Number sequences: Finding patterns and completing number sequences.
Word problems: Solving logical or mathematical word problems.
Logical reasoning: Questions that test your ability to draw logical conclusions.
Pattern recognition: Identifying visual or numerical patterns.
Spatial awareness: Questions involving shapes, rotations, or spatial relationships.
Verbal comprehension: Understanding and analyzing language-based questions.
Family relationships: Determining familial connections based on given information.
Word associations: Finding words that are least like others in a group.
Mathematical calculations: Solving math problems, often presented in word problem format.
Visual puzzles: Analyzing and completing visual patterns or sequences.
Time management: The tests often have time constraints, requiring efficient problem-solving.
Progressive difficulty: Questions typically increase in difficulty as the test progresses.
Multiple-choice format: Many Mensa test questions are presented in a multiple-choice format.
Diverse subject matter: Questions can cover a wide range of topics to test general intelligence rather than specific knowledge.
I’m well acquainted with the Mensa community. Like all people, they come in many flavors. Just because you are in the top 2% of the population in terms of IQ doesn’t make you any better or worse than others. Some of those people are truly amazing people. A couple were royal fuck ups in life.
This is the first update in a while, but it was well worth it. If I missed one, please comment and I’ll include it.
If one of these offends you, take the complaints elsewhere, I’m the one that got dissed here.
A beer short of a six pack A brick short of a load A couple of eggs shy of a dozen A couple of gallons short of a full tank A few ants short of a picnic A few beers short of a six-pack A few bricks short of a pile A few bricks short of a wall A few cards short of a deck A few clowns short of a circus. A few feathers short of a whole duck A few fries short of a Happy Meal A few peas short of a casserole A few tomatoes short of a good thick sauce
A few soldier short of a squad A few trucks short of a convoy A fortune cookie short of a Chinese dinner A pepperoni short of a pizza A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on A sandwich short of a picnic A train short of a full service? About as bright as a burnt out 20 watt light bulb. About as useful as a chocolate fireguard Ah say, that boy reminds me of Paul Revere’s ride; a little light in the belfry An experiment in Artificial Stupidity An intellect rivalled only by garden tools As much use as a hedgehog in a condom factory As much use as an ashtray on a motorcycle As quick as a tortoise on Prozac As smart as bait
As smart as Joe Biden As useful as a screen door on a submarine As useful as a wooden frying pan As useful as tits on a bull Body by God, Mind by Mattel. Bright as Alaska in December Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
Could screw up a one car funeral Doesn’t have both oars in the water Doesn’t have all his corn flakes in one box Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash Doesn’t have all the dots on his dice Donated his body to science before he was done using it Dumb as a corn cob. Dumb as a stump. Dumber than a bag of hammers. Dumber than a bag of rocks
Dumber than a lobotomized rock
Elevator don’t quiet make the top floor Fell out of the family tree Forgot to pay his brain bill Goes surfing in Nebraska Golf bag doesn’t have a full set of irons Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn’t watching Gross ignoramus — 144 times worse than a normal ignoramus Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt
This is the one —> Has delusions of adequacy.
Has two brains, one’s lost and the other is out looking for it Having an intelligence rivalled only by garden tools. He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down He had a little too much chlorine in his gene pool. He is so dumb, he would look for a wishbone in a soft-boiled egg. He is so dumb, the only thing he ever read was an eye-chart. He played too much without a helmet He’s got a mind like a steel trap, rusted shut He’s got a leak in his think-tank He’s got a mind like a steel sieve He’s got his feet firmly planted 3 feet above the ground He’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer He’s so dense light bends around him He’s so dumb he couldn’t pour the water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel His belt doesn’t go through all the loops His cheese has slipped off his cracker
His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork His porch light ain’t on I say, that boy is about as sharp as a sack of wet mice If brains were chocolate – he wouldn’t have enough to fill an M&M If brains were dynamite – he wouldn’t have enough to blow his nose If brains were dynamite, he wouldn’t have enough to blow his hat off If brains were gasoline, he couldn’t ride a moped around a fruit loop If brains were taxed, he’d get a rebate If he had a brain, he’d be dangerous If he had another brain, it would be lonely If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week If stupid were a talent, he would be considered gifted
If stupid could fly, you’d be a jet. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change back If you stand close enough to him you can hear the ocean Isn’t firing on all 6 cylinders Isn’t firing on all thrusters Its hard to believe that he beat out half a billion other sperm
If I wanted to kill myself I’d climb your ego and jump to your IQ Kangaroo loose in the top paddock Like a pair of children’s scissors, bright and colorful, but not too sharp Million dollar body and a 2 dollar engine. Mind is in neutral, body is in gear Mind like a rubber bear trap. Needing a few screws tightened Not firing with all spark plugs Not the brightest light in the harbor Not the brightest light on the Christmas tree Not the sharpest hook in the tackle box. Not the sharpest pencil in the box Off his rocker On/off switch is broken in the off position One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl One neuron short of a synapse One taco short of a combination plate One turbine short of an airplane One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests Prime candidate for natural deselection Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse Requires directions to lay sod Room temperature IQ Running about a quart low Running on empty Sets the lowest possible goals, and consistently fails to achieve them. Sharp as a bowling ball. She is so dumb, she couldn’t tell which way an elevator was going if she had two guesses. She is so dumb, when I asked her to pass the plate, she said: “Upper or lower?” She’s not tied too tight to the pier Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled Strong like bear, smart like tractor. Takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch 60 minutes The elevator is stuck between floors. The lights are flashing, the gate is down, but the train isn’t coming The lights are on, but nobody is home. The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead Too dumb to pull his head in before he shuts the window Too many yards between the goal posts Two hub caps short of a Buick. Warning – Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear Was left on the tilt-a-whirl too long as a baby Would be out of her depth in a mud puddle. Your the flower of my life (you blooming idiot) You can’t call him an idiot, you’ll insult all the idiots in the world.
Your mouth is writing checks that your intellect cannot cash
“I’m not saying you’re the dumbest person in the world—but you better hope the dumbest person in the world doesn’t die.”
Surely your parents only met once. Money was involved; no more than a twenty. And they say she was dressed as a boy at the time.
Delusions of Adequacy 