Delusions of Adequacy

A lot faster than I expected, another of our Analyst Relations team members has stepped up to the plate. Stefanie works on the Information Management team. I think our paths first crossed years ago when I was doing PR for the Networking Hardware Division. When I was reading this, I got a good chuckle, she’s witty and funny.

As for her request at the end of the blog, here you go Stefanie:

IWB

Remember readers, I’m taking suggestions for the next person you’d like to read about. So heeerreees Stefanie…..

What is your job title (and what does that really mean as far as your job)?
Analyst Relations, Information Management, IBM Software Group
(Less glamourous then PR, longer chart decks, but you don’t have to wear uncomfortable shoes)

Some work experience that you want to tell?
Have gotten up close and personal with some pretty cool technology– Almaden Labs, Montpelier, Watson, Endicott. Got to dissect a pSeries server once, saw the underground techno-hub of the US Open beneath Arthur Ashe Stadium.

How do you describe what you do?
I usually tell people that when they read an article in the newspaper that says “Computer Software Market Expected to Grow in Coming Year, According to Industry Analysts”, I’m the person who works with the “Industry Analysts” to help them get the information that allows them make that assessment.

Trouble is many of the people I tell this to didn’t ask in the first place, and therefore show limited enthusiasm because they would have skipped that article anyway and gone right to the obituaries or cross word puzzle (except for the pizza delivery guy– he really lit up when I mentioned CRM.)

What are good things about your job?
Not many people have a job where they get to listen to some of the smartest people on the planet talk about how they are inventing, creating and producing technology that will impact the lives of people around the world in the immediate future. (Well, people who might actually do this stuff and aren’t just wandering around the bus station talking about it.) Then I get to listen to other really smart people critique, improve or torpedo these ideas. McLaughlin Group for propeller heads– often with requisite yelling.
And covered parking– I like the covered parking.

What are things you would change?
MOR, MER, DCP, PPT, IMPT. I dream of a world of standard reporting, where data is pulled effortlessly in real time from a variety of sources and compiled and formatted according to requestor’s preference. A place where relationships and results, correlations and predictive analysis allow for strategic analysis and proactive planning based on predetermined goals. Everyone would have access to this data paradise would be able to use it to better do their jobs, with a minium of new effort, since the data already exists, we just need to free it.

Name a funny analyst story.
Accidentally responded to an exec in the wrong sametime window with a description of a certain analyst “the one with the with the profuse amount of chest hair which he has decided to emphasize as a distinguishing characteristic and could be classified either as an accessory or a small pet, depending on your frame of mind.” Exec insisted on knowing his name and when he’d next be briefed.

Describe an analyst win situation for you.
Formerly skeptical analyst from notoriously skeptical major analyst firm agrees to a call with potential customer to review her short-list. Customer later tells IBM sales team that formerly skeptical analyst’s recommendation was instrumental in her selection of IBM product. Sales team sends effusively happy email to hardworking, oft underappreciated AR team, with hearty thanks (but, alas, no offer to share in the commission. Gratitude apparently has its limits.)

Describe an analyst disaster for you. (no names)
Phone conversation: “You know that in person meeting we had set up with your firm in an hour to discuss our new product GA? Yes, the one that’s taken months of labor and mind-boggling frustration to schedule and required that several people in your firm to fly in from distant corners of the globe, another to change the date of his wedding, another to potentially miss the birth of his only child and another to miss her sister’s induction into the Clarinet Hall of Fame. Yes, the one we reschedule nine times in order to match our exec’s availability as well as the lunar cycle and the migratory patterns of the swallows of Capistrano and the availability of Celine Dion tickets at Caesar’s. That’s right, the one where we rushed the PO and threatened and cajoled our poor underappreciated coworkers in Procurement to approve– or else. The one you’ve been holding up publication of your definitive treatise on this marketspace for, as a personal favor to me because our fathers were war buddies in a foxhole together in WW2. Yes, that one.
Well, we’d like to cancel that. Oh, and instead we’ll actually be selling those technology assets to the other major player in this space. Yes, just like you advised us not to. And that executive has also decided to pursue his lifelong passion of macrame full time and has left this position. You can get all the details on the Web. Some reporter seems to have broken the story somehow and they are they are actually quoting your competitor. Well, my other line is ringing. I’m going to have to get that. Look forward to speaking with you more about this later.”

What would you like the analyst’s to do differently, suggestions of what would help both sides maybe.
Transparency in this industry is important. Analysts play a very complex role, serving several constituencies. The public should be aware of the nature of the relationships between analysts, end users and vendors and the different types of research available and the very different ways it is produced.

Any thing else I missed you want to say?
Can you add a link to IWB’s blog from this? Makes us virtual pals, almost. I’d like to bask in the reflected glory. He’s very cool.