t said what came out.

This will serve you well in negotiations. At the time to close the sale, any sales person will tell you the first person to talk loses. The sale could be a business plan, a product or yourself to a company or a promotion.

This is the most obvious thing possible for introverts. As others drone on in mindless small talk, they have already begun a new adventure in their minds. Yes, they nod and perhaps might give a monosyllabic answer to the conversation but it is likely they left a while ago.

It is a matter of politeness, not what the other person is doing by talking too much and too long. Note: it is not being mean, it is how minds work. It happens unintentionally. It is why one should take this saying to heart. Read the last sentence.

Of course introverts will talk endlessly on a deep subject or something of importance, when we find someone who cares. The difference is that when others are nodding or giving one word answers, the conversation is over because we can read body language better than most.

The biggest benefit of not always talking is you never have to take back something you said.

Others won’t avoid you if you read their signals and stop talking. I’ve seen it too many times at work, at school and in social outings.

This eventually includes everyone, not just the introverts.

Michelangelo On Success and How Hard to Try

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.

I posted a similar saying by Dr. Ferdinand Porsche who summerized it in a different but succinct way.

The net of it is don’t be lazy, don’t underestimate your goals or ability and for Pete’s sake, try harder. You’d be amazed at what you can achieve.

I read from the Navy Seals that no matter how exhausted you are, you still have about 60% more to give.

I’m Shocked, Social Media Causes Depression

Social Media, the place where you can make yourself look better to feel good about yourself when someone likes the tripe you post. Aside from being little more than a digital high school, a cesspool of hate (Twitter) and one of the biggest time wasters invented, it appears to causes depression.

In recent years, a number of studies have linked heavy social media use to an increased risk of depression.

“But then you have to ask the chicken-and-egg question,” said study author Dr. Brian Primack, a professor of public health at the University of Arkansas, in Fayetteville.

On one hand, he said, excessive time on Twitter or Facebook might fuel depression symptoms. On the other, people with depression might withdraw from face-to-face interactions and spend more time online.

So Primack and his colleagues decided to see whether social media use made a difference in young adults’ risk of future depression.

It did, according to their report, which was published online Dec. 10 in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine.

The study included nearly 1,000 adults aged 18 to 30 who were depression-free at the outset, based on a standard questionnaire. All reported on their usual social media time and were assessed for depression again six months later.

By that time, nearly 10% fit the criteria for depression.

Overall, depression risk rose in tandem with time spent on social media.

Full report here

What and When Is Something Wrong?

“‘Wrong’ is one of those concepts that depends on witnesses.” – Scott Adams

It makes me wonder what is going on with the election. There clearly are witnesses, but there is enough uncertainty on both sides that it makes one question who did what and is it real?

Maybe the history books will one day discover what happened.

That having been said, it is a matter of moral importance as to what you do. It is said that how you act when no one is looking that defines who you really are.

Shakespeare on What Quality Is Important To Him In Women

Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks, shall win my love. - William Shakespeare

I agree that looks fade away. You have to peel back the layers and find the jewel inside.

There are many beautiful women who are kind and loving, but many also that just trade on their looks. Too many have paid price of the Siren’s Song.

Time is fair to everyone. Sooner or later we all get old and all that is left is what is inside.

Story Telling, Why The Marvel Movies Were So Successful

“It’s not enough to bash in heads. You’ve got to bash in minds.” Joss/Zack/Jed Whedon

There are really a lot of reasons it was successful, but being able to tell a story is what enthralls people. It doesn’t have to be Marvel really, it has to be a good story.

What they are referring to is anyone can make a fight scene, or imitate someone else in real life. This isn’t hard. Weaving the fight into the story arc is the art.

Not every story has a happy ending. Sometimes, a character has to die. In life, some sacrifices for the better good must be made. That could include you as the sacrifice.

It is also about hard choices that divide allegiances. It is a no win and usually a blurred line as to where the divide between right and wrong exists.

Telling the story that involves emotions is always better than just stating facts.

Kurt Vonnegut On How To See Undreamed of Things First

“Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can’t see from the center.  Big, undreamed-of things — the people on the edge see them first.”

I love being out on the edge. I love to think deeply and talk to deep thinkers. I’ve seen trends exactly by doing this. It can serve you well to take yourself out of the center of your life and watch what is going on from the bleachers. You can see the whole game that is called life a lot clearer.

Of course Introverts have an advantage here because of observation skills.

Leonardo di Vinci On Why Passion Is Important

“Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.”

Desire is a passion. I’ve noticed over time that to start and continue any task, vocation or avocation requires passion to do it. This is different from trying a fad.

Find someone who is competent and passionate about something and you’ll have loyalty and a better chance of success.

This One Is For Introverts

I know some introverts. They have a lot to say and are very deep people. The problem is that the others talk over them a lot of the time. I watch the introverts just shut down at that point and a great story or deep conversation stops.

If you know someone like this, give them a chance. You might be surprised to find a loyal and interesting friend.

Tuesday Saying – The Two Most Important Days Of Your Life

This is his, not mine. I have some other days that deal with eternity, but will be another day and another saying.

Enjoy what Twain says and I hope it helps you discover yourself. Hint: If you concentrate more on improving you instead of others, you’ll probably be ahead in life and others will be able to stand you easier.

Monday Saying – About Dreaming Or Living In Reality

Thinking clearly about the future lets you live wisely in the present. – Unknown.

Part of the discussion when I heard this was to not live in the past. Be guided by your past to avoid mistakes or achieve success, but that is different for everyone.

After Election Saying – How To Move On

The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next. – Mignon McLaughlin

People familiar with addiction will recognize this.  Sometimes you just have to make it to the next goal in front of you because the whole view of what is going on in life can be overwhelming at times.

You can make this little accomplishment and then the next.  You build on these small steps and you’ve made it through whatever you’re going through, even if it is the election

Monday Saying – When To Shut Up

I have noticed that nothing I never said ever did me any harm. – Calvin Coolidge

I heard another version that went never miss a good opportunity to shut up.

I liked how Coolidge spoke after he thought. That way, he didn’t have to say that much and got right to the point. Others knew he wasn’t going to waste their time with BS so when he talked, they listened.

