Category: quotes

And Then All Of A Sudden, I Heard Dueling Banjo’s

Appalachian Queer Film Festival

At this point, you would have to move to Appalachia to avoid having LGBTism rubbed in your face. No wait; that might not be far enough:

Since 2014, the annual Appalachian Queer Film Fest has brought attention and recognition to Queer filmmakers. Starting as an initiative to bring queer film and culture into the Appalachian region, the event has brought inspiration and recognition to queer art for over a decade.

This year’s fest will occur in Shepherdstown, West Virginia , featuring a movie that glorifies transsexual ACLU lawyer Chase Strangio:

“HEIGHTENED SCRUTINY” displays the decisive legal battle, (United States v. Skrmetti), where Chase Strangio worked to overturn the ban on gender-affirming care for trans youth in Tennessee.

That is, she worked to inflict grotesque sex change procedures on innocent children. Readers previously encountered Miss Strangio when she call for subjecting children as young as 2 years to such horrors and when she updated the Newspeak Dictionary by abnormalizing normal people with the term nontransgender.

Politicized perversion has been injected into every nook and cranny of the country. Escape is no longer an option; we are left to push back.

source

Pun Day

1.   The fattest knight at King Arthur’s Round Table was Sir Cumference.   He acquired his size from too much pi.

2.   I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island.   It turned out to be an optical Aleutian.  

3.   She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.   

4.   A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class,   because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5.   No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.   

6.   A dog gave birth to puppies near the road .. . . and was cited for littering.   

7.   A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8.   Two silk worms had a race.  They ended up in a tie.

9.   A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.   The police are looking into it.   

10.  Time flies like an arrow.  Fruit flies like a banana.

11.  Atheism is a non-prophet organization.   

12.  Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the  hallway.  One hat said to the other: ‘You stay here; I’ll go on a head.’ 

13.   I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.    Then it hit me.     

14.   A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said:  ‘Keep off the Grass.’   

15.   The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.  

16.   The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.  

17.   A backward poet writes inverse.   

18.   In a democracy it’s your vote that counts.   In feudalism it’s your count that votes.   

19.   When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.  

20.   If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you’d be in Seine.

21.   A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons.  The stewardess looks at him and says, ‘I’m sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.’   

22.   Two fish swim into a concrete wall.    One turns to the other and says ‘Dam!’         

23.   Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.   Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.  

24.   Two hydrogen atoms meet.  One says, ‘I’ve lost my electron.’   The other says ‘Are you sure?’   The first replies, ‘Yes, I’m positive.’   

25.   Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?   His goal:  transcend dental medication.  

26.   There was the person who sent ten puns to friends,   with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.   No pun in ten did.

A Complete List of Murphy’s Laws

Note: This was first printed in 2019 but I keep getting requests for it, so here you go.

  • If anything can go wrong it will at the most inopportune time.
  • The greater the value of the rug, the greater the probability that the cat will throw up on it.
  • If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong (or the one to go wrong first).
  • The other line always moves faster.
  • The chance of the buttered side of the bread falling face down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • In any hierarchy, each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and then remains there. (Also known as the “Peter Principle”)
  • Anything dropped in the bathroom will fall in the toilet.
  • After you bought a replacement for something you’ve lost and searched for everywhere, you’ll find the original.
  • The best golf shots happen when you are alone (and the worst when playing with someone you want to impress).
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
  • Traffic is inversely proportional to how late you are, or are going to be.
  • A falling object will always land where it can do the most damage.
  • The probability of being observed is directly proportional to the stupidity of one’s actions.
  • You will always find something in the last place you look.
  • Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

Of course you can go to the Murphy’s Law site and see all of this there.

Murphy’s laws

  • If anything can go wrong, it will
    Corollary: It can
    Corollary sent by Dr. Allen Roberds
    Corollary: It should
    MacGillicuddy’s Corollary: At the most inopportune time
    Corollary sent by Earl R. Johnson
    Extension: it will be all your fault, and everyone will know it.
    Extension sent by 
  • If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong
    Extreme version:
    If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the FIRST to go wrong
    Extreme version sent by 
  • If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway
  • If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop
    Corollary: It will be impossible to fix the fifth fault, without breaking the fix on one or more of the others
    Corollary sent by Sean Cheshire
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse
  • If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
  • Nature always sides with the hidden flaw
    Corollary: The hidden flaw never stays hidden for long.
    Corollary sent by Dave M.
  • Mother nature is a bitch
    Addendum: and not an obedient one at that
    Addendum sent by 
  • Murphy’s Law of Thermodynamics
    Things get worse under pressure.
  • The Murphy Philosophy
    Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
  • Quantization Revision of Murphy’s Laws
    Everything goes wrong all at once.
  • Murphy’s Constant
    Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
  • Murphy’s Law of Research
    Enough research will tend to support whatever theory.
  • Research supports a specific theory depending on the amount of funds dedicated to it.
    Sent by Tony ’68
  • Addition to Murphy’s Laws
    In nature, nothing is ever right. Therefore, if everything is going right … something is wrong.
  • More Laws
  • Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
  • It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
  • Rule of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer.
    Corollary: Provided, of course, that you know there is a problem.
  • Nothing is as easy as it looks.
  • Everything takes longer than you think.
  • Everything takes longer than it takes.
    Sent by Jon Carpenter
  • If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
  • Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
  • Every solution breeds new problems.
  • The legibility of a copy is inversely proportional to its importance.
  • no matter how perfect things are made to appear, Murphy’s law will take effect and screw it up.
    Sent by Mitch
  • You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
  • The chance of the buttered side of the bread falling face down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
    Sent by Paul Breen
  • The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • More Laws of Selective Gravitation.
  • A falling object will always land where it can do the most damage.
  • A shatterproof object will always fall on the only surface hard enough to crack or break it.
  • A paint drip will always find the hole in the newspaper and land on the carpet underneath (and will not be discovered until it has dried).
  • A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) – unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).
  • If a dish is dropped while removing it from the cupboard, it will hit the sink, breaking the dish and chipping or denting the sink in the process.
  • A valuable dropped item will always fall into an inaccessible place (a diamond ring down the drain, for example) – or into the garbage disposal while it is running.
  • If you use a pole saw to saw a limb while standing on an aluminum ladder borrowed from your neighbor, the limb will fall in such a way as to bend the ladder before it knocks you to the ground.
  • If you pick up a chunk of broken concrete and try to pitch it into an adjacent lot, it will hit a tree limb and come down right on the driver’s side of your car windshield.
  • More Laws of Selective Gravitation were sent by Jack from the Classic CKLW Page
  • The greater the value of the rug, the greater the probability that the cat will throw up on it.
    Sent by Ralph
  • You will always find something in the last place you look.
  • If your looking for more than one thing, you’ll find the most important one last.
    Sent by Alegna
  • It is never in the last place you look. It is in the first place you look, but never discovered on the first attempt.
    Sent by Peter
  • After you bought a replacement for something you’ve lost and searched for everywhere, you’ll find the original.
    Sent by Dizzy
  • You have to look where you lost it.
    Sent by ClaytonPrc@aol.com
  • No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you’ve bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.
  • The other line always moves faster.
  • In order to get a personal loan, you must first prove you don’t need it.
  • Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost you more than you thought.
  • If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up.
  • If it jams – force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
  • When a broken appliance is demonstrated for the repairman, it will work perfectly.
  • Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.
  • Everyone has a scheme for getting rich that will not work.
  • In any hierarchy, each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and then remains there.
  • There’s never time to do it right, but there’s always time to do it over.
  • When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
  • Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening.
  • Murphy’s golden rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.
  • A Smith & Wesson beats four aces.
  • In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
  • Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference.
  • Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
  • No good deed goes unpunished.
    Sent by John Cougar and by getalife who asks “who wrote that?”.
    Illustrious Blackbird knew the answer, it was Samuel L. Clemens also known as Mark Twain.
