It wouldn’t be my first choice to promote cancer awareness, but it’s quite a feat nevertheless.
ALERT: Man gets lit on fire as he pulls a police car with his pen-s in an attempt to raise awareness for prostate cancer.
John Stephenson, 50, is a strong man who, using a rope attached to his genitals, became the first person to pull a car, a 2-ton French police vehicle, with… pic.twitter.com/XgWEHFNopg
Are there more important stories we could be covering? Sure, I guess. Iran is still a thing. Trump is going to China. Democrats are being all a noun and a verb and a “raaaaaacism” over redistricting. Plus, generally speaking, when we here at the Louder with Crowder Dot Com website write about testicles, it involves a dude whipping them out in the girls’ bathroom and Democrats supporting them doing so. It’s nice to have someone put their balls to good use for a change.
John Stephenson, a 50-year-old kickboxer, shattered a glass ceiling, becoming the first bloke to pull a two-ton car with nothing but his dong WHILE set on fire. Technically, he didn’t use his entire one-eyed trouser snake, piece of pork, wife’s best friend, his Percy or his cock (he’s British, so I’m biting off of the Monty Python song). He just used his nuts. He also set himself on fire too. Why? Good question.
I’ve pulled a car with my testicles before and I’ve pulled a car on fire – so I thought why not combine the both, but this time do it with my penis.
Rest assured, everything is still intact! Stephen says that while “it did hurt quite a bit,” but he likes to set challenges and this was something no one has done before. He did the research.
Model City: Portland’s Journey From Symbol of Chic to Shabby – In 2012, it was keep Portland wierd. By 2018, it turned into a shithole with homeless and druggies everywhere. Now, people want to ge out and nobody wants to buy their houses or move there. It’s the liberal poster boy of how to ruin a good city
Germany Faces Gas Shortage Crisis: Industry Demands Strategic Reserve – It is remarkable that Germany has largely ignored fundamental questions of energy market design and the security of grids with baseload energy for years—a consequence of ideologically driven decisions. Trump warned them not to do it, but did they listen? FAFO
They Are All Part of One Big Club and You Should Be Thankful That You Aren’t in It – Gates, Clintons, Rothschilds, Royals. All of them were people that did things normal people wouldn’t think of doing. They’ll all get away with it until their meeting with Satan, because it takes that kind of moral pertritude to do what they did.
Liberal Women
Women Overwhelmingly Value Equity and Emotional Safety Over the Pursuit of Truth, Academic Freedom [VIDEO] – The world isn’t equal, and never has been. Read the Epstein story above and you’ll see how different people are. We were made to struggle to overcome and learn. Life is tough, on everyone. I understand them wanting to prioritze emotional safety, but it’s just not going to happen, because it never has. Butch up and get tougher. That’s the way life is
Feminizing Star Wars and making it woke destroyed the franchise, one of the most beloved. Girls aren’t hero’s, nor can they defeat men in battle. The only good thing is it helped ruin Hollywood woke crap. It lost Disney billions (when you include the shit they made Marvel into)
Maybe their replacements will know what they didn’t. That women in Hollywood always had equality with men — in front of the camera, on the screen, as real women not fake men.
Kathleen Kennedy Blames ‘Star Wars’ Fans for Not Liking Her Bad Movies – Kennedy can’t see it because she doesn’t want to, but that’s the reason her projects failed. She doesn’t even understand what makes for quality storytelling. To her, it’s as simple as checking some boxes. It isn’t.
Encoding Photonic Qubits – it’s a good discussion of how things work in that world. At one point, the world thought the telephone was too complicated, yet now it is ubiquitous. I don’t see it being on anyone’s phone in the near future, but we’ll be using this technology, even if in the background and we don’t know that we are.
When I was growing up, the joke was big black dildo. We made endless jokes about size, girth, comparability to the real thing, and so forth. But seriously, Green? What, is there some Martian with a unit that would put the brothers to shame, or is the stud of the ‘hood?
Now, the WNBA lost it’s star attraction and they offer the world and other sports leagues green dildo’s. They are a joke without Caitlin. The mascot of the WNBA is a gree didldo, but then a lot of them are lesbians anyway so it’s not all that unfamiliar.
During the game, a sex toy was thrown on the field to continue the craze that originated in the WNBA, which resulted in a security guard having to scoop it up so it didn’t interrupt things. And here’s what made the scene even more hilarious: After removing the dildo, the guard received a loud ovation from fans.
The dildo, which was bright green like all of the other sex toy incidents, was thrown onto a Soldier Field end zone from the stands. Fortunately, there was no delay in the game thanks to the security guard.
🚨🚨BREAKING🚨🚨
A GREEN DILDO WAS THROWN ON THE FIELD OF THE #BEARS – #PACKERS GAME.