Still, most of you, cut the crap and the small talk. It’s a waste of time and is annoying.

Friday Saying – How To Build Your Reputation

You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.” – Henry Ford

It’s true, you can really only promise to do something once and get fully believed, unless you do what you promised.

The bane of Introverts is small talk and inevitably, during small talk comes promises or boasting of things one will absolutely do. I’m more surprised when they actually do what is promised than by the cheap words now.

Yes, you are being judged by what you do, and probably fairly. Don’t make a promise you can’t keep. Better yet, keep your mouth shut unless you’ve already delivered on the promise.

Tuesday Saying – How To Appreciate Life

Maybe you have to know the darkness before you can appreciate the light.  – Madelline L’Engel

Some have to reach their rock bottom to recover from disease, broken heart, addiction or whatever the poison is.  Everyone has a story.

Going through it, recovering or learning how to live with the darkness is when you grow.  Admitting what is bothering you is a good first step, but we move on and deal with things our own way.

You sure appreciate how much you have when you think how little time you have to enjoy it.  Choose light and not darkness.

 

Monday Saying – Why Not To Trust Social Media

The only source of information for most people now is a machine that is designed to partially inform people, misinform people, spread conspiracy theories, and lies faster than facts.”- Tristan Harris
The alternate view by Mark Manson is this:

Social media algorithms do not manipulate and push users into believing awful things. People already believe the awful things and social media simply spreads them more easily. Critics like Harris imply that tech companies are sitting in Silicon Valley scheming for ways to extract more ad dollars from people’s anxiety and misinformation.

Either way, it points out that there isn’t that much good to it the way it exists. At best it is a time waster for most.  At worst it is the above.

I say think for yourself and stop believing the group think on Twitter, Fakebook, Instagram and the other time suck platforms.
They could be a a useful tool for sharing pertinent information, but it just isn’t that way.   There is so much out there that spending more than 5 minuted a day on this probably isn’t helping your life.

I’ll leave you with this thought.

Thursday Saying – Success By The Author of Fight Club

“In truth, the degree of anyone’s success depends on how often they can say the word yes and hear the word no.” – Chuck Palanuik

 

Some people stop at no.  Not me.  If you want to succeed, you have to just look at that as a stepping stone to overcome.  Life is about overcoming.  That gives us the greatest satisfaction.  It’s not likes on social media.  It’s when we dig deep, think clearly, seek help and pull ourselves up to victory from the jaws of defeat that gives us the greatest sense of accomplishment.

They’ll say yes sooner or later if you don’t take no for an answer.

Wednesday Saying – Mark Twain On What The World Owes You

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. – Mark Twain

 

I wasn’t sure if this should have been a sarcasm post instead of a saying.  Why?  Everyone, especially sports stars, rioters, news makers and celebrities seem to think that they are owed something.  They are like the rest of us, the world owes you nothing.

You are what you make of yourself and the sum of your choices that got you where you are.  That means the responsibility for life is yours to either buck up or suffer for not pulling your share.  The responsibility is yours and no one else’s.  Except for some circumstances that are random or uncommon, ou can take either the credit or blame for where you are in life.

My advice is to do good, stop blaming anyone else and make good choices.

Tuesday Saying – The Price You Pay For Your Profession

“The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.” – James Baldwin

 

Someone said find your passion and you’ll never work a day in your life.  This is not true.  Sooner or later we become victims of routine or more likely other people will make your job a pain.

This is the ugly side.  At some point even Michael Jordan had to retire, but he still can’t go to a restaurant without people bothering him.

Enjoy what you have and be glad you get to do it.

Friday Saying – Why Introspection Is So Important

“No man remains quite what he was when he recognizes himself.” – Thomas Mann

 

Once you take your guard down and truly admit who you are, you get to see the person that is you.  It’s doubtful that you’ll ever show this person to others except on a deathbed, but once you see yourself as you view and judge others.

We think we are invincible and nearly immortal when we are young, but the scars of life take it’s toll as do the decisions we make or avoid and we aren’t who we think we are.

As we age, inside we still see ourselves as the younger version until things start breaking down, but Zoom meetings will show you that age is taking it’s toll.  Maybe that is why some hide their looks with makeup.

Great Sayings – Why We Strive In Life, Not For Participation Trophies

“Don’t do what you want. Do what you don’t want. Do what you’re trained not to want. Do the things that scare you the most.” – Chuck Palahniuk, Author of “Fight Club”

 

The more difficult the struggle, the greater satisfaction from the accomplishment. That saying is from both my Mother and me.

No one gives a rats ass about a participation trophy.  We want to win.  To win you have to struggle, train, learn and fight for what you want.  Look at what athletes do to attain victory.  There is only one winner and second place is first loser.

There is only one CEO, but that person sacrificed along the way in time, travel and lack of attention to their family.

Dedication, training and commitment to any goal is necessary to achieve and succeed.

Overcoming what you are afraid of is and equal victory.  The sense of satisfaction we get from beating our demons is as great for some as is winning a competition or succeeding in life.  We were made to overcome obstacles in life and learn from that struggle.

Don’t give up or give in.  Relish the sweet sense of victory or vanquishing what held you back.

 

Friday Saying – A Different If A Tree Falls In The Forest Point Of View, Mensa Version

Even if one tree falls down it wouldn’t affect the entire forest. Chen Shui-bian

 

Yes, the one we know is “If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it does it make a sound?”, but in a way the above one is more correct.

Of course it makes a sound, but unless it is a forest of one, it doesn’t affect the forest.  The reason is that life goes on.  We are all trees in the forest of life, but we are born, live and then die.  Most are forgotten, but that is the way of life.  What is it’s meaning and what is your contribution to society, family or….?

Here’s a quick test to see what you’ve done.  Write your own obituary.  You’ll see what you’ve contributed and what you have done.

Which brings me to my favorite Mensa joke.  What is the meaning of life, give 3 examples.  Those who understand it will get it.

Things Not To Do – Arguing On The Internet

I already talked about this in the post “Stupid things that smart people do“.