  • Where patience fails, force prevails.
    Sent by Woody.
  • Erma Bombeck
    “Anything dropped in the bathroom will fall in the toilet.
    Sent by Amwood1@amwoodhomes.com.
  • Heisenberg indetermination principle applied to ill luck:
    The better you know the amount of ill luck that will strike you,
    the worse you know when this will happen,
    and vice-versa.
    and Relativistic correction of Murphy’s law:
    Whether things can go wrong or not, it depends on your frame of reference.
    Corollary (otherwise said: ill luck is actually absolute):
    Regardless of your frame of reference, things will go wrong anyway.
    Were sent by Simone Penzavalle.
  • If you want something bad enough, chances are you won’t get it.
  • If you think you are doing the right thing, chances are it will back-fire in your face.
  • When waiting for traffic, chances are that when one lane clears the other is congested.
  • Just when you think things cannot get any worse, they will.
  • Remember the “Boomer-rang” effect; Whatever you do will always come back.
  • If you re-act to actions, you’ve acted on actions.
  • He who angers you controls you, there-fore you have no control over your anger.
    The last SEVEN laws were sent by Leesa,
    Thank you.
  • Any time you put an item in a “safe place”, it will never be seen again.
  • Your best golf shots always occur when playing alone.
  • The worst golf shots always occur when playing with someone you are trying to impress.
  • No matter how hard you try, you cannot push a string.
    (getting everyone in the family to the car at the same time for example)
  • The fish are always biting….yesterday!
  • You will never leave a parking space without someone in an adjacent space leaving at the same time.
    Sent by Sean Murphy
  • The cost of the hair do is directly related to the strength of the wind.
  • Great ideas are never remembered and dumb statements are never forgotten.
  • The clothes washer/dryer will only eat one of each pair of socks.
    EIGHT laws were sent by Charles L. Mays,
    Thank you.
  • When you see light at the end of the tunnel, the tunnel will cave in.
    Sent by Fridrik Bjarnason
    Or in another version
    The light at the end of the tunnel is a train
    Sent by Steve
  • Cole’s Law:
    Thinly sliced cabbage.
    Sent by Michael
  • Being dead right, won’t make you any less dead.
    and
    Having the right of way, won’t make you any less dead.
    Sent by anonymous
  • Whatever you want, you can’t have, what you can have, you don’t want.
  • Whatever you want to do, is Not possible, what ever is possible for you to do, you don’t want to do it.
  • Traffic is inversely proportional to how late you are, or are going to be.
  • The complexity and frustration factor is inversely proportional to how much time you have left to finish, and how important it is.
    The four last laws were sent by Joe
  • Crespins law of observation:
    the probability of being observed is in direct proportion to the stupidity of ones actions
    Sent by R. Crespin esq.
  • If you go to bed with an itchy ass, you wake up with smelly fingers.
    Sent by Chris Davidsen, from Norway.
  • A knowledge of Murphy’s Law is no help in any situation.
  • If you apply Murphy’s Law, it will no longer be applicable.
  • If you say something, and stake your reputation on it, you will lose your reputation.
  • no matter where I go, there I am
    Sent by John Davenport
  • Where patience fails, force prevails.
    Sent by Woody
  • Murphy’s Law Current Revision
    Any thing that can go wrong, HAS Already Gone Wrong!
    You just haven’t been notified.
  • The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not “Eureka!” but “That’s funny…”
    Said by Isaac Asimov
  • A former colleague of Russell Cooper once claimed that Murphy had plagiarized his “Gamble’s Law” which says that “The letter box is always on the other side of the road”
  • If many things can go wrong, they will all go wrong at the same time.
  • If anything can go wrong, it will happen to the crankiest person.
    Sent by Timothy Boilard
  • Waxman’s Law:
    Everything tastes more or less like chicken.
    Last two laws were sent by Del Ross
  • Skarstad’s Observation
    You will never find any more loose change than you have already lost.
    Sent by Gayle
  • If authority was mass, stupidity would be gravity.
    Sent by Greg
  • all good things come to those who wait…
    but , don’t wait too long or they will pass you by…
    like 2 ships that pass in the night…
    never again to return that same exact site.
    Sent by Jujuakita
  • If anything was worth doing, it would’ve already been done.
    Corollary: Nothing is worth doing.
    Sent by D-D-D-Dave
  • You can do anything except light a paper match on a marshmallow under water
    Sent by John
  • Ants will always infest the nearest food cupboard.
    Sent by anonymous
  • Long’s Law
    Those who know the least will always know it the loudest.
    Sent by Chris Moore
  • McFalls’ Maxim
    No degree of acceptance can ever change the facts.
    Translation: You may come to terms with being screwed, but nevertheless you’re still screwed.
    Sent by Oliver McFalls
  • Hunter’s Corollary to Murphy’s Law:
    Things always go from bad to worse.
  • Hunter’s Observation on Beauty:
    Beauty is only skin deep, fashion even shallower.
  • Hunter’s Observation on Experts:
    An expert is someone with an opinion and a word processor.
  • Hunter’s Observation on Sugarcoating:
    All pornography is air-brushed or computer-enhanced.
  • Hunter’s Observation on hypocrites:
    A person without values or standards can never be a hypocrite.
  • Hunter’s Observation on Education and Oz:
    “We can give you a diploma, but we can’t give you a brain.”
    The last six laws were sent by Hunter
  • Sgt. Murphy’s Law
    Don’t get into a pissing contest with a skunk.
    Sent by Bird Waring
  • The Law of Stupid Tricks
    Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD.
    Sent by Zenjive
  • Garbage abhors a vacuum. It will grow to fill available space.
    Corollary: The more space you have, the more junk you’ll have.
    Sent by Magycke
  • Paper is always strongest at the perforation.
    Sent by Mike
  • Things are never as good as they are bad.
    Sent by Scott Miller
  • Chaos always wins, because it’s better organized.
    Sent by Regards Walter citing Terry Pratchett
  • The Wingwalker’s Rule:
    Don’t let go of something until you have a hold of something else.
    Sent by D. Kinloch.
  • A bird in the hand is messy.
    Sent by Ted Machler
  • The mud that won’t come off on the doormat immediately adheres to the carpet.
    Sent by Jenny Pitt
  • When you wear new shoes for the first time, everyone will step on them.
    Sent by Pieter
  • If Murphy’s law is correct, everything East of the San Andreas Fault will slide into the Atlantic – Steven Wright
    Sent by Deke
  • If Murphy’s Law can go wrong it will.
    Sent by Mark
  • Cheer up, the worst is yet to come…
    Sent by Yaron Budowski
  • If at first you don’t succeed destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
    Sent by Damien Hope
  • Mrs. Murphy’s Law:
    If anything can go wrong it will go wrong when Mr. Murphy is out of town….
    Sent by Sharon Murphy
  • If all else fails, hit it with a big hammer.
    Sent by Jeronimo
  • Warneke Law
    You cannot force Murphy’s Law to happen and you can’t use it in reverse.
    Sent by Warneke
  • When something goes wrong, you cannot find the solution in the instruction booklet, but someone else always does.
    Sent by mark peacock
  • Everything in life is important, important things are simple, simple things are never easy.
    Think about it, complete the circle.
    Sent by Sam Diggly who’s dad told her this law after she got married.
  • It takes forever to learn the rules and once you’ve learned them they change again.
    Sent by Tracey Goldstein
  • The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds,
    the pessimist fears this is true.
    Sent by what’d ya say?
  • You will find an easy way to do it, after you’ve finished doing it.
    Sent by Conan Rock
  • Hofstadter’s Law:
    It always takes longer than you think, even when you take into account Hofstadter’s Law.
    Sent by Ben Jones
  • In Las Vegas, wherever you want to go in a casino, it’s as far as possible from where you are, no matter where you are.
    Sent by Lois Weiner
  • The wind will always blow opposite to your hairdo
    Sent by G B
  • Wind velocity increases directly with the cost of the hairdo.
  • The probability of the toast landing peanut-butter-side-down is directly proportionate to the cost of the carpeting.
    Sent by Keith Hipkins
  • Laundry Math:1 Washer + 1 Dryer + 2 Socks = 1 Sock
    Sent by Bryan Ortiz
  • Window polishing:
    It’s always on the other side.
    Sent by Jakob Sultan
  • Hall’s Law:
    Anyone who isn’t paranoid simply isn’t paying attention.
    Sent by Colin
  • (Another) Hall’s Law
    Minor problem isn’t.
    Sent by Philip Hilbert Hall
  • A valuable falling in a hard to reach place will be exactly at the distance of the tip of your fingers.
  • If a valuable falls in a hard to reach place at a distance shorter than the tip of your finger, as soon as you try to reach it you’ll push it to that distance.
    The last two laws were sent by Luciano Quinones
  • If it looks good,
    And it taste good,
    And it feels good,
    There has got to be something wrong some where,
    So be careful.
    Sent by Shirley Cameron
  • Two heads are better than one, even if one is a sheep head.
    Sent by Robert Dion
  • The probability of rain is inversely proportional to the size of the umbrella you carry around with you all day.
    Sent by GKarlitz1@aol.com
  • No matter how hard you try, every once in a while, something is going right.
  • Behind every little problem there’s a larger problem, waiting for the little problem to get out of the way.
    The last two laws were sent by Robert K White
  • When you really need something, its either not available, or can’t be found.  When you don’t need it, its either available, or lays around in plain sight.
    Sent by Robert Van Sile
  • Whenever you cut your finger nails, you find a need for them an hour later.
    Sent by Jeff S
  • Law of Conservation of Filth:
    In order for something to get clean, something else must get dirty.
    Conclusion to the Law of Conservation of Filth:
    It is possible for everything to get dirty and nothing to get clean.
    Sent by Scott Tietjen,  AKA, “Great Scott”
  • The file you are looking for is always at the bottom of the largest pile.
    Sent by Larry
  • Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself.
    Sent by G Martin
  • Gumperson’s Law:
    The likelihood of something happening is in inverse proportion to the desirability of it happening.
    Sent by Ken Kaplan
  • Uffelman’s Razor:
    [Given Murphy’s law, …] One should not attribute to evil design any unfortunate result which can be attributed to error. A mistake (or series of mistakes) is the simpler and more likely explanation.
    Conspiracy Corollary to Uffelman’s Razor:
    Nothing should be attributed to conspiracy that can be explained by error or a succession of errors.