Marriage Monday Memes – I thought this was one of the better ones, although I had to explain the pineapple juice reference to one of my friends. That tells me what I needed to know about his wife without him saying so.
French pole vaulter Anthony Ammirati’s bulge might have played a role in costing him Olympic gold — but now it’s given him the chance for some major green.
After Ammirati’s bulge clipped the crossbar during his pole vault heat at the 2024 Summer Olympics on Saturday, August 3, the image spread like wildfire on social media as viewers marveled at his endowment, while lamenting what it had taken from him.
As it turns out, Ammirati’s misfortune also caught the attention of adult entertainment company CamSoda who offered him $250,000 in exchange for a 60-minute cam show.
In a letter obtained by Us Weekly, CamSoda Vice President Daryn Parker made the offer to Ammirati, 21, to show off his “goods” in exchange for the big payday.
Anthony Ammirati failed the bar and the commentators are clearly having a hard time acknowledging what happened 😂 HELP I'M DYING pic.twitter.com/5hOHttVA5g
OAK BROOK, Ill.—An Oscar Mayer Wienermobile got into a pickle on a Chicago highway.
The hot-dog shaped Wienermobile hit a car Monday morning along Interstate 294 and its driver lost control and overcorrected, causing it to roll onto its side near the Chicago suburb of Oak Brook, Illinois State Police said.
No injuries were reported after the crash, which prompted the closure of the right lane of northbound I-294 for more than an hour, officials said.
A spokesperson for the Oscar Mayer brand, which has several Wienermobiles, told the Chicago Sun-Times it’s “grateful that everybody involved is safe and there were no injuries.”
Video from the crash scene shows that the yellow and orange Wienermobile was later hauled away on a flatbed truck with apparent damage visible on part of the vehicle.
President Joe Biden’s campaign staff is scrambling to excuse the candidate from a golf contest against his 2024 opponent, former President Donald Trump.
The two presidential candidates clashed at their first debate of the cycle on June 27, where their skill at the gentleman’s sport became a point of contention.
“I just won two club championships, not even senior, two regular club championships,” Trump said on the debate stage in response to a question about his age and fitness. “To do that, you have to be quite smart, and you have to be able to hit the ball a long way. And I do it. He doesn’t do it.
“He can’t hit a ball 50 yards,” the former president continued. “He challenged me to a golf match. He can’t hit a ball 50 yards.”
“Look, I’d be happy to have a driving contest with him,” Biden said in response. “I got my handicap, which, when I was vice president, down to a 6.”
“And by the way, I told you before I’m happy to play golf if you carry your own bag. Think you can do it?”
This bravado from Biden echoes a post made to the president’s X account earlier in the year enthusiastically challenging Trump to face him on the links.
Any man vs man contest is a dick measuring contest.
It turned out that Biden pussed out. I’ll cut him slack on his health, but he’s been a braggart all his life and now he gets called to the mat and can’t back up his bravado talk.
The real contest is who has the biggest balls here, and I’m going with Trump
Someone just pulled up to the Donald Trump hush money trial outside Manhattan Criminal Court in a UHaul and released dozens of pink balloons in the shape of male genitalia with the faces of DA Alvin Bragg, Judge Juan Merchan, and Special Counsel Jack Smith on them. pic.twitter.com/cnXrxEYLXU
Lane Kiffin and the University of Mississippi are reportedly hiring former Texas Longhorns personnel guy Billy Glasscock to be the team’s general manager, per ESPN’s Chris Low, and I honestly haven’t laughed this hard since Noah Knigga burst onto the college football scene.
Glasscock spent three years as a player personnel operator for Texas and previously served in similar roles at NC State and the University of Minnesota, per Low.
What about me when I wake up and try to pee and my dick won’t cooperate. There’s your hardest wood, either that or a teenage boy looking at naked girls. You could cut diamonds with that wood.
Oklahoma law enforcement officer David Dewitt is on the wrong side of the law after an alleged sex toy store fight.
The Pottawatomie County sheriff’s commander was charged with assault and battery after an alleged incident in Oklahoma City at Christie’s Toy Box, according to Fox25.
Dewitt allegedly entered the store with a woman and repeatedly argued with her when she wanted to purchase something…..for possibly the funniest reason imaginable.
The issue was the main sextoy in question the woman wanted was “bigger than him.”
That led to Dewitt allegedly raising his hands in threatening fashion, and a clerk intervened. The Oklahoma LEO responded by stating, “Fuck you, I’m a cop.”
Eventually, the situation cooled down before eventually going off the rails when the clerk asked Dewitt if he needed batteries for the sex toy, according to the same report.
Dewitt allegedly asked the clerk, “What the f**k you say to me, fat boy?” He then allegedly attacked the clerk and repeatedly struck him in the face and ribs.