I posted about how people have Internet road rage also as they are so brave hiding behind their screens doing things that would get their asses kicked in real life.

Arguing on the Internet is the biggest waste of time, other than social media.  Why do you ask (even if you don’t)?  Besides being a waste of time, you are looking at the best side of people and comparing it to the worst side of you (they take better vacations, their family is nicer, I’m not as pretty……).  It’s like a first date or job interview.  You are seeing the side they want to show you, not the real McCoy.

People think they are going to convince others that they are wrong or should switch to think like them because they are right.  Neither of these will happen.  You won’t convince anybody of anything and you just wasted more time in addition to Facebook, Twitter (the cesspool of the Internet) or any of the other time suck sites.

The other people that argue with you are the ones who do it to piss you off.  I know some of these people who do it for sport.  Hell, I get people in comments here who want to make their point because they believe they are right and I am wrong.  My answer is get your own blog.

Don’t be a time waster.  Don’t argue with people who ate paste.  Life is too short and someone out there really needs your help or time, not the kid from school.

 

 

Monday Saying – Why You Should Be Brave Enough To Say Yes or No (bonus for Introverts)

“In truth, the degree of anyone’s success depends on how often they can say the word yes and hear the word no.” – unknown.

 

Many are afraid of what others will think if they divert from their principles and don’t give the real answer.  It would save both parties a lot of time and angst if you would just be honest.

For Introverts, this is the best conversation.  It cuts through the BS small talk about why you can or can’t do something and gives the appropriate answer.  You’ll be respected for getting to the point quickly and will feel better about yourself for being honest.

Some, albeit a few might get their feelings hurt, but it will pass once they see you have done the right thing.  Many will appreciate that you gave them a straight answer, even if it isn’t dressed up and decorated with flowers and bows before you dance around your answer.

Say it, Yes or No.  Then move on to a deeper conversation.

Friday Saying – Einstein On Success and Perserverance

I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right.

 

Many have heard this as if at first you don’t succeed try, try again.  While this is true, it assumes that you can just force success.

As we know, Einstein could see things through his thinking that few could fathom.  This was finesse rather than force.  Nevertheless, this does show that he never gave up and continued despite setbacks.

That is the lesson, don’t give up just because you didn’t get it right the first time.  Will you come up with the Theory of Relativity?  It’s doubtful, but you just might find meaning in your life.

Thursday Quote – Nietzsche On Social Media and Peer Pressure

The surest way to corrupt a youth is to tell them to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently.

Nietzsche hated “the Herd”. He was often writing against the ideas and ways of the masses in favor of the free thinker who has risen above them. This statement is a clear example of this worldview.

Who are the herd?  They are social media telling you what to think, say, speak and what your values should be.  They are the MSM, celebtards and sports stars who want to force their values on you because of an outdated construct that equates fame with power.

Think for yourself and don’t be afraid to say it.  Don’t be a dumb ass though and say it when you are surrounded by Antifa or the rioters.  There is no reasoning with them right now and even agreeing with them can get you an ass whooping.

Don’t take your views from the media.  Almost no entity is more biased at this point.  Don’t succumb to pressure from social media.  That is just the new high school for the in crowd.  Be your own person instead and think for yourself.

Nietzsche is not wrong about the herd.  You’ll never respect yourself if you think like the herd just to be one of them. It isn’t worth it.

It is a smart person who avoids trouble, but chooses wisely when and where to take a stand for his values.

Wednesday Saying – Nietzsche on Suffering

What does not kill me, makes me stronger.

For Nietzsche, psychological growth is one of the most important things there is. Experiences do not have to be pleasurable to be good for us. Often it is suffering which gives meaning to our lives. By gaining experiences, good or bad, we grow as people, so long as we survive them, of course.

This quote is usually said as a quip, rather than to understand it’s true meaning.  Navy Seals fully understand this and what it takes to not give up even when you want to and it is the easy path to take.

File this under the school of hard knocks, of which I have a Ph.D.

Friday Saying – John Wooden On Life

All of life is peaks and valleys. Don’t let the peaks get too high and the valleys too low.

John Wooden

 

Wooden was perhaps the greatest college basketball coach ever.  I think the fans at Duke, UNC and Kentucky may argue, but would still accept his legacy.

My mother told me something similar.  Life is about overcoming problems.  She said it is a series of hurdles that you have to overcome and there will always be another one.

One will always be on one of 3 sides of a situation.  You will be approaching it, enduring it or having just overcome it.  How you deal with it defines you.

With respect to Wooden, it does make life easier when you don’t go too overboard on any of the peaks and valleys.  They all pass and there will always be another one.

Thursday Saying – How To Win

You will never win if you never begin.

Helen Rowland

 

Wayne Gretzky said you miss 100% of the shots you never take.

Sometimes things hold us back from trying.  It could be fear of failure, embarrassment, procrastination or just timidness.

Learn from the lessons in life.  It’s OK to try and fail, because that is the start to the road to success.

Start now and don’t regret never having done whatever it is.

Wednesday Saying – How You Act Make A Difference

Act as if what you do makes a difference, it does – William James

 

No matter what you do, someone is watching.  Your kids learn by imitating you. Your co-workers watch you to see if you carry your load.

The military in the trenches of warfare want someone next to them they can trust, with their lives.  It could come down to that in an instant.

Whether you are spiritual or secular is noticed also.  The way they treat you will be your judge of how they perceive your actions.

So, actions speak louder than words.  Others notice.  Some may not care, but with the internet, nothing you do is ever forgotten.  The politicians in this years election are going to have to deal with it.  Some have decades of experience, some have a few years.  They will all be judged by what they have done and who they have done it for.

Also, don’t be a dick on social media.  It will haunt you forever.

Act right, do the right thing because it makes a difference.

Tuesday Saying – Who Is Normal?

“The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.” – Joe Ancis

 

Some say there are skeleton’s in everyone’s closet.  The way I say it is that everyone has a story.

When you meet someone, it’s like a job interview. They put on the best version of themselves.  It’s kind of like a first date.  They show you the best version of themselves and how good they are.

Once you know them, the warts begin to show.   We let our guard down and you begin to see the real person.