    • Example 1: The alleged conspiracy to “fake” the Apollo moon landing.
      Such an undertaking would be so likely to result in multiple glitches that it would be nearly impossible to pull off. Thus, conspiracy is an unlikely explanation of events. Accordingly, the “evidence” of the “faked” landing is more likely a result of the errors of those interpreting the evidence than of the evil design of the alleged conspirators.
    • Example 2: The Warren Report.
      Any open questions in the Warren Report are more likely the result of the errors of the Warren commission, or the errors of those interpreting the Warren Report, than the result of a conspiracy to cover up the true facts.

    copyright 1995, 2002. David G. Uffelman

  • Probability law:
    Probabilities serve only and exclusively to determine the degree of improbability of the catastrophes that actually take place.
    Corollary: If something is likely to happen AND desirable, it won’t happen.
    Sent by Sylvain Galibert
  • Common Sense Is Not So Common
  • Power Is Taken… Not Given
    Sent by John  Burke
  • Two wrongs don’t make a right. It usually takes three or four.
  • If the truth is in your favor no one will believe you.
    The last two laws were sent by Lenny Quites
  • When things go from bad to worse, the cycle repeats.
    Sent by Rivers
  • Laws are like a spider web, in that it snares the poor and weak while the rich and powerful brake them.
    Solon, ancient Greece
    Sent by Red
  • key to happiness is to be O.K. with not being O.K.
    Sent by Divya
  • The two most abundant things in all the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
    Sent by Ross Henderson
    and another version to this law
    The most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen, stupidity and opinions.
    Sent by Martin and Henrik from Denmark
  • Stupidity is the fundamental driving force of the Universe, which explains why stupid people always go wrong.
    Sent by Anonymousepad
  • Every rule has an exception except the Rule of Exceptions.
    Sent by GL Roberts
  • If your action has a 50% possibility of being correct, you will be wrong 75% of the time.
    Sent by Bob Holdegraver
  • If you plan for something to go wrong, and it doesn’t go wrong, it would have been ultimately profitable for it to go wrong.
    Sent by John Wilson
  • Common sense isn’t.
    Sent by Joe Facchini
  • The difference between Stupidity and Genius is that Genius has its limits.
    Sent by Mark M Stevens
  • The universe is great enough for all possibilities to exist.
    Sent by Elizabeth A. Kennedy
  • Those who don’t take decisions never make mistakes.
    Sent by Asier Zabarte
  • The only price you pay for greatness is knowing that it can’t last forever.
    Sent by Taranis Valerin
  • Anything that cant possible in a million years go wrong, will go wrong.
  • Anything that seems right, is putting you into a false sense of security.
  • If everything seems great, its already gone wrong.
  • The only time you’re right, is when its about being wrong.
  • The only times something’s right, is when everyone agrees its wrong.
    The last five laws were sent by Thomas Wrobel
  • If a Murphy law is tried to be used to have a desired outcome, the law will backfire.
    Sent by Pat M.
  • Its never so bad it couldn’t be worse.
    Sent by Raymond J. Gunn that says that his friend George Brabbs use to say it, then he died, now he wonders
  • Andrew’s Law
    When saying that things can not possibly get any worse – they will
    Sent by Andrew Milbourne
  • Murphy’s Metalaw
    Knowing Murphy’s Law will never help.
  • Occult Principle of Murphism
    To know Murphy’s Law is to draw its attention.
  • Avoidance Law
    If for some reason Murphy’s Law fails to operate, it is building up for something big.
  • Hermetic Murphism
    As above, so below.
  • The big catastrophes are made up of smaller ones.
  • Buddha’s Version of Murphy’s Law
    Decay is inherent in all things, strive unceasingly.
  • Fleming’s corollary:
    Nothing ever gets better.
  • Murphologist’s Curse
    Given time one can develop a sense of how Murphy’s Law will act, but the Murphy Sense will tingle only after it is too late to keep the excreta from impacting the rotating blade based wind generator.
    The last seven laws were sent by Azrias Mordax
  • The probability that something can go wrong is directly proportional to the square of the amount of inconvenience it can cause you
  • Everything that could possibly go wrong for anyone else always seems to happen to you
  • Law of cooperatives
    In any particular situation, if three things can go wrong, they usually do in sequence, each facilitating the occurrence of the next
    The last three laws were sent by Takura Razemba
  • Mr. Murphy warning:
    Don’t mess with Mrs. Murphy
  • Mrs. Murphy’s Law:
    If something goes wrong, it’s Mr. Murphy’s fault.
    Last two laws were sent by Frank O’Neal
  • Mrs. Murphy’s Law
    If anything can go wrong it will, and when it does, the woman will get the blame
    Sent by ginakell@hotmail.com
  • Lewis’ Axiom
    The person ahead of you in the queue, will have the most complex transaction possible
    Sent by Robert Lewis
  • Every problem is replaceable with a bigger one.
    Sent by Nabeel
  • Another name for Murphy’s law: The law of conservation of misery
    Sent by Achten
  • Carvalheiro’s deduction
    If in a particular circumstance Murphy’s law don’t apply, then something must be wrong
    Sent by Filipe Carvalheiro
  • Sharad’s Law
    If Murphy’s law is right then it will go wrong
    Sent by Sharad Bhandari
  • A law about websites:
    The more important it is to get to a website, the greater the chance the server is down.
    Sent by Shaunna
  • Laws about this site:
    The More the number of laws you claim to have, the more the number of laws you are going to miss.
    Sent by Sathish
  • This site won’t open when you want to show someone what exactly Murphy laws are
    Sent by Dinni
  • Remember:
    Shit happens
  • Murphy’s law is intrinsic.
    Sent by wolfram
  • And on the eighth day God said;”O.K. Murphy, you take over!
    Sent by Robert A. Silvestri
  • Larry Niven’s summary of Murphy’s Law:
    The perversity of the universe tends to a maximum.
    Sent by Kevin Boland
  • The road to success is always under construction
    By Anton Figg (?)
  • If in a series events that could have gone wrong and didn’t, It will have been ultimately beneficial for them to have gone wrong in the first place.
    Sent by 
  • Bralek’s Rule for Success:
    Trust only those who stand to lose as much as you.
    Sent by 
  • whatever was supposed to happen, won’t
    Sent by 
  • You can’t expect the unexpected, otherwise there would be no need for the word unexpected
  • You cant reason with the stupid
    The last two laws were sent by 
  • If you lose something that is replaceable (textbooks, clothing etc) as soon as you buy a replacement the original will surface.
    Sent by 
  • Clemens’ Law
    In any given situation, people will act so as to display the maximum possible amount of stupidity for that situation.
    Clemens’ Law short form
    People are stupid.
    Sent by 
  • What goes in must come out.
    Unless it’s the other way around.
    Sent by 
  • Better to be a pessimist than an optimist because when you say the glass is half empty it will have to be refilled
    Sent by 
  • Sooner or later, you will spill your beer
  • Berneathys directional dichotomy
    West is always East of somewhere
  • Berneathys formula fact
    Instruction manuals are for losers
  • Berneathys guide theorem
    You’re only lost if you admit it
  • Berneathys gravitational paradox
    If gravity is all around us, why can’t you push a fat dog down the stairs?
    Last five laws were sent by 
  • Wet Law
    A spoon placed in the sink will locate to maximize splash from the faucet
  • Pack Rat’s Law
    All horizontal surfaces shall be filled to capacity
  • Wife’s Law
    Anything worth doing is well worth over-doing
    Reply:
    Anything over-done isn’t worth the extra effort
    Last three laws were sent by 
  • It’s no the drop that kills you…. its the sudden stop
    Sent by 
  • When things are going right, you won’t notice
  • The cleverness of Murphy’s Laws is inverse proportion to the number of laws
    last two laws were sent by 
  • The entropy of the universe tends to a maximum
    Sent by 
  • and never forget O’Toole’s Corollary or
    Sod’s Law or
    McGillicuddy Law
    Murphy was an optimist
    Well, there are a lot of people who think he was an optimist, aren’t there?
    Or in other words:
    someone else always seems to get the credit for your work.
    The harder you work the more people there will be to claim credit except when it backfires.
    You get all the credit for the dumb move.
    Murphy was an extreme optimist!
    Says Charles L. Mays
  • And we’ll end this page with something optimistic (don’t hit me).
    Don’t worry about Murphy’s Law, you know it’s gonna happen anyway, so just get on with it and get it over with!
    Sent by Ruth Beaty
  • The humor of Murphy’s Law leaves you laughing at the end of the day.
    If you make it through a Murphy Day…you win!

 

Send in any changes, additions or corrections.

Bill Maher Agrees with Trump as He Slams Harvard as an “A-Hole Factory” (Video)

President Donald Trump has made it clear that the American taxpayer will not continue funding the whiny young communists at Harvard.

In April, the Trump administration froze over $2.2 billion in federal research grants and $60 million in contracts to Harvard, citing the university’s failure to adequately address antisemitism on campus.

In May, the administration ordered federal agencies to cancel an estimated $100 million in remaining contracts with Harvard across nine departments.

The administration is also looking to revoke Harvard’s Student and Exchange Visitor Program (SEVP) certification, which would prevent the university from enrolling international students—about 6,800 students, or over a quarter of its student body. This move is currently in flux and is set to go to a hearing after it was temporarily blocked by a federal judge.

President Trump has also publicly suggested revoking Harvard’s tax-exempt status, which saved the university an estimated $465 million in 2023.

While liberals whine about the moves against Harvard, Bill Maher announced on his HBO talk show that he agrees with Trump on the issue, calling Harvard an “A-hole factory.”

“Trump has declared full-scale war on Harvard, and like so many things he does, there’s a kernel of a good idea there,” Maher said on Friday, adding, “I’ve been sh–ing on Harvard long before he was.”

source

I might as well throw salt on the wounds here. It looks like it’s Harvard Day here at the Delusions.

How Do You Tell Others You Are A Dumbass (hint: Hell, I’d rather f**k a turkey) – BWBB

A so-called comedian was apparently off her meds when she launched an insane, hate-filled rant against Elon Musk and the Trump Administration last night.

Former SNL host Leslie Jones was guest-hosting Comedy Central’s The Daily Show on Wednesday night and felt the best way to entertain her audience was to go on a tirade that should open her up to a visit from law enforcement.

The deranged Jones first slammed Musk for wearing a hat to the Trump meeting before seemingly threatening violence.

“If this guy gave me a pink slip, I’d give his a** a black eye. Why don’t you fire one of them hats, b**ch!” Jones yelled while the Daily Show audience cheered.

Jones addressed the Watters clip by mocking Musk for having “so many kids” and quipping ” I would rather f**k a turkey baster. Hell, I’d rather f**k a turkey.”

more plus video

“Every single thing [Biden] touched turned to s–t,” he declared.

The Republican party is now the “proud voice” of everyday Americans across the country — and the party of “common sense,” President Trump declared Saturday during his keynote address at the Conservative Political Action Conference.

“Our party has become the proud voice of hard-working citizens of every race, religion, color and creed, and I think one of the main reasons — not that we are conservative or anything — [is] we are the party of common sense. It’s about common sense,” he told the crowd of about 1,000 at the Gaylord National Resort & Convention Center in National Harbor, Md.

“Over the past month, we’ve confirmed an all-star team of warriors, patriots, visionaries who put the America First agenda into action,” he added.

And his team has been working overtime, he said.

“The fraudsters, liars, cheaters, globalists and deep-state bureaucrats are being sent packing.”

“The fraudsters, liars, cheaters, globalists and deep-state bureaucrats are being sent packing,” the 78-year-old commander in chief crowed to the adoring CPAC crowd of 1,000 at the Gaylord National Resort & Convention Center in National Harbor, Md.

Later, Trump blasted his predecessor, former President Joe Biden, calling him the “worst president in the history of our country.”

“I don’t care. I’ll say it. Jimmy Carter passed away, and he was a happy man when he passed away because it’s not even close,” the president continued in his verbal onslaught.

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A New Superhero – Captian Chaos

Is this the best Hakeem Jeffries can come up with?

The Democratic House minority leader has been a virtual non-factor during the first weeks of President Donald Trump’s second term in office, relegated to the background amid the extraordinary energy coming from the Republican White House.

But he’s making a buzz in a video making the rounds on social media, showing him giving Trump a new nickname — and it’s one Trump supporters are taking like a badge of honor.

more

Fake News-a-Palooza: 50 Examples of Media Misdirection and Manipulation

Reflecting back on 2024 and looking forward to a future with less misinformation and more facts, Just Facts has summarized 50 false or misleading claims spread by journalists, commentators, and so-called fact checkers during the past year.

Each of these examples quotes a specific media outlet or individual, but nearly all of these fictions were propagated by multiple outlets and people, and many of them were broadcast by dozens.

1: Inflation

Margaret Brennan and John Dickerson of CBS News claimed that “the president of the United States has nothing to do with the price of bacon,” “or eggs,” “or gas,” “or any of it.”

In fact, presidents impact the prices of virtually everything through federal deficits that spur inflation, regulations that prohibit the use of cost-effective production methods and resources, price and wage controls, trade deals, tariffs, and more.

2: “Bloodbath”

Reporting on the first assassination attempt against Donald Trump, George Stephanopoulos and Martha Raddatz of ABC News claimed that Trump “contributed” to “violent rhetoric” because he said “it’s going to be a bloodbath” if “I don’t get elected.”

In fact, Trump didn’t use the term “bloodbath” as a call to violence but to describe the effects of Biden’s policies, especially on the auto industry.

3: Crime Trends

PolitiFact reported that “the violent crime rate today is near a 50-year low.”

In fact, that claim is derived from FBI data, which is based on voluntary reports of crimes by state and local law enforcement agencies and “excludes” crimes like “sexual assault,” “simple assault,” “attempted robberies,” and “crimes not reported to law enforcement.”

The DOJ’s National Crime Victimization Survey—which is widely considered to be the “gold standard” for measuring crime trends—showed a 37% increase in violent crime from 2020 to 2023. Moreover, the latest rate of murder—which is the best-measured and worst violent crime—was 36% higher in 2023 than in 2014.

4: Jobs

The New York Times reported that “President Biden is presiding over a job-creation boom that would have gotten almost any of his predecessors re-elected in the postwar era.”