He was eventually arrested but not before telling the clerk, “Call the f*cking cops. I’m an officer of the law. You don’t f*cking assault me. I can have you arrested, jailed to where you never get out.”
Yes, threatening a guy with life in prison after allegedly beating the hell out of him over a sex toy. Very rational, normal and calm.
When the male serotine bat’s penis is erect, it is “seven times longer and wider” than the female’s vagina, making intromission impossible. Instead, males have been found to use their penis as a “copulatory arm,” per the study.
I don’t recall that ever being a complaint about me.
It turns out that being a liberal man makes you soft. A new analysis shows that 30 million men battle erectile dysfunction.
According to the numbers, E.D. — a euphemism for men who can’t get hard for their ladies, etc. — treatment is mostly sought after among men with progressive views.
Are all the masculine men conservative?
“Do you want to know one of the saddest realizations I recently had? Was that as a liberal woman, it is really hard to find a man who is willing to play the more traditional masculine role in the relationship in today’s day and age who is not a conservative. A man who wants to pay on the first date, who wants to open the door, who has that want and desire to care of you and to provide who is not a conservative,” she explained in the now-viral video.
Liberal Woman complains about dating lib men bc they're not men… continues dating them
Per Viagra, the little blue pill company, the figures could also be more than 30 million men with E.D. in the States. The Daily Mail relayed a study declaring men with liberal views request more prescription pills for E.D.
It’s no secret that the new generation has been getting softer. It’s perfectly evident when the Barbie (2023) movie manages to gross over $100 million on its opening weekend (good movie, though).
“smh” – Lib #1
Viagra noted that the 30 million men currently struggling with E.D. in America doubles the amount compared to men in the early 2000s.
The numbers also note that we are now at the point where 25 percent of guys under 40 struggle to get it up.
Leading causes for the dip in sex drive for modern men include obesity, rising consumption of porn and the two most popular words of the decade: mental health. All that’s missing is a Garth Brooks tee and you’ve got the archetype of a liberal man.
“Amy Schumer is funny, and I have E.D.” – Lib #2“The economy’s great.” – Lib #3
There’s also something to be said about the rising rate of vegetarianism and veganism among men, which teaches that salads can replace pulled pork. No meat means lower T.
So yes, groundbreaking stuff there. Men with progressive views aren’t manly and tough, while guys that lean more conservative have BBQ sauce running in their veins. The study really puts the d in “data” (lowercase, of course).
Now liberal men impatiently wait for State Farm’s numbers on higher rates of tractors falling into lakes between libs and conservatives. Call it a small victory.
Why am I not surprised? They act like dicks instead of using common sense. When you buy into that liberal thinking, it’s bound to make your dick soft, or just be a dickhead.
A surprising source of PFAS exposure and pollution is toilet paper, as a recent study reveals.
Toilet paper has been shown to contain significant doses of PFAS chemicals linked to impaired testicular function in men. 👇
A study from March of this year revealed that significant quantities of PFAS are found in virtually every brand of toilet paper on the market. The average American will use 26kg of toilet paper a year. 19+ billion lb of toilet paper are flushed down American toilets each year.
PFAS (per- and poly-fluoroalkyl substances) are vicious hormone-disrupting chemicals that are ubiquitous today because of their use in plastics, fire retardants, non-stick coatings, ammunition and contact lenses, among other things. PFAS are also obesogenic and linked to a…
wide variety of other conditions like cancers and auto-immune disorders.
If you want to read more about PFAS, try my latest article for American Greatness.
In the recent study, the researchers looked at toilet paper and sewage from around the world and tested for the presence of 34 different types of PFAS.
PFAS chemicals are regularly used in paper-manufacturing.
Recycled paper will often get a double dose (i.e. once when the paper was first made, then again when it’s recycled).
The PFAS most present in toilet paper and sewage was 6:2 diPAP, which has been linked to impaired testicular function in men (👇).
6:2 diPAP was 91% of all PFAS detected in the toilet paper samples, and 54% in the sewage samples. Toilet paper usage contributes PFAS to the water supply in the parts per billion. The EPA measures dangerous levels of PFAS in parts per TRILLION…
What’s even worse about 6:2 diPAP is that it is a precursor chemical. It can become far worse chemicals by interacting with human waste, including PFOA, among the most dangerous forms of PFAS. It’s likely that toilet paper may be putting large quantities of PFOA into wastewater.
It’s also probable that the anus is therefore also a significant source of PFAS absorption into the body.
Maybe what we need now is a brand of organic PFAS-free right-wing toilet paper…
Lab-grown meat is often made using immortalized cell lines, which, unlike regular cells, are capable of continuously dividing and growing in a manner similar to cancer cells, according to Bloomberg. Companies developing lab-grown meats have largely remained silent about the connection between their product and cancer cells, possibly in a bid to keep consumers from getting skittish about their products.
Delusions of Adequacy 