Unless you go through this process and learn, you play a video in your head of who you think the other person is.  It’s rarely right because you don’t know them or what they’ve been through, or what they are capable of doing (to you).  That is why they seem normal.  My rule is that most are not.  Everyone has a story.

It’s why I usually don’t talk much about myself and just try to be the real me.  The sooner you show who you really are, the quicker you can weed out the fakes you run into.

Friday’s Saying – Henri Fredrick Amiel

“The man who insists on seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides.”

 

A more common version of this is he who hesitates, hesitates.

No one knows the outcome of any decision.  We only have a few scientific theorems that are somewhat certain, for now.  They could be proven incorrect (Einstein’s Theory of Relativity) if we use scientific methods.

The same can be said for our everyday lives.  We usually think we are right, but we don’t know how it will turn out.  Many times our decisions help or harm others in ways we never intended them to.

Nevertheless, most of the time, making a decision is better than not making one, or procrastinating.  I’m in favor of getting the best intel you can to make a good decision, but in the heat of the battle you have to make one.

This is why some are better leaders than others.  They have the right instincts or have been through enough to have history and experience on their side to make a better decision.

There have been good young leaders, it’s just that most don’t have the wisdom of a life lived to not know when to shut up.

We’ll never have perfect clearness because we can’t see the future.  If we did, life wouldn’t be worth living.

Great Sayings – On Why To Be Positive by Wilson Mizner

If you count all your assets you always show a profit.

Wilson Mizner

 

Some people use the version of this that the glass is half full.  Some are optimists, some are pessimists.

How you look at life (and your life) can certainly change your perspective and your attitude.

It’s your choice to be happy or miserable.  Some are happiest when miserable, but I can’t change that.

When you are happy and count your blessings, others will feed off of that and you could change a life.  Just remember who gave you your blessings.

Great Sayings – Marcus Aurelius on Celebtards, Sports Stars and Politicians Today

“The opinion of 10,000 men is of no value if none of them know anything about the subject.”

Marcus Aurelius

 

Celebrities pretend to be someone else.  They are trained liars.  Sports stars are the best of the best at playing kids games.  Politicians for the most part live to be re-elected and like celebtards, are trained liars (many are lawyers who are masters at not telling the truth).  The MSM are the worst.  They are news readers that have a bias one way or the other.  None of them really know about what they are telling us to do.  It is almost always do as I say, not as I do.

Why the hell would we listen to these people’s opinions?  For the idiots who trust social media, it’s because they live a false life on social media.  Kids (I include millennial’s to teenagers here) haven’t had enough hard knocks in life.  Sometimes it is the parents fault for trying to not have them go through what made them learn about life.  That’s why everyone got participation trophies and time out.

Older people who buy into what others are saying instead of finding out and deciding for themselves have no excuse.  Life causes us to learn whether we want to or not.  It’s called making mistakes and learning from it.  They just didn’t learn from it.

The net is don’t change your values because you went with the crowd.  That didn’t work in high school and it won’t work now.  Learn to think for yourself and do what you know is the right thing to do.

Seek out those who know what they are talking about, not those described in paragraph one above

Great Sayings – William Penn on Right vs. Wrong

“Right is right, even if everyone is against it, and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it.”

William Penn

 

The peer pressure (or social media pressure) to go with the crowd is burdensome at best, overwhelming at worst.  Standing out from the popular opinion and risk being ostracized for doing what is right is too much for some.

This seems tougher for the youth who are trying to fit in, or those who are not self-assure in who they are.

Stop seeking adoration if it causes you to drift from your moral compass.  You may drop from the popular crowd, but why would you want to be a part of a group that seeks to do wrong?

If today’s youth (and a good percentage of adults) would think about this, we might not have riots in big cities, we might get along better, we might give each other more space instead of condemning them or cutting them off in traffic.

In your heart, you know right from wrong.  Try doing it for a change.

 

No going back, how Covid has changed us

Covid has changed our lives for good, and possibly/probably not for the better. Let’s take it by activity.

Travel

Here is some history. Flying used to be fun, economical and had good service. We used to like going on an airplane until some jag-off decided to try and light his shoe bomb on a plane.  Then another tried to blow up his underwear. We now have to queue in a long line  and I’m not all that sure that it’s stopped anyone other than the average Joe traveler. It hasn’t stopped the TSA from copping a feel on strangers.  The food sucks now and isn’t free anymore. Flying is more like the line for enlistment (including your prostate exam by the TSA) than to get on a plane.

With Covid, we can now add a temperature check, face masks and the the fear of catching anything from being in a tube for hours with little to no service.  The airports are petri dishes for bacteria.

Given the losses on travel companies and equipment manufacturers, it doesn’t bode well for the travel industry or the travelers.

Going to the office to work.

The requirement to be in person at work not as necessary as thought.

Before remote working, we had to be in the office or no one could be fully sure that you were earning your pay. Travel and working remotely eased that but there still are some bosses who didn’t trust their employees.   I had one piss-ant manager named R. Gorman when I worked at Thinkpad who didn’t trust anyone. He  sent a memo called rules of the road where you had to be in the office. All that got him was no trust or loyalty from the team. We were technologically equipped to work from anywhere and always did on business travel, but there still was some requirement to be in the office otherwise.

Employees want to be empowered to succeed. When that happens, they find ways to be creative and accomplish their goals. Conversely, when you treat them like school children, many will act that way. Just like with Ray, our productivity went down and the Ray jokes went up.

Now, no one can go in to work while we are socially distancing, and most jobs (non-manufacturing) are still getting done. It’s easy to reach anyone at anytime (too easy and too intrusive) but the oversight of said taskmasters is not needed. In a way, the people are now empowered and they still get the work done.  This one could be a benefit of Covid.

The downside is that a lot of empty buildings will lose their real estate value as there is no need to be in the office with the exception of essential workers.

How it affects the home

For us introverts, I thought it would be a time that we could cancel and/or avoid engagements until Zoom invaded our lives. Now even virtual happy hours are like a meeting. I’ve noticed that it’s hard to get privacy when kids and dogs are in the room or yelling in the background. Spouses or parents have been caught parading nude in front of the camera by accident.