In fact, all real job growth under Biden went to immigrants, while jobs held by people born in the USA barely recovered from Covid lockdowns, are drastically below their pre-Covid trajectory, and flatlined over the past year:

It just gets worse, check out the rest of the lies here

Paul Krugman Retires From His Career Of Being On The Wrong Side Of Economics

I asked AI to list some of his boners. Here’s what came up

Paul Krugman, a Nobel laureate economist and columnist for the New York Times, has been known to make predictions and argue for certain economic policies that have been proven wrong or controversial over time. Here are a few examples:

  1. Predicting the 2008 Financial Crisis: In the years leading up to the 2008 financial crisis, Krugman was skeptical of the severity of the housing bubble and the potential consequences of a housing market crash. He argued that such a scenario was unlikely and that the economy would continue to grow. However, the crisis ultimately occurred, causing a major recession and exposing the flaws in Krugman’s predictions.
  2. Arguing against austerity: Following the 2008 financial crisis, Krugman advocated against austerity measures and argued that governments should focus on boosting spending to stimulate the economy. However, many countries that implemented expansionary fiscal policies saw mixed results, and some economists argued that a more balanced approach to austerity and stimulus was necessary.
  3. Predicting a “double-dip” recession: In 2010, Krugman predicted that the U.S. economy would experience a “double-dip” recession, with a second downturn occurring after an initial recovery. However, the economy continued to grow steadily, and the double-dip recession never materialized.
  4. Arguing against the effectiveness of Quantitative Easing: Krugman has been critical of the Federal Reserve’s use of quantitative easing, arguing that it was not an effective tool for stimulating the economy. Some economists, however, have attributed the recovery of the U.S. economy in part to the Fed’s aggressive monetary policies.

Here’s what a second engine said:

Paul Krugman, despite his reputation as a prominent economist, has made several predictions that did not materialize as he expected. Here are some specific predictions by Krugman that didn’t come true:

Economic Predictions

  1. 2008 Financial Crisis: Krugman failed to anticipate the severity of the 2008 financial crisis1.
  2. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac: In July 2008, Krugman predicted that concerns about a possible collapse of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were “overblown.” Months later, both institutions required massive government bailouts1.
  3. Unemployment Rate: Krugman supported the Obama administration’s stimulus package, which was predicted to keep unemployment below 8%. However, unemployment surpassed 10% despite the stimulus1.

Interest Rates and Fiscal Policy

  1. Zero Lower Bound: Krugman believed that nominal interest rates couldn’t go below 0%. This proved incorrect as some countries experienced negative interest rates2.
  2. Fiscal Austerity: In 2013, Krugman predicted that U.S. budget cuts (the “sequester”) would lead to severe economic damage and possibly a double-dip recession. Instead, the U.S. economy continued to recover2.
  3. Inflation and Deflation
  4. Accelerating Deflation: Krugman’s model predicted accelerating deflation in the face of a prolonged economic slump. In reality, consumer prices rose modestly even as unemployment remained high2.
  5. Price Deflation: In February 2010, Krugman warned of potential price deflation in the near future, comparing the U.S. situation to Japan’s. This did not occur; instead, his preferred measures of CPI turned around sharply within months2.
  6. Oil Prices and Production
  7. Permanent High Oil Prices: In June 2008, with oil at $137 per barrel, Krugman predicted that oil prices were on a permanently higher trajectory. The price of oil collapsed mere months later3.
  8. U.S. Oil Production: Krugman failed to foresee the surge in U.S. crude oil output. He had expressed skepticism about significant increases in oil production, but U.S. field production of crude nearly doubled in the following decade

I’ve never trusted the NYT other than to be on the liberal side of anything, even if it means they were wrong. That he got an award for his economic writings is analogous to Obama getting a Nobel before he did anything other than lie to get elected.

Go away and stop ruining our lives like the rest of the Coastal elites that misunderestimate (Bush-ism) what the real America and real Americans who live in flyover country believe. It’s why most of the country just voted red instead of blue.

Assholes like this need to go away.

NBADJT

Never Bet Against Donald John Trump

Prominent streamer “xQc,” known for high stakes gambling, has faced a significant setback after losing a staggering $700,000 bet on Kamala Harris in the 2024 United States Presidential elections. In a video clip from his stream, xQc can be seen cashing out multiple bets on Harris to win — giving up his wager in exchange for keeping a tiny percentage of the amount bet.

Streamer xQc, who has built a huge audience as a video game streamer and degenerate gambler, recently learned the hard way that it does not pay to bet against Donald Trump.

In a video clip from his stream, he “cashes out” of multiple bets he placed on Kamala Harris to win the election. Cashing out bets can be compared to surrender, giving up any chance of winning in exchange for the return of a small part of the original bet amount.

story

It’s what I tell my friends who talk shit about Trump because some of them can’t handle an alpha male who keeps winning.

‘F*** off’: Tucker Carlson goes nuclear in epic takedown of biased N.Y. Times reporter

Go Tucker, tell the NYT what we all want to tell them.

Tucker Carlson is going nuclear on a New York Times reporter who sought comment about alleged election misinformation by the conservative champion, telling him to “f*** off.”

Carlson shared a text exchange late Monday night from Nico Grant, a San Francisco-based technology correspondent for the newspaper, who indicated: “We rely on an analysis conducted by researchers at Media Matters for America,” a left-wing-minded media watchdog.

Grant said he was working on an article where researchers found 286 videos Carlson posted on YouTube between May and August supposedly containing misinformation, including a clip of Carlson mentioning a “clearly stolen” election.

Grant also sought to know if Carlson was a member of the YouTube Partner Program, and if so, “How often does YouTube demonetize your videos?”

Carlson responded: “So the New York Times is working with a left wing hate group to silence critics of the Democratic Party? Please ask yourself why you’re participating in it. This is why you got into journalism? It’s shameful. I hope you’re filled with guilt and self-loathing for sending me a text like this. Please quote me.”

The reply from the reporter stated: “Thank you for your prompt response. Would you like to address any of the points or questions above?”

Carlson then responded: “Would I like to participate in your attempt to censor me? No thanks. But I do hope you’ll quote what I wrote above and also note that I told you to f*** off, which I am now doing. Thanks.”

More with the actual tweet

The reporter looks like a serious poofter to me

Also, with all that is going on with the Washington Post, LA Times and USA today, credibility in the media has hit rock bottom with most people.

Cut The Crap With Telling Us To Tone It Down – 2 1/2 Minutes Straight of Leftist Politicians and Media Calling for Violence and Unrest

We’ve seen two assassination attempts against Donald Trump, one on Sunday and the other on July 13 which came within millimeters of ending the former president’s life.

We’ve seen the disgusting reaction from much of the nation’s corrupt media and from multiple Democrat politicians implying or outright saying the GOP nominee deserved it because of his inflammatory rhetoric. We’ve seen hateful leftists like Rachel Vindman laugh about it, showing exactly zero humanity and ignoring the fact that, even if she has political differences with the man, in the end, Donald Trump is a human being with a family and has not committed any monstrous murders or other acts that would even remotely rationalize such burning hatred.

Here is the link to the hate speech X post. WordPress won’t let me imbed it so you know it’s bad

HOT TAKES: Left and Liberal Media Shame Themselves Over Second Trump Assassination Attempt

Moore to the Point – ‘He Had It Coming’

Adam Kinzinger, Vindmans, MSNBC Deliver Insane Responses to Second Trump Assassination Attempt

But who in the end is really spewing out the venomous rhetoric, the calls to violence? Sure, Trump is known to be a pugnacious orator and is more than willing to speak his mind, but in the case of the two episodes they get most worked up about – January 6 and Charlottesville—they continually lie about what he actually said. He did not call white supremacists “very fine people,” and he did not call for an insurrection at the Capitol.

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Sayings I Used For My Email Closing At Work

I kept this file hanging around and thought I’d share it, YMMV:

L’esprit de L’escalier – things you wish you could have said after you leave an argument

Talk to a fool and he calls you foolish

“Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength.”

Vous-avez le cerveau d’un d’un sandwich au fromage –you have the brain of a cheese sandwich

“Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.” (Sign hanging in Einstein’s office at Princeton)

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
– Dale Carnegie

Robert Frost – “In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.”

Arrête de ramer, tu attaques la falaise. (you can stop rowing now, you’re on the beach)

It is easy to lose one’s perspective in a mass of details.

Failure is but a paragraph in the book of each human life. It is the pages that follow that ultimately define us

Laurence J. Peter – “An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn’t happen today.”

“Racing is Life.  Everything before and after is just waiting.” Steve McQueen from the movie LeMans

Albert Einstein open original article “Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former

Joseph Heller -“The enemy is anybody who’s going to get you killed,
no matter which side he’s on.”

Sidney J. Harris – “A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future.”

Abba Eban-“History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.”

When you win, say nothing, when you lose, say less. -Paul Brown

You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them. -Michael Jordan

Every game is an opportunity to measure yourself against your own potential. -Bud Wilkinson

Excellence is not a singular act but a habit. You are what you do repeatedly. -Shaquille O’Neal

“Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.” Winston Churchill, as quoted in The New American Newspeak Dictionary (2005) by Adrian Krieg, p. 96

 Rudeness is a weak person’s imitation of strength – Oscar Wilde

“What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.”

Losers quit when they’re tired. Winners quit when they’ve won

370H-SSV-0773H – read upside down

I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race [is] not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.

For man also knoweth not his time: as the fishes that are taken in an evil net, and as the birds that are caught in the snare; so [are] the sons of men snared in an evil time, when it falleth suddenly upon them.

— Ecclesiastes 9:11,12 —

“Meetings are indispensable when you don’t want to do anything.” – John Kenneth Galbraith

If guns kill people, then pens misspell words, cars make people drive drunk, forks make you fat, and TVs make you watch porn.

Listen to people. If they are worth talking to, they are worth listening to first.

You can’t change what happens to you in life. All you can change is how you deal with it.

I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a $hit in days.

Liberalism: Moochers electing looters to steal from producers

Political Correctness – A term used by whiny pussies that need stuff sugar coated

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.” -Albert Einstein

 “I like to see a man proud of the place in which he lives. I like to see a man live so that his place will be proud of him.” Abraham Lincoln

“This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave.” Elmer Davis

“Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, to assure the survival and success of liberty.”  John F. Kennedy

“Sure I wave the American flag. Do you know a better flag to wave? Sure I love my country with all her faults. I’m not ashamed of that, never have been, never will be.”  John Wayne

“We must always remember that America is a great nation today not because of what government did for people but because of what people did for themselves and for one another.” Richard Nixon

“There is no limit to the greatness of America!” George W. Bush

“Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism, but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their country and hate the enemy.” Ann Coulter

“I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country.” Nathan Hale

“Patriotism is not short, frenzied outbursts of emotion, but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.” Adlai E. Stevenson

“One, if you attack my integrity, I will defend myself. If you attack my patriotism, I will defend myself. If you come after my family, I will counter-attack viciously, I will destroy you.” Scott Ritter

“The American patriots of today continue the tradition of the long line of patriots before them, by helping to promote liberty and freedom around the world.” John Linder  

“Patriotism is easy to understand in America. It means looking out for yourself by looking out for your country.” Calvin Coolidge

“This country will not be a good place for any of us to live in unless we make it a good place for all of us to live in.” Theodore Roosevelt

“You cannot spill a drop of American blood without spilling the blood of the whole world…. We are not a nation, so much as a world.” Herman Melville 

A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.

