ByJenn Granneman July 6, 2026
Introverted kids have an inner world that is alive and present for them. They engage with the deeper aspects of life.
As an introverted child, I split my time between a small town in Minnesota and my imagination. I was content spending entire afternoons alone, writing books on construction paper and daydreaming.
As a teenager, I had a group of friends I loved, but spending time with them drained me. They didn’t seem to need the same amount of alone time that was critical for me to function. I convinced myself that they were the normal ones and I should try to be more like them.
I found out later in life that there’s a name for people like me: introvert.Being an introvert means you get tired from socializing and need time alone to get your energy back. Introverts have some great qualities that extroverts might not have. Also, about half of all people are introverts, meaning there are many of us “quiet ones” in society.
As time passed, I changed a lot from the shy kid I once was. I’ve written two books: The Secret Lives of Introverts and Sensitive, which was named an Amazon Best Book of the Year.
But one thing about me that hasn’t changed is being an introvert. I still enjoy writing, daydreaming, and spending time by myself. As I explain in my book, this is because whether someone is an introvert or an extrovert is something we’re born with, and it’s mostly decided by our genes. In fact, according to Dr. Marti Olsen Laney, children may start to show signs of introversion as early as four months old.
So, what are introverts like as kids? While each child is unique, many introverted children share these seven traits.
7 Common Characteristics of Introverted Children
1. Introverted kids have a deep and lively inner life.
Their private inner world of thoughts and emotions is very much alive for them. They depend on this inner world and their own ideas to help them make decisions, instead of always looking to others for approval or help. “In their private garden away from the material world they concentrate and puzzle out complex and intricate thoughts and feelings,” writes Dr. Laney.
Because of this inner world, introverted children like playing make-believe and being alone. You’ll often see them alone in their rooms or secluded places, doing things like reading, drawing, or playing on the computer.
However, this deep inner world can sometimes make them feel cut off from other kids. They might be called “weird” for having imaginary friends or for wanting to spend time alone, like sitting by themselves during recess. That’s why it’s important for parents to help introverted kids see that their introversion is actually a strength.
2. They are curious and engage with the deeper aspects of life.
Introverted kids might be quiet, but they are very curious about the world. They often ask big questions about how things work, why things are the way they are, or what something really means. They can surprise adults with their creativity and problem-solving skills, showing wisdom that seems beyond their age. Even when they are young, many introverted kids have the ability to step outside themselves and reflect on their own behavior, which is something not all children can do.
3. They observe first and act later.
Introverted kids often stay on the sidelines in groups or crowds, just like introverted adults do at big parties. They might seem shy about joining in, but it’s not always because they’re scared. Introverts, even grown-ups, like to think things through before they act, especially in social situations. You might see introverted kids open up and be chatty, funny, and playful at home where they feel safe and comfortable.
4. They make decisions based on their own values, not just on what’s popular.
Introverted kids often think and feel deeply, which means they usually make choices based on their own ideas and values, not just because something is popular. They may do things their own way, picking music, clothes, TV shows, and hobbies they truly like, not just what everyone else thinks is cool. This might sometimes make them different from other kids, but it’s also good because it means they’re less likely to blindly follow others. They don’t do things just to fit in with everyone else.
5. It takes time for their real personality to come out.
Just like introverted adults, introverted kids don’t show their real personality immediately. At first, they might be quiet and keep to themselves when meeting someone new. But as they get more comfortable with that person, they start to open up more. They like to have meaningful conversations to understand themselves or others better. They’re interested in getting to know people deeply. They often try to figure out why people do what they do.
Delusions of Adequacy 