When you meet in person, it’s easier to read body language and have someones attention. I tend to drift during Zoom meetings and have multiple devices that I often look at. I’ve noticed that I’m not alone.

Trouble for Introverts

Normally, we would be in pig heaven not to have to go to the office. In addition to the invasiveness of Zoom/Skype, we are stuck in the house with extroverts who won’t leave us alone. It’s like being trapped in hell. You want the quiet and the peace you got when the extrovert was in the office, instead your personal space is invaded and you can’t escape the dreaded small talk.  The place that used to be your refuge has been invaded and there is no escape.  It’s a fucking nightmare.  It’s the people in your house that you can’t get away from.

How are you supposed to recharge your social battery when an extrovert is constantly draining it all day?  Please, leave me alone and talk to your girlfriends.

Schools

The school model is now exposed, especially at college level. No more extortion for dorms when you can do 90% online. College professors are no longer as essential. Recorded classes, especially at the 100 and 200 level are adequate. Online testing and submitting required homework is routinely done online even well before this virus.

It turns out that colleges are a Breathtakingly overpriced product.

https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2020/05/breathtakingly-overpriced-product-mike-rowe-says-covid-19-revealed-college-really/

According to Mike Rowe: “They’re gonna’ find big thinkers with easily accessible ideas who are exponentially more interesting than professors, and soon, I hope, our obscene love affair with credentialing is going to stop, and we’re going to pause in every imaginable way, and look at what is essential – not just in workers or in work, but in education, in food, in fun. Everything is going to be forced through a different filter,” he said.

Colleges will also be exposed on their sports programs. Sports are a bank fund that pays for a lot of other school expenses and is a recruiting tool for enrollment. The schools will now have to rely on actual academics as a draw for students instead of March Madness or Bowl season. Maybe the students will now get an education instead of an indoctrination to Marxism.

Conversely, this is a big positive as the cost of education has the opportunity to go down (but so far the colleges are still extorting the same ransom from parents). Room and board are a large part of the cost of an education. Combine that with the lack of a requirement for many classrooms and there is the road to cutting costs.

It is not in the best interest of the Major institutions to charge less, but the cat is out of the bag that you can get almost as much done online. I hope that the masses will overcome and help this opportunity for cost cutting.

For elementary, middle and high school, I think it will hurt our youth.  There is a need for hands on in basic learning and kids have the attention span of gnats.  Sometimes you need to snatch their asses back to attention when it’s learning time.

New paradigm for getting essential needs like groceries.

Essential services like cancer, emergency rooms are same, but will change. Non-essential Dr. visits are now handled over the phone or via video. Dr.’s can now dedicate more of their time to real emergencies or necessary in-person visits. A person using the Emergency Room for healthcare because they don’t have insurance is going to go way down.

There is no downtime for paperwork and other overhead that comes with any job, but that got handled off-line mostly anyway.

Rely on technology more, but the risk is that you can take down a society like the virus did. Beware of hackers though, where there is opportunity, there will be bad guys looking to make your day worse.

Shopping

Groceries have taken a turn for the better/worse/something different. Now that we went through the great toilet paper shortage and people have enough to wipe their asses for the next 5 years.   They can realize that a little planning can condense 5 shopping trips into one, or one delivery or pickup.

A lot converts have been made for grocery delivery. There are a few kinks that need to be worked out though. I’ve gotten stuff I didn’t order, but mostly I rarely get everything I wanted, even if I put in what the substitute would be product. There is no shopping for the store brand that is a whole lot cheaper.

We have gotten used to queuing a lot more now. It used to be the end of the world for some people who had to wait for more than one person to checkout. Now, we’re standing on X’s taped to the floor like kindergartners waiting to go potty.

As is the trend, online shopping has picked up and the downside is retail stores are less needed.  Again, this is a loss in real estate value and will leave a lot of square footage available.

So all in all, some of this is good, but a lot of it was unnecessary. If it wasn’t an election year or if there were different political leaders, a whole lot of people wouldn’t be losing there freaking minds over every little thing that they look for to be offended by.  HCQ would be over the counter like it is in a lot of countries and we wouldn’t be held hostage for masks as no one really seems to know whether it truly helps or hurts us yet.

I’ll remain optimistic that society will adapt.  I’m pessimistic that this is a political power opportunity to control the masses and we should beware.

Great Sayings – Ralph Waldo Emerson on Living For the Moment

With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.

 

Yes, I know you have to plan for the future, but you don’t know what path it will take. Plan for multiple scenarios if you want.

I heard this saying in different words: Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, I live for today (Kimi Raikonnen).

Life goes by fast.  Stop suffering for things you did in the past.  There is nothing you can do to change what happened.

Stop worrying yourself about what might or might not happen tomorrow.  Tomorrow will take care of itself.  You have the past as a guide to know how to deal with it.

Great Sayings – Why Meetings Suck

“Meetings are indispensable when you don’t want to do anything.”

– John Kenneth Galbraith

We’ve now found out during Covid that in person meetings are not necessary.  Actually, most of us knew that from sitting in them and wishing we were dead or anything to not be there.

I do know a few people that love meetings and live for them.  I think they don’t want to work, or it’s the place they think they can actually wield power.  I avoid those people so I don’t have to go to their meetings.

I’ve written before why Meetings are a waste of time, and how to avoid them.

As an introvert, I loathe meetings.  My rule was that if there were anymore than 5 people nothing was going to get done.

Avoid them at all cost.  They are a time suck and we’ve now proven that you can get work done without them

 

Great Sayings – Why We Love Someone

Nobody loves a woman because she is handsome or ugly, stupid or intelligent. We love because we love.

-Honore de Balzac

 

There is someone for everyone.  I once read (so it might be somewhat true) that there are 15,000 Mr. or Mrs. Right’s for each person.  The problem is that they are spread around the world so they might not be next door.

The other saying is that goes with this is that Love is blind.  You love because we were created to love and to be together.

With all the nonsense going on in the world right now, it would be a whole lot better if we concentrated on loving someone instead of causing mayhem because they think they hate someone.

Love is a decision.  The romance usually wears off in 12-18 months.  After that, it is a cause, not an emotion.  Looks wear off with age.  The real beauty is inside a person.