– Ariel Durant

“Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.” – George Eliot

Quote du jour

But isn’t it always that way with liberals? The only time they seem to make any sense at all is when they’re drunk or you are.

–Burt Prelutsky

Ya gotta be tough if your gonna be stupid.

“Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rapidly promoted by mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a piece of shit by the clean end.”

Laurence J. Peteropen original article

“Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.”

“Never judge a book by its movie.”

“Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side.”

“Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.”
— Benjamin Franklin

“Give me four years to teach the children and the seed I have sown will never be uprooted.”
— Vladimir Lenin

“When an opponent declares, ‘I will not come over to your side,’ I calmly say, ‘Your child belongs to us already… What are you? You will pass on. Your descendants, however, now stand in the new camp. In a short time they will know nothing else but this new community.’”
— Adolf Hitler

Never take advice from women about women.

And the last one was when I retired:

If the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me – Jimmy Buffett

Literally, like what is a word you feel that too many people use, it’s amazing? (see what I did there?)

What is a word you feel that too many people use?

Literally

Amazing

Like

Basically

Just

Actually

Really

Obviously

Honestly

Apparently

Kind of

Sort of

In my opinion (IMO)

At the end of the day

To be honest

You know

I mean

Definitely

Absolutely

Bonus, a list of phrases I felt were overused also

Assholes On Parade – Those Who Wanted Trump Killed Took To Social Media

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–

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–

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–

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CNN couldn’t even call it an assassination attempt

–

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Blaming MAGA for this, right

–

–

–

–

–

–

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While not an asshole, Bongino points out the problem at the top, a diversity hire

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Some Dark Lessons In The Area Of Love

· The person who cares less has the most power in a relationship.

· No one will ever be able to make you feel loved unless you love yourself.

· You can’t change others.

· No matter how hot you find someone, you’ll get used to their appearance faster than you like.

· The cute little quirks of today can be the soul-crushing flaws of tomorrow.

· We will all eventually become old and unattractive in the eyes of society.

· Often, the less you care about a particular woman, the easier it is to end up with her.

· Both sexes are easy to manipulate with the same principles that marketers use to sell us crap – scarcity, commitment, reciprocity, authority, social proof, and liking.

· Men will never know how it feels to be a woman and vice versa.

· You can love your partner till death and still want to sleep with others.

· You can’t always get what (who) you want.

· Love, dating, and relationship can’t be “figured out” logically. They require empathy, vulnerability, and honesty.

· Emotions change all the time. It’s possible to think you love someone with all your heart, but then one day you sober up and find out you truly don’t.

· When in love, everyone becomes an idiot.

· “Show me any beautiful woman, and I’ll show you a man who’s tired of sleeping with her.”

· The higher you set the expectations from the beginning, the harder it will be to maintain the relationship. E.g., Send your girlfriend flowers every day and it will be cute for the first three days, cheesy after that, then awkward, and finally unbearable.

· The opposite of well is well-meaning.

Latin For Ungrateful Dickhead


It is from the species Adelotypa annulifera or latin for ungrateful dickhead.

I have no idea if this is right or not. I’m not even going to put it through the Latin translator. It’s because my level of humor lets me get the joke that there really could be a Latin name, especially because I know so many in this species.

Actually, this came from some old writings of mine and I was talking about one of my wife’s relatives. I have many that are in this species. It’s why I avoid family stuff as much as I can.

The Top 20 Lies of the 2020s

Lying is an epidemic even worse than COVID.

Our president and his press secretaries seem to lie with every word they say and deny facts that anyone with a pair of eyes can see for himself.

Scientists and doctors, formerly among the most trusted members of our society, lie to foster popular environmental theories and get government grants, or to promote Big Pharma and deter people from effective treatments.

Our news media no longer report the news; they shape the news as instructed.

Here is just a sample of commonly promoted lies starting in 2020.

Covid has a 4% death rate.

Masks will keep us safe from COVID.

COVID vaccines are safe and effective.

Oil and natural gas are going to destroy the planet.

Electric cars are going to save the environment.

Electric cars are safe.

Our justice system is fair for all.

Hunter Biden’s laptop was Russian disinformation.

Trump stole classified documents.

Boys should compete in girls’ sports.

Men can have babies.

Search engines give honest results.

Protecting Ukraine’s borders is in the interest of the United States.

Our borders are safe and secure.

Israel is guilty of war crimes.

Inflation is under control.

The 2020 Election was the safest and most secure in history.

More lies found here

Romance Is Like Alcohol

Romance is like alcohol. It invents emotions out of thin air. It can create a mirage of love; it can intoxicate us with an imagined happiness. It can generate anger and jealousy where none is deserved. It can bestow sadness and heartbreak when nothing is lost.

Romance is like alcohol. It feels really fucking good. Most of the time. But there’s usually a price to pay as soon as you sober up.

Romance is like alcohol in that it captivates us when we’re young. It intoxicates us and convinces us that what we’re experiencing is the only thing that is real, the only thing that matters. As we grow older and gain more experience, we learn to trust this feeling less and less, to understand that it comes and goes like anything else.

Romance is like alcohol — it can become an addiction, consuming us, destroying lives and ruining relationships with those closest to us. Some people can’t seem to get enough of it. They seek it out in the most unacceptable of places — their friend’s spouse, a young impressionable co-worker, or an ex that they can’t quite seem to let go of. They will lie, cheat, steal, and hurt others just to get one more fix of it, yet their behavior will always appear justified in their own mind. Well not me.

I don’t know who to attribute this to, but will if anyone knows.

Assholes On Parade – The 20 Most INSANE Quotes From Hollywood’s Elite

Tonight is Hollywood’s biggest night, the 96th Academy Awards, when the liberal bubble of the movie industry puts on a TV show expecting the rest of the nation to pay rapt attention. So it’s a good time to dig out the absolute worst quotes we’ve collected over the years from the “stars,” as they championed their favorite liberal politicians and badmouthed conservatives.

Here they are

It’s why you should do the opposite of whatever they say

What Is The List Of The Great Lies (Used To Be What Are The 3 Big Lies, Now There Are More)?

I was going to make this a sarcastic post so I wanted to remember them as I heard it decades ago. It turned out a lot differently than I thought when I asked the AI bots.

Here’s where I started:

  • Trust me
  • The check is in the mail
  • I love you

So after I did a search, I found these listed by others. If I missed any, leave it in the comments and I’ll include it and give you credit.

  • I’m from the government and I’m here to help you
  • I won’t cum in your mouth
  • I’ll respect you in the morning
  • Read my lips, no new taxes
  • I did not have sexual relations with that woman
  • If you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor
  • If you like your plan, you can keep your plan
  • Black is beautiful
  • Climate change is true
  • The moon landing is fake
  • The Covid Vaccine works
  • The 2020 Election was not rigged or stolen – Mosckerr
  • This will only hurt a little while
  • This will hurt me more than it hurts you
  • It’s not you, it’s me (it’s you)
  • I can quit anytime I want to
  • You are the best I’ve ever had
  • I love the gift
  • That dress doesn’t make you look fat
  • I’ll return it/repay it right away
  • “Honey, that has never happened to me before.”
  • “I’m breaking up with you, but I still want us to be friends.”
  • “Men are simple creatures.”
  • “It’s only a cold sore.”
  • “I’m from the IRS and I’m here to help you.”
  • “I’ll only stick the head of it in.”
  • I would never lie to you.
  • Of course size doesn’t matter.
  • I’m just happy to be here and help out the team any way I can.
  • I love my job
  • I only had two drinks at the bar.
  • I had no idea that I was speeding.
  • No mom, we haven’t had sex. We’re waiting until we get married.
  • I’ve only had a couple before you
  • “It isn’t about the money, it’s the principle of the thing.”
  • “It was like that when I bought it.”
  • “That’s a great idea, boss.”
  • “I only use my internet connection at work for business purposes.”
  • “Don’t worry, my parents really like you.”
  • It doesn’t matter to me, you’re sexy no matter how much you weigh. Now go to sleep, I have to work tomorrow.
  • I have a headache
  • Of course I came
  • You make me cum every time
  • I’ll call you…definitely!
  • The cable man will be there between 9 to noon.
  • The taxi will be there in less than 30 minutes.
  • The bus comes every half hour.
  • “No dear, she’s not prettier than you…”
  • Of course I’m 21, I just left my ID in the car.
  • Of course I’ve done this before, I’ll be done in five minutes.
  • My phone must have died
  • It was in my spam folder
  • It’s great to see you
  • I can have only one more
  • “I don’t care about looks as much as personality.”
  • That was my last one
  • I’m fine
  • That looks great on you

Rudyard Kipling On Being A Man

“If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, or, being lied about, refuse to deal in lies;

Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating. . .

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue . . . then you’ll be a man, my son.”

That Didn’t Age Well – Biden Attacks Yemen After Saying Trump Didn’t Have Authority to Do The Same In 2020

Thursday Saying – Yes, And We Were Supposed To Have Flying Cars By Now Also

“If you want to know how dumb the West has become, people have been arguing about how many genders there are, and if it’s FAIR to allow males to compete against females in competitive sports… For 8 YEARS! No wonder no real progress is being made on anything important.” — Zuby

A Truth About People At Christmas

This much attention is overwhelming for an introvert. i can’t wait for it to be over. I can’t hear another Christmas song on the speaker anywhere.

What I hate the most is how people change and act different when I know damn well what asswipes they are the rest of the year. I hate their fake attitude because it’s the Christmas spirit, or whatever lie they are telling.

I like the meaning of Christmas, but the crap that people do around it, compounded by the commercialization since September and I want to pull my hair out.

This is true every year. I can’t wait for it to be over so we can go back to being who we really are.

Euphemisms for Stupid

This is the first update in a while, but it was well worth it.  If I missed one, please comment and I’ll include it.

If one of these offends you, take the complaints elsewhere, I’m the one that got dissed here.

A beer short of a six pack
A brick short of a load
A couple of eggs shy of a dozen
A couple of gallons short of a full tank
A few ants short of a picnic
A few beers short of a six-pack
A few bricks short of a pile
A few bricks short of a wall
A few cards short of a deck
A few clowns short of a circus.
A few feathers short of a whole duck
A few fries short of a Happy Meal
A few peas short of a casserole
A few tomatoes short of a good thick sauce

A few soldier short of a squad
A few trucks short of a convoy
A fortune cookie short of a Chinese dinner
A pepperoni short of a pizza
A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on
A sandwich short of a picnic
A train short of a full service?
About as bright as a burnt out 20 watt light bulb.
About as useful as a chocolate fireguard
Ah say, that boy reminds me of Paul Revere’s ride; a little light in the
belfry
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity
An intellect rivalled only by garden tools
As much use as a hedgehog in a condom factory
As much use as an ashtray on a motorcycle
As quick as a tortoise on Prozac
As smart as bait

As smart as Joe Biden
As useful as a screen door on a submarine
As useful as a wooden frying pan
As useful as tits on a bull
Body by God, Mind by Mattel.
Bright as Alaska in December
Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel

Could screw up a one car funeral
Doesn’t have both oars in the water
Doesn’t have all his corn flakes in one box
Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash
Doesn’t have all the dots on his dice
Donated his body to science before he was done using it
Dumb as a corn cob.
Dumb as a stump.
Dumber than a bag of hammers.
Dumber than a bag of rocks

Dumber than a lobotomized rock

Elevator don’t quiet make the top floor
Fell out of the family tree
Forgot to pay his brain bill
Goes surfing in Nebraska
Golf bag doesn’t have a full set of irons
Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together
Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn’t watching
Gross ignoramus — 144 times worse than a normal ignoramus
Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt

This is the one —> Has delusions of adequacy.