Let that sink in.

Great Sayings – D.L. Moody On Dealing With The Problem That Is Ourselves

I have had more trouble with myself than with any other man. – D.L. Moody

 

Yes, we are many times our biggest problem.  The constant decisions of right vs. wrong and living with the consequences.

We all have a moral compass, it’s just that some choose to ignore it.  Unfortunately, the more you do something, the more you become numb to it.  There are few regrets for doing the right thing.  There are always regrets for doing wrong, either now or down the road.

Even if you escape it in the temporal world (while you are living), there are consequences in the Eternal world (your soul).

Moody was a biblical scholar and he refers to all of the above.  He is worth reading up on as he was a wise person, but still fought with himself and his struggle on Earth.

Great Sayings – Understanding Life As You Grow Old, Confucius and Jean Paul

Real knowledge is to know the extent on one’s ignorance. – Confucius

The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it. – Jean Paul

 

How many have said I wish I knew then what I know now?  Well, you would have lived life differently and not have learned what you know now.

The known unknowns and the unknown unknowns are the mysteries of life to learn.  Don’t be blinded by arrogance to think that you know everything.   Always try to learn something, anything no matter how little and you will never be disappointed.

Also, appreciate what you have for today.  You don’t know what tomorrow brings, or how many tomorrow’s you have.  It’s easy to be dissatisfied when you are selfish or self-centered.  Try looking at things from anothers point of view, especially their view of you and see if your thinking is clear.

 

Great Sayings On Genius, Suckers and Stupidity, How Much and How Often They Pass By Our Life

“Everyone is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes.” – Edgard Varese

A sucker is born every minute – P.T. Barnum

“Barnum was wrong – it’s more like every 30 seconds.” – unknown

“Human genius has its limits, but stupidity does not.” – Alexandre Dumas

We live in trying times.  It is tough to know what is really true, especially if you listen to the MSM, celebrities, sports stars or trust social media.  This means more as we are in an election cycle.

Inside, we all have a moral compass, it’s just that many refuse to look at it, study the facts and make the right decision.  Most see the world through the view of someone else’s beliefs.

Be smart and don’t be afraid to go against what is popular while sacrificing what is true and the right thing to do.  Sure, you may lose a few people in your life, but in the end you’ll be a heckuva lot better off not swimming against the current into the jaws of those who feast on the idiots.

Great Sayings – Who Is Rich? – Benjamin Franklin, But I Say Different

“Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody.” – Franklin

I think this was referring to materialism  People always want more, even when they get what they want.

King Midas wanted everything he touched to be gold, but he couldn’t eat and lost his child who was turned to gold.

I read that 4 out of 5 NFL players go bankrupt after being multimillionaires.  Most lottery winners declare bankruptcy.  Steve Jobs, Rockefeller’s, the Rothschild’s, Henry Ford, Howard Hughes and all of the most wealthy died stinking rich but wanting more.

You can’t serve 2 masters.  It’s a quote in the Bible.  You will serve one or the other, God or money.  It also says that where your treasure is, so shall your heart be.

For some, it is not wealth, rather they seek fame or some hobby or a person.  None of that will make you rich.

I’ve already said above where to look for answers that will give you your only source of happiness.  It isn’t in material things, rather spiritual.   There is nothing wrong with having material wealth, just don’t worship it.

Good luck

Great Sayings – Words Married Couples Should Never Use

“Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.”

Wendell Johnson

 

When I went to a group for married couples early in my marriage, this was one of the significant topics.

Sure, it’s written in humor in the quote above, but it is very true.  Nothing is always or never like you never put the toilet seat down or you always leave the lights on.  It’s just not true and both parties know it.

The reason I say married couples is that people dating or living together can just leave with little damage other than feelings.  While it’s not believed by a lot of people, the concept of marriage is until death do us part.  Some still pull that off.

So never say always and always say never.

Great Sayings – The Count of Monte Cristo

“Life is a storm, my young friend. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes. You must look into that storm and shout as you did in Rome. Do your worst, for I will do mine!” —  The Count of Monte Cristo

This is one of my favorite books. I’ll be honest that I don’t remember this line, but when I came across it I found it to be the story of everyone’s life.

How you face adversity should be with the same intensity that you face success.  The emotion will be different, but the effort should be equal.

Your hopes will be dashed on the rocks more than once.  Learning how to handle that without being destroyed gets you through the next dashing.

Conversely, when you succeed, how you handle it should be as if you have done it before.  There should be internal satisfaction with no need to put down the opponent, other than the hurdle you overcame.

Great Sayings – Judging a Person By Who They Are, Henry Ward Beecher

“A man’s ledger does not tell what he is, or what he is worth. Count what is in man, not what is on him, if you would know what he is worth — whether rich or poor.” –Henry Ward Beecher

Steve Jobs died with 9 billion dollars. It does him no good now.  He built a dynamic company that employees thousands and touches millions.  He also refused to acknowledge his daughter when she was growing up.  Which is more important?

Many of us want to show off what we have or what we look like on the outside.  Look no further than the cesspools that are Facebook and Instagram.  No matter how good the lives look there, what do they look like on the inside?  Actually, most people reveal how terrible they really are on Twitter, but that is not a dress up platform like the others.

What is in you?

Great Sayings – The Bias That People Have

People only see what they are prepared to see.  – Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

I’m not going to get political here because I think people should make up their own minds.  Most already have.  The problem with the MSM and Social Media is that you can confirm you bias, no matter what it is by going to what sources you feel comfortable to read.  That is your filter.

What I do think is that the actual smart people will have an open mind to both sides of any situation and look at the facts and ask questions.  We should challenge what is out there every time there is a “major issue” to see what the real answers are.

It takes time and you will have to have an open mind, but coming to the right conclusion instead of viewing a situation through the filter of what someone else says is the way to truth.

This is not easy.  What is easy is to fall back to your usual sources and just believe and regurgitate what is being said.

Take off the filter and evaluate like a detective.  Come to the right conclusion based on facts, not feelings or especially on what someone else said.

Great Sayings – How To Deal With Change (Covid 19 edition)

For the timid, change is frightening; for the comfortable, change is threatening; but for the confident, change is opportunity. –

Nido Qubein

What goes with this saying is that change is the only thing that stays the same.  It’s going to happen so how you deal with it is how it’s going to affect you.

Being frightened isn’t bad.  It heightens your awareness (fight or flight) to notice it’s happening and allows you to deal with it.  Those who embrace it and see the upside will be better off.  Running away from it isn’t going to stop it.  Life goes on and so must you.

As we get older, we get more used to it or get more used to running from it.  It’s your choice.

Look around you right now.  It’s happening with Covid 19, the riots and political back biting.  Stay above it and don’t believe what is being written (actually don’t read the news or social media, neither of which are likely to tell the truth).  Decide for yourself.

Great Sayings On Moving Forward In Life, Despite Your Circumstances

Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start. – Nido Quebein

 

You can’t change the past, regardless of how it treated you.  You have to learn from it and move on.  You also have to realize that it happened to make you the person you are.  You will never be someone else so stop trying to be like them.  Being yourself and accepting who you are is a gift.  Many refuse that gift.

Social media is who people want you to think they are and want you to be.  It’s becoming mind poisoning for many.  Enjoy and be happy for others, but don’t let it define you.

This comes to today’s saying.  Whatever happened happened.  It’s time to take what you’ve learned and make the most of what’s ahead of you.  You don’t know how long you may have to get done what you need to get done.  Try to enjoy it along the way.  You never know what lesson today brings to help you the rest of your life.

This is the only description I know of the amount of life you have ahead of you, but it is not for us to know.  If we knew the ending, we might not live our life the way it should be lived.

Great Sayings – Einstein On Being A Genius

Don’t let others get you down.  Don’t live your life by others version of what you should be.  It’s hard to buck social peer pressure and be yourself, but that’s what it can take sometimes to find the real you.

Stop wasting your life on social media to define yourself by others.  In fact it looks like staying off of social media except for family and a few actual friends looks like it makes your life better anyway.

It’s hard to seek your dreams.  You have to pay the bills and raise the kids, so sometimes your dreams or reaching your capabilities doesn’t come in your 20’s like it did for Albert.

That doesn’t give anyone a free pass for not trying their hardest to do their best.

Great Sayings – Muhammad Ali On How To Train

I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.
Most of winning is done before the event.  Sure, some people occasionally bring a surprise to the fight but almost always the winner also won in training.
I strive to win everything.  I win practice before training.  I try to win training.  I then try to win the event.  It showed me that tenacity over talent can accomplish a lot.
When you feel like giving up, don’t. You won’t know what you can achieve until you push your limits.  This counts at work, in life, sports and almost anything.

Great Sayings – Shakespeare

We know what we are, but know not what we may be. – Shakespeare

 

Another version of this goes – You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.  That was either Gretzky or Jordan.

Some don’t try for fear of failure, some don’t try because they lack courage.  Both lose because there is a reward for winning and a reward for learning if you fail.  I heard Michael Jordan say that he took over 30 shots to win games and missed, but it didn’t stop him the next time.  He said when asked if he was worried he might miss and he answered that why would worry about something that hasn’t happened yet?

Don’t let your inhibitions keep you from excelling.  You never know what is inside you until you try.  Many times I haven’t felt well for an activity that I needed to be well conditioned for, yet wound up killing it because all I needed was a warmup.

Go after it today, then go after it tomorrow.  Keep going after it until you can go.  The reward is not a trophy, it is the sense of accomplishment that will help you try again the next time.

Finally, let it be the judge of who you are, not social media.  That is turning into a cesspool of being a time suck and dragging you down because you think something is different than it is.  Don’t be a sheeple.

Great Sayings – JFK on Lying

“For the great enemy of truth is very often not the lie–deliberate, contrived and dishonest–but the myth–persistent, persuasive, and unrealistic. Too often we hold fast to the cliches of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.”

President John F. Kennedy, Yale University Commencement, June 11, 1962

It’s hard to know what to believe these days.  The media (MSM) lies to us every time they communicate, politicians say what they think others want to hear (there are a rare few that don’t) and Social Media is just a group lynching now for whatever you say that more than 1 other person disagrees.  Worst of all are the celebtards who think they have a clue to what life is really about and get together to preach to the masses because they have a million Instagram followers.

The bottom line is if you don’t believe in something, you will fall for anything.  For me it is faith, but everyone has to find their own way and their own rock to anchor to.  Good luck.

If everyone starts repeating the same thing, use your critical thinking to decide whether it is worth going along with or if it is even true.  I question just about everything until I know the motive.  Also, I quit Twitter, Quora and only look at FAKEbook for group events that I’m supposed to show up at.

Great Sayings – How To Succeed and Not Just Sit On Your Ass

It’s not just knowledge, succeeding is knowledge put into action.

 

There are a lot of smart people.  There are a lot of successful people that have lower IQ’s, but are smarter in life.  The difference is what they do with what they know.

The difference is putting yourself into action.  It’s also known as common sense.

I’ve worked with a lot of people who bitched that they never get ahead or that they are better/smarter/have been there longer/deserved it more than the person that got the promotion or the new position.  Almost always the person that got the prize was the one who took the chance and did the work.

Don’t sit on your ass.  Get out there and do something, then do more.  Rinse and repeat then watch the results.

There is too much history behind this to show that it works.  You don’t win every time, but that is why they play the game.  This one is called life.

Great Sayings – Life is Tough Buttercup

When you do things because they are easy or the easy way, life will be hard in the future. When you do things that are hard, life will become easy.

I remember in my early working days when I was busting ass on a Saturday.  A friend of mine was giving me a hard time about working while he was on his way to Hawaii because he only worked 2 weeks a month (he was a stewardess – his words).  He was flying there for free because he worked for the airlines.

I knew that I was making a short term sacrifice for a long term gain.  I couldn’t afford the trip both in terms of money or time off.

A few years later, he decided not to serve cokes in the air for a living, but had wasted 15 years of working experience.  I had committed to getting ahead early in my career to enjoy my time later in life.  That required me to work hard when I was younger and sacrifice some things.