Has two brains, one’s lost and the other is out looking for it
Having an intelligence rivalled only by garden tools.
He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down
He had a little too much chlorine in his gene pool.
He is so dumb, he would look for a wishbone in a soft-boiled egg.
He is so dumb, the only thing he ever read was an eye-chart.
He played too much without a helmet
He’s got a mind like a steel trap, rusted shut
He’s got a leak in his think-tank
He’s got a mind like a steel sieve
He’s got his feet firmly planted 3 feet above the ground
He’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer
He’s so dense light bends around him
He’s so dumb he couldn’t pour the water out of a boot if the instructions
were on the heel
His belt doesn’t go through all the loops
His cheese has slipped off his cracker

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork
His porch light ain’t on
I say, that boy is about as sharp as a sack of wet mice
If brains were chocolate – he wouldn’t have enough to fill an M&M
If brains were dynamite – he wouldn’t have enough to blow his nose
If brains were dynamite, he wouldn’t have enough to blow his hat off
If brains were gasoline, he couldn’t ride a moped around a fruit loop
If brains were taxed, he’d get a rebate
If he had a brain, he’d be dangerous
If he had another brain, it would be lonely
If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week
If stupid were a talent, he would be considered gifted

If stupid could fly, you’d be a jet.
If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change back
If you stand close enough to him you can hear the ocean
Isn’t firing on all 6 cylinders
Isn’t firing on all thrusters
Its hard to believe that he beat out half a billion other sperm

If I wanted to kill myself I’d climb your ego and jump to your IQ
Kangaroo loose in the top paddock
Like a pair of children’s scissors, bright and colorful, but not too sharp
Million dollar body and a 2 dollar engine.
Mind is in neutral, body is in gear
Mind like a rubber bear trap.
Needing a few screws tightened
Not firing with all spark plugs
Not the brightest light in the harbor
Not the brightest light on the Christmas tree
Not the sharpest hook in the tackle box.
Not the sharpest pencil in the box
Off his rocker
On/off switch is broken in the off position
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl
One neuron short of a synapse
One taco short of a combination plate
One turbine short of an airplane
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests
Prime candidate for natural deselection
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
Requires directions to lay sod
Room temperature IQ
Running about a quart low
Running on empty
Sets the lowest possible goals, and consistently fails to achieve them.
Sharp as a bowling ball.
She is so dumb, she couldn’t tell which way an elevator was going if she
had two guesses.
She is so dumb, when I asked her to pass the plate, she said: “Upper or
lower?”
She’s not tied too tight to the pier
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled
Strong like bear, smart like tractor.
Takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch 60 minutes
The elevator is stuck between floors.
The lights are flashing, the gate is down, but the train isn’t coming
The lights are on, but nobody is home.
The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead
Too dumb to pull his head in before he shuts the window
Too many yards between the goal posts
Two hub caps short of a Buick.
Warning – Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear
Was left on the tilt-a-whirl too long as a baby
Would be out of her depth in a mud puddle.
Your the flower of my life (you blooming idiot)
You can’t call him an idiot, you’ll insult all the idiots in the world.

Your mouth is writing checks that your intellect cannot cash

“I’m not saying you’re the dumbest person in the world—but you better hope the dumbest person in the world doesn’t die.”

Surely your parents only met once. Money was involved; no more than a twenty. And they say she was dressed as a boy at the time.

One of my favorite Far Side Cartoon’s ever

Midvale School for the Gifted: Today's Government | Trade the Tape

Phrases You Don’t Say Anymore

“Roll down the window.” Cars have had automatic windows for ages, making the manual rolling down of windows a thing of the past. I still say this, though, in my 1964 Mustang.

“Check the answering machine.” Voicemail on cellphones has obliterated the need for a physical answering machine. I think it’s super interesting Apple’s iOS 17 lets you listen while someone leaves a voicemail so you can decide to pick up. New? Hardly.

“Dial 411.” My mother designed the 411 directory system for Bell Labs. Now, just look someone up online and you have their digits.

“Beep me.” Pagers were all the rage once upon a time. Today, they’re used almost exclusively in healthcare or other specific industries.

“I’ll tape it.” You no longer “tape” shows with DVR and streaming services. You just hit “Record” on your device or catch it later on demand.

“Rewind” or “Fast-forward.” These phrases made perfect sense for cassettes and VHS tapes, and, yes, we still use them metaphorically, but you’re not actually winding anything.

“I need to find a payphone.” My dad used to make me carry a quarter just in case I needed to make a call. With a cellphone in nearly everyone’s pocket, payphones have become an urban relic.

“Get the film developed” or “Don’t waste the film.” Oh, the good old days of waiting to see a picture you looked horrible in. Digital cameras and smartphones have done away with this.

“Look it up in the White (or Yellow) Pages.” Online directories have replaced those hefty books.

“I’ll fax it to you.” Fax machines are just about dead. Warren Buffett once told me that’s the only way he’ll do contracts. Why? No one can hack a fax machine, unlike email.

Hat tip Kim Komando

Lord Chesterfield Quotes – What’s Inside Of A Man

In order to judge of the inside of others, study your own; for men in general are very much alike, and though one has one prevailing passion, and another has another, yet their operations are much the same; and whatever engages or disgusts, pleases, or offends you in others will engage, disgust, please or offend others in you.”

And this one for introverts

“Silence and reserve suggest latent power. What some men think has more effect than what others say.”

Advice From Lord Chesterfield – On Knowledge

“Knowledge is a comfortable and necessary retreat and shelter for us in advanced age, and if we do not plant it while young, it will give us no shade when we grow old.”

“A weak mind is like a microscope, which magnifies trifling things, but cannot receive great ones.”

Trump On The LIV/PGA Golf Kerfuffle, Called It

He called this one. Once a businessman, always a businessman. The LIV golfers made a ton of money while working a lot less for the last couple of years. The PGA golfers lost out on hundreds of millions of dollars.

The PGA Tour announced Tuesday that it is merging with Saudi-backed LIV Golf in a shocking development intended to end the rivals’ public hostilities and extensive ongoing litigation.

The parties agreed to combine their commercial businesses and rights into a new entity, the name of which has not yet been released. LIV Golf Investments, the firm spearheading the LIV tour, is supported by the Saudi regime’s sovereign wealth fund.

Over the last year, LIV and the PGA have been entangled in multiple antitrust lawsuits, which will reportedly be quashed as part of the agreement. Golfers and fans who remain loyal to the PGA have attacked LIV as a so-called “sports-washing” vehicle for the Saudi regime to distract from its extensive record of human-rights abuses.

“After two years of disruption and distraction, this is a historic day for the game we all know and love,” PGA Tour Commissioner Jay Monahan said in a statement. “This transformational partnership recognizes the immeasurable strength of the PGA TOUR’s history, legacy and pro-competitive model and combines with it the DP World Tour and LIV – including the team golf concept – to create an organization that will benefit golf’s players, commercial and charitable partners and fans.”

Advice From Lord Chesterfield

“Knowledge is a comfortable and necessary retreat and shelter for us in advanced age, and if we do not plant it while young, it will give us no shade when we grow old.”

And this

“Wear your learning, like your watch, in a private pocket. Do not pull it out merely to show that you have one. If asked what o’clock it is, tell it; but do not proclaim it hourly and unasked, like the watchman”

High IQ Humor – Chess Style

It’s like the movie War Games. The media is the enemy this time. The emerging pattern is that they’ve started (and lost) almost all of the wars recently. This war is against the middle class, the everyday Joe six-pack and flyover country.

The high IQ part of this is to ignore them and pay attention to the facts.

May The Fourth Be With…Well, Not Everyone

I think they can’t see or there is some defect in the clones. Storm Troopers went from deadly, murderous villains doing the work of the evil Lord Vader, to the 3 stooges who couldn’t hit Han Solo or Luke in a hallway a few feet wide in the prison cell.

It went downhill from there.

Election Time Meme’s, Climate Lies, The Media And On, And On….

How much government waste?

In Global Warming lies:

Burying the blades of wind turbines because they can not be recycled. Very Earth friendly move by the climate crowd. They don’t tell you this part of the lie.

The Media

“Every human has four endowments—self awareness, conscience, independent will, and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom … The power to choose, to respond, to change.”

– Stephen Covey

And Finally, we are right:

Conspiracy Theorists About Covid, The Election, The Jab, Ivermectin, The FBI, The DOJ, WEF, And On, And On………

It’s been going on for a while, but the conspiracy theorists have been right since about 2015.

Then came Covid and they used every childish behavior possible to shame us or in some cases force some into the jab.

Those of us who saw what was going on were never fooled, only biding our time.

You’d better start listening to what they have to say, before those in the title get their way. As Ironman said to Captain America…

YOU’RE NOT WRONG

from Woosterman

Proof that the CDC is deliberately ignoring the safety signals from the COVID vax

FOIA Uncovers ATF and Legacy Media Working Together (thanks Wirecutter for this)

And of course, the UN is on top of the current lies with “We own the science” You own the conspiracy, the Science stands on it’s own.

It’s endless. I could add to this all day and never be done.

Welfare Explained By Booker T Washington

It’s the left, the squad, Soros, Schwab and their ilk who want people to be dependent. Look to the current leadership and ask if they are helping or hurting our country and it’s various people.

Hanlon’s Razor (Not Occum’s)

Hanlon’s Razor: “Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity.”

Why You Are Stupid To Argue On The Internet

It’s like Internet Road Rage.

That is intuitive for some, but there are new users each day. We also are in the election cycle, so max out the stupid button with this next round of fun in the web universe.

Now That I’m Grown, What Did I Get For What I Wished For?

I’ve been reminiscing about when I was young. I’d flit from one thing to the next, never worrying about what was around the next corner. I didn’t plan for tomorrow unless it included fun or something for me to do that wouldn’t affect my retirement.

Now, I can’t take a dump without working out what I’m going to do next and plan my time around it.

My kids are grown now, but I told them to not grow up too fast. They all have mortgages, plus pets and kids that rely on them, like they did on me.

I hurt a lot more now. I’m sore from my first round of golf of the year yesterday, and I didn’t even go at it that hard.