Now, I go where I want, when I want.  I’ve long since retired and my friend is still catching up and will be working for a long time.  I can afford a ticket to wherever, usually on frequent flyer points.  Life is a full circle.

I’m not a fortune teller, but life is short and there is a time for work and a time to reap the rewards of that work.  I knew that early and instead of living for the moment I had to work hard and sacrifice to enjoy the fruits of that labor.

We all learn lessons in life, but the are eerily similar.  Few are sports stars, win the lottery or inherit their wealth.  You need to work tenaciously, suffer from some hard knocks and learn from your experiences.  I knew way back then that goofing off early in life when you should be building the foundation for your life was the right decision.

I decided not to rub it in with my friend now that we are on the other side of the equation.  He is suffering enough and it’s just not worth it to me.  The results speak for themselves.

Great Sayings on Discernment – Spurgeon

Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong, it is the difference between right and almost right.

Times are weird right now.  What once was considered wrong is now right, just because.  The reverse is also true.

Don’t let what is going on tear you from your principles or the ability to know what is right.  It is difficult and it is also hard to know if you are correct in your discernment.

History is a good teacher.  It is important to have principles and stick to them.  It’s just hard to do when the world is upside down.

 

Things You Realize When You Get Older

I found this and agree with most of it.  It was written by an introvert if you couldn’t tell by the first bullet.

I used the last bullet when raising kids.  It kept them (mostly) out of trouble that a lot of my friends had to go through.

A lot of it really refers to personal responsibility for your actions and outcomes.  I wish more people were doing that right now instead of blaming others for their problems or as an excuse to act improperly

  • Books are your best friends.
  • Looks do not reflect character.
  • It is not necessary to impress people.
  • It is OK to be single.
  • Nothing happens by chance, everything happens by choice.
  • Crying does not mean you are weak.
  • Apologies can be accepted, but after that trust is usually denied.
  • People treat you according to their need.
  • You usually treat people like they treat you.
  • If we believe life is a blessing, it becomes one.
  • You are responsible for your own happiness.
  • Being reason behind someone’s smile is utter bliss.
  • Taking responsibility of your own life is the only way to create the life you desire.
  • There is no excuse for binge drinking. The consequences may be serious.

Great Sayings – Alexander Graham Bell

People breakup in relationships.  They get laid off from work.  Those close to us die.  It happens to everyone sooner or later.

You will always keep that memory whether or not you want to, but moving on is part of life.  Yes, it takes time, more for some than others.  Some never move on as a loss is hurtful.

The best thing I can offer is that every experience can help you grow.  Try to look for the positives.  Try to remember those things or people that you lost for their positive influence on you.  Sometimes if you can’t move on, at least move along until the pain is less.

The other situation I often see is that you don’t get the dream job you thought would change your life.  There is always a next job if you keep seeking and no one thing is the panacea of life that will cause it to stop if it doesn’t go your way.

Great Sayings – What Your Enemy Fears

“You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.”

Eric Hoffer

Sun Zhu said something similar about noticing your opponents weakness and you will win the fight because they can no longer hurt you.Much of the strife we go through is fear based recently.  It caused us to leave life and self-quarantine, until it was ok to go out and riot.  It’s been going on for a week now an there will be plenty of data shortly as to whether we really need to social distance anymore, because they sure aren’t doing it in the riot cities.

Remember Greta Thunberg?  She’s not even a blip on the map, nor is global warming.  The scare mongers have moved on to the next issue. I haven’t been afraid of these things because the truth is that we live in the greatest times of mankind ever.  Yes we have problems, but that is life.

There is no need to be afraid and have unnecessary fears.  The glass is really half full.  These can be the greatest years of our lives if we stop buying into the crap that the media and social media tries to feed us.

If you put your faith in something that is a rock and then you won’t be afraid.  Think for yourself and look at the facts to decide if what is going on is real or someone’s agenda.I think we are going to become more numb to these repetitive scare tactics being thrown at us and we will stand up to scare tactics by those who are trying it.

Great Sayings – Aristotle on Anger

“Anybody can become angry — that is easy, but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way — that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.” — Aristotle

 

It’s hard to figure out who is angry and who is an opportunist with what is going on right now.

Some people can go from zero to life in prison in 2 seconds.  Others seem to be able to take more than most.  As I grow older and with more wisdom, I realize that a lot of things really aren’t worth getting upset over.  I realized this when I was younger, but usually after I got angry and did something I regretted.

Oh, this works for other situations also, like relationships and work situations also.

Great Sayings – For High IQ People, or Anybody In a Group

If you are the smartest person in your group, you need a new group.

 

You are not going to grow if you don’t stretch yourself.  There is no standing still.  You either are advancing or falling behind.

Don’t fall behind.

Great Sayings – Jimmy Buffet on Past Relationships and Introverts

If the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me.

 

Good songwriters are clever with words.  This song is really about how you can’t re-live the past, but it’s also about introverts.

First, if the past was so good, why did you break up?  You can never go back because it won’t be the same.  Just try to remember the good times.  You’ll have others in the future, just different.

Next, there are many times I don’t call, text or start a conversation.  It’s not because I don’t want to or don’t have something to say, I just don’t want to get stuck in a small talk situation that is meaningless.  It doesn’t devalue my feelings on our relationship/friendship/acquaintanceship that we have, I just would rather talk if we really have something to say.  It is the life of introverts.

People don’t realize it, but introverts tell better stories.  There is way less going off the path and including unnecessary details and the timing of the punch line or the moral of the story is far more effective.

I doubt anyone thinks about me or other introverts not calling, but if the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me.

I always changed the saying at the bottom of my work email.  Some of them are ones that I have posted recently.  This was the last one I had when I retired from IBM.

 

 

Great Sayings – How To Handle Failure

Failure is but a paragraph in the book of each human life. It is the pages that follow that ultimately define us.

 

I don’t know who said this, but will give attribution if someone knows.

Some give up, some use it as motivation to try harder and some invent failure for extra motivation (Michael Jordan on rivals).

We are all going to go through it.  When you do, you should already be thinking about how you are going to deal with the aftermath.