Life.

How Wokeness Ruins Everything It Touches

I’m glad he joined the war against woke. I hope that dies like Disco, both useless and neither helped us be better.

Now That Most Of The Stimulus Checks Have Been Cut, The Bill Has Come Due

Since 2010, our government has “given free money” to people. Yes, billions were siphoned off the top to people that don’t need it and were just dipping their hands in the till. There are plenty of cases documented. In the court of law, it’s called money laundering.

COVID Relief Program is the ‘Biggest Fraud in a Generation’

We’ve known about the fraud associated with the COVID relief program known as the Paycheck Protection Program (PPP):

Many who participated in what prosecutors are calling the largest fraud in U.S. history — the theft of hundreds of billions of dollars in taxpayer money intended to help those harmed by the coronavirus pandemic — couldn’t resist purchasing luxury automobiles. Also mansions, private jet flights and swanky vacations.

They came into their riches by participating in what experts say is the theft of as much as $80 billion — or about 10 percent — of the $800 billion handed out in a Covid relief plan known as the Paycheck Protection Program, or PPP. That’s on top of the $90 billion to $400 billion believed to have been stolen from the $900 billion Covid unemployment relief program — at least half taken by international fraudsters — as NBC News reported last year. And another $80 billion potentially pilfered from a separate Covid disaster relief program.

COVID Relief Program is the ‘Biggest Fraud in a Generation’

Like hitchhiking; it’s ass, grass or cash, no one rides for free. The bill is now due and it’s being paid at the grocery store and the gas pump. I’ll give it to you that the gas pump prices don’t have to happen, but the current administration is just giving us pain. It was half the price a year and a half ago and the ability to take it back to that prices is available still, if they wanted to do it.

A New Level In Lying – Dictatorships

I think it is a push to socialism. Still, it’s hard to believe they are trying this, and even harder to believe that people are buying it.

Steven King On Putin, Trump and Biden

Well, this tweet didn’t age well did it? This is 180 degrees wrong in less than 12 hours.

Stick to writing fiction. There is a real world out there.

Really, this is like Thomas Friedman saying the stock market would collapse when Trump was elected. These guys are so deluded by ideology that they can’t live in a factual world.

Putin knew he was free to make move when Biden collapsed in Afghanistan. There is no telling what Xi is planning, but it is safe to say that it doesn’t look good for Taiwan right now.

The reality is that Putin didn’t do anything when Trump was the Commander in Chief. He knew there would be strategic consequences, not political maneuvering.

Posting Stupid Stuff On Facebook

Same thing for Alcohol. When I see a girl post herself holding a drink, like all guys learned when they are growing up, it’s a leg spreader.

If I guy is posting at drink, I think here, hold my beer because something stupid is happening soon.

On Government Silencing The Opposition

Once a government is committed to the principle of silencing the voice of opposition, it has only one way to go, and that is down the path of increasingly repressive measures, until it becomes a source of terror to all its citizens and creates a country where everyone lives in fear. - Harry S. Truman

Exercise your first amendment.

This is what the MSM/current government/SJW/Woke/PC/climate change people/Fake book/Twitter/Youtube/Google and the left are doing. If you aren’t worried about your truth being challenged, you don’t have to silence anyone. If the facts don’t support your spew, see Harry’s quote.

It seems that you can’t say anything without offending someone. If you read my blog, it’s there waiting for you somewhere. It’s not going to stop me. Look down a post or two about John not giving a fuck.

On a hat tip from Moonbattery.

Introvert Stuff – Blaise Pascal On Being Alone

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone,” Blaise Pascal wrote in the 17th century.

I like others and have socialized for many decades, but given the choice I’d rather be alone.

I watch people who don’t know what to do with themselves if they are alone. Now, a lot of people don’t know what to do with themselves without a phone.

Instead of looking at it as withdrawing from others, I view it as learning to enjoy the time alone and discover the real me.

Writing has been invaluable to me. I write here, but my diaries are hundreds of thousands of words that are how I find out who I am and how to cope with the day to day issues. It helps me put my thoughts together before I have to face people because most can out talk me before I can put my thoughts together cogently.

Once you have mastered the ability to be alone, you have freed yourself from the bonds of others to live life on your own terms.

George Floyd vs MLK

idiot

From Moonbattery

Biden effectively said that a career criminal who died of a fentanyl overdose while resisting arrest dwarfs the most iconic figure in the civil rights movement, presumably because Floyd’s death was exploited as a pretext for hundreds of riots, $billions in property damage, and the War on Police that caused the ongoing explosion of violent crime.

But Democrats voted for Biden anyway. The rest is unfolding history.

Actually, from the Democrat viewpoint, Biden is right. Floyd is the more important figure. According to our state religion under Democrat rule (i.e., critical race theory), focusing on content of character instead of color of skin is racist. George Floyd is the role model they have in mind for blacks, not MLK.

Let’s look at who Floyd really is.

Star Parker, African American thought leader puts it better than I can:

On Aug. 28, 1963, King delivered one of the great speeches in American history, popularly known as the “I Have a Dream” speech. It is a speech that must be dusted off and studied anew today, because it contains the very message that our nation sorely needs to hear and digest now.

It’s a message that has been tragically lost and buried and replaced with great and destructive distortions.

Two things jump out when reading through that speech: One is how this black preacher captured in his words that day the heart and soul of America. Second, how King’s great message that day stands in total contrast to the rhetoric peddled by today’s progressives as the remedy to our racial strife.

The indictment of the woke movement is that America is the problem. King offered up America as the solution. He talked about the “magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence.”

“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.’”

The problem, as King explained, is not America or the eternal truths that were brought to bear in its founding. The problem was the failure of the nation to live up to the challenges of its great founding principles.

That was the heart of King’s message that day. He appealed to the nation to realize the dream of its Founding Fathers, not to crush it and bury it, as we hear today.

The problem is not white people. “The marvelous new militancy … must not lead us to a distrust of all white people,” he said. And, of course, the most memorable and oft-quoted line of the speech, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”

What has happened instead? Where has this great message of King gotten lost? In the name of racial justice, our race campaigns today are defined by selection and placement based on race, based on the color of skin, and not based on the content of character, as King implored the nation to do.

more….

The Truth About Old People

You also don’t give a shit so you say what needs saying. I stopped caring whether people liked me a long time ago. If they don’t, it’s one less person to have to worry about. I can do it while being polite too, so it’s not an asshole thing.

Not caring what people think, another of my super powers.

Red Pill Or Blue Pill On Vax Passports?

Cut the shit. The passports are just the next level of control of the masses. All through history, there have been those who try to be the ruling class.

Look at Cuba, North Korea and China to know that we don’t want that.

Take the red pill, I always have.

Eric Clapton On What Happened to Rock N Roll

“Rock and roll got watered down a long time ago.” He said it used to be about being a rebel. “And now it’s much more to do with conformity,”

It’s why the music was so much better in the 70’s.

Not Clapton, but definitely Rock and Roll.

Sayings By Socrates – On Smart and Stupid People

It’s why I don’t bother even continuing the conversation with some people who want to challenge me just to prove they are right.

It just gives me another reason not to talk to people if I don’t have to. I love talking to the smart ones about deep topics, but there aren’t that many around.

The New Paging Mike Hunt

At one job, one of the tech support guys spoofed the receptionist and she paged Mike Hunt across the entire warehouse. It was funny. All the guys got it, but only some of the girls.

It was childish, but it broke up the day. It also was very funny to me.

#LGB #FJB

Sunday Sayings

I’ve written these down on Sunday’s, obviously from portions of sermons, but they have a lot to do with a meaningful life.

Don’t be rich in the world and poor towards God.

It is only by thinking clearly about the future that you will live wisely in the present.

You are not defined by your sin when forgiven.

God’s purposes doesn’t depend on our preferences.

Worry – placing faith in the worst outcome.

Finding a solution is different than solving the problem.

Some gifts are valuable because of the good they can do in the world. Others are valuable for the statement they make about the heart of the giver and worth of God for whom they are given.

Sometimes you miss the most obvious things because your heart isn’t tuned to it.

Thinking about Jesus doesn’t mean you know him or the bible.

If you look for Jesus he will show himself to you and give you life, peace and hope.

On Turning The Clocks Back Soon

I’m smart enough to never have listened to a song by her (that I’m aware of). The drugs affected John and her by then and there wasn’t much to listen to. He was better with the Beatles. She was never good.

It doesn’t affect me as much anymore because my age gets me up whenever it feels like it. I (for the most part) don’t have to get up for anything. I agreed with my golfing partner not to get up too early for a tee time next round. Not being rushed is a great thing at this point in life.

I don’t miss early meetings, e-mail road rage or having to get the kids ready for school. That is for young people.

Here is a guide on how to set each of your devices for DST. You’ve been warned if you click on it. You’ll get another dose of sarcasm.

It’s Not Friday, Three horrible Facts, And a Silver Lining

Three Horrible Facts 1 Today Is Not Friday 2 Tomorrow Is ...

But, I’m retired so everyday is Saturday for me. I don’t have deadlines or conference calls or personnel issues today. Man I don’t miss work.

I don’t miss Facebook that went down yesterday. I didn’t even know it until I read about it. I’m glad to have that ball and chain out of my life also.

I have a brother-in-Law who is retired not by choice, but defined his life by his job. He doesn’t know what to do. I feel sorry for him. Life is much greater than your job.

For now, I’ll pet my dog and enjoy what comes next.

Just Because The Media Or Government Says Something Doesn’t Make It True

Everyone has heard if you tell a lie often enough, people will believe it.

I grow weary of the obfuscation that comes from Washington these days. When there is someone offended or spouting off, I look behind the scenes now to wonder what are they are going to do to us this time, or what are they hiding that they don’t want us to see?

Trying to get the actual news from the MSM ended a long time ago. How do they call themselves the news with what is being said on TV/Radio/Social Media/other. It is embarrassing that they can blatantly lie on camera or under oath. An event happens and it either is not covered, or is embarrassingly propaganda-ish.

I see things like the crisis that is building on the border, the debt, the emboldening of unfriendly countries to act out in aggression. I know that it is happening and why. Being told that it is climate, Covid or race related, or someone is being a victim or that everyone is not equal. This grows old. It is a cover for putting in an agenda that isn’t the main story.

They are covering for Covid, the Afghanistan debacle, the Border crisis and the 3.5 trillion dollar infrastruction/Socialism bill. There will be something they talk about to distract attention away from what they are doing.

Things are what they are. People know that dogs have 4 legs. I wonder when they have had enough if they just surrender and try to ignore things or say what is really happening. Of course to do that you will be a *-ist, fill in the blank for who you offended this time. Best guess says you are racist right now.

Take that censors.

Some Good News – Matt Amodio Ties James Holzhauer for 2nd Most Wins of All Time on Jeopardy

Matt Amodio Becomes Third Jeopardy! Player to Win $1M in ...

Almost everyone watches or has watched Jeopardy. I have for decades. It is the greatest game show ever. It is also one of the few that the Celebtards haven’t ruined yet because it doesn’t have anything to do with SJW and PC crap. I challenges your mind and memory. I love anything intellectually stimulating.

People play against the contestants from their living rooms. It happens without trying. You want to know how smart you are. There are a lot of strategies and when you think you know them, someone comes up with a new one, like James Holzhauer. I regularly beat the players, but I’m also good on the practice range in golf.

Every once in a while, someone goes on a run. Ken Jennings did 74 games in a row in the 2000’s. A couple of years ago, Holzhauer ran off 32 games and the top money scores of all times except for Jennings. He was about to overtake Ken in less than half the games due to his aggressive betting and incredible knowledge. He was a breath of fresh air. He turned the game upside down by going for the big money clues first, hunting for the Double Jeopardy clues and a willingness to risk a lot.

Last night, Matt Amodio, Ph.D student from Connecticut tied Holzhauer at 32 games in a row and is over a million dollars in winnings, the 3rd most (not counting tournaments of champions, Brad Rutter holds that record).

Tonight, October 1st, Matt could go into 2nd all time for games won. Nothing against James, but I want to see him keep winning.

Everyone loves a streak. In the movie Bull Durham, Kevin Costner told meat “a player on a streak has to respect the streak”. It becomes almost superstitious in baseball and I wonder how it will go for Matt.

It makes for great entertainment. It is the main reason we turn to sports or shows. Back to celebtards and sportstards, they ruin things like the NFL, NBA, WNBA, MBA and most movies and shows with PC crap.

The Jeopardy streak is about intellect, strategy and a little luck.

What is great about Matt is that he is a nice guy. He is respectful to the players past and present and keeps winning. He never says stupid things like “let’s make it a true daily double”. Instead, he bets everything in the Jeopardy round by saying his earnings. His knowledge and intellect is impressive.

He also says What’s (the question) instead of who when it is a person. I like that he has his own style. He has a great poker face on Final Jeopardy and you never know if he’s answered it correctly until it’s revealed. He currently is over 92% right on Final Jeopardy.

The reason I never could be on is that I am only about 30% on Final Jeopardy.

His betting has become aggressive like Holzhauer. I love big bets. It makes the game far more exciting. It separates champions from players or one or two day wonders.

The only regret I have is that Alex Trebeck isn’t there to share it. He made the game what it is.

Trebeck noted the different things about players and that champions are far more willing to bet big.

Sooner or later the streak will be over. It has been a great run. It usually happens when the champion misses a big bet and someone else gets lucky. That victor rarely lasts more than a couple of days. That is the luck part of the show. It’s usually bad luck that ends a streak.

BIG PHARMA and Government, The Real Reason People Are Dying From Covid?

There is an unbelievable push to get people vaxxed. There is an equal effort to stop the cure and prevent people from being healed. Why is this?

HURTING THE CURE

This week, the HHS restricted mono-clonal doses to “Red States like Florida and Texas”.

The governor said he was surprised at the HHS “abrupt and sudden” announcement that it would be taking control of distribution. He said this took him by surprise because a week prior, on Sept. 9, the Biden administration said they were increasing monoclonal antibody distribution by 50 percent.

Now the HHS, as of Monday, “seized control” of the treatments, the governor said, adding that earlier in the week he received “official word” that Florida’s shipments of the monoclonals would be reduced by 50 percent.

Before, providers and infusion centers, as well as the state of Florida, would simply call Amerisource, a third-party affiliate of Regeneron that makes the monoclonal antibodies treatment, and request whatever amount was needed. Now, DeSantis said this new method will make it “doubly difficult” for hospitals and other providers because they will now have to go through the state to get their treatments.

“They sprung this on us,” DeSantis said at the press conference on Thursday. “They pulled the rug out from under us.”

It is surprising when the hospital Covid cases have been reduced by 50 percent because of this.

He said the results of the monoclonal antibodies are positive and that there have been 24 consecutive days in the decline of the COVID hospital census statewide.

The governor said he is pleased with the trends that are occurring and credits the vaccine and the monoclonals for the reduction in hospitalization rates. Florida hospital admission rates have decreased by 50 percent.

And this: States are having big success with monoclonal treatments, so the Biden administration is rationing it.

Ivermectin Works

There is of course Ivermectin, which in medical studies has been proven to work, but they won’t approve that either, rather they trash it as a cure as well as people being healed.

Meta-analyses based on 18 randomized controlled treatment trials of ivermectin in COVID-19 have found large, statistically significant reductions in mortality, time to clinical recovery, and time to viral clearance. Furthermore, results from numerous controlled prophylaxis trials report significantly reduced risks of contracting COVID-19 with the regular use of ivermectin. Finally, the many examples of ivermectin distribution campaigns leading to rapid population-wide decreases in morbidity and mortality indicate that an oral agent effective in all phases of COVID-19 has been identified.

Yet Celebtards like Jimmy Kimmel trash Ivermectin users and it’s treatment. Fortunately, a Dr has responded with facts about it rebuking him from carrying the water for Big Pharma.

During your show on 8 September 2021, you commented on the shortage of ICU beds, saying “Vaccinated person having a heart attack? Yes, come right on in, we’ll take care of you. Unvaccinated guy who gobbled horse goo? Rest in peace, wheezy.” I take issue with your commentary for three primary reasons: 1) the comments appear to be racially discriminatory, 2) the comments are not founded in science and serve to further divide a country that, unfortunately, is taking medical advice from too many non-physicians, and 3) the suggestion that doctors should selectively treat patients is unethical.

THE VAXX IS A DEATH SHOT

THE “VACCINE” KILLS 70 PEOPLE A DAY NOW

The Vaccine Adverse Events Reporting System (VAERS) is exploding with vaccine injuries, at a rate never seen before. The number of injuries and deaths from these vaccines is so immense, all prior vaccine injury data over the past two decades pales in comparison to the carnage observed in 2021.

The government’s passive vaccine injury surveillance system has logged over 675,000 adverse reactions from the vaccines in just eight short months. If these medical issues were divvied up among the roughly 17,000 hospitals in the United States, there have been roughly 40 COVID vaccine injuries for every hospital in the nation.

Over the past forty-seven days of reporting, there have also been 3,296 deaths reported to VAERS. This is equivalent to SEVENTY deaths per day — a sacrificial routine of medical malpractice and wrongful death that must be stopped.

THE VACCINATED CAUSE THE BREAKTHROUGH AND HIGHEST COVID CASES

Singapore has just reached a level of vaccination penetration that many other developed economies would envy: 80% of its adult population has been vaccinated. And yet, it continues to struggle with one of the worst outbreaks yet. On Sunday, the nation of 5.7 million people reported 555 new local COVID-19 cases, the most since August 2020. One day prior, Singapore recorded its 58th COVID death, a partially vaccinated 80-year-old man with a history of diabetes, hypertension and heart problems.

A curious thing has happened since Singapore hit 80%, Cook reminds us: “The community cases have actually gone up since reaching 80 per cent coverage, in part because we’re allowing more social events for those who are vaccinated and, I dare say, more fatigue at the control measures,” Cook told the ABC.

And the outlook isn’t exactly positive: Gan Kim Yong, co-chair of the multi-ministry task force, said the “worrying” spike in infections would “probably get to 2,000 new cases a day,” describing the next two to four weeks as “crucial.”

It’s a lesson that’s not unique to Singapore; “One main lesson from across South-East Asia is that it is incredibly hard to prevent Delta’s spread and, as Singapore shows, even high vaccination rates will not help that much,” Cook added.

Of course there are the other 2 countries, Israel and the UK that have the same high level of break through Covid cases.

An inconvenient fact is being suppressed. In countries like the United Kingdom or Israel where the double- and triple-vaxxed are dominant, they are seeing spikes in hospitalizations. This directly and unambiguously debunks claims that the vaccines are working, yet cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias have the pro-vaxxers performing mental gymnastics to explain it all away.

Another series of inconvenient facts exist in VAERS data. People are definitely dying from the vaccines. There are far too many reports to conclude that they’re all just lies or misunderstandings. Moreover, it has been demonstrated that only 1%-10% of actual adverse reactions to the vaccines are reported to VAERS, which means the total dead is almost certainly much higher than what anyone is saying.

Gibraltar has a 99% Vaxx rate:

MONEY

Well, isn’t that always the reason? Isn’t that the lesson from Watergate, follow the money?

Big Pharma gets paid for every “free” vaccination by Government. Government gets lobbying money from Big Pharma to have them push their products. One hand washes the other. In real life, it’s called laundering and crime.

The Government is pushing everyone to get vaxxed, knowing that it is causing the variants and killing people. The long term effects are not known, but it is not good.

But the failure of the mRNA vaccine is far more serious than the failure to protect. The vaccine itself (1) causes illnesses and deaths identical to Covid illnesses and deaths as the massive number of deaths and health injuries in the adverse vaccine reaction databases indicate, (2) the “vaccine” creates variants capable of escaping immune response, and (3) the vaccinated are contagious and dangerous to the unvaccinated.

Did the FDA largely shrug-off its regulatory duties and abandon its normal standards and protocols because

a– It wanted to rush the Covid vaccines into service as rapidly as possible?
b– It knew the Covid-19 vaccine would never meet long-term safety standards?

We don’t know yet, but the adverse events report strongly suggests that the Covid-19 vaccine is hands-down the most dangerous vaccine in history.

VERDICT

The Government is guilty of getting money from Big Pharma in the form of lobbying. They want control over people and are willing to kill them. They have no idea what the long term effects will be because they rushed it to market without proper testing.

Big Pharma is raking in the profits while having a track record of producing vaccines that don’t work. They paid off the Government to get emergency authorization and didn’t do proper testing to know what the effects will be.

Both are guilty of murder, but neither will be held accountable. Money talks and there is a lot of it going around. The People’s best interest is not a concern for them, power and control are.

Random Funny Thoughts

I had amnesia once — or twice.

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Protons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

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I am neither for nor against apathy.

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All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.

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If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.

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What is a “free” gift? Aren’t all gifts free?

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They told me I was gullible and I believed them.

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Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home, and when he grows up, he’ll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.

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Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.

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One nice thing about egotists … they don’t talk about other people.

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My weight is perfect for my height … which varies.

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I used to be indecisive. Now, I’m not sure.

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The cost of living hasn’t affected its popularity.

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How can there be self-help groups

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Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants off.

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Is it just me, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

Why I Don’t Argue On Line Anymore

I’ve written about Internet Road Rage and Stupid Things Smart People do. It’s also why I stay away from a lot of social media. My life is a lot happier that way. Also, I don’t have to worry about my body image that Zuckerberg lied about yesterday.

Today’s Covid Humor, What I Did At Home

I’ve been content free, so enjoy the laugh and do the usual copy and post on your social media of choice.

The trikini and marriage stuff is funny. Some of the Covid stuff makes too much sense.

Some of it just makes